Gild the Lily
by TheAtlantisGirl
Summary: She's a woman with no memory of her past that is trying to escape her future. One day she runs through the Stargate and winds up on Abydos with Jack and Daniel, but eventually her destiny catches up with her. She returns home, but before long their paths cross again in twists that threaten to destroy her and the life she creates on Earth. Jonas/OFC, M-Later, Reviews Appreciated
1. Shadows

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Tap, tap, tap, tap…

Tap, tap, tap, tap…

Sun poured in through the windows and gave the cold, white stoned room the appearance of warmth. It was almost empty apart from the one sitting at the table with papers spread out. An ink well sat several inches from their hand, feather pen sitting peacefully within it. They began to drum their nails again on the table in a steady, rhythmic fashion.

Tap, tap, tap, tap…

Tap, tap, tap, tap…

Tap, tap, tap, tap…

Rosalina sat quietly and alone in the Conclave as she had in recent days. The Conclave was the meeting room, for lack of a better term, where the Elders would meet the people and judge. It had been five years since she had made her speech and taken the position on Council. She had never expected there to be so much work involved. Though, she worked harder than most of the Elders who sat on Council. She expected to see each complainant in person, be present at each meeting, hearing, trial, prosecution, and execution as seldom as they were. She expected to be out amongst the people seeing what needed to be changed, updated, rearranged, and modified. She was the only one.

Most the Elders were just that; elders. They acted as such. They couldn't be bothered with interacting with the people they were supposed to be looking out for. Rosalina was the youngest member to ever sit on Council, having been merely twenty summers when she was voted to her seat. The youngest Elder in Luxima's history and the others resented her for it.

She was too young and too inexperienced, they said. She was not prepared, they said. She wasn't ready, they declared.

She agreed.

The people did not.

To them, she was exactly what they needed. She was young, yes, but that meant she was not of the same mind as the Elders. She was open-minded to change and an impartial judge. Thus, they gave her the title of _Elvira_ and the Seventh Seat. Most of all, she was just like her mother. She refused to follow the beat to anyone's drum besides her own. She would not be controlled by fear. She would fight when she had to, be ruthless if she needed to, kill or be killed if there was no other choice.

Rosalina moved her hand to the piece of parchment before her, fingers hovering over it as though they may burn if they touched it. Her deep, blue eyes scanned over the words again and then drifted away to the other pieces of parchment.

Her days were consumed with this research lately. She had to find something, anything that would give her an answer. She needed an answer, but the closest she had come was the parchment laying before her. A _Letter of Declaration_ signed by the High Elder, Uinseann. It was a _Letter of Declaration for the Seizure of_ _Celyna_ _Valara_ _Ora_ _Cadena_ _Levana_ ; Rosalina's mother.

A knock came from the doors leading into the room. Rosalina quickly snatched the parchment and folded it into a small square, hiding it beneath her on the seat.

"Yes?" She called out when no one opened the doors. She placed her hands flat on the table and was about to stand. "Yes? Hello?"

Slowly they opened and she sat herself back down firmly in her seat. A man with dark hair and eyes stepped into the room dawning black and purple robes; the High Elder.

"Oh Uinseann!" She exclaimed with a strained smile. "I wasn't expecting you to appear from behind the door. Is everything alright? Is there something I can do for you?"

The parchment burned beneath her leg on the seat where it sat. Uinseann's name stained forever in it as proof of his having some kind of role in her mother's disappearance so many years ago. Her hand came and rested on the side of her thigh, fingers grazing the edges of the folded parchment.

"I was only coming to check on you. You lock yourself away so often in here lately." Uinseann shook his head and looked at the papers spread across the table. He walked closer and picked up a paper, scanning its contents. "Interesting choice. _Letters of Declaration_?"

"I thought reading some would be a good way to learn how to word them." Rosalina quickly lied. "For when or if I ever have a need to write one."

Uinseann nodded his head and placed the paper back on the table, thinking nothing of it. At least that was what she hoped. He placed his hands behind his back and strode to the balcony doors. He looked out, sun washing over his aging face. His beard held in it strands of white as did his hair, wings adorning the sides of his head.

"I don't think it is good for you to be searching through the past." Uinseann turned his head and stared at her from across the room. She froze in her seat. Uinseann looked back out the window and sighed. "It is much more proactive to look towards the future. We cannot change the past. No matter how much or how little we wish we could."

"Yes, High Elder." Rosalina pulled the parchment from under her and slipped it into the band of her skirt. She quickly began to pull the papers into a pile. However, a hand slammed down on the pile and ceased her movements. The hand was rigid and heavy, wrinkles beginning to stretched across the back. Rosalina slowly followed the black and purple sleeve to look Uinseann in the eye.

"Whatever you are looking for," he started and leaned in closer, "stop. There are things in Luxima's past that ought not to be brought to the surface again."

Sapphire eyes met obsidian in a hard, unwavering stare. She knew that he had been on to her, following her, looking over her shoulder every time she started to get close.

 _He's hiding something._

"Is there something in **your** past, High Elder, which you do not wish to come to the surface?" Rosalina challenged him. Most were too afraid, but she had been put through too much by this man and the other Elders to be afraid. This was why she had been voted for the seventh seat on Council. This was why the people wanted her as an Elder. She was the only one willing to challenge their authority.

"We all have regrets, Rosalina." Uinseann slowly backed away, hand sliding from the pile of papers that Rosalina had refused to let go of. "We all have skeletons in our closets. You cannot be an effective Elder unless you make hard choices… and hard choices sometimes come back to haunt us."

Rosalina narrowed her eyes in question. Something was wrong. Uinseann was acting very peculiar. Normally he would have lashed out, told her she was ill experienced in such matters, that she had no right to be insinuating such things.

"High Elder?" Rosalina asked carefully as Uinseann began his retreat from the room. She stood up suddenly, chair screeching as it was pushed back. "Uinseann."

He turned at the use of his name. She could see in his dark eyes that he was remorseful of something. The Letters of Declaration had triggered something in him to cause him to remember something he regretted.

"What did you do?" Rosalina swore her voice was about to escape her. Uinseann looked towards the balcony again and gave a sad smile.

"We have all done many things we regret." His voice was soft. "And we are prepared to do many more before we meet our end. Be careful in the White City. Even though the sun shines bright, there are many shadows lurking in the darkness."

With that he opened the door and walked out of the Conclave. The door clicked shut and Rosalina couldn't help but turn her gaze towards the balcony. She walked to it apprehensively like a wild cat coming upon a human for the first time; unaware of what danger might be skulking around. She placed her hands on the doors and pulled them open. The sun washed over her like a tidal wave of warmth, blinding her. She stepped out onto the balcony and stood at the railing. She looked out at the city below.

The plaza was bustling with business from merchants, herbalists, tailors, and bards. Music echoed throughout the air followed by the wafting scent of honey cakes and fresh bread. Children played while their parents shopped. Dogs trotted through the streets while cats sat upon window sills and balconies.

Her eyes slowly began to notice the dark places. Places where the sun was blocked out either on purpose or by accident. Of course shady people congregated there where they could conduct their business. Luxima was not perfect after all. However, Rosalina failed to see the shadows that Uinseann had been talking about.

That was until she heard heavy footfalls of steel on stone. Her eyes drifted to the left and spotted the troop of Imperial soldiers. They held spears in their right hands and a sword on their left hip. They were heading towards the Castle.

 _Run._

"They may not be coming for me." Rosalina felt her heart drop.

 _Run._

"They're not coming for me." Rosalina declared and headed back inside the Conclave. She shut the doors to the balcony and headed to the door that would lead to the Main Hall. She opened it and walked out. Two soldier stood on either side of the double doors. Each carried a spear and sword like the troop. She looked from one to the other.

"Is everything alright Elvira?" The soldier to her right inquired, armor clanking as he turned to look at her. She licked her lips and gave a small smile while nodding her head.

"For now." She mumbled to herself and headed out into the Main Hall. She passed through the large columns adorned with intricate designs. She heard the boots and froze in her path. The troop marched into the Main Hall with their armor and boots echoing as they went. Rosalina stood straight with her hands fisted at her sides, waiting for them.

They passed her.

Rosalina released the breath that had been caught in her throat and turned to watch the troop continue their march. They headed into a hallway and disappeared with their boots and armor echoing behind them. She caught something move to her right, but did not look. Someone was hiding behind a column in the shadows with a hood drawn over to cover their face.

"My lady, Elvira!" Avia called from before me, heading into the Main Hall from where the troop had disappeared. She approached with smile spread across her again face. "Child, what is it?"

Rosalina did not move. She stared at Avia, but her attention was on the one in the shadows. They just watched; continuously.

"I'm being watched." Rosalina whispered and smiled at Avia, trying to act as though nothing was wrong.

"I've noticed." Avia took Rosalina by the arm and led her from the hall. "They have been following you for over a week now. I fear it is the Elders' doing."

"I'm beginning to think I need a vacation, Avia." Rosalina looked at the elderly woman briefly, trying to convey a message to her secretly. The clever woman understood and nodded her head in agreement.

"I hear Terra is lovely this time of year." Avia suggested and led Rosalina down another hall. The shadow followed behind them close enough for the hairs on the back of Rosalina's neck to stand up.

"I agree. It has been a while since I have seen them too. Might be nice to catch up, relax for a while. Put all this nonsense away." Rosalina and Avia stepped outside through the open doors at the end of the hall and headed into the garden. Cherry blossoms were forever blooming here and their scent tickled Rosalina's nose.

 _We must leave tonight._

"When do you expect to leave, my lady?" Avia asked and placed a hand on Rosalina's arm, ever letting go or loosening her hold from earlier.

"Perhaps tomorrow. There are still some things I must collect from the Record Keepers first." Rosalina didn't bother keeping her eyes trained on the shadow. She could feel them watching her. "Yes, tomorrow."

"Tomorrow." Avia repeated and patted Rosalina's arm, leading her through the gardens and back into the Castle. They headed up the stairs and passed the Council Chamber, heading for Rosalina's room. They entered and shut the door, locking it as quietly as they could behind them.

 _We **must** leave tonight._

"And so we shall." Rosalina replied and hurried to pack her things. She apologized in her head to General Hammond and Jack for not warning them of her coming. She couldn't warn them. Not if her life was in danger. Her shadow would surely have gotten their hands on her message and that would put all her efforts and the lives of her people and friends in danger as well.

* * *

Elvira = Impartial judgement


	2. Phantom

}{ Gild the Lily }{

Darkness had fallen over the city. The moon had risen and its soft glow left patches of shadows throughout, allowing some to roam freely. Most people were in bed already fast asleep, as they should be. Dangerous things came out at night around the White City. Spirits and monsters were free to wander the Forest and pathways when the sun went down. People who left the city walls usually went missing in the dark and were never heard from again.

But, this was her only chance though. She had to venture under the cover of darkness and brave whatever might be lurking about. The fear of what might be out there past the city walls would mean few would ever think to follow her into the forest. Spirits know, most the soldiers and warriors would feel the same way. The Forest was a sinister place for those who did not tread carefully; who went unknowingly into the darkness.

First, however, Rosalina needed to escape the Castle.

She stood by her door and pressed an ear to it. She could hear the boot falls of the two soldiers that were posted at each end of the hall as special protection for the Elders. She could also hear the muffled conversation of the two soldiers that stood on either side of the doors to her room. Extra protection for the newest member, Uinseann had told her. More eyes to watch her comings and goings, Avia had argued.

Rosalina was untrusted by the Elders. For good cause. She had been belligerent, rebellious and opposing them since before she had become one of them. The only reason she took the position was for her people and to learn the truth about her mother's disappearance.

She stepped away from the door and quickly looked about her room, her cloak swishing and swaying as she did so. Her quarters resembled something of a one story house. She had a small kitchen where Avia made most of her meals, despite her best efforts to cook for herself. There was a bedroom with a chest, a vanity, a bed fit for three, an armoire, and a bathroom that sat attached by a single door. There was also the main room where she stood now that had a table that could seat six, a couch, a small desk, bookshelves, and then the doors to the balcony that lay straight ahead of her.

Rosaline had a bag packed with essentials, such as clothing, some food, and her notes on her research. It sat on top of the table where she ate most of her meals with Avia, having vehemently refused to dine with the other Elders as of late. She didn't trust them and for good reason it would seem.

 _The balcony, Rose. Hurry now._

Rosalina walked to the balcony, grabbing her bag from the table as she passed. She threw the bag onto her shoulders and looked over the railing. It was a long drop to the bottom for a person to jump. Luckily, she wasn't just anyone. Rosalina took a deep breath and launched herself over the railing. The fall felt as though a lifetime, but took mere seconds to reach the bottom. She landed with her right knee on the ground and left leg bent, hands planted firmly on the dirt. She raised her head and looked about for any sign of movement or alarm.

She could make the jump, but the landing was hard to control how she would hit it. The fall had ended with a loud _thump_ that may have woken someone. She knew she needed to be quieter if she was going to escape without notice… or a tussle with a soldier or two.

She picked herself up and started to walk in the very shadows that Uinseann had warned her about. She had grown up in these shadows of the White City unlike the other Elders. They had lived a life of luxury, had gotten their positions based on family lineage and bribing the right people. It disgusted Rosalina just as it disgusted many of the people in the city. She understood the people who resided in the shadows just as well as those who resided in the sunlight, but the shadows were her home. At least they became her home after her mother had disappeared.

The city had fallen into chaos after her vanishing. She had been an important member of the Council. She had been the Healer at the time. No one knew who was to blame or what had truly happened. It was all a muddled mess of lies and snakes. Rosalina had been just a child then. Father dead years before and mother missing, Rosalina was sent to live in an orphanage. Avia hadn't allowed that for too long before she decided Rosalina would live with her. The shadows of the city had become Rosalina's home because that's where Avia had raised her. She knew their ins and outs like the back of her own hand.

Rosalina moved on tip toe like some kind of wild cat on the prowl, keeping as close to the buildings as possible. She let her fingers glide along the building walls till she came to the end. She stopped, pressed her back to the building firmly and looked around the corner. Four Imperial soldiers passed in a march of their rounds with hands firmly placed on the hilt of their swords that sat at their hips.

Rosalina moved to the next building as soon as they were in the distance and then to the next in a well mapped out route she had taken as a child many times. She stopped before the gates to the city and watched, trying to note where all the soldiers were. Torches were lit and their orange glow helped Rosalina see the two soldiers that stood directly in front of the gates. Two more were posted up top looking for any incomers with a torch in one hand, pacing the wall.

 _There's more. There has to be._

Rosalina agreed. There had to be more. The Elders could be careless and unconcerned with the people at times, but for their own safety they would never allow less than eight soldiers at the gate. Especially at night, but she could only find four.

 _They're there. Do not move until you see them._

Rosalina trusted the voice in her head and why shouldn't she? If anything happened to her, then the voice was at risk as well. If Rosalina died, the voice died too.

 _There! By the fountain!_

Rosalina's eyes shot to the large fountain thirty feet from the gates. Constructed of pristine white marble like most of the White City, a statue of a middle-aged woman resided in the middle. She had hair that was forever flowing in the wind, tattered Gunda uniform worn from battle and struggle, and a torch in one hand while the other clasped a Luximan sword. She was Lucretia, the woman who led Luxima out of slavery from a Gou'ald overlord a long, long time ago. Since then, the Luximans had preserved a Matriarchal society in her honor.

The soldiers sat on the fountain's ledge with their spears leaning at their sides and drinks in their hands. Their helmets sat at their feet as they spoke and laughed at something one or another said. One stood up and turned towards the fountain, relieving himself into the ever flowing waters.

"Are they… drunk?" Rosalina couldn't help but to ask aloud. Not so loud that anyone would hear, but so that she could make sure she was seeing what she thought. "Imperial soldiers, drunk on the job. This is why we have Gundas. If we placed some here as I suggested, then we wouldn't have this problem."

 _Focus Rosalina! You can worry another day about these men pissing on your heritage. Right now we must escape from the White City._

Rosalina shook her head at the men's disrespectful behavior, but moved quickly from her spot as ordered. She quickly scaled the wall and hopped down onto the ledge. She crouched and watched the solider with the torch from the shadows. His back was to her, having already walked and searched for anything suspicious in her direction.

 _Now! Go while his back is turned!_

Rosalina crept to the other side and poised herself to jump. She froze however. Something in the forest had let out a booming roar. One unlike anything Rosalina had ever heard before. It sounded _unnatural_ and moved across the air like rolling thunder.

"Gaenor," Rosalina breathed out and pulled herself back a step from the edge of the wall, "what the Hell was that?"

 _I don't know._

"It sounded big." Rosalina's eyes scanned the forest in earnest search of the beast the sound had come from.

 _Yes, it did._

"You truly do not know what it is?" Rosalina asked again and looked towards the soldiers. The two with torches continued their rounds along the wall as though nothing had happened. Their actions seemed peculiar to her.

Had they not heard it too? Were they not afraid?

 _Something is very wrong here, Rose._

"I'm noticing that, Gaenor." She breathed out and watched the light from the torch disappear. "They didn't hear it."

 _No, it would appear not._

Rosalina looked back at the forest. She could see more now that the glow of the torch was gone. She could make out a small dirt path that led through the woods. She knew that path. She had taken it many times as a child and as a Warrior on marches to battle.

"We have one shot at this." She breathed out, unable to locate the beast in the darkness. She licked her lips as her eyes continuously scanned the trees.

 _Run Rose._

Rosalina hopped over the side of the wall and landed as she had before on one knee with her hands flat on the ground. She picked up her head, but did not move a muscle. She could see something moving in the trees; a shadow. A shadow with glowing blue eyes.

 _Rose, I know what that is…_

"I don't care right now. We need to leave." Rosalina watched the shadow and the shadow watched her, both waiting for the other to make the first move. She could hear its heavy breathing, see its body heaving with each breath.

 _Rose that's a–_

"Phantom." As soon as the confirmation left her lips the beast gave another thunderous roar. Rosalina sprinted from her spot and into the forest, disregarding the path that the shadow was waiting by. Branches whipped at her, scratching and cutting her. She staggered a couple of times from over grown roots and rocks and holes in the earth, but she did not waver. She kept running as hard and as fast as she could.

Things clinked and clanked in her pack. She decided that the phantom would be able to follow her whether she threw her pack away or not. It could sense her in some supernatural way that could not be understood. Her only hope was to reach the Stargate and make it through without that thing following her.

The phantom kept on her. Its movements were jerky almost jolting forward in short bursts like electricity might do. Rosalina had seen many things in her days on the warpath in the service of the White City, but this was something new; something old. Perhaps even ancient.

 _It's gaining ground. You need to move faster._

"Shut up." Rosalina snapped at the voice inside her head. She needed to concentrate on where she was going. She was far from the path that led a person safely through its center. She was creating her own in the hopes that she could lose her tail. Unfortunately, she was the only one seeming to become lost.

Then she saw it.

"The Falls." She breathed out and willed her legs to move faster towards the waterfall. If she could make it passed the sheet of water guarding the entrance and into the Grotto, perhaps the phantom might lose her or at least it would stall it for a moment so she could escape through the Stargate.

"What is this?" She felt the ground shake beneath her and then it began to crack like an earthquake. Stones rumbled and rolled away while others fell into the cracks.

 _The phantom's presence has upset something._

"Upset what though?" She snapped back and continued to run. She could hear the bustling waters, could smell the falls, the wet rocks.

 _There are a lot older things on this planet than I or that phantom, Rose. Things that the Gou'ald wanted to exploit, but never were able to control._

"You have a lot of explaining to do." Rosalina chided the voice, who had on many occasions claimed to know nothing about the planet. Despite Daniel's insistence that it did. "Daniel's going to be so pissed with us."

She could see the end of the line ahead. A cliff awaited her with the promise of freedom. She grabbed hold of the straps to her pack and braced herself. She leapt into the open air, moon shining brightly above. She spun herself around and watched as the phantom held fast at the edge, blue eyes jerking left and right. It was unsure of what to do. This was a good sign that she had made the right choice.

Then it too leapt into the air after her.

Rosaline could feel water misting her skin as she fell. The phantom falling with her, blue eyes locking on her form. The sound of the falls faded away and only her heavy breathing was left accompanied by the sound of the wind whistling by her ears. Everything seemed to slow. A second became a minute as they continued to fall towards the dark, rushing water below.

The phantom reached out a long, dark arm with claws, towards her as though to grab her mid-air. Rosaline spun herself and straightened, propelling herself into the ice cold waters. A moment later the phantom hit like rock. The dark mass floated downwards seeming to be in shock of the hit as Rosaline swam as quickly as she could. She could see where the Falls waters hit the river. She needed to get to the sheet of water guarding the entrance to the Grotto

She came up for air, gasping and sputtering. The icy water stung her skin and slowed her muscles. She turned towards the Falls and began to swim. The phantom surfaced a moment later with a screech as though the water was acid eating away at it. She looked back at it, treading water.

 _No! Swim Rosalina! To the Grotto!_

Rosalina tried the best she could, but she was beginning to slow down. She was tired and the water was so very cold and the entrance to the Falls so very far away. She had landed further than she had planned to, than she had hoped to.

Something caught her foot and pulled her under the surface in one fell swoop, arms flailing as she disappeared beneath the dark waters. She turned and looked below her, barely making out the glowing blue eyes and the claw that had wrapped itself around her foot. She kicked and screamed under the water, trying to release its hold on her. It was too strong.

 _Keep fighting!_

Rosalina struggled to reach the surface. Her arms flailed and she kicked, but she was losing the battle. The phantom dragged her further and further down into the darkness.

 _Rosalina!_

She begin to feel all the air leaving her lungs. Pain replaced it and soon water followed, flowing in like a stream. She slowed, gasping at the water for air. Arms and body soon went limp. With eyes wide open, she looked up at the moon above the Falls through the surface of the water. Her hands outstretched towards it in some hope that it could save her.

 _Rosalina!_

A figure stood atop the falls staring down at her through the water. They were cloaked or a shadow. Rosalina's mind was falling away too quickly for it to register which was correct. It raised their hand, a soft blue light emitting from it and stretching towards the water. It touched the surface just as Rosalina blacked out, sinking further down with the phantom and its glowing blue eyes unwilling to release her.

* * *

Gaenor = Ghost

Gunda = Female Warrior


	3. Necromancer

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

It seemed like a normal, uneventful day. It was supposed to be eighty with partly sunny skies. Perfect day for fishing or so Colonel Jack O'Neil thought as he sat in his office, drumming a pencil against his desk. He hardly ever went in there. He was usually out on missions or saving Daniel's ass from sure doom.

"Could have been fishing." Jack mumbled and dropped the pencil like it had bitten him. He pushed himself away from the desk and stood up. "Should be fishing."

He walked to the door of his office and peeked out into the hallway. Several people walked by in their fatigues and greeted him. He gave a forced smile and nodded his head at them, retreating back into his prison cell. He closed the door and looked around the room, noticing how plain and just boring it was. It had no personality because it never needed it. He never used it.

"Come on…!" He hissed and looked up at the ceiling of the room. "Help me out here."

Suddenly, as if his wish had been granted, alarms went off. The red light above his door began to flash.

"Yes!" He quickly pulled the door back open again and headed out into the hall. The alarms continued and the red lights flashed in the halls. Soldiers ran this way and that through the halls in preparation.

Jack O'Neil walked with a bounce in his step down the hall in green fatigues and all the way to the Control Room of Stargate Command. He saluted General Hammond and nodded at Daniel Jackson, both of whom had been there since the first alarm sounded. He strode up besides Daniel and looked at the Stargate that was open, familiar blue ripple spread across it.

"Sooooo," Jack started and turned his attention away from the Stargate to look between the two, "What's going on?"

"Someone dialed the gate." Daniel's response came so easily and quickly.

"Uh," Jack looked from Daniel to the gate and then back again, "Yeah. I can see that. Who though?"

"We don't know. There's been no response from the other side. No messages or anything to help tell us who it is." Daniel explained crossing his arms in front of him and placing a hand to his chin. "It's strange. She would have sent us a warning before she showed up."

" _Whooo_ , Daniel?" Jack looked at the archaeologist with a sarcastic smile. Daniel only looked at him from the corner of his eye and then turned back to the stargate.

"Rose." He replied quickly, glancing from the corner of his eyes at Jack.

"Oh." Jack replied slowly and nodded his head, acting as though that seemed a normal answer. "And she's not answering us? That's rude."

Daniel shook his head and turned to Jack. The Colonel gave him a look that begged the question – _What?_

Daniel let his arms drop from his chest and then headed for the stairs. He quickly strode down them and headed down the hall to the door leading into the Stargate room. Jack was quick at his heels.

"Uh, Dr. Jackson," Jack raised a finger in mock and followed after him, "Quick question. When were you going to tell me that our little Rose was coming to visit?"

"Um because I didn't know, Jack." Daniel shoved his hands into his pocket and look at Jack with sardonic smile that told Jack he was annoyed. "No one knew she was coming. It's unscheduled."

"That's odd." Jack finally said, looking Daniel over once more and then turning his attention to the Stargate that was still open. "Usually she sends that Avia lady with a message telling us when she's going to be stopping by. Kind of her style."

"That's what I said." Daniel replied and looked at the Stargate with Jack. "It doesn't make sense. She's always lets us know when she's coming and the fact that no one has responded or come through yet worries me."

"What do you think Jack?" General Hammond's voice spoke through the speakers. Jack turned and looked up at him in the Control Room. Jack looked back at the Stargate with a questioning eye. He was unsure what they should do. Nothing had come out of the Stargate yet, but they had obviously received some kind of code from Luxima otherwise the Iris would be closed. Yet, no one was responding to their messages.

"Jack," Daniel started and turned to his friend. In a quieter voice he said, "Something must be wrong. Rose wouldn't just open the Stargate and not come through unless she was in trouble. You know that."

"But that's just it Daniel. I don't know." Jack looked to him and pointed at the Stargate. "What if it's not Rose at all that opened the Stargate?"

"Who else would it be Jack?" Daniel ran a hand over his mouth, becoming anxious. He quickly crossed his arms over his chest.

"I dunno." Jack shrugged his shoulders and lifted his chin. "What about that Uinseann guy? He seemed pretty smart."

"Smart yes, but Jack…" Daniel's face dropped. "I seriously doubt Uinseann would have used the Stargate. He and the other Elders fought Rose about that the entire time we were there. They were strictly opposed to leaving it uncovered. Let alone allowing anyone to use it. They even told us they weren't going to let the people know there was a Stargate at all or that they had met people from another planet. They were also against any kind of friendship forming between Luxima and Earth."

Jack and Daniel stared each other down in silence. Daniel caught his breath and Jack processed everything that had been said.

"I believe those pencil pushers used the term _need_. They don't _need_ a friendship with Earth and they _refused_ to let their people know about us." Jack corrected, raising a finger again. Daniel swatted it away and shook his head. He was not amused by the Colonel today. "Well, okay, Daniel...! What do **you** think we should do?"

"I think Rose might be in trouble." Daniel looked at the Stargate, "I think we owe it to her to go and at least check it out. Make sure nothing is seriously wrong and perhaps this is just some kind of interference or technology malfunction."

"What kind of trouble could that girl get herself into?" Jack gave a small laugh and shook his head, knowing fully well what kind of trouble she could have gotten into. Hell, she was AWOL when he and Daniel had come upon her on Abydos He placed his hand on his hips and cursed under his breath.

"Well, Jack," Daniel pushed his glasses up his nose and returned his arm to his chest, "She would be twenty-five now. Not exactly the same girl we knew anymore."

"Twenty-five?" Jack asked, thoroughly surprised. He narrowed his eyes at Daniel. "Really? Are you sure? I could have sworn-"

"Very sure, Jack." Daniel nodded his head and gave a sarcastic, irritated smile. "We celebrated her twentieth birthday on Abydos that night Kasuf gave me Sha're to be my bride as a show of good faith between us. Remember?"

"Oh." Jack suddenly remembered. "Yeah, that night."

"She's never asked us for anything and has tried to help us every time we ask." Daniel glanced up at General Hammond in the Control Room and then looked back at Jack. "We owe this much to her."

"I know." Jack started into the open Stargate. He looked up at General Hammond briefly and then looked to Daniel, nodding his head. "We can at least check it out and make sure everything is alright."

He looked back at General Hammond. The General nodded, sensing to what they expected to do. He bent down to the freestanding mic.

"Colonel, Dr. Jackson, you'd better grab your gear." General Hammond ordered. "I'll make sure Major Carter and Teal'c get up here and are ready to head out. I'm also having you take team 4 with you."

"Thank you sir!" Jack called back as he and Daniel headed out of the room to quickly prepare.

Everyone was back in the Gate Room quickly, prepared and ready to go. Jack stood at the forefront with a hand on the hilt of his handgun, strapped tightly to his hip. He fixed his hat and looked back at his team, nodding to them.

"Everyone ready?" Jack asked, not bothering to turn around again to look at them. Whether they were ready or not he was going through the Stargate. "Let's head out!"

Jack began his stride up the ramp with Daniel at his side. Carter and Teal'c followed closely behind with SG-4 behind them. They had their guns ready and were prepared for whatever may be on the other side of the gate. Jack and Daniel stopped before it and stared into the blue ripples.

"Jack?" Daniel asked quietly, unsure why he had stopped. Jack wasn't sure why he had either. Something in his bones told him to stay put. So he did. He looked to Daniel and they just stared at each other. Jack tried to form words, but could find none.

Suddenly, something flew through the Stargate and landed on the ramp in a heap before Jack's feet. Jack bent down and turned it over.

"What is it?" General Hammond asked over the speaker system. Jack picked it up and turned around to show the others, including General Hammond in the Control Room. It was a pack, a military.

"I'd say it was a Condor-II in khaki, sir!" Jack replied and looked the pack over in his hands. He knew this pack. He had given it away as a gift to–

Something else soared through the Stargate and landed off to the side of Daniel. It was a person, hooded and cloaked so the person's face was hidden from view. A hand was exposed, lying beside their hooded face; slender with manicured nails. Hair spilled out from the side of the hood; golden blonde.

"Rose." Daniel breathed out and moved to her quickly, turning her over carefully. He pulled back her hood and looked down at her. She was cold, but she was breathing. She had cuts and scrapes, but she would live. "Rose? Rose, can you hear me?"

Jack made a move to follow, but someone stepped out from the Stargate and blocked his path. They too were hooded in a black cloak, dawned with blue inlays. They looked at Jack, who stood waiting in his spot. Carter and Teal'c drew their weapons along with SG-4, aiming them at the newcomer in case they were hostile.

"Puella autem sedete hic tecum." The voice was soft and hard to tell whether male or female by some kind of magic.

"What?" Jack asked snappily, but did not look to Daniel.

"She said Rose has to stay here." Daniel translated, looking up at the person. He swore he could just barely make out their features.

"You can understand them?" Jack asked, his eyes never moving.

"They're speaking Latin, Jack." Daniel answered, also never turning his gaze from the figure.

"In eo est ut ipsius periculum Luxima. Et non cognoscebat eam donec poterit praecipiemus."

"What did they say?" Jack glanced in Daniel's direction.

"Uh, they said… Rose is in danger in Luxima and that she won't be able to return till whatever it is that's happening is over." Daniel narrowed his eyes, trying to focus on the face beneath the hood.

"Evocatorem…" Rose stirred in Daniel's arms. He looked down at her, seeing her eyes fluttering open and extending a finger in the direction of the stranger by the gate. "Evocatorem…!"

"Demum stellae clausae portae remanebit _._ " The stranger stated and then quickly retreated through the gate. The Stargate suddenly closed, but Rose was still calling after the one who had left through it.

"Evocatorem! Evocatorem!" She called out with tears in her eyes. Jack moved quickly to Daniel's side and Rose jumped at him, clutching his shirt in her hands. "Evocatorem!"

Jack took hold of her, wrapping his arms protectively around her. He spoke soothingly to her to try and calm her, but she just sobbed. He looked to Daniel in question.

"Dr. Frasier to the Gate Room! Stat!" Deneral Hammond called over the speaker system. Daniel had one of Rose's hands in his own and squeezed it to try and comfort her.

"Evocatorem! Fui mortuus… Et fui mortuus, et adduxit me illuc!" Rose yelled and hid her face in Jack's shoulder.

"What is she saying?" Jack asked and then whispered to her that everything was alright. That she was safe and at Stargate Command. Jack looked to Daniel, whose face portrayed worry. "Daniel?"

"Move, move! Out of my way!" Dr. Frasier came running into the room with two nurses and a gurney. The nurses grabbed Rose, who fought against them and earned herself an injection to calm her down. She began to fall asleep, looking between Daniel and Jack.

"Et fui mortuus, et adduxit me illuc…" Her hand began to slip from Daniel's. "Erat fuscus… Solus eram in tenebris."

"Pick her up." Dr. Frasier ordered and the nurses pulled Rose from Jack's arms. He stood up and watched the medical team wheel Rose out and down the hall. He ran a hand over his mouth and looked at the Stargate as if trying to process what had just happened.

"Colonel?" Major Carter asked, but he didn't reply. She looked from Teal'c and then to Daniel.

"O'Neil." Teal'c tried as well, but he was lost to them all.

"Jack?" Daniel walked up beside him.

"She was terrified Daniel. I could see it in her eyes." Jack turned to look at his old friend. Daniel could see how upset Jack was from seeing Rose the way she was. He had a relationship with her much the same as the one he shared with Skaara. "Somethin' bad's happening in Luxima."

Jack slowly walked passed his team and followed the direction the medical team had gone. Carter, Teal'c and Daniel all looked at each other. No one had to say anything. They all knew what the others were already thinking and feeling.

* * *

Evocatorem = Necromancer

 _P_ _uella autem sedete hic tecum. In eo est ut ipsius periculum Luxima. In eo est ut ipsius periculum Luxima. Et non cognoscebat eam donec poterit stellae clausae portae remanebit._

 **The girl must stay here with you. She is in danger in Luxima. She will not be able to return till it is over. The Stargate will remain closed.**


	4. Death Changes You

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

It had been a full day since Rose had been thrown through the Stargate like a piece of luggage. She had been taken immediately to the Medical Wing and placed under the care of Dr. Frasier. Jack and Daniel had checked in on her, but Dr. Frasier had no news for them. She didn't know why Rose hadn't woken up yet. The drug they had given her hadn't been too much. She claimed that perhaps it was stress of whatever had happened before coming through the Stargate. Jack knew that was it. He could feel it in his bones.

SG-1 and General Hammond sat at the oblong table in the debriefing room. Jack played with a pencil, leaning back in his seat. Daniel stared down at the blue folder in front of him. Carter and Tael'c continuously shared looks.

No one had said anything. No one knew how to begin.

"Does anyone know what is going on?" General Hammond asked finally, leaning forward in his seat with his hands laced together and sitting before him on the table.

"Not particularly, sir." Jack replied quietly and looked over at Daniel. Jack tapped the pencil on the table a moment and then tossed it away. "Who was that guy? And what was it that Rose kept on calling him?"

"Uh, I think it was _e_ _vocatorem_." Daniel licked his suddenly dry lips and fidgeted in his seat. His fingers played with the side of the folder. "It essentially means necromancer."

"In… Latin…?" Jack asked slowly. "In a dead language."

"Dead to us Jack." Daniel was quick to rebound. "Luxima isn't the only planet we've come across where they were speaking a language that is dead here on Earth."

"True." Jack accepted this and a finger began to play with the pencil again.

"So what is a necromancer exactly?" General Hammond looked to Daniel to explain. Daniel looked to him and straightened slightly.

"Well, some believed that through necromancy, a necromancer could use magic to communicate with the dead. Either by summoning the spirit of the deceased or actually raising them from the dead." Daniel explained and placed his hands on top of the table, lacing his fingers together. "Now most times, these people did this for divination purposes to impart means to foretell future events or discover some kind of hidden knowledge. Other believed they could use the deceased as a sort of weapon to do whatever their master's willed."

"What was a necromancer doing with Rose to begin with?" Carter asked, leaning back in her seat. "She doesn't exactly have a whole lot of friends in the White City."

"I do not think that was a friend, Major Carter." Teal'c commented slowly and firmly.

"Rose kept saying, **I was dead. I was dead and** _ **they**_ **brought me back**." Daniel explained and looked around the table.

"Who did?" General Hammond tried to keep up. Sometimes, Daniel found, that topics such as these just seemed to go over military heads. "This necromancer?"

"I'd say it would be safe to assume, yes." Daniel replied and then leaned forward on the edge of his seat. "I think that Rose died and this necromancer brought her back to life."

"Why?" Jack stared across the table at Daniel. "And using what?"

"Oh I don't know Jack." Daniel began, sarcasm rising in his voice. "Magic perhaps."

"Magic?" Carter blurted out, giving a few laughs. "Daniel, most likely this person used some kind of technology to bring Rose back, like a sarcophagus, and then claimed they were a necromancer so that they could control the people."

"Jack," Daniel rounded on Jack, ignoring Carter. "All the times we've been to Luxima or Rose has come here, have you ever seen a modern piece of technology?"

Jack tried to think of one, "No."

"Have you ever seen a staff weapon or a zat'ni'katel?"

"No." jack replied, but tried to think of ever seeing any advanced technology. "But they do have a Stargate."

"Yes, they have a Stargate because of the Gou'ald that enslaved them all centuries ago." Daniel tried to prove his point before he was shot down again. "They use swords and spears. The Imperial army wears metal armor and helmets."

"Dr. Jackson, what exactly are you trying to get at?" General Hammond asked as he laced his hands together and rested them on the top of the table.

"That just because we haven't found evidence of magic before doesn't mean that there isn't such a thing. I think, of any civilization we have ever seen that may have something more than just advanced technology, it's with the Luximans; with Rose." He finished quickly and sat back in his chair.

"Okay, but why Rose? Of all people." jack asked, trying to stump Daniel. It had worked. Daniel had no answer.

"I don't know." Daniel shook his head and slouched back into his seat. He pulled off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose, eyes closing tightly. "Maybe because she's an Elder now."

"She's a what?!" Jack couldn't contain his outburst and leaned forward on the table, nearly able to touch Daniel. "She's turned into one of those stick-in-the-muds?"

"I don't know about a stick-in-the-mud, Jack, but I do know that it's a great honor in their society. To be an Elder means to have some control over the politics in Luxima and to have made a name for yourself. They're chosen based on merit and achievements and for Rose being so young, it's an even bigger accomplishment." Daniel tried to explain, but he could see that Jack didn't care so much. He never could understand how Jack cared so little for people's lives and traditions and only for the people themselves. "I'm sure Rose felt that she could help the people more if she hung up her sword and picked up a quill instead."

"And I bet that makes you so proud." Jack jabbed at him and just sat. He stared at Daniel. Hard. "And how do you know all this Daniel?"

"Because I keep in contact with her, Jack." Daniel was quickly losing his patience with him. Jack narrowed his eyes and shook his head at him. Daniel had jabbed him back. They were both friends with Rose, but Rose had always done more to stay in contact with them than the other way around.

"Can we please get back to the situation at hand?" General Hammond asked, trying to round up the troops sitting at the table. "If it isn't because Rose is an Elder, then what else could it be?"

"Well, sir I don't know." Daniel admitted and looked back to the General. "There's still a lot we don't know about Luxima and the people. The Elders shut us out within the first two days of discovering the planet. I think that was another reason why Rose took the position. To help bring Luxima and Earth into a political friendship eventually."

"So we have a young lady, thrown through our Stargate by a no named necromancer who tells us that Rose can't go home until they unlock the Stargate from their end, which we're still baffled about how they are accomplishing this with no advanced technologies and Rose in a hysterical panic over this person stating that they had brought her back from the dead." General Hammond tried to sum up. "Am I missing anything?"

"No sir." Jack looked around the table and then slowly pushed himself away from it, standing up. "I think you hit the nail on the head."

"Colonel?" General Hammond asked and looked to Jack as he walked towards the door. "Where are you going?"

"Well, we want an answer. So I thought I would just ask the only person who might know what's going on about it." Jack shoved his hands into his pockets and looked around at them all.

"Rose is still unconscious, O'Neil." Teal'c spoke up, sitting straight and resolute in his chair. Jack nodded.

"Yeah, but I wasn't talking about Rose." Jack nodded again, gave a halfhearted salute and walked out the door. The rest turned and stared at Daniel, silently asking him what the Colonel meant.

"Don't look at me." Daniel started as he stood up, pulling his papers into a pile before him. "I have no idea what he's talking about."

But in fact, Daniel did. He and Jack knew about Gaenor and how she shared Rose's body. Rose had made them swear not to tell any of the others, however, to which they had kept their promise for years.

Jack walked into the Medical Wing and looked about at the empty beds. He spotted Rose lying in a bed towards the back left corner and headed her way. Dr. Frasier was nowhere to be found and neither were any of the nurses. He jaunted on up to Rose's bedside with a hop in his step and swayed back and forth on his heels, hands still in his pockets.

The ECG machine beeped away rhythmically.

"I know _you're_ awake at least." He spoke carefully, staring down at Rose's still form. She made no moment. Jack moved a little bit closer and sat on the edge of the bed beside hers. "Oh come on! I know you're in there."

Rose's eyes slowly opened. She blinked several times and then rolled her head in Jack's direction.

"Gaenor." Jack greeted hesitantly, lifting his head and looking down at Rose with an odd expression plastered on his face. "Long time no see. Well… actually I've never actually seen **you** , just you inside of Rose's body."

"O'Neil." Gaenor greeted back and rolled Rose's head back into a comfortable position. She took a deep breath and then looked back at Jack. "Where are we?"

"Stargate Command. In the medical wing. Dr. Frasier has been monitoring you guys carefully in case something happened." Jack replied as Gaenor observed the room behind him. Jack noticed the eyes. Rose's eyes were blue; sapphire blue. These were not. These eyes were ice blue. "I've got a few questions for you, _Gaenor_. Since I can't talk to Rose at the moment and all."

"Of course." Gaenor looked to Jack, focusing on his face.

"Rose is an Elder now I hear." Jack was not so subtle in expressing his distaste for the Elders and the Council they sat on. "That's great."

"She didn't want to."

"Then why did she?"

"Because Luxima is unstable at the moment and she believed she could do more good on the Council then carrying a sword."

"Trading the sword for a quill…" Jack mumbled and shook his head.

"Sorry?"

"Nothing." Jack looked back at Gaenor and scratched his forehead. "You said Luxima is unstable. How unstable?"

"The people are growing… impatient with change that the Elders promised them. They hoped having Rose on the Council would makes things move more quickly, but they have impeded her every time she tries to change something. They claim she is too young and that she can't possibly know what is right for the people."

"You think otherwise?" Jack asked and Gaenor turned her gaze upon him.

"Don't you?" She stared at him for a long moment and then looked back at the blanket that covered her.

"What happened yesterday?" It was simple and to the point. Gaenor gave a heartfelt laugh and looked down at the blanket that covered Rose's body.

"If I could remember…" Gaenor's expression changed and she gripped the blanket tightly in a fist. "Sadly, it's all muffled. Like one of your movies with the scenes all jumbled."

"You don't remember anything?" Jack found this hard to believe. He didn't quite trust Gaenor, but because she wasn't hurting Rose, he would tolerate her crap. For now. "Nothin'? Not a thing?"

Gaenor's eyes narrowed as she tried to remember something. It was all as she said; jumbled. Pieces of her and Rose's memory were free floating, unable to connect in a sensible order of any kind.

"I remember us being in the Conclave looking through papers. Rose was researching something and Uinseann came in." Gaenor began and closed her eyes. "Soldiers with torches. Rose running from something in the Forest. The moon from beneath the surface of water…"

The room fell silent. Gaenor shook her head and looked back at Jack. He could see the disappointment in her eyes, the confusion. Jack nodded his head and patted her on the arm.

"It's okay." He spoke softly. He let his hand linger a moment longer. "Is Rose alright? I mean, can you tell if she is?"

Gaenor looked off to the side as though trying to sense Rose within the body. She shook her head slowly, "I'm not sure."

"What do you mean?" Jack blurted out and pulled his hand back.

"There's something strange." Gaenor met Jack's worried gaze. She shook her head again. "She's different; altered. I can't figure out what it is."

"When she came through the gate, when she woke up," Jack began and laced his hands together in his lap, "She was saying that she had died and that a necro-whatever had brought her back to life."

Gaenor's eyes went wide as fear filled her features.

"Judging by your look, I'd say that was a bad thing." Jack couldn't help the sarcasm. It was in his nature. It was how he dealt with things.

"That's what it is..." Gaenor breathed out and blinked several times. "That's why I can't sense..."

"Sense what?"

Gaenor's gaze snapped to him.

"Jack, something has been **altered** in Rose." She began and then shook her head. "You can't just come back from the dead and expect to be the same. Death changes you. It changes you forever."

"You came back fine." Jack tried to argue, but Gaenor shook her head harshly.

"I'm already dead." She stated. "I have been for a very long time. I just reside in the back of Rose's mind, sharing her body."

It grew very quiet in the room. Gaenor look out at the bed across from hers while Jack just watched her, hoping to see some sign that Rose was okay.

"So what's going to happen to her?" Jack's voice was soft as though afraid his words may jinx something.

"She'll wake up." Gaenor confirmed and nodded her head as though trying to convince herself of something.

"But…?" Jack could hear it in her voice. There was something more. Gaenor looked to him and just stared for a long moment.

"I'm not sure it will be our Rose." She shook her head slowly, eyes filled with apprehension. "Coming back from death is like… each time it steals a little piece of you and replaces it with something else."

"What do you mean something else?"

"Jack, I don't know." Gaenor replied quickly. She could sense his uneasiness, his worry for Rose. Gaenor had long sense Jack held a paternal protectiveness for Rosalina. "It could be something as simple as her hair changing colors to a complete personality alteration."

"So we won't know anything until she finally wakes up." Jack fell quiet. "And we have no idea of knowing when that may be."

"I will look for her in the recesses of her mind." Gaenor shook her head. "But I make no promises of what I may find."

Jack looked back at Gaenor and nodded his head. He stood up from the bed he sat on and turned to walk away. He froze and slowly turned back around. He opened his mouth to say something, but the words escaped him. He took a deep breath and then turned away again, leaving Gaenor alone in Rose's body.

"Rose," Gaenor closed her eyes and tried to reach out to Rosalina, "if you're listening, if you can hear me, you need to pull yourself together. Your friends need you."


	5. Paternal Instinct

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Days had turned into weeks. Weeks had turned into months. There was no sign that Rose was even still hanging around her body. Her vitals were good, heartbeat steady, but she still hadn't woken up. Dr. Frasier assured everyone that it wasn't the drug that Rose had been injected with. It was something else, but she couldn't figure out what.

Gaenor had tried and tried to locate her on her own. She had gone deep with Rose's mind, but it was a labyrinth; a turn here, a door there, most times a dead end. She believed Rose may be gone completely, that coming back from crossing over had been too much for her and she had either fled somehow or had been destroyed. Jack felt otherwise though and made sure that Gaenor shared his belief. So, Gaenor kept trying to find Rose.

Jack currently sat beside Sergeant William Harriman in the Control Room, staring at the Stargate. His left leg bounced anxiously as he leaned back in his chair, arms crossed over his chest.

"Chevron five; locked." Harriman announced, typing away at his workstation. Jack leaned forward and placed his chin in the palm of his hand and elbow on top of the workstation. He took a deep breath and then released a heavy sigh. "Chevron six; locked."

"Come on…" Jack muttered to himself as he watched Harriman type in the final coordinate for Luxima.

"Chevron seven… not locked."

Jack let his head fall and banged his forehead against the workstation as an alarm in the Control Room went off. This was how it had been for weeks. Every now and then he thought he would try and hope the Stargate would finally go through so they could find out what was happening on Luxima. Unfortunately, the necromancer was right. The Stargate was closed from the other end and wasn't likely to open any time soon.

"Sorry sir." Harriman apologized as Jack raised his head.

"It's okay, Will." He patted the sergeant on the back and got up, leaving the Control Room. Jack walked to his office and shut the door behind him. He stood by his desk, hands resting on it while he bent over it slightly. Something small and round caught his eye.

It was a stone. A sapphire actually. Perfectly rounded and smoothed.

Jack picked it up and rubbed his thumb over it. He remembered when Rose had given it to him a couple years ago as a gift. He had always been saying her eyes reminded him of sapphires. So she had given him one to remind him of her when she was gone. He was never in his office though. So he hardly ever saw the stone and even worse… he hardly had thought of her because of it.

Anger surged inside of him and he suddenly began throwing things from the desk. Pen holder hit the wall. Memo basket flew and hit the door. Jack kicked the chair so hard it left a streak of black along the wall.

"Jack?" A knock came from the door. Jack raced to it before whoever was behind it could open and see the mess he had made. He quickly opened it, slipped out and shut again before Daniel could see what had happened.

"Yes, Daniel?" Jack asked as sweetly as he could while blocking the door. He carefully slipped the sapphire that was still in his hand into his pocket. Daniel narrowed his eyes, sensing something was off, but decided to ignore it.

"Kelowna."

"Who?" Jack asked, thrown off by the name. He smacked his forehead lightly and nodded. "Right! Kelowna, the new planet. The meeting."

"Yeeeah…" Daniel drew out and observed Jack's face intently for a moment.

"Yes, Daniel?" Jack's voice took on a sardonic tone.

"Are you alright, Jack?" Daniel finally asked and crossed his arms over his chest, clasping the folders tightly to his body. "You seem a bit tense."

"I'm always tense."

"Not this tense." Daniel countered. The two entered a staring match, awaiting to see who would win. "Does it have to do with Rose?"

"…no." Jack had hesitated before answering and Daniel had seen the red flag. He nodded his head at Jack and scratched the back of his neck.

"She'll wake up Jack." Daniel, though unsure himself, offered the comfort. "I know she will. Dr. Frasier said all the signs are there to indicate it. It's all up to her now."

"Ha, yeah." Jack shut his mouth, worried about what other nonsense might escape if he didn't. "So, Kelowna huh? When are we leaving?"

Jack began to walk away down the hall and Daniel was quick to follow.

"Yes. We're scheduled to leave in an hour to meet with a Jonas Quinn." Daniel explained as he opened a file from the stack he carried. He offered it to Jack, but Jack shook his head and gently pushed it away. "Well, he's an adviser to the First Minister Valis."

"Interesting. When will we get to meet First Minister Valis?" Jack asked with mockery in his voice as they headed into the locker room to gear up.

"Well, hopefully if we make a good impression on Jonas, then he will pass it along to Valis." Daniel closed the file and set the stack down on a nearby bench as Jack opened his locker. Daniel followed suit and began to ready his things.

Jack had slipped away from his team for a quick moment and ran into Dr. Frasier on his way to the Infirmary. After a quick hello he scooted into the room and went to Rose's bedside. He sat down in the seat he had brought in weeks ago and leaned on his knees, hands clasped together.

"Have you found any signs of her yet?" He asked quietly and stared at the floor.

"I've found plenty of signs." Gaenor replied and slowly opened her eyes. "But none of which were the right signs."

"What do you mean?" Jack snapped and stood up. "It's been two months!"

"Quiet Jack." Gaenor chided him. He sat back down and looked towards the wall, shaking his head. "She's there. She's just _hiding_. Extremely well too, might I add."

Jack said nothing. He didn't know what to say anymore. Yelling at Gaenor wouldn't make her find Rose any faster and it didn't make himself feel any better. His right hand unconsciously went to his pocket and found the sapphire. He pulled it out and twirled it in his fingers.

"I remember when she gave that to you." Gaenor watched the sapphire in his hand. The light bounced off it, causing a faint blue glow to stretch across Jack's face. "It took her forever to find one."

"Not exactly readily available?" Jack looked to her from behind the stone. Gaenor gave a snort and shook her head, looking up at the ceiling.

"Not like on Earth. It's one of the hardest gems to find on Luxima." Gaenor looked down at her hands in her lap. Rose's hands. Rose's lap. The longer Rose was away the harder it was becoming for Gaenor to separate herself from the body. "She was so happy when she found that thing. Couldn't stop talking about it. Became really annoying."

Jack looked back down at the gem. He tapped his thumb against it and then wrapped his fist around it. He raised the fist, let his elbow rest on the armrest and placed his mouth to it to reside. He looked at Gaenor, just stared at her.

"Is it make believe time?" Gaenor asked, finally noticing his stare. Jack said nothing. Gaenor understood though. She settled herself into the bed and closed her eyes, drifting away into the white room of Rose's mind where she resided most of the days. Jack leaned forward after a few moments and placed a hand on Rose's.

"I don't know if you can hear me. Maybe you're not even in there anymore." Jack began slowly. Dr. Frasier stopped at the door with a clipboard in hand. She hugged it to her chest and just watched as Jack moved to the edge of his seat.

"We've been doing everything that we can from our end, Rosie. We can't figure a way to snap you out of whatever this is." He gave her hand a squeeze and closed his eyes for a brief moment to collect his thoughts. "We need you to do something from your end now. We need you to try your hardest. Okay? So… wake up."

He opened his eyes and looked at her peacefully sleeping face. He just watched her for a long time.

"She will wake up, Colonel O'Neil." Dr. Frasier stepped up behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "It's all up to her now."

Jack looked back at Rose and nodded his head.

"I know. It's just the matter of when that has me worried." He stood up from his seat and pushed his hands into his pants pockets. His right hand gripped the sapphire tightly, fingers going numb. He stopped by the door into the Infirmary and looked back at Rose as Dr. Frasier looked over all her vitals. He then turned away and headed down the hall towards the Control Room and the Stargate.

His team was already there and set to go. The gate was dialed and awaiting their departure. Jonas Quinn would be waiting for them on the other side to discuss business between Kelowna and Earth.

Jack looked around at his team and nodded to them, taking lead. He tried to think of nothing as he strode up the ramp to the Stargate, but the more he thought of nothing the more he thought of everything.

The sapphire in his pocket suddenly became heavy. It slowed him before the Stargate where he stared into the blue pool. Then he walked through.


	6. A Missing Piece

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Gaenor sat in the Infirmary as Dr. Frasier looked over Rose's vitals. She was growing tired of having to pretend that she was not there, able to speak, but it wasn't her body. It wasn't her life they were trying to preserve.

Finally Dr. Frasier left. Gaenor opened her eyes and watched her leave, sighing once she was alone again. She readjusted herself in the bed and stared up at the ceiling. She hadn't been able to get out of the bed. Between Dr. Frasier, the nurses and all the visitors, she couldn't without either having to explain who she was or pretend to be Rose.

"Rosaaaaaliiiiiina," Gaenor sang softly and looked about the room. She closed her eyes and drifted away from the conscious mind, slipping into an unconscious state. This was where she had originally hoped to find Rose; lost and confused on how to wake herself up in the blinding white room that was her mind. Instead, she had found a maze of twists and turns that she couldn't navigate. It was a good sign and a bad one. It meant that she was still there, somewhere, but where was the real problem.

Sure, Gaenor had traveled the maze alone while Rose was awake and living her life. It was still hard though. There were so many crevasses that she could be hiding in; so many memories. They played like one of Jack's movies that he had shown Rose one time when she visited. He had set up the briefing room with chairs and something called _popped corn_ and _coke_ for her to eat. That memory was here, somewhere. She had passed it twice the day before.

"Rosalina!" Gaenor called out as she walked further into Rose's mind. There was still a mind, which was good. It was all about finding the owner now and bringing her back to the surface.

Gaenor heard laughter somewhere ahead. She moved a bit quicker, rounding the turn and finding Rose as a small child. No older than four, playing in the mud with Avia. Gaenor stopped to watch for a moment as Avia wiped some mud onto Rose's cheek. The little girl giggled and tried to wipe it off, only to have rubbed more on.

"Rosalina!" Gaenor called out again and pushed through the memory. It disappeared in a whiff of smoke. Gaenor continued on, passing memories, each time Rose got older. New faces appeared. Old faces appeared. Happy times. Sad times.

"Rosalina!" Gaenor placed a hand to the wall of the maze. Her fingers dragged across it as she went further. "I know you are here! Somewhere!"

She heard nothing, but the echo of her own voice. She stopped and looked behind her before looking ahead once more.

"Let me help! Let me help like I did before!" Her pleas were answered with silence. Then suddenly, she could hear a whisper from behind. She turned around, but saw nothing. The whisper continued, growing softer and softer as it drifted away. Gaenor quickly followed it down another path of the maze. Slowly the maze began to change.

The walls turned into trees. The dirt became grass. An owl hooted somewhere in the distance. Still she followed the whisper.

"Rose?" She called out, but the whisper continued on. It led her further and further in the woods. Gaenor began to realize where she was. She stopped and placed a hand to a tree trunk. "We're back in the Forest."

The whisper disappeared, leaving her alone in the creation of Rose's design. The trees moaned and cracked. The owl continued its eerie chant.

 _Whooo_

 _Whooo_

"Rosalina!" Gaenor called out and began hiking, trying to figure out where she was being led. There was some significance to this place. Something other than the obvious. Rose had been here many times on missions as a Gunda with the Imperial Army. She had even been here as a child.

A giggle caused Gaenor to freeze in her tracks. Ahead was a girl, maybe six, in a classically white Luximan dress. Her golden hair was pulled into a single braid down her back, which was turned to Gaenor. She outstretched a hand towards the child, but the child suddenly stood and ran. Gaenor chased after her.

"Rosalina!" She yelled after her, trying to keep pace. The little girl giggled again to her right. She darted that way without hesitation. She caught sight of golden hair to her left. Again she followed. "Rosalina!"

She halted at the edge of a ravine. She teetered a moment, trying to keep herself from falling over the side. She could hear rushing waters and carefully looked over the edge to see the river flowing below. She searched in vain for any sign that Rose had fallen into the river, but could find none.

"This way!" A voice called out to her left as a wind picked up and the sky clouded over, rain in the near future. An elderly woman dressed in green with black inlays led a group of children, roughly between the ages of eight and twelve years old, down a path along the side of the ravine.

"What are you trying to show me…?" Gaenor breathed out and followed at their heels. The woman kept yelling for the children to keep up. They all seemed frightened and nervous. Where was this woman leading them?

When they reached the bottom, Gaenor found that there was a small bank to the river that one could walk along. The woman led the children in a single filed line, telling them to keep to the ravine wall.

Gaenor spotted Rose towards the front. She kept walking to the water and peering into its depths. She didn't seem afraid like the others were. Instead, she was curious. The woman grabbed her hand and pulled her to the front of the line behind her.

"I told you not to wander!" She scolded the young Rosalina, but it didn't bother her. She ignored the woman. Gaenor swore up and down that she knew her. She recognized her from somewhere.

"Miss Sabine?" One of the boys called up to their leader.

 _Sabine…_

Gaenor knew exactly who this was. It was one of the Elders who had sat on the Council years ago. She and Rose's mother had clashed several times when reforms came about to protect orphaned children in the White City. Gaenor had never known why, but it was quickly becoming clear why they could never agree on terms.

"Hold your questions till the end Ulliam!" Sabine called back while practically dragging Rose behind her.

"You're hurting me." Rose placed her other hand on Sabine's and tried to pry it off. Sabine ignored her pleas to be released and continued on. Gaenor followed closely and stopped as they approached a cave. She looked around at the landscape. Darker clouds were rolling in and thunder followed them. The wind rushed passed her like a breath and disappeared into the cave. Gaenor looked back to the children, but they were gone.

She stared at the cave entrance for a long moment. It was dark and she could see virtually nothing inside of it; hear nothing. She looked back up at the sky again, listening to the crack of the thunder, and then headed towards the cave. If Rose needed to show her, then into the cave she was going.

She stepped inside cautiously. Her eyes moved around slowly, trying to spot anything out of the ordinary. All of this was before she had ever come to Rose, had ever made the pact to reside in the recess of her mind. She didn't know what might be awaiting her in the darkness. It could be something horrible that Rose had suppressed. Probably was.

"I said no, Ulliam!" Sabine shouted somewhere in the darkness as a loud slap followed. "I'm sorry. Truly. They're usually much better behaved than this.

Gaenor could see a light up ahead. It wasn't a torch or a candle. It was an odd color, a greenish blue hue unlike anything she had seen.

"It is okay." The voice was strange. It sounded like a melding of several voices in one; deep, eerie. "They are but children and children do as they please."

"Thank you, my lady."

Gaenor came around a bend. Before her the children were lined up, side by side, with Sabine behind them. Gaenor walked up beside her and her eyes widened. Some kind of metal platform sat on the ground, a perfect circle. Above it, attached to the ceiling, was some strange orb emitting the strange glow she had seen moving through the cave.

"Hello children." The strange woman greeted them, smiling like a snake. Her eyes unexpectedly glowed a whitish shade. She was a Gou'ald. "My name is Nirrti."

She stepped out from behind some kind of control panel. Gaenor walked to it and looked it over. Several types of crystals resided in it of all shapes and sizes.

"Today we're going to do something very _special_." The way Nirrti said it caused Gaenor to turn her head from the panel and watch the snake as she paced before the children. "We're going to see which of you has potential to be **extraordinary**."

"And then what?" Gaenor recognized the small voice. It was Rose, standing on the end. The snake slithered towards her and knelt before her, placing a hand against her cheek.

"Then you will do something very important for me." As she started to pat Rose's cheek, Rose grabbed her hand and pushed it away.

"I don't like you very much." The sight of a ten year old Rosalina speaking to a Gou'ald this way made it impossible for Gaenor not to laugh.

"Well that's perfectly fine." Nirrti stood up, towering over Rose. "You don't have to like me. You just have to do as I say."

She spun on her heels and walked back to her panel. She moved some of the crystals around and then pointed to Rosalina with a slender finger.

"You," Nirrti pointed at Rose, "up on the stand."

Sabine came up behind Rose and began to usher her to the circular metal platform.

"But Miss Sabine, I don't want to." Rose argued and fought against the Elder.

"I don't care Rosalina. Get on the platform." Sabine forced her onto the platform and rose stayed, looking over the metal beneath her feet. Sabine backed away and went back to her position behind the other children. Gaenor saw something move in the darkness as two men with staffs stood towards the entrance to this part of the cave.

They were readying for the children to flee.

Gaenor looked to Nirrti beside her and watched carefully at what she did next. She moved more of the crystals and the gasp from Rose drew Gaenor's attention immediately. Rose stood with her eyes firmly shut, body rigid and face upturned towards the ceiling. Lights flashed around her, circling her.

"Hm, interesting." Nirrti's voice rose. She looked up from the panel at Rose as the lights fashioned themselves into a pattern. "Very interesting."

"It's her chemical makeup." Gaenor breathed out and stepped closer. She observed it and it spun and spun around Rose. She had learned about DNA and RNA and molecules from Major Carter. She had given her books about it with diagrams.

"Let's see what happens when I do this." Nirrti moved a crystal to a new spot and Rose screamed. The other children began to panic. Some cried while others just yelled. Nirrti continued to play around with the crystals… for hours.

Gaenor had resided herself to the side of the wall and had sat down beside Rose's twitching form. She could only watch the memory. Not interact with it. She finally had to close her eyes and not watch as Rose had withered and screamed in pain from the machine. She didn't know what Nirrti and those crystals had done to the eight year old, but she could feel that nothing good would come from it.

Finally, Nirrti had enough of playing around with the childrens' chemical makeup. She shut the machine down and the last child fell to the floor in a heap. The cave was quiet apart from the childrens' moans and twitching.

"Where are you?!" A voice screamed from the back of the cave. "I'll kill you if you've harmed her! Do you hear me, Sabine?!"

Nirrti's guards, the Jaffas, turned and prepared their staff weapons.

"Wait." Nirrti ordered them, raising a hand in a gesture to cease their original idea. A woman wearing a black cloak with blue inlays appeared. She had golden hair and sharp blue eyes like fresh cut sapphires. She grabbed Sabine by the throat with one hand. Sabine sputtered and grabbed at the hand, but was far too feeble in her old age to remove it. The woman's face was construed with rage, pure rage.

"Where is she?!" She screamed at the old woman on her hand. Sabine raised a crooked finger in Rose's direction. The golden haired woman's demeanor instantly changed. "Rosalina!"

She dropped Sabine on her ass and ran for her, skidding on her knees beside her. She placed a hand gently on Rose's cheek and whispered to her soft, comforting words that only a mother could.

"Celyna, you don't understand." Sabine coughed out and looked towards the younger woman. "This is for the best. For everyone."

"They're children!" Celyna spat back at her. "Defenseless children that you were supposed to protect from those like her!"

Celyna pointed an accusing finger at Nirrti.

"Nirrti will help them become remarkable!"

"Is that the lie she's fed you?" Tears burned Celyna's eyes and she glared at the other woman. Nirrti stepped out from behind the panel, hands clasped before her.

"It is no lie." She spoke calmly; diplomatically. She bent down, coming to eye level with Celyna. She nodded her head towards Rose. "Your daughter showed promise beyond belief. With my help she can reach her full potential."

"You cannot have her, you worthless insect." Celyna spat, seething with fury towards the snake. Nirrti stood up instantly and the Jaffas moved to either side of her, preparing their staff weapons once more. They aimed them at Celyna, who refused to move from her daughter's side.

"Move or I **will** kill you." Nirrti hissed, her eyes glowing to intimidate the woman. Sabine looked from Celyna to Nirrti and back. Sowly, Celyna stood straight, shoulders back and eyes harder than ever.

"Leave or I will kill **you**." She threatened back with. "We did away with your kind once and we can do it again. Do not test me."

Nirrti and Celyna continued their locked stare for a long while. Finally, Nirrti laughed and relaxed a bit, giving a small huff of defeat. She spoke something in a strange language to her guards. They moved to a small girl with dark brown hair and tan skin. One picked her up in his arms and looked to their leader.

"Your daughter will be mine one day." Nirrti hissed and nodded her head. "This isn't over."

"It is for now." Celyna hissed right back and watched as Nirrti left. She then looked back down at Rose, eyes softening as she stroked her hair on her head.

"That was our only chance!" Sabine shouted at the younger Elder with tears in her eyes. Celyna ignored her and continued to stroke Rose's hair, shushing her when she twitched and moaned. "Do you even realize what you have done?! You have doomed us!"

Celyna raised her gaze to the older woman. Her face was blank, but her eyes said it all.

"Damn you, Celyna." Sabine cursed while she shook her head and retreated. Celyna immediately went back to her daughter. Whispering and smiling down at her.

"I am so sorry, Rosie." She bent down and placed a kiss onto of her head. Tears sprang to her eyes once again. She sniffled and shut her eyes tightly as the tears began to fall.

"Celyna!" A deeper voice called from the cave.

"Over here! I've found them!" She yelled back and gathered Rose into her arms, laying her head to her shoulder. Uinseann appeared and was instantly taken aback at the sight.

"Oh good lord, no." He breathed out as his eyes scanned the children lying on the floor. His eyes went to Celyna and then to Rose in her arms. "Is she…?"

He couldn't bring himself to say it.

"She's breathing. They're all suffering from the same thing." She explained and looked at the other children. She knew them all, knew their parents. She closed her eyes once more and placed her chin on top of Rose's head.

"Oh Celyna…" Uinseann moved closer and knelt beside her. He placed a hand on Rose's arm and she twitched, moaning. He quickly retracted, afraid his touch had harmed her.

"It was a Gou'ald, Uin." Celyna met his gaze with worry etched across her face. He was about to ask if she were sure, but she laid it to rest. "Her eyes glowed. I saw them… She did something to the children with that machine."

"The other Elders are coming. I'm going after Sabine before she gets too far." Uinseann stood up and started to leave. Celyna caught his black and purple robes in a tight fist.

"What do I tell them happened?" Celyna's voice was broken as Rose moaned and wept in her arms. Uinseann looked back down at mother and child, seeing her plea not to be left alone. He bent down again and placed a hand to her cheek, thumb rubbing back and forth.

"Tell them the truth." Uinseann looked at Rose and then looked at the other children. "Tell them what Sabine's done. Tell them we must move the Stargate. We can't risk anything like this happening ever again."

Gaenor's eyes narrowed at the two Elders. She and Rose had been under the impression that they knew nothing of the Stargate. At least not until Rose had told them when she brought back Jack and Daniel with her to the White City.

Apparently, there was much more that the Elders had been trying to keep hidden and Gaenor wondered just how much of it Rose already knew. Even if she didn't remember it.


	7. Lethal Dose

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

The alarms screeched throughout Stargate Command. A wormhole blew through the ring and left the familiar blue puddle, rippling fiercely. Carter and Daniel stormed through first, followed by Jack and Teal'c at their heels.

"We need to get to the Infirmary." Carter explained to General Hammond, who stood at the end of the ramp awaiting them. She threw her pack to the ground and followed at Daniel's side. "Daniel's been exposed to radiation."

General Hammond looked back at the Control Room and pointed at Sergeant Harriman, "Have a medical team meet us on the way!"

Then he followed beside Jack into the hall.

"What happened, Colonel?" General Hammond asked from where he walked behind him and Teal'c. Jack shook his head.

"Not quite sure, sir. Details are a little sketchy." Jack replied and continued with a solemn face.

"We were not present at the time of the incident." Teal'c explained further, hands behind his back and face stern. Nurses appeared in the hall and went straight for Daniel, who yelled at them not to touch them.

"He could still be radioactive!" Carter called back to the nurses and followed Daniel, who continued in his path and walked into the Infirmary passed Dr. Frasier.

"Do we know what kind and how much?" She turned from the doorway and asked Major Carter.

"It was a device housing an unstable amount of Naquida. We think his right hand was exposed to at least eight to nine grades of neutron radiation resulting from direct contact. Full body exposure of over seven." Carter explained quickly as Dr. Frasier's eyes grew wide with fear.

"What is it?" General Hammond asked from behind Carter. She turned and looked at him with a face that conveyed both worry and fear.

"It's a lethal dose, sir." Carter confirmed, the hallway growing quiet.

In the Infirmary, Daniel sat down on the bed across from Rose's. He couldn't help but let his eyes wander to her as the nurses began to scrub him down. His body stung all over and he winced when one of the nurses took his hand and began to remove the dressing he had put around it.

"We need you to remove your clothes, Daniel." Dr. Frasier spoke as she tapped both the nurses on the shoulder. They walked away and removed their gloves carefully, disposing of them in the appropriate fashion. Daniel nodded and Dr. Frasier slowly walked away, following the nurses into another room to allow him some privacy.

Daniel carefully removed his uniform, letting it fall to the floor and dressed in the robe Dr. Frasier had left for him on the bed. He sat back down and pulled himself all the way back on the bed, staring across the room at Rose.

He wanted to say something. He wanted to speak to Rose. He knew he couldn't though. It was just Gaenor for now. Jack had told him so after each of his comings to the Infirmary to check on her that Rose still wasn't back yet.

One of the nurses came back in and collected his clothing. Disposing of it before walking back out of the room again. Daniel laid his head back on the pillow and just continued to watch Rose, asleep on her own bed.

"Knock, knock." A voice came from the door entering the Infirmary. Jack strode in with his hands in his pockets and a mixture of forced contentment and worry on his face. "So, how ya feeling?"

"First, I'm going to get nauseous. Then the nausea will be followed by tremors, convulsions and something called ataxia." Daniel started and sat up on the bed again, swinging his legs over the side to face Jack. "Surface tissue, brain tissue, and internal organs will inflame and degrade. I believe that's called necrosis. Now, based on the dose of radiation I got, all that will happen within the next ten to fifteen hours. And if I don't drown in my own blood and fluid first, I will bleed to death and there is no medical treatment to prevent that."

"Maybe not that _we_ know of." Jack breathed out, brain rushing to process everything that Daniel had just listed off. He pulled a chair closer and sat down, leaning an arm on the ECG machine. Jack opened his mouth to say something, but Daniel cut him off.

"We can't go running off to our allies every time someone's life is at stake and don't go telling me my life is any more valuable because it isn't." Daniel quickly but in.

"…what happened?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does."

The room grew quiet. Rose's ECG machine beeped away gently from across the room. Her eyes slowly opened, but they were not **her** eyes. These eyes were ice blue; Gaenor. She looked across the room at the two men and licked her dry lips.

"You didn't try to sabotage anything." Jack's voice was sharp, anger flaring. Daniel said nothing for a long moment and just stared at his friend. Gaenor could see why Rose felt so attached to these two Earth men. They were more than friends. They were family and they had included her in that family when she had gone AWOL, running away from a place she had never felt at home in.

"There was an accident." Daniel finally spoke up. He looked away from Jack and at the floor, shaking his head. "I guess the scientists figure the government would hold them responsible. I guess they figured it was easier to blame me."

"Cowards…" Gaenor couldn't help but let it slip passed Rose's lips. Jack and Daniel looked her way, neither holding a look of surprise at seeing her eyes burning from inside Rose's body.

"You're okay with this?" Jack asked and looked back at Daniel, who quickly shook his head.

"There's not much I can do about that now though." Daniel replied, his eyes never leaving Gaenor. Her eyes softened, realizing that something was very wrong.

"Yes, there is." Jack's voice was gentle.

"If they really want to blame me, denying it isn't going to change a thing." Daniel looked back at him finally and scratched beneath his nose. "10,000 years ago a Gou'ald tried the same experiments that they're trying and he nearly blew the planet to bits. I tried telling them that, but they wouldn't listen. They're going to build that bomb and nothing we say or do will stop them from it."

Gaenor turned her eyes away from them and stared at the ceiling. She closed her eyes and tried to reach out to Rose, hoping that maybe this, what was happening to Daniel and Jack, would pull her back. Kick her ass into high gear.

 _Rose, your friends need you. Can't you hear them? I know you can… Daniel is hurting and Jack is scared._

"She's still not responding?" Daniel's voice was soft. Gaenor opened her eyes again and looked over at him. Jack apparently had left while she had gone back into Rose's mind. Slowly she shook her head. She looked towards both doors that led into the Infirmary and then slowly sat up, swinging her legs over the side. She turned off the ECG and pulled off the monitors from her chest.

"What are you doing?" Daniel asked and narrowed his eyes. Gaenor took hold of the IV drip and stood up, walking towards Daniel with uneasy steps. She sat down on the bed beside him, legs too short to touch the floor from that height.

"I've tried Daniel. I've tried for weeks." She spoke softly and stared at his hands. She gently tapped her head. "She's in here. I can feel her, but I can't find her."

Daniel looked at Gaenor. He saw her and not Rose in those eyes. It was harder for Jack to understand who or what Gaenor was and the relationship between her and Rose. However, Daniel was a little more open to the idea. She had been a warrior that faced an untimely death centuries ago during a great battle. Unable to leave the planet and move on, she roamed it until she became something else; something not quite dead and not quite alive. An Alma, as the Luximans called them. Souls of protectors left behind because they're obligation was not fulfilled.

Gaenor had told him that she had come upon Rosalina in the Forest one night. She had heard the girl's cries and came to see what was wrong.

" _They took her!" Rose cried, dress filthy from the Forest floor and hair pulled this way and that. "They took my mother!"_

 _Gaenor sat down beside the girl, leaning back against a tree. Rose held something in her hands, a pendant of a blue stargazer lily. She looked to Gaenor, actually looked at her and not through her like everyone else did. This surprised the spirit._

" _You can see me…?" Gaenor had breathed out. Rose said nothing and only moved beside her, hiding her face in her shoulder. Gaenor wrapped her arms protectively around the girl and stared out into the Forest._

" _Shhh, little one. Everything will be alright." She whispered and laid her head upon the child's. "I will protect you."_

Something had happened that day. Gaenor found that more and more she couldn't travel farther than a few steps from Rose. Something had tied the two together, forcing them to be inseparable. Until one day, Gaenor and Rose became one.

"It's not your fault." Daniel watched Gaenor's pained expression. "It's whatever happened on Luxima before you two were thrown through the Stargate."

"I can't remember that either." Gaenor looked up at Daniel. He didn't know what to say. He wanted to comfort her, but at the same time he wanted her to have all the answers, to bring Rose back. "Rose and I… it has becoming harder to distinguish one from the other over the years."

"I'm sure. You two have shared the same body, same mind since she was eight." Daniel looked back at her, trying to hide the pain he was starting to feel from the radiation. "Twelve years is a long time to spend with someone day in and day out. It was bound to happen that you two would become more and more alike."

Gaenor nodded. Even though Daniel was the one in pain, and yes she could see it in his eyes, he was still trying to comfort her.

"Is there anything that I can do, Daniel?" She asked gently, looking at the sores on his hands again. "To help with all this?"

Daniel shook his head and looked down at his hands as well.

"I don't think there's anything anyone can do." He suddenly gave a short laugh and smiled gloomily at her. "Not unless you have some secret ability to heal."

Gaenor gave a sad smile in return, but shook her head. She closed her eyes and leaned her head on his shoulder, taking one of his hands in hers.

"I'm sorry." Her voice was so soft she wondered if he had heard her.

"Me too." He replied and closed his eyes. Heels clicked in the hallway. Gaenor quickly removed herself from Daniel's bed and hopped back into her own. Daniel motioned to the ECG machine to the side of her bed and she quickly hooked herself back up to it. She laid down, closed her eyes and waited.

"Gaenor?" Daniel called from across the room, eye shut as though he was chiding himself for what he was about to say. "There is something you can do for me."

Gaenor's eyes shot open. She looked over at him, waiting for what her orders were. Daniel licked his lips and opened one eyes to look back at her with.

"I don't have a whole lot of time left. Maybe just fifteen hours. If you could–" He started and faltered. There was more. Gaenor knew what it was he wanted already though. She gave him a small, reassuring smile.

"Find Rose so that you may have a chance to say goodbye." She confirmed as Daniel nodded his head slowly; grimly. "You two were close. All three of you were. I will find her, Daniel Jackson. For you."

"Thank you, Gaenor." Daniel meant it whole heartedly. There was a special bond between him, Jack and Rose. She had always come when they needed her to. She had been there when Sha're had been taken. She had stayed weeks after she was killed.

Daniel watched Gaenor as she laid her head back down on the pillow. She stared up at the ceiling a moment and then slowly her eyes closed, mind retreating into the maze once more. Dr. Frasier walked into the Infirmary with a clipboard in her hand. She looked between Daniel and Rose's sleeping form.

"Who were you talking to?" She asked finally and walked up to his bed.

"No one." Daniel replied and laced his hands together. Dr. Frasier watched him for a moment and then looked back at Rose. Her heartbeat was steady and her breathing was normal. She swore she had heard two voice talking in the room; Daniel's and Rose's. She shook it off though and attended to the issue at hand; Dr. Daniel Jackson.


	8. Dead Girl

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Gaenor sat in the maze alone with grey skies above. She was tired of running around in vain. It never seemed to get her anywhere. If Rose wanted to be found, then Gaenor would be waiting in her spot in the maze.

"'Tis the last rose of summer left blooming alone. All her lovely companions are faded and gone. No flower of her kindred, no rosebud is nigh. To reflect back her blushes and give sigh for sigh." Gaenor sang with her eyes closed. Her voice was soft and high pitched, reaching every note in a well-rehearsed fashion. "I'll not leave thee, thou lone one, to pine on the stem. Since the lovely are sleeping, go sleep thou with them. Thus kindly I scatter thy leaves o'er the bed. Where thy mates of the garden lie scentless and dead."

Gaenor's slowly opened as her voice drifted away. She could feel something in the maze with her. She looked around where she was at. Fog was rolling in from some source unknown and blew passed her, hiding the maze floor. She stood up and followed the fog as I spread farther and farther.

"So soon may I follow when friendships decay… and from love's shining circle the gems drop away." She continued to sing, but began walking in the direction the fog was going. It was odd. The feeling she got was both familiar and not. "When true hearts lie withered and fond ones are flown. Oh who would inhabit this bleak world alone? This bleak world alone…"

She stopped. She had been led to the center of the maze. The fog rolled over the ground and out another entrance back into the maze. In the middle of the center sat a large, barren oak tree. An old oak tree; tall and resolute. She approached slowly and placed a hand firmly against the thick trunk. It had a heartbeat.

She retracted her hand slowly and then looked around the center of the maze.

"Rosalina?" She called gently. She had been to the center of the maze before and nothing had been there. No tree, no fog; nothing. Gaenor shook her head. She could feel _something_ there with her. It had to be Rose, but where was she?

"Rose!" Gaenor raced around the other side of the tree and stared out where the fog had disappeared back into the maze. She could see nothing but grey walls and fog beneath a dark sky. She shook her head again and turned around, trying to spot anything.

She did.

Someone was curled into a tight ball beneath the oak with fog hovering around them. They were cloaked and hooded in white and blue. Gaenor couldn't make out a face. A mixture of tingles and prickles crawled over Gaenor's body as she approached. She knelt down beside them and looked them over. Her hand trembled as she outstretched it towards them, placing it on their arm.

They didn't stir.

Gaenor tightened her hold and turned them over. The fog covered their face. So she lifted their head, hood falling back to reveal golden hair and a pale complexion. Tears sprang to her eyes as she stared down upon Rose. She gathered her into her arms, cradling her head to her chest.

"I found you." She cried and rocked back and forth. She closed her eyes and hid her face in Rose's hair. "I've got you. You're safe now."

"…am I?" The voice startled Gaenor. She opened her eyes and stared down at the ground, not releasing Rose. Slowly she pulled back to see Rose's eyes open. They were the deep blue that she remembered, but something was very different. Rose's eyes glowed a whitish hue and Gaenor dropped her like she had been burned. She stumbled to her feet.

"No… it can't be." She breathed out and shook her head. Rose stood up straight and raised her chin. A smirk slithered onto her face.

"Yes." Rose's voice was not her own. It was a mixture of different voices; high and low pitched at the same time; soft and deep. "You're too late. I told her mother I would have her one day and now I do."

"No! Let her go!" Gaenor screamed. She knew that Nirrti couldn't really be there. It was impossible. Gaenor would have been able to feel a symbiote inside of Rose. This was something Rose's mind had cooked up. Some kind of protection or fear perhaps of what the future might hold in store for her.

Gaenor charged at Rose without restraint. If Rose wanted this to be real, then Gaenor would make it so. She swung her left fist, but Rose dodged with grace and pushed the hand away. Gaenor fell to the ground on her knees with her back to Rose.

"You couldn't save your own daughter. What makes you think you can save someone else's?" Rose spat and shook her head at Gaenor, who stared at the ground beneath her. The words cut straight through her. It was true. She had had a daughter. She couldn't save her from the fallout that war had brought between Luxima and their Gou'ald overlord. She had died in her arms. She wasn't about to let it happen again.

* * *

"What's happening?!" Dr. Frasier yelled as she barreled into the room. One of the nurses was beside Rose's bed while Jack stood on the other side. The ECG was beeping too quickly, showing signs of distress. Dr. Frasier looked Rose over and then watched the ECG a moment.

"She was screaming and then she just started to convulse." Jack explained and looked from Rose to Dr. Frasier. He didn't know what was happening exactly.

"No!" Rose screamed again and jerked again. Her head shook violently from left to right. "Leave her alone!"

Jack stared at her. He couldn't tell who is what that was screaming; Rose or Gaenor. Dr. Frasier yelled to one of the nurses and then held Rose down as she thrashed in the bed. Jack could hear his name being called, but he couldn't move.

"Colonel O'Neil! Please!" Dr. Frasier's voice broke through. Jack quickly pressed his hands onto Rose's shoulders, pinning her to the bed.

"Colonel!" Major Carter raced into the room with Teal'c at her heels. "We heard screaming. What's going on?"

"Teal'c grab her legs." Jack ordered. Teal'c moved passed Sam and took hold of Rose's legs. She trashed and fought an invisible enemy, screaming and crying. Sam walked over and stood off to the side, watching Rose.

"What's going on?" She asked in a breath and looked to Jack. He stared at Rose as if expecting her to answer the question.

"Nothing good." Jack replied finally, but never looked away. He watched as Rose's eyes darted left to right beneath their lids. Something was happening inside that head of hers. Gaenor had found something. He knew it.

* * *

Gaenor threw another punch at Rose, who blocked. A fist met a block. A kick was dodged. Too evenly matched. The two were like bolts of lightning; fists and legs flying. Gaenor fell to the ground from one of Rose's blocks. She swung around with her leg out and hit Rose, sending her backwards with her head hitting the ground hard. Gaenor ran and jumped, fist pulled back and prepared to strike. Rose rolled just as Gaenor hit, fist colliding with the ground.

Rose crouched like a wild cat on the maze floor several feet away. Her eyes narrowed and her jaw tightened as rage soared through her. She breathed hard, worn from the action.

Gaenor knelt on the ground where she had landed. Her heart was racing. Slowly she turned her head to look at Rose. Her ice blue eyes grew hard as her teeth gritted together.

The two stayed this way for what felt like a lifetime. Each waited for the other to make the first move. Thunder cracked overhead. A bolt of lightning streaking across the dark sky Rose had created in her mind.

"She's mine." Rose growled deep in her throat.

"Over my dead body." Gaenor seethed.

The two launched themselves, running at full speed. Each pulled back a fist as they hurled towards each other. They both released their strike.

Rose missed. Gaenor didn't.

Her fist met Rose's chest dead center.

* * *

"She flat lining!" Dr. Frasier called out suddenly as the ECG screeched. Jack's eyes went wide as his hands slid from Rose's shoulders. A nurse quickly pulled Rose's shirt up and charged the paddles as Teal'c released Rose's legs.

"Everybody clear!" Dr. Frasier yelled and shocked Rose's body. Jack stepped back till he hit the wall. He couldn't believe this was happening. It couldn't be. He couldn't lose two people.

"Again! Clear!" Dr. Frasier shock Rose once more, but the ECG continued to screech a flat line. Dr. Frasier froze for a brief second, but then snapped out of it. "Clear!"

Sam looked to Teal'c and then to Jack. She knew, they all knew, that there was some kind of special bond between Jack, Daniel and Rose. They all had shared the mission on Abydos and since then, they had been virtually inseparable. Despite Rose living on an entirely different planet.

"…3:17 PM." Dr. Frasier called it, handing the paddles to a nurse. Sam looked back at Jack, saw the look in his eyes as he watched Dr. Frasier cover Rose's face with the sheet. Jack stormed out of the room. No one followed him. There was nothing they could say to make the pain go away.

Sam looked to Dr. Frasier. No one said anything. Sam and Teal'c left as Dr. Frasier walked away to her office with the nurses in tow. She stopped at the door and looked back at the body lying beneath the white sheet. She felt tears spring to her eyes and turned away.

Jack had headed straight to Daniel, who lay wrapped from head to foot in bandages in the observation room. A chair sat by the bed, awaiting Jack. He collapsed into it and rubbed a hand over his forehead, eyes closed tightly.

"Jack?" Daniel' broken voice called to him from beneath the blinding light overhead. Jack looked at him from the fist that held his head up. "What's happened?"

"Daniel–" Jack struggled with how he wanted to phrase it. He leaned closer to Daniel's bed. He could see open sores all over Daniel's exposed face and lips. "Something's happened."

"Jack." Daniel called to him again. He could sense it was bad. Whatever Jack was about to tell him, it was really bad. Jack rested and elbow on the edge of Daniel's bed.

"It's Rosie, Daniel." Jack could barely say her name. He didn't need to say anything more though. Daniel knew. Somehow, deep inside, he knew. "She's gone."

Daniel's face contorted. Then his eyes slowly narrowed at Jack. Carefully he shook his head from side to side in protest. Jack licked his lips and nodded, seeing denial in Daniel's eyes.

"She gone, Daniel. I know you don't want to believe it, but she is." Jack tried to convince his other passing friend, but Daniel kept shaking his head. His eyes were locked on something behind Jack. It moved closer and closer with graceful steps, white skirt flowing and swaying. Translucent sleeves hung at the sides, leading down to slender hands with manicured nails. Daniel looked up into her deep, blue eyes.

"Rose..." Daniel breathed out as a small smile crossed his broken lips. Her pink lips curled into a warm smile of her own. She raised a hand and pushed some of her hair from her face, translucent sleeve brushing her smooth cheek.

"No, Daniel." Jack shook his head, thinking this was a delusion that Daniel's symptoms were creating. Rose winked at Daniel and then looked up at the window where General Hammond stood with a face that was unfamiliar to her. She smiled at them and bowed her head in greeting. General Hammond did the same, surprised to see a dead girl up and walking around. She placed a single finger to her lips, telling them to be quiet. It wasn't every day you got to sneak up on Colonel Jack O'Neil.

"You made it." Daniel's eyes reddened and watered. "Just in time."

"I wasn't going to miss this." Rose spoke softly as she walked to the other side of the bed. Jack's face went blank as he watched her sit down on the edge of the bed. "Gaenor wasn't going to let me."

Daniel gave a small smile and reached his bound hand towards hers. She took it in both hands and then looked to Jack. She gave another small head bow. Her hair golden hair glittered in the light of the medical lamp above Daniel's bed.

"Jack, would you mind terribly if I spoke to Daniel for just a moment alone?" She asked and looked back at Daniel. "There's something we need to discuss."

"Uh, yeah. Of… course." Jack slowly stood up and headed towards the door, looking back several times over his shoulder to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Rose looked back at Daniel and smiled again.

"Hi sleepy head." Daniel whispered, causing Rose to laugh.

"Hi." She replied, smiling stretching from ear to ear.

"They're laughing." General Hammond commented as Jack walked into the room above the observation room. They stared down at Daniel and Rose, both deep in conversation. It looked serious, but friendly by the way they smiled at each other.

"Yes, they are." Jack pushed his hands into his pockets.

"How is this possible? Dr. Frasier said she called time of death at 3:17." General Hammond looked to Jack, both ignoring the guest several feet away. He stood there with a box in hand, staring down at the woman sitting on the bed with Dr. Jackson. Daniel said something and her face erupted into a giant smile, laugh heard even behind the glass. What General Hammond had said didn't go over his head. He had heard it, but seeing someone who was pronounced dead up and laughing before him was... astonishing.

"I'm not sure. I was there when Frasier called it, sir." Jack looked back down at Rose and Daniel. One friend was being traded for the other. It was bitter-sweet. Jack looked to the visitor and felt a pang of fury rise up in him. "What are you doing here?"

The visitor turned and looked at him.

"You're commander was kind enough to grant my passage." He looked at Jack, who only stood waiting for more. He looked down at the box in his hands and then extended it towards the Colonel. "I brought this; naquadria. I took as much as I could."

Jack took the box and looked back at the man.

"Why?" He questioned.

"The data recorded during that accident demonstrated the power of that collected weapon unlike anything previously." His voice was soft and full of shame. He looked back down at Daniel and Rose, shaking his head. "I really don't know what was worse; seeing my colleges die in the manner they did or seeing the looks of utter glee on our leaders' faces when they were told the potential power of this weapon… they wanted to know when it could be _demonstrated_."

Jack and General Hammond looked to each other, sharing the same thought.

"I told them the truth about what happened." This caused both General Hammond and Jack to look at him in surprise. The visitor looked back down at Daniel again, pulled away into the memory of what had happened to cause the situation now. "I am ashamed… that they would not bring themselves to recognize Dr. Jackson's heroism. He saved millions of lives."

Jack looked back through the window. Rose was standing now, but she hadn't let go of Daniel's hand. Her smile never faltered. She never gazed at him with a sad eye because she knew they needed to be strong for Daniel. He was the one leaving them behind. Not them. Not today.

Jack looked down at the box, tapped his thumbs on it and then turned to General Hammond.

"Sir," Jack began and handed the box to him, "If it's alright I would very much like to spend some time with my friends before–"

He couldn't bring himself to say it. General Hammond took the box and nodded at him, releasing him for now. He and the visitor looked back out the window and watched Jack walk back into the room, saying something that made Rose and Daniel laugh. Rose grabbed a cup sitting to the side on a tray and plucked an ice chip from it, feeding it to Daniel. She sat down on the bed beside him again, her hip to his shoulder. Jack sat in the chair, leaning forward and telling some story that General Hammond was sure had involved the three of them together.

"They've been through a lot together, haven't they?" The visitor asked, not looking away from the three who sat there talking and laughing. General Hammond looked down at the box in his hands. It weighed heavier on his heart than in his arms. He looked back at the three as well, feeling the visitor's eyes on him.

"Yes, they have, Jonas Quinn."


	9. Goodbye Daniel

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

"Obviously they don't know that I'm here. I was lucky enough to be able to access our Stargate." Jonas Quinn looked out the briefing room window into the Gate Room where the gate sat silently with the iris drawn shut. He turned and looked to Jack and General Hammond. "If I'm caught returning to my planet I'll be considered a trader."

"What do you want?" Jack asked, not really caring for anything he had to say. As far as he was concerned, Jonas Quinn was just as much to blame for Daniel as any of the Kelownans. Perhaps even more so.

"I don't believe that my people will ever truly support a war that leads to any kind of mass destruction. Our leaders just don't see any viable alternative at the moment." Jonas tried to argue for his leaders, but then fell quiet once again. He took a quick glance at the Stargate and then looked to General Hammond. "Promise me, if you're able to develop defense technologies, such as these shields you spoke of, you'll share them with my government."

"Of course." General Hammond agreed. Jonas had after brought them naquadria illegally and was now a traitor to his own people. It was the least they could do at this point.

The alarms sounded suddenly. Red lights flashed. Sergeant Harriman's voice floated through Stargate Command on the speakers, "Unauthorized wormhole."

Jack looked to General Hammond and then hurried to the Gate Room, leaving Jonas alone in the briefing room. A man walked through the Stargate wearing strange clothing, but Jack knew precisely who it was.

"Jacob." Jack greeted. Jacob nodded his head at him and looked to General Hammond, nodding to him as well.

"I'm here to help any way I can."

* * *

Rose sat in a chair beside Daniel's bed, stroking his bandaged hand. She hadn't left since she surprised him and Jack. She hummed gently and the tune carried in the quiet room. Sam and Teal'c paced the floor anxiously, awaiting anything that may happen. Daniel was fading fast. He was no longer conscious and his breathing was slowing.

Movement in the hall caught their attention. Rose stood from her chair and watched as General Hammond, Jack and a man Rose did not recognize strolled in.

"Hey Sam." The strange man walked up to Sam and they embraced as though old friends. He pulled back and looked down at her. "I'm so sorry."

"Thanks dad." Sam looked down and then raised a device in her hand. She told him that it hadn't worked when she tried. It had sent Daniel into the state he was currently in. Sam's father looked it over and then shook his head, taking it from her.

"We'll do our best." He walked to Daniel's bedside, placing the device on one of his hands. He outstretched his hands over Daniel as an orange glow emitted from the machine. Rose had seen one of these used before by the SG-1 team. It was used to heal. She watched carefully as the glow spilled out from the device and then looked back to Daniel for any sign of a reaction.

"His condition is grave." The man's voice changed. It sounded as though there was more than one person inside of him. Like a Gou'ald. He pulled the device back and just stared down at Daniel. He then looked to Dr. Frasier beside Rose. "I do not know if I can save him and even if I can I do not believe I can restore his full healthy state."

Rose looked at the others for any sign of trouble. She didn't trust any Gou'ald. Even the Tok'ra were on the fence for her whether to trust or not. She decided not to fret, however, since they weren't.

"Do what you can." Sam placed a hand on his shoulder, urging him to try. Rose wanted to speak up, but she didn't. She looked to Daniel and squeezed his hand.

"This is your decision, Daniel…" Rose whispered, tears prickling her eyes. The man again raised the healing device over Daniel. The same orange glow emitted from it. The room was silent apart from the constant hum of the device. Rose looked to Jack towards the back and watched him. He seemed far away like he wasn't even in the room any longer.

"Jacob," Jack spoke up suddenly and the man holding the device halted. He turned and looked at Jack, questioning him. "Stop."

"Are you serious?" Jacob asked, disbelieving what he was hearing. Jack looked down at Rose, who met his saddening stare. She gave him a small smile and nodded her head once in agreement with Jack. They needed to stop. They had to let Daniel go… no matter how much they didn't want to.

"It's what he wants." Jack replied and looked back at Jacob. Everyone stared at him as though he were crazy. Dr. Frasier went wide eyed and Jacob looked to her.

"Someone else want to tell me what to do?" He asked her since she was the medical specialist. She opened her mouth but nothing came out.

"Just let him go." Jack spoke up again and looked back at Daniel. Rose closed her eyes, feeling the tears welling up. Jacob pulled his hands back and turned off the device. He looked at Sam with sad eyes and pulled her into a side hug, kissing her forehead. They all sat on pins and needles, listening to the ECG and Daniel's raspy breathing. Then, without warning, Daniel gave his last breath and the ECG ran flat.

Rose stared at Daniel as the others looked to each other for confirmation. Daniel's body started to glow a magnificent white as his soul lifted up into the air. He as ascending to a high plane of existence. Something he had wanted for a long time. Something he deserved.

Rose stood up, placed a kiss on his bandaged forehead and walked to Jack. She wrapped her arms around his middle and hid her face in his shirt. She gave him a squeeze and then released him, exiting the room.

She hurried down the hallway, vision blurred by the tears that stung her eyes. Her throat was becoming sore and tight. She sniffled and when she rounded a corner she bumped into someone. She hit the wall and her palms went flat against it to catch her. She looked to the man she had run into. It was the same man that had been with General Hammond when she had said her goodbyes to Daniel.

"I-I'm so sorry." She apologized quickly. This was the icing on the cake. Her breath was starting to hitch in her sore throat. Her mind was spinning. She knew shouldn't be so upset over it all. Daniel was in a better place, a much better place. One unlike that place she had gone when she had died.

"Hey, are you alright?" The man asked as his eyes narrowed at her, noticing her distress. He placed a hand on her arm to perhaps offer some kind of comfort. She was unsure. She shook her head and tried to say that she shouldn't be so sad, that everything was okay. However, when tears began to stream down her face he took it another way. She placed a hand over her mouth to muffle her sobs and slowly slid down the wall to the cold, hard cement floor. She cried into her left hand, eyes squeezed shut to try and stop her tears.

"Hey, hey, hey," The man quickly knelt before her and placed his hands on her upper arms. She held her free hand to his elbow, unable to calm herself down. "It's alright. Uh, my name's Jonas; Jonas Quinn. What's yours?"

"R-Ros–" She fought to speak coherently. She was too overwhelmed. "Rosalina..."

"Okay, okay Rosalina." Jonas struggled with what to do. It wasn't every day that a beautiful crying woman bumped into him in a hallway. Jonas tried to console her, having no idea really what he was doing. Her hand squeezed his elbow. She looked him in the eyes; deep blue irises glowing against her irritated and red sclera. He couldn't look away. Her gaze was so sad, so heart breaking that it kept him locked in place.

She dropped her hand from her mouth and then placed it on his shoulder. It was as though she was trying to hold on to anything or else she too might disappear. She closed her eyes again and bowed her head, crying softly.

"Is it Dr. Jackson?" Jonas asked carefully. Rose said nothing, but nodded her head vigorously and looked back at him again. He looked away from her for only a moment. He felt shocked by the news. He knew it was coming and soon, but still...

"He's gone. There was n-nothing I could do to help." She choked out, trying to gasp for air. She leaned forward and laid her forehead on his should, hands never moving from their places on his elbow and opposite shoulder. His arms hung loosely outwards with the uncertainty of what he should do in this situation. "He's gone, Jonas Quinn."

At the use of his name his body relaxed and he gently wrapped his arms around her. If she hadn't been crying he probably would have blushed at having a woman in his arms.

"Rosie!" Jack called out down the hall and jogged to her when he spotted who was with her. She pulled back from Jonas and looked up at him with red eyes. New tears were beginning to form. Jack pulled her from Jonas and helped her to stand.

"Jack…" Rose cried, eyes closing once again. She collapsed into his arms and sobbed into his shirt, gripping it for dear life. Jack let out a long, heavy sigh and wrapped his arms around her. He placed his chin on the top of her head and looked up at the ceiling,

"I know, I know." He breathed out and smoothed her hair. His arms tightened around her. "It's going to be alright. He's in a much better place. You know that."

Rose said nothing. She could only cry and release all the emotions she was feeling. Jack looked to Jonas with a stare full of mixed feeling. Both grateful Jonas had been kind to her, but also distaste for everything he had done. Rose trembled in his arms and Jonas looked away, the stare too much for him.

"Excuse me." Jonas excused himself and headed down the hallway, looking back over his shoulder several times as he went.

"Rose, it's okay." Jack tried to calm her down, but she was struggling to. Jack suddenly became aware that something else might be going on with the young woman. "It's not just Daniel, is it?"

"It's everything, Jack…" She pulled herself back from his shirt and looked up at him. Tears fell to the floor and left small puddles. She began to calm down. She shook her head and closed her eyes, pulling herself together. "Gaenor is gone."

"What do you mean she's gone?" Jack was surprised; utterly surprised. His face conveyed this. "Where the Hell could she go?"

Rose shook her head.

"She's left me all alone and now I cannot go home either." Rose began to feel tears prickle her eyes again. Her throat ached so harshly as she swallowed and her cheeks hurt. Jack stared down at her. There was nothing he could say to make things better. Today had just been too much; for everyone.

Rose threw herself into his arms again. Her hold on him was tight, desperately trying to cling to something, anything familiar. Jack wrapped his arms tight around her as well. Their trio or rather their quartet was no more. They both had lost someone very close to them today, both living and not. While Jack was in pain, he could only imagine Rose's. At least he had gotten to say goodbye to Daniel the moment before he left.


	10. Closing Doors

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

~One Month After Daniel's Death~

Sam, Teal'c and General Hammond watched as the two continued to go back and forth. It had been going on for an hour. Just back and forth. Jack would ask a dumb question and Rose would snap a reply back at him. It had been amusing, at first, and was quickly seeming to become a pattern between the two.

"I told you this already, Jack!" Rose exclaimed as she sat at the table in the briefing room. She pushed around a pencil as Jack laced his hands and placed them on the table top. He leaned forward.

"Well, tell me _again_. Why can't we dial Luxima?" Jack asked yet again as Rose flicked the pencil away and leaned closer towards him. A few more inches and their noses would have touched.

"I DON'T KNOW." Rose elongated each syllable hoping that perhaps it might sink in this time. She and Jack had been on tense terms for a few days now. Things had been fine. Jack had given her space. Allowed her time to pull herself together. Now, however, he felt that they needed answers about everything that had transpired well before Daniel had gotten sick. Really, he was looking for a distraction and Rose was it.

"Okay, what was the _research_ you were doing?" Jack asked again as Rose leaned back in her seat. She shook her head, jaw tight. She was beginning to seethe. The only reason he knew she had been _researching_ anything was because of Gaenor, who wasn't hanging around anymore. That was a whole other issue that Jack cornered her about when they were alone. At least he had that much decency.

"What happened before that necromancer threw you like a sack of potatoes through the Stargate?" Jack was also growing heated as no new information arose. He just needed something, anything, to distract him. "What are you hiding?!"

"Spirits damn you, Jack O'Neil! I don't know anything! I can't remember!" Rose pushed herself back from the table and stormed off, not bothering to ask to be excused. Jack threw a pencil towards the door she left through and then fell back against his seat. The others stared at him, unsure of whether to speak or not.

"What?!" Jack snapped, looking from Teal'c to Sam. Neither said anything and only looked to the other. Teal'c turned back to Jack first, face as serious as ever.

"Perhaps she truly does not know anything, O'Neil." He suggested calmly. "Her story has not changed since she has awoken."

"That's another thing." Jack suddenly remembered and slammed a hand down on the table, causing Sam to jump. "How in the Hell did she wake up? She was dead! We all saw it."

No one knew how to answer that either. They had seen many things through their travels across the universe. Never before though had they seen someone come back to life quite like that. It was unsettling.

"She has to know something!" Jack snapped, arms flailing. He leaned forward on the table again with his arms stretched out before him. "There's gotta be something."

"You believe she's lying to us?" General Hammond asked, making his presence known. "You really think she'd do that after everything?"

Jack turned and looked at him, remembering that he was the one who called this meeting in the first place.

"I wouldn't say it like that, sir." Jack started, anger beginning to deflate under the stare of his commanding General. "I don't think she would intentionally lie or hide something from us. Not unless she was more concerned with protecting us. Sir."

"Protecting us from what, Jack?" General Hammond placed his laced hands on top of a folder that sat before him.

"Perhaps the evocatorem." Teal'c offered, looking from General Hammond to Jack.

"Yeah, that guy!" Jack butted in and pointed at Teal'c, swiveling back and forth in his chair. Teal'c looked back at General Hammond to continue.

"O'Neil did say that Rosalina appeared to be afraid of this evocatorem when she awoke in the Gate Room that day. Perhaps she worries that if she informs us who they are and what happened before entering the Stargate that we too may be in some kind of danger."

Jack stared at Teal'c, mouth open and ready to argue, but he couldn't. It was a very good assumption.

"If this, evo-cat-orem, is a threat, then we need to know it. We need to know what we might be up against when or if we can ever get Rose back home again, Till then, Jack," General Hammond stated with a stern look, "she's your responsibility. Maybe consider being a little friendlier to her seeing as we aren't getting anythin' out of her unless she decides to share."

General Hammond stood up, collected his folder and then headed into his office. Jack watched him go and then shook his head, leaning forward on the table again. He suddenly stood up and then heatedly walked out of the room.

"Sir," Sam called after him and followed him down the hall. Jack looked to her and then faced forward again, "If she is suffering from some kind of memory loss, then pushing her isn't going to help. It may make things worse."

"You're point?" Jack didn't particularly care at the moment. He just wanted answers… and someone to argue with. Sam grabbed his arm to stop him short. He looked at her hand and then at her in surprise.

"Sorry sir." Sam apologized and stood a little straighter. "Rose died. Not once, but twice according to what she's told us."

"Annnnd?"

"And, sir, she was brought back to life; twice."

"Carter if there's a point, make it."

"My point, sir, is that people change from things like that. They die and come back. Suddenly, they have a whole new outlook on life. Sometimes they retreat into themselves." Jack raised an eyebrow at Sam. She was beginning to lose him again. "Maybe in Rose's case, dying and coming back was just too much for her and to protect her, her mind forced the memories into her sub-consciousness."

"Okay, say that is what's going on." Jack pulled out a hand and held it between them with the palm down. "Will her memory ever come back?"

"It might. It might not, sir." Sam's voice had an odd undertone. Jack had caught it.

"Buuuuuut…?" Jack asked, pushing his hands into his pants pockets. Sam gave a small dejected laugh.

"But… sir, if there was something, let's say 'bad,' that happened and her mind was protecting her from that, it could all come back gradually or all at once. If it came back gradually she could work through it, but if it came back in one swoop, then Rose could be worse off."

"How so?"

"She could become mentally unstable, sir. She could potentially, for lack of a better term, lose her mind."

"Like the lady that stands behind the 7-11 talking to the 'demons' that want to use her body for evil?" Jack asked, mockery in his tone.

"Yes, sir, or even worse." Sam was trying to convince him. Rose was a sweet girl and Sam did believe that she remembered nothing of what happened. Jack nodded his head and then began to walk away again. Sam had made a good point just as Teal'c had.

* * *

Rose had stormed down the hall, grumbling under her breath. She knew that this was Jack's way of coping with what had happened to Daniel, but she had enough. She didn't know anything. She didn't remember what happened before coming through the Stargate. She remembered nothing while she had been unconscious. All she did remember was dying; the darkness, the bitter cold.

She knew people were watching her. They were whispering about her. She had listened to whispers like these her whole life on Luxima. Why should she care about some damned Tau'ris then?

Rose stopped at the elevator and impatiently pressed the down button. She knew there was a group of soldiers behind her by a hallway, staring at her, burning holes into her back. She could hear them talking about her.

"Who does she think she is?" A man asked, looking at the others in his group. "Disrespecting Colonel O'Neil, talking back?"

"She's so smug. Thinks we're all nothing special." Another man commented. "Like her planet's the only one in the universe."

"She's a spoiled little princess on a strange, alien planet." A woman laughed, making the men laugh as well. "It's no wonder her own people didn't want her."

Something inside Rose hurt. Her eyes became blurry as she fought the will to cry. She blinked the tears away and pressed the button again, hard. Suddenly the door opened. She quickly walked in, pressed the button for the floor she wanted and ignored the group still laughing at her. They stared at her as she stared at them, doors closing.

The doors closed. She was separated from them. She pressed her tongue hard against her teeth, trying to keep from releasing a cry. Her eyes burned again, but she stood straighter with her shoulders back. She swallowed the soreness in her throat away the best she could, but it wasn't enough.

"They're wrong, you know." A voice came from the back of the elevator. Rose hadn't even noticed anyone else when she had answered. She had just wanted to escape the taunting. She looked over her left and saw Jonas Quinn leaning in the corner, a folder at his side. Rose said nothing and looked back at the closed doors.

The elevator stopped, but it wasn't the floor she wanted. She stepped to the side and allowed other onto the elevator, pressing her back against the opposite corner of Jonas. Their eyes met; sapphire met stormy blue and locked in a silent conversation. The elevator dinged and the doors opened. Rose rushed out in a brisk walk without looking back.

Somewhere inside her she wished Jonas had followed her. She wished someone had, that someone would just be… a friend. She was all alone. Jack at her throat. Daniel dead. Gaenor vanished. It was her and four walls that were beginning to close in around her.

"I miss you, Daniel…" Rose mumbled as she rounded a corner. She headed further and then stopped before a door. She opened it, letting the knob drift from her fingers. The light from the hall left a path into the room, but also left so much darkness. The light extended to the far wall ahead and hit a picture frame on the night stand.

It was a blue stargazer lily, pressed and forever preserved behind glass. Avia had done it for her a few years ago. So, that when she came to visit Earth she wouldn't miss home too much. So, that she could feel at home there, at Stargate Command with him and Jack. She would have a part of it no matter where the Stargate took her.

Rose looked down at the floor and then reached out for the knob again, closing the door once more. She didn't drop it though. She just stared at her hand on the knob. Tears made trails down her cheeks, falling to the floor.

She heard boot falls and looked, hoping to see Jack. The two soldiers walked passed her without even a look her way. Rose looked up at the ceiling and took a deep breath, sighing heavily; sadly. She felt cold.

"I don't know how things work on Luxima, but here," a hand took hold of hers and twisted the knob to open the door, "not all the doors are automatic."

Rose looked to her right and stared at Jonas Quinn. He looked at her with a goofy smile, folder in hand and at his side. Rose looked back at the room and spotted the lily again. Jonas peeked around the doorway and spotted it on the nightstand. He looked back at Rose and questioned what was wrong.

"I can't go in." Rose breathed out, forgetting Jonas was there beside her.

"Why not?" He knitted his eyebrows together and looked between her and the room again. Rose said nothing. She couldn't say it because she didn't understand herself.

Was it the lily? The memories? …the darkness that engulfed the room, holding them both locked away inside?

"Okay," Jonas began and reached for the doorknob. "The best thing about these doors is that you can close them and open them again later."

He shut the door and looked back at Rose with a comforting smile.

"Wanna grab some lunch? I was on my way to the cafeteria. I'd love the company." Jonas opened his arms to his sides and gave a boastful smirk. He lowered his arms and then extended a hand to her. Rose look at it and blinked. She blinked again and then again. She shook her head, questioning him silently. She suddenly stopped.

Hadn't this been what she asked for? A friend? Here was someone, hand literally extended for her to take in friendship, and she was questioning it; questioning him. She knew very little of Jonas Quinn other than Jack resented him because of Daniel's death. She had never heard an ill word cross Daniel's lips though. In fact, Daniel had never mentioned Jonas at all.

"Come on, Rosalina. Say yes." Jonas tried to hold back a grin, bouncing from foot to foot eagerly. Rose found it hard to deny her lips from forming a small smile. In a strange way, Jonas reminded her of Daniel.

"…yes." Rose took his hand and allowed him to lead the way a few step before letting go. She looked back over her shoulder at the door to her room and gave a small huff of a laugh. She looked forward again and bit her bottom lip, shaking her head.

"What? Did I say something?" Jonas asked and looked to her.

"Just something Daniel used to say to me." She shook her head at him and licked her lips at the memory.

"Oh yeah? What was it?" Jonas asked and opened the door to the cafeteria, holding it for her. She stopped and stared at the door, laughing again. She brushed her teeth back and forth over her bottom lips in an attempt to keep herself from laughing insistently. "You gonna tell me or am I gonna have to guess?"

Rose looked back at Jonas and began to laugh wholeheartedly for a long, long moment. She walked through the doorway with Jonas following close behind her.

"What are you laughing at?" Jonas asked again. Rose looked to him, her gaze the happiest he had seen since she sat at Daniel's bedside laughing with him.

"Anything could happen, Jonas Quinn." Rose smiled at him so warmly he thought he might melt into a pool at her feet, "Anything could happen."

 _"When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us."_

 _\- Alexander Graham Bell_


	11. Vivaldi

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

~Three Months After Daniel's Death~

Music echoed in the hall as Rose walked along, trying to clear her head. She held a book in her hand and marked the page she was on with a finger. She followed the music and found that it was coming from Daniel's office. It was Vivaldi. She remembered when Daniel had sat her down at his desk, placing on her head the most ridiculous headgear that she had ever seen. From it though, came the most beautiful music she had ever heard.

Rose stopped at the doorway into Daniel's office where all the lights were turned on. She leaned against the doorway, resting her head to it as she stared at the desk. The television was on the Weather Channel, but the sound was turned off. She slowly entered and looked at everything left behind. Her fingers trailed the filing cabinets, the bookcases, touching photos and ripped out pages from books.

She made her way to the desk and sat down on the stool. She pulled the headgear from their place in the drawer and gently placed them on her head. She plugged them in and pressed the spongie cups tight to her ears. A smile crept across her lips as the music raced to her brain. She closed her eyes and turned up the volume. She leaned forward and placed her elbows on the desk when her arms become tired from holding the earpieces.

Jonas skidded to a stop at the doorway with a stack of notebooks beneath his arm. He looked back out in the hall, head turning left and right as if he expected to see someone else. He watched Rose at the desk, hands cupping her ears. Her hair was free from any bands or braids, flowing over her shoulder and down to the middle of her back. She wore a pair of tight tanned pants and a white peasant top held in place by a white dress corset that had a strap that went around the back of her neck. Boots covered her feet and stretched just below her knees.

Jonas couldn't help but notice. Besides it being a very strange outfit, much different from what women wore on both Earth and his own planet, it was both feminine and strapping. It reminded him of something the Earthlings called 'steampunk.'

"Uh hello." He moved closer when he realized she had headphones on. He set the stack down on the counter in the middle of the office and slowly approached Rose. He gently tapped her on the shoulder so his presence wouldn't frighten her, but of course it did. Rose jumped up, stool crashing to the cement floor as she jerked from the desk, but was caught by the headphones on her head.

"Let me help." Jonas was quick and took hold of the headphones. He gently lifted them from her head and then picked up the stool.

"Oh I'm so sorry, Jonas." Rose apologized and fixed her hair, tucking some behind her ears. "I'm always making a fool of myself around you."

"Hey, no worries. I make a fool of myself all the time." Jonas laughed as he held the headphones in his hands. He noticed something and cocked his head with a smile, pointing to one of his ears. Rose didn't understand and knitted her eyebrows together in confusion. "You're ears are pierced. I never realized."

"Oh!" Rose's hand instinctively went to her ear and touched the earrings. "Yes, you get them when you are initiated into a special branch of the Imperial Army."

"Special branch?" Jonas asked and unplugged the headphones before setting them down on the desk. "Oh you mean the–"

Jonas snapped his fingers and searched for the term in his head. He smiled and pointed a finger at her when he had gotten it, "Gunda. You were a female warrior."

"Uh yeah…" Rose looked away, continuing to play with her ear. Jonas, sensing her resistance, moved to another topic.

"You like Antonio Vivaldi?" He moved to the counter where he had set the stack of notebooks. He picked them up and moved them to the other side, sitting down on a tall stool. Rose looked down at the stereo and then nodded her head with a smile.

"Daniel showed it to me when I first came to Stargate Command." She looked over at Jonas and moved to the counter. Her fingers trailed over some of Daniel's old notes.

"You two were close." Jonas stated, already knowing that they had been. But he wondered about just how close? He had felt Sam and Teal'c out about it, but neither of them could really say for sure one way or the other. "I mean, it was pretty obvious you two had known each other a while. Had too of grown pretty close then."

"In my line of work, I can honestly say that there are few I can consider friends. Daniel is one of them; a true friend. I trusted him with everything. I met him and Jack about six years ago on a planet named Abydos." Rose explained and opened one of Daniel's notebooks. Her fingers touched the indents in the paper where Daniel had written.

"I read the mission report."

At this Rose looked across the counter at him with surprise, "Really? Why?"

"It seemed like a good idea. I read all of SG-1's reports." Jonas nodded and the motioned a finger to the room around them. "And besides, I've got nothing else better to do since I'm stuck here."

Jonas stood up and walked to one of the filing cabinets. Rose watched him as he searched through countless folders.

"You and me both." She whispered and looked away from him. He stopped and looked over his shoulder at her. He hadn't really believed she was stuck until that moment. He heard the crestfallen tone in her voice. She too was stuck on Earth, at Stargate Command. The only difference was he had chosen to be there and he could choose to go back. Granted, there was a big incentive to _not_ going back, like being deemed a traitor, but he could still **choose** to go back. Both of those choices had been taken from Rose by someone she claimed she couldn't even remember.

Jonas went back to his search in the filing cabinet.

"Ah ha!" Jonas pulled out a blue folder and opened it to make sure it was the right one. He then shut the cabinet again and stroked up beside her, placing it on the counter. He looked through it quickly again. "Daniel wrote that you celebrated your twentieth birthday there."

Jonas looked up from the report and smiled at Rose.

"You're very odd. Do you know that?" Rose spoke with a straight face and narrowed eyes. She couldn't seem to quite figure him out. She had run into him a couple of times, not having many places to hide in Stargate Command. They had never really spoken though. Not like they were.

"I'm sorry…?" Jonas seemed taken aback by what she had said and was unsure of how to proceed. Rose's eyes went why as she tried to back track.

"I meant that in a good way. I swear. I just–" She fell short and pursed her lips. "I'm not very good at times with people I don't really know. I apologize. I blame my upbringing, but it's really just my personality."

"No worries." Jonas' face erupted into a grin. "I like your personality. It's… spunky."

"Spunky?" Rose gave a small laugh and smile in return. Jonas shrugged and then nodded, slipping through some pictures that were in the folder. She thought the word over in her mind and then decided that it was good. She looked down at the pictures and then to him from the corner of her eye, questioning why he was staring at her.

"Is there something wrong?" She asked finally, watching Jonas shake his head with the grin still lingering on his face. He looked down at the pictures once more.

"So Ra, huh?" Jonas asked and looked back at her. She licked her lips and nodded her head. Jonas turned his body towards her and leaned sideways against the counter, elbow hold up his weight as well as the stool beneath him. "Mission report only tells someone so much."

"Are you asking me to tell you personally about my experiences, Jonas Quinn?" Rose gave a small laugh and pulled a stool from behind her to sit down on.

"Jonas. You sound too much like Teal'c when you call me by my full name." He corrected her, eyes expressing his dislike.

"Okay, sorry, but at least people can remember your full name." Rose laughed. "Mine is about three names too long. Makes me sound like royalty or something, which I'm not."

"I'm very curious." Jonas began again. Rose was hoping to escape reliving the past for one day. She was more concerned with the future and whatever it held for her. "I've never left my planet before I came here. I'm more interested in everything out there in the universe, then files and mission reports that just recount events."

"You want to know how they felt instead of what they ate or saw." Rose knew the feeling. She had been on a sort of probation when she first became a Gunda. She had wanted nothing more than to go to arms and fight a battle with the women she had trained with for so long. Rose smiled at him. "You want an adventure of your own."

"Exactly! So, why did you go to Abydos?" Jonas asked and leaned in closer as if she was about to tell him a dark secret. At this, Rose laughed wholeheartedly. Her eyes seemed to sparkle from the light as they squinted, cheeks rising as she laughed again.

"It was purely an accident. I wouldn't have cared where I went to. I just wanted to leave." Rose looked back at the pictures and found one of the pyramid where the Stargate was held on Abydos. She touched it gently, remembering her first time stepping out of the Stargate.

"Why?"

"Why what?" She looked back at Jonas with confusion.

"Why did you want to leave? I've read the report on Luxima and it seemed like a nice place." Jonas was so naive.

"Looks can be deceiving." Rose looked around the room and then looked back at the file. She closed it and pushed it back from the edge of the counter. "Luxima wasn't the problem. It was the people. Mainly the Elders, who seemed to have strove to torment me any way possible. So, eventually I couldn't take any more and I went AWOL."

"What's that?" Jonas asked as he knitted his eyebrows together and shook his head.

"Absent without official leave. I basically… ran away in the heat of battle." Rose looked to Jonas, expecting him to be disappointed or express a look that would tell her she should be ashamed. Instead, he sat there smiling like some kind of sweet buffoon. Rose shook her head and sighed, scratching the back of her head. "If you've read the file, then you know all about the Elders and the things they did or rather, didn't do."

Jonas nodded, but said nothing.

"What the file doesn't say, is that at that time, I was in line to becoming one of them. My mother had been one and I had been fighting and fighting it, but the Elders made my life so miserable that I practically was forced into the office. So today, I hold the Seventh Seat as Elvira; the Impartial Judge." Rose pulled her hair over to one shoulder, twisting it so that it might stay in place.

"So the seats run by lineage."

"Yes and no. It is preferred that the same bloodlines keep a seat in Council. However, that isn't always the case. The High Elder, Uinseann, doesn't actually hold a bloodline to the Council. He was voted in during a time of war, which is extremely rare."

"Interesting."

"I have no respect for the Elders. Especially the ones that hold office with me currently. So, during that the time, I thought it perfectly rational to run from the Imperial Army and my station as a Gunda and find an adventure elsewhere through the Stargate. A new beginning of sorts. Did **not** turn out that way."

"You may not believe it, but I sort of understand how you felt then." Jonas motioned towards the file and then looked back at her.

"I know, Jonas." Rose was slow to jump in. Her smile was gone and replaced with sympathy.

"You do…?" Jonas seemed surprised and almost afraid of this. Rose nodded her head and looked down at her hands in her lap.

"Jack talks about it." Rose admitted and looked back at him. "A lot."

Jonas had been in a similar spot; he had been placed in a tricky situation, pitted between two difficult choices and had to choose. Rose actually felt that his decision had been harder than her own. She had acted like a spoiled brat and simply ran away from a tough decision. Jonas had been stuck between a rock and a hard place.

"He doesn't like me very much, does he?"

"Give him time. He'll come around. Always does." Rose halted to think and then bobbed her head a little. "Well, sometimes anyway."

"So why don't you like the Elders?" Jonas quickly changed the topic.

"Absolute power corrupts absolutely." Rose recited a phrase Jack had told her a long time ago when they had discussed the Elders and their decisions. "The Elders abused their power like anyone in any office and now that I am an Elder, I am even more ashamed and disgusted by them. Maybe it's because of my upbringing or my time as a Gunda, but–"

She couldn't exactly word it correctly. She clicked her teeth and shook her head, unable to pinpoint what she was trying to say. Jonas just watched, allowing her time to think and then caught it.

"You thought you could make a difference." Jonas leaned forward and placed a hand on her knee. "You still can."

"You're right. I **thought** I could make a difference." Rose closed her eyes and shook her head, feeling the weight of Jonas' hand like a conviction on her heart. "Turns out though that I can't do a damned thing. Especially not from here."

Rose looked around the room and shook her head again. Her hair swayed with the motion like stream of golden waves. She placed an elbow on the counter and covered her mouth by her hand. She stared out blankly with Jonas just watching her. His hand never left her knee as he just let her work through whatever was going on in her head.

"I don't even know what's going on back there." She started and looked back to him. "I have no idea what's happening. They could be in an all-out war. They could have been completely eradicated and I would have no way of knowing."

"So, let's figure out why we can't lock in the seventh chevron." Jonas sat back and looked at her as though it was the easiest solution in the world.

"How?" Rose was a little pointed without meaning to be. It didn't slow Jonas down a bit though. He ran a hand over his mouth and quickly looked around Daniel's office. He spotted something and looked back at Rose with a smirk, pointing a finger at a notebook sitting on a bookcase. He quickly retrieved it and began flipping through the worn pages. Rose just watched him utterly confused by what he was thinking.


	12. Everything Will By Okay

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

It had been a few days since Rose had seen Jonas. He had been all about helping her figure out why the last chevron wouldn't lock. He had read non-stop through Daniel's journal and notebooks, searching for any answer he could find. However, then SG-1 had needed hieroglyph translations and Jonas seemed the only capable party to complete the task. So, Rose was placed on the back burner.

She had taken up searching through Daniel's notebooks for clues on her own, but it was hard. Some things she just didn't understand and other times it just simply felt like an invasion of his privacy. These were his personal notebooks, his thoughts, feelings. Most times Rose could only read a few lines before needing to put the notebook away. It was all too personal.

She walked through the halls wearing a very Tau'ri outfit that Sam had given her; dark blue jeans and a pink short-sleeved V-neck. Rose had refused to give up her boots though. They had been a gift from Avia on her last birthday. She headed into the elevator and then stepped off when the door opened, heading towards the briefing room.

Jack, Sam, Teal'c, and General Hammond were already sitting down. Rose took the open spot on the General's right. Everyone had a folder before them except for her. They were all suspiciously quiet. It made her nervous. Her eyes glanced in Sam's direction and she only smiled, hands placed one on top of the other on the table before her.

"What's going on?" Rose asked carefully and look from General Hammond to Jack for an answer.

"You've accompanied the Sg-1 team many times on past missions. Helped us rid the galaxy of Apophis." General Hammond spoke up first and leaned on the table in her direction. She was unsure of what was going through his head. General Hammond smile to help reassure her. "We were hoping you would accompany them again just as before. Maybe even a little more permanently this time around."

She looked around the table at them all. Sam was smiling. Teal'c smiled and bowed his head in her direction. Jack just stared at her from across the table with no expression visible on his face to comfort her. SG-1 one had gone through several people already, trying to fill a gap that had been left behind.

Rose began to panic.

"I-I can't." Rose quickly shook her head vigorously. She looked back at General Hammond and shook her head again. "I can't take Daniel's place. Please don't ask me to."

"We're not… You're not." Jack assured her with a quiet voice. She met his stare and found that it held no anger or disillusionment. He was stating what she needed to hear. Sam looked to the Colonel as if he had said something heartless, but it wasn't. Rose was afraid they were trying to replace Daniel with her. She had already felt as though she had invaded his personal space. She couldn't take his place on SG-1. She didn't want to and neither did they.

"No one could replace Daniel." Jack looked away from her and leaned back into his seat, staring at his hands in his lap. "That's not what we're asking."

"I am very confused." Rose breathed out and looked around the table for some sense of normalcy. "I don't understand what it **is** that you're asking of me."

"Well, Rose," General Hammond spoke up and gained her full attention, "We want you to take _your_ place with SG-1 again. No one is replacing anyone. You're just –"

General Hammond struggled with how he wanted to word it.

"Picking up where you left off." Jack finished for him and stared across the table at her again. "It's what Daniel would have wanted."

"It's what we all want." Sam gave her a small smile as if to tell her that they all had decided on it, not just that they felt they had to because that's what Daniel would have done. Give her something to do. Give her a reason.

"Well?" General Hammond asked and Rose looked to him. "Will you accept?"

Rose gave a soft snort and looked down at the table. She remembered the year she had spent at the SGC when Sha're had been taken. How could she forget that? She had left her people for a whole year in the hands of the other Elders, whom she didn't trust. For a whole year she was a member of the SG-1 team and had fought alongside Daniel and Jack to retrieve Sha're. For a whole year she had helped in trying to put an end to the Gou'ald, Apophis. They had succeeded and she had left.

"Rose?" Jack called to her gently. "Rosalina?"

She blinked and looked across the table at him. So much had happened since she was a part of SG-1 years ago. Before she had been a naïve girl, who wanted nothing more than to go off on some adventure and lose herself in it. That's exactly what she had done. She had forgotten all about her people that year; all about responsibility; about her past. But, she wasn't that same girl anymore. She was an Elder now. She couldn't forget her people or her responsibilities to them. She couldn't just forget the past.

"The harsh truth, Rose, is that," General Hammond began and looked down at his laced hands on top of the table, "we just may **never** be able to open the Stargate on Luxima. You may have to accept the fact that you might be living out your life on Earth or perhaps another planet if that is what you choose to do. Now…"

Rose had stopped listening to General Hammond. Or at least had just stopped hearing him. His lips moved, but none of what he was saying reached her. She stared wide eyes at him, her heart beating fast and chest aching. She swallowed hard, trying to push the truth down, deep within her. Everyone had been tiptoeing around the subject for weeks now. Jack had continuously tried to get the Stargate to go through for her. Every week he and Sergeant Harriman had attempted to dial out without Rose knowing because every time it failed. He didn't want to give her false hope. None of them did. But now it was time for the truth.

"Rosie," the nickname shot through her like a knife. Her eyes met Jack's gaze across the table again. He leaned forward on the table, almost as though he was trying to reach for her. Finally she saw sympathy and comfort in his eyes. He looked at her with the same paternal nature as he had before everything had happened. "If we can't get you home, you have a place here with us; with SG-1. We're not just going to forget about you."

"Colonel O'Neil is right, Rosalina Levana." Teal'c stared at her for a long moment with a soft smile on his lips. "You are our friend."

Rose felt something lift from her shoulders. A weight that had been pushing down on her since Daniel had passed, suddenly lifted from her. She had always been closest with Jack and Daniel. Daniel had always kept in contact, asked how she was, asked if there was anything he or Jack could do. When he passed, Stargate Command felt more like a prison than a home to her. He was the brother she never had and Jack was the father that was always absent. They had filled two holes in her heart.

"Okay." Rose answered and nodded her head. Her gaze never left Jack's. She nodded again, a little surer of what she was doing. "Okay… Let's pick up where I left off."

"Now don't think we've given up on getting you home." General Hammond patted her arm and stood up from the table. "Jonas told me the other day that he's been working on a solution."

"Jonas?" The cynicism in Jack's voice stung Rose for some reason. She didn't understand Jack's aversion to Jonas. She had asked, many times, but he could never really give her a direct answer. She knew Jonas had some role in what happened to Daniel. That was a very clear sentiment around the SG-1 team. Something had happened while they had been in Kelowna, Jonas' home, between Daniel and him. Jack refused to tell her though and it was starting to bother her.

"Despite your personal feelings towards him, Jack," General Hammond addressed Colonel O'Neil directly. "Jonas Quinn is a very bright young man who has taken it upon himself to try and fill some very big shoes."

"Shoes he helped in emptying!" Jack suddenly slammed his hands on the table and stood up. The two shared a staring contest. Neither was willing to back down. The tension was so thick that Rose thought she might suffocate.

"What exactly did Jonas do?" Rose asked gently, looking around at the four. Sam looked away from her, rubbing a hand over the back of her neck. Jack looked down at the table, radiating his anger.

"There was an incident we were not present to." Sam spoke up. Rose turned and looked to her. "They were trying to develop a weapon using an unstable radioactive variation of naquada called naquadria."

"It was an accident." Teal'c broke in. Rose turned her chair slightly to look at him. "The scientists, including Jonas Quinn, figured the government would hold them responsible so they found it easier to blame Daniel Jackson, claiming he tried to sabotage their research."

"They were all incompetent cowards that tried to tarnish Daniel's name!" Jack snapped and fell back into his seat. "Jonas knew, that cowardly bastard, but he just wouldn't tell the truth."

Rose said nothing for a long moment. She understood now why Jack had such a grudge. Besides the fact that, yes, Jonas had been frightened to tell the truth, Jack was feeling guilt. Rose could see it now. It wasn't anger towards Jonas. It was towards himself and he had been lashing out at anyone he could. If he had been there, he believed, he could have stopped Daniel; saved him.

"But Jonas _did_ tell the truth, Jack." Rose narrowed her eyes at him in question. "He's here at Stargate Command. You haven't arrested him on any charges."

"He can't go home because he stole naquadria, Rose. They would arrest him as a traitor." Sam explained and glanced her way.

"Coward." Jack growled under his breath.

"Stop calling him that." Rose snapped back suddenly. It was time for them all to grow up; her included. "Did he personally intend for Daniel to die, become sick?"

"No-"

"Did he not tell the truth at some point?"

"Yes, but–"

"Jonas **stole** precious material from his own _government_ , his own _people_." Rose was becoming more and more heated. "He risked his own well-being to bring the naquadria to Earth, to **you** , and is now deemed a traitor by Kelowna and her people; his colleagues, his friends."

"Yes, but Rose–"

"How then can you sit there, so high and mighty, and continue to call him coward?" Rose shook her head at Jack. This was the difference between Daniel and him. Daniel saw the good. Jack saw only the bad. "Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we _think_ of it; the tree is the **real** thing; Abraham Lincoln."

"Don't do that." Jack shook his head at her. He understood now why her people had wanted her as the Impartial Judge. She was good. She spoke well, demanded full attention, even keep her emotions from everywhere except her eyes, but most of all, she had very good points to make.

"Those were the exact words you said to me when I was trying to avoid going back to Luxima." Rose pointed two fingers at him in judgement. "Jonas came clean. He stood up to his government and stood on your side. For that, he can never return home. Yet you continue to treat him as the sole cause for Daniel's death."

"Why are you defending him?!" Jack shot up from his seat again. He knew why. He just didn't like it. Rose slowly stood from her seat, straight and full of confidence. She silently faced off with Jack, whom she was not afraid of. She held no anger, no malice, just truth.

"Because Daniel would want me to." She answered sternly as though it was the most obvious answer. She slowly shook her head at him. She was a little disappointed that Jack had learned nothing from Daniel. "He didn't blame Jonas for what happened to him. Why should we? Who are we to pass judgement?"

No one said anything more. The frightened girl, who was so worried and afraid about going home moments before was now replaced by Elder Elvira of the Council of the White City and she was a force to be reckoned with.

Rose looked to General Hammond and gave a small bow. She exited the room and headed down the hallway. She had every intention of going to her room, feeling able to finally tolerate the memories that laid in wait for her, but instead she found herself at Daniel's–

No, it was _Jonas'_ office.

She peeked into the room and watched the fish swimming in the hexagonal fish tank on the counter. Ever so slowly Jonas had been changing things around, making the space his own. The artifacts that had swarmed Daniel's desk were no longer present on Jonas'. Pictures and cut outs no longer hung from the filing cabinets. Books no longer sat in large stacks on the floor. The chaos that Daniel had preferred to work in was replaced with order. It was both upsetting and relieving at the same time.

Jonas sat at his desk in the corner. The pencil in his hand was pushed against his temple with the eraser as he read through some notebook she was sure he had found while cleaning his office. She approached slowly, quietly and sat down at the counter so that she wouldn't disturb him. The stools had even been replaced with tall swiveling chairs in green and blue.

She watched him for a long moment. He chewed on his bottom lip as his eyes glided over the words on the pages. He took the pencil from his temple and twirled it, scribbling something on a yellow notepad. He was so focused on his work, just as Daniel had been.

He wore a fitted standard issue field drag t-shirt with tactical pants. It was much different from the clothing she had first seen him wearing; red heavy over shirt with a long sleeved white shirt beneath. It had looked uncomfortable and bulky. She much preferred what he wore now and he had also gotten his hair cut. The long buzz suited him better as well.

"You look very dashing in the Tau'ri clothing, Jonas Quinn." She spoke up finally and looked back at the fish in front of her. She couldn't tell what kind they were. Jonas startled and dropped his pencil. He looked over at her, unaware she had been sitting there or for how long.

"Uh," he was trying to think of what she had said, "thanks. I think. Hey, why do you call them Tau'ri?"

"That is what Teal'c calls them and he is not from this planet either." Rose tapped on the glass of the tank, trying to earn the attention of one of the fish. Jonas watched her a moment, curious as to why she was there in the first place.

"Was there something you needed?" He finally asked. "Not that I mind you being here or anything. I was just curious. Normally you don't sneak in here. It's usually more of a show."

She turned to him and shook her head with a small smile on her pink lips.

"No, I didn't need anything. I just…" she began and sighed, licking her lips. "Would it be okay if I just sat in here for a little while?"

Jonas looked away for a moment as though he was quickly thinking it over and then nodded his head. He looked back at her, "Of course."

Rose smiled and slid off the chair. She moved to a small graphing table where Jonas had mover the television and stereo to. She sat down in the chair and picked up the headphones, placing them on her head. She clicked the on button and gave a half smile to no one.

"Hey, Rose?" Jonas called, his eyes never having left her. She looked to him, pulled the headphones down and rested them around her neck. "Is everything okay? You seem… odd."

Rose gave a small laugh. It was not so long ago that she had called him the same thing.

"No, Jonas. Nothing is okay." Rose answered as her eyes met his. She smiled encouragingly. "But it will be. Give it some time."

Jonas gave a look of acceptance and nodded his head, turning back to his work. Rose turned back to the stereo and pulled the headphones on again. Jonas looked to his left at her and watched her; eyes closed, hands on the earpieces, smile on her lips. It was strange, but it was not unwelcomed.


	13. Back In Action

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

"Dial the gate! Dial now!" Jack called out with Captain Hagman at his side, aiding him through the terrain with his bum knee. Sam and Teal'c stood waiting at the Stargate, caught off guard by their sudden return. They were currently on P2X374, trying to discover whether the natives were friendly or hostile. It appeared they were hostile by the wound on Jack's right leg.

"Dial the damn gate!" Jack called out again more heatedly, seeing Sam's hesitation. Sam quickly raced to the control panel and began dialing as Teal'c raised his staff weapon in preparation for battle. He shot out at several natives that were peaking the hill.

"Where is Rosalina Levana?" He asked as Jack hobbled by with the help of Captain Hagman.

"She's right behind us." Jack waved a hand to where he had come. Rose appeared over the hill, racing down it. "Her and that damn warrior outfit."

Her clothing was what Jack had deemed _inappropriate_ for the situation; brown buckle boots, black campaigner leggings, black peasant top with a sapphire blue satin faux corset. Her hair was pulled up into a tight bun with several small braids decorating it. To her and her people, this was perfectly appropriate for this situation and actually required for an Upper Gunda. It was the approved dress; functional in combat yet still proper for a meeting.

She raced up to where the others stood and looked back at the natives who followed in hot pursuit. This mission had been a disaster. A total train wreck in her eyes. She looked at Jack's leg, shaking her head and then met his gaze. Again she shook her head. She had told Jack not to bring the Captain along, that there was someone else more worthy and capable. He hadn't wanted to listen though. So instead he paid the price.

The Stargate came to life and they all raced through, heading back to Stargate Command. Once there Rose and Teal'c aided Jack in walking down the ramp. A spear shot through the gate after them, barely making it passed the iris. It soared passed Rose, nicking her left upper arm and ripping her shirt. She hissed, but didn't flinch or fall from helping Jack.

"Good thing we're already heading to the Infirmary." Jack grumbled as Teal'c and she led him down the hallway.

"Just shut up." She grumbled back and shook her head. "I told you, Jonas would have been a better choice.

"Oh shut up." Jack shot back as they helped him hobble down the hall to the Infirmary.

* * *

Rose had walked away from the Infirmary with nothing more than a cleaning and a bandage. Jack, on the other hand, wouldn't be walking right for a while. He had suffered partial ligament damage in his right knee because Hagman had gotten a few translations wrong, mistaking 'peace pipe' for something that obviously had meant 'let me carve your leg.' Jack wasn't happy to say the least and Rose was frustrated that he was unwilling to give Jonas a chance. She felt he deserved it.

"Rose!" Sam called from down the hallway. Rose looked over her shoulder and slowed down so she could catch up. "How's your arm?"

"It's fine." Rose rubbed a hand over the dressing peeking through her ripped shirt and smiled. "Jack's the one you should be asking after."

"He'll live."

"It could have been worse." Rose ceased her stride and turned to Sam in the hall. They both stared at each other, Rose's expression serious. "I could have been much worse. Captain Hagman was not suited for the mission. If the situation had been different, he could have gotten someone killed."

Sam nodded her head.

"Jack's vendetta against Jonas is not only juvenile, but unreasonable."

"How so?"

"Sam," Rose began. Her expression grew softer. "He's upset with Daniel, but Jonas is the only one from the whole incident that he can blame."

"I don't think–" Sam began and stopped herself. She had meant to sat that Colonel O'Neill would never act like that, but past experiences said otherwise.

"Daniel once gave me a book of Tau'ri quotes. I just remembered one. It went, 'Circumstances cause people to act a certain way. It's from those circumstances that a person's attitude is affected followed by weakening of character. Not the reverse. If we had no faults of our own, we should not take so much pleasure in noticing those in others and judging their lives as either black or white, good or bad. We all live our lives in shades of gray.'"

Same looked at Rose, understanding exactly what she was getting at.

"Don't you feel that we all deserve a chance at redemption?" Rose's voice was soft, her eyes seeming to plead to Sam's good nature. "Even Jonas Quinn?"

"I suppose you're right." Sam nodded, agreeing with her. They both stood eye to eye, height's equally matched. "I can't get Colonel O'Neill to change his mind though."

"And I have tried. Many times…" Rose shook her head and began walking once more with Sam at her side. They walked in silence for a long moment before an idea occurred to her.

"Where are you heading anyway?" Sam asked as a mischievous smile began on her lips. "It wouldn't be to see a certain Kelownan, would it?"

"Yes, why?" Rose had no idea what Sam was getting at. She was on her way to see Jonas. None of the others ever went to him unless they needed his help. Rose actually enjoyed his company. Both of them had found something in the other that they could not get with anyone else on the base. They were both stuck on Earth, unable to return home and neither knew what was happening with their people.

"Oh no reason." Sam's smile never left as the two walked in silence the rest of the way to Jonas' office. The stereo played Vivaldi's Autumn as the National Weather Channel listed the forecast for the week. Boxes resided in a corner with the U.S.A.E stamp on their side and stacked three high. Jonas sat at the counter, deep into his research for the SG-1 team on Babylonian translations. The headphones sat around his neck, pen positioned snuggly atop one ear as he popped a green grape into his mouth.

The two walked in. Well, Rose walked in. Sam meandered a bit at the doorway. It had been a while since she had stepped foot into Daniel's old office. Rose walked to the fish and picked up the bottle of food, shaking it to get Jonas' attention. He looked up and shook his head; a signal they had developed silently for asking if the other had fed the fish yet.

"Hey, Jonas." Sam spoke up as Rose dropped a few flakes into the water. She had learned that they were fantail goldfish. They were pretty enough with their orange and white and their fancy fins.

"Major." Jonas greeted simply and leaned away from the book he had his nose within. "How's Colonel O'Neill?"

"Partially torn ligament in his knee. He'll be okay though." Sam replied and walked closer to the counter. Rose sat down and pulled the book Jonas had been looking through closer.

"What language is this again?" Rose knew he had told her already. She just couldn't seem to remember it though. The markings were so strange, so foreign.

"Babylonian." Jonas replied, glancing back at her. She nodded her head without returning the look. "And Captain Hagman?"

"Found unfit for active duty." Rose answered, nose firmly in the book. She couldn't understand any of the words, but she liked to try anyways. "Otherwise he's fine. Resting from the primitive tranquilizer dart he was struck with."

"How many does that make now?" Jonas turned in his seat and looked at Sam fully.

"Eight." Rose piped up again, holding up eight finger to emphasize.

"Nine." Sam interjected, earning Rose's stare. "If you count the two hours Captain Mathieson lasted."

Rose rolled her eyes and passed the book back to Jonas. He took it and flipped through several pages.

"So, there's no need for me to be going through Ancient Babylonian." He closed the book and pushed it away. Rose could hear the dejected tone in his voice. He was good at hiding his emotions, especially the ones men seemed to believe would make them seem weak. He had a habit of covering it up with smiles. She had learned to notice the signs though. She wished she hadn't. It only made her sad.

"Not exactly." Sam tapped her fingers on the book a moment, looking away from Jonas. She looked to Rose, seeing her subtly nodding her head towards Jonas. She then mouthed at the older woman, _'ask him.'_

"Do you think you could spare a few hours?" Sam asked, looking back at Joans.

"What for?" He asked as he removed the headphones from around his neck and pulled the pen from his ear.

"Field trip." Rose smiled at him.

"Really?" Jonas spun and looked between the two women excitedly.

"Uh, yeah. Kinda." Sam admitted with a smile of her own at Jonas' enthusiasm. "You've been here over three months and General Hammond thought you might finally want to leave the base for a while."

"Yes! **That** would be _great_." Jonas picked up several books from the counter and moved them to another table, opening up space. "Where are we going?"

"Nevada."

"Oh, clear blue skies. 73 degrees." Jonas smiled and turned the television off. Rose gave a small laugh and shook her head. He was such a… what was it Jack sometimes called him? A _nerd_.

"There are at least five hundred other stations." Sam looked between him and the television.

"Even I tried to tell him that." Rose mumbled and leaned an arm on the counter. She didn't watch television. She found it uninteresting other than the moving images. She preferred the movies Jack used to show her. Jonas stopped at the counter beside her and gave her a light, playful smack with the rolled up magazine he held in his hand.

"But this one is fantastic. You have all of your weather from all over your planet right there. Even a long range forecast. It's like predicting the future." Jonas grinned and tapped the magazine against his hand. Rose shook her head and gave a small snort of a laugh once more. A nerd indeed.

"Aren't you curious as to what's in Nevada?" Rose interrupted the silence and looked up at Jonas. Their arms gently grazed each other as she turned in her seat. Sam noticed. Jonas looked down at her and nodded his head, looking back at Sam.

"Do you like surprises?" The mischievous smile was back on Sam's lips again.

"Sure, I love 'em." Jonas replied and walked over to where his messenger back sat. He slid the magazine inside and clipped the bag closed. Sam bounced her eyebrows up and down, smiling lingering and then turned towards the doorway. "Hey Major?"

Sam looked back at him to find him pointing between himself and her. Rose knitted her eyebrows together in confusion.

"How do I know what color to wear?" His question made Rose and Sam both laugh, leaving Jonas to search for an answer between the two of them. Sam walked out of the room and headed down the hallway.

"Rose, you're coming too!" Sam called out, her voice echoing through the halls. Jonas turned to Rose, who only shook her head and laughed again.

"You gonna tell me?" Jonas pointed the previous question at her.

"They call each other." Rose finally relinquished. She laid her arms on the counted before her, leaning against the edge of it.

"They don't call you?" Jonas asked as he picked up his messenger back and shrugged it onto one shoulder. Rose pushed herself back from the counter and motioned to what she herself was wearing.

"They do. I just choose not to wear what they wear." Her answer was simple and short. She stood from the counter and pushed in her seat.

"I can see that."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Whether Jonas had known it or not, Rose had picked up on the undertone. To her it sounded scornful, but he hadn't meant it that way at all.

"I just meant that you don't wear 'Tau'ri' clothing."

'I'm not a Tau'ri." Again she responded simply. She wasn't quite understanding what Jonas was getting at.

"But you'e o' the team."means we should all match?"d? picked up on the undertone. To her it sounded ed herself back from the counter and re on the team." Jonas tried to stress his point as he moved closer. Rose narrowed her eyes in pure confusion.

"And that means I should dress as a Tau'ri warrior?"

And there it was; the source of the misunderstanding. Jonas closed his eyes and shook his head, giving a small laugh.

"No," Jonas ran a hand over his mouth. He realized that, having been a Gunda, to her that just because she was a warrior on someone else's team didn't mean her uniform changed. Just her perspectives. Jonas stared at her a moment, seeing the confusion turn to bewilderment. "Of course not. You're a Gunda. You should dress as one."

"My outfit is the proper uniform for a warrior of my status." Rose looked down at herself and tugged gently at the lose corset around her waist. She looked off to the side and then met Jonas' gaze slowly. She narrowed her eyes in question. "Do you think I should I be wearing Tau'ri clothing?"

She was having trouble assimilating. Jonas, despite having less experience with Earth than she, had seemed to have done it seamlessly. That was not the case though. He had seen it as that Earth was his new home now. He could never go back to Kelowna. So, why hold on to something he could never have again? Thus, he changed himself; his clothes, his hair, even some mannerisms. He guessed that Rose had never needed to do such a thing before. Her stays had never been so… permanent as they were now leaning towards. She was questioning whether or not she should forego what differentiated her as Luximan and instead appear more _Earthling_. Especially, if Earth was to be her new home.

"No, Rose. I think you should wear what makes you, you." Jonas shook his head at her and placed a hand on her arm. She squeezed one eyes shut in a brief moment of pain and Jonas quickly retracted his hand. "Are you hurt?"

"Coming through the gate one of the natives on P2X374 threw a spear and it made it through the Stargate as the iris was closing." Rose placed a hand over the bandage peeking through her shirt. "It was just a nick."

"Did they make sure it wasn't carrying anything? Like a toxin?" Jonas asked and looked at her arm as though trying to see the wounds through both shirt and dressing. "Who knows what might have been on it."

"You didn't read all of the profile reports." Rose suddenly surmised and stared up at him, he was a good three or four inches taller than her, but his size never intimidated her.

"What do you mean?" Jonas knitted his eyebrows together at her. Now it was his turn to be puzzled.

"If you had, then you would know." Rose's lips curled into a playful smirk. Things were about to get fun, she thought as she chewed on her bottom lip. She patted his chest playfully as she walked passed him. "Well, you said that you love surprises."

"You can't just not tell me!" He called after her as she headed out into the hall. Jonas collapsed into the swivel chair and looked at the clutter that laid there. He knew exactly what she had been talking about, at least the part about the profile reports. He had read through everyone's profile report on the team, except for hers. Hers had been missing. When he had inquired about it, the records manager had simply told him that it had been checked out to Daniel Jackson and never returned. So, he checked Daniel's office three times and the file had never shown up. He thought it strange, but until it did pop up there was nothing he could do. He would just have to wait till either he found the file or Rose fessed up to whatever it was she had been hinting at.

"Come on Jonas!" Rose called from the hallway, her boots slapping against the cement floor. She poked her head back into the room with a smile on her lips. "Don't want to keep Jack waiting."

Jonas quickly followed after her through the hallway to where the SG-1 Team was awaiting the two of them at the entrance to the base. Two jeeps sat running behind them.

"'Bout damn time." Jack called out and limped around the jeep to the passenger side, opening the door.

"Sorry." Rose piped up before Jonas had a chance to. She didn't mind enduring the wrath of Jack O'.Neill. She could handle him. "I was running my mouth. If Jonas hadn't stopped me, we probably wouldn't have gotten here when we did."

Jonas opened the door for Sam, who thanked him and hopped inside. She slid all the way over so Rose could get in. Jonas met Rose's look and mouthed a thank you to her for taking the blame. She nodded and looked through the driver's seat window passed the driver and at Jack.

"You getting in?" Jack's tone was playful yet mocking. She shook her head, hair firmly contained in the bun at the back of her head.

"I'm going to ride in the other one with Teal'c." She smiled at him and walked towards the other jeep. Jonas stood by the door he still held open and watched her. She stopped by the back of the jeep Jack and Sam were in and looked back at Jonas. "Go ahead. Get in."

"I can't take your seat." He stated, hand still holding onto the door. He was very uncomfortable with this arrangement. If anything he had expected to be sitting in the second jeep alone.

"The strong, silent types are riding in the second jeep." She gave a small laugh, one arm behind her back, holding the other at the elbow. Jonas looked at the jeep door he held and then shut it.

"So, lead the way." He outstretched a hand for her to go ahead of him. Sam watched as Rose and Jonas shared a look before they walked away to the other jeep. Sam was having a tough time controlling the smile growing on her lips and had to look out her window instead, covering her mouth with her hand.

"Something you you'd like to share Major?" Jack asked without needing to look at her. He had seen the same thing she had and he didn't like it. Sam shook her head and cleared her throat.

"No sir."

"Good." Jack replied and pulled on his sunglasses. "Let's go."

The drivers pulled out and the group was on their way to a surprise that only Jonas was not clear on. Rose, every now and then, looked over at Jonas, who practically had his face smushed against the glass. She realized then that this was the first time he was seeing Earth outside of Stargate Command. It was a big deal for him and she respected that, keeping quiet and allowing him to marvel.

Rose herself appreciated the beauties that Earth had to offer, but nothing compared to Luxima in her eyes. She missed the trees that reached the skies with trunks as thick as three of Earth's telephone poles. She missed the smell of wet dirt and the wildflowers. She missed the crisp, cool waters of the rivers and lakes and the sound of the Falls. She missed home.

"Do you see this, Rose?" Jonas' voice caught her off guard. She looked over at him, unsure what he was meaning. He pointed to something outside the window that she couldn't see passed him. She said nothing and he never turned around, meaning he was too preoccupied to truly care if anyone else was seeing what he saw. She gave a small laugh and shook her head, looking forward through the windshield. Teal'c turned his head slightly and she caught his gaze. She shrugged and smiled back at him, assuring him enough to face forward once more.

Rose had usually ridden with Teal'c and Daniel when they had places they needed to visit. Even though Daniel was gone it was nice, for both of them, to have a third person. Someone who had that same curiosity and wonderment for the world.

Rose looked back out her window again and leaned her elbow on the small edge, fingers touching her lips. The drive was much longer than she would have liked. So, to occupy herself, she began to hum softly, the lyrics resounding in her head like a chant.

"What is that?" Jonas asked and pulled himself from the window. Rose glanced over at him and then looked down at the jeep's floor.

"A requiem hymn." Rose replied and met his gaze once more.

"It's beautiful." Jonas commented, earning Teal'c's interest. He didn't look back, but an eyebrow raised in curiosity. "I mean for a song sang at a funeral and all."

"I know what you mean." Rose began the requiem hymn again softly and looked back out the window. The song's purpose was for a Mass of the Dead, but she too found it oddly soothing and beautiful; hauntingly beautiful.


	14. Sampling A Dark Path

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

It had been a couple of days since the _surprise_ of the X-302 Hyperspace Fighter. Rose didn't quite understand why they felt they needed an aircraft capable of interstellar travel. Wasn't that what the Stargate was for? She had decided, though, that it was her fear of flying that made her think such things.

She headed out of her room and into the hall, heading for the elevator. She rode it a floor up and got off. She had left some books in her 'office.' She had been assigned one when they had all returned from their fieldtrip. Jack had been more excited about the office space than the X-302, which she found strange.

"You know, discover new worlds, new cultures, help rid the galaxy of the Gou'ald." Rose could hear Jonas' voice echoing gently through the hall as rounded the corner.

"I get the picture, Jonas." Sam's voice followed. Rose stopped in the hall. She knew that it was inappropriate to eve's drop, but she couldn't help it.

"I can't stay here in this base the rest of my life. I can't go back to my planet." Jonas' voice fell off for a brief moment. "They don't realize the threat that's out there. I can help them by helping you. I can also help finish what Dr. Jackson started."

There was a long silence. Rose made to take a step closer and then stopped. She crossed her arms over her chest, blue blouse scrunching in parts and looked towards the doorway into Sam's office.

"Jonas, I understand why you wanna join SG-1," Sam faltered again, "and I'm sorry but I just don't see that happening."

Another silence and then Jonas walked casually out of Sam's office. He glanced at Rose in the hallway, caught sight of her sympathetic gaze and kept walking. She turned around and rounded the corner again after him.

"Jonas…" Rose reached out for him and gently caught his arm. He slowed instantly to a stop. She walked around to stand before him and placed her other hand on his other arm, locking him there. She looked him over from top to bottom and then back up. Slowly, she shook her head. She wanted to say something to make him feel better, comfort him like he had tried to do for her on countless occasions. She couldn't find a single word though.

Instead, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a soft hug. It was slightly awkward and the large schematic book he carried beneath one arm poked at her, but she held him to her anyway. Her eyes darted back and forth, unsure of how long this things were supposed to last.

She rarely showed physical affection towards people. There were only a few, such as Avia, Jack and Daniel whom she had ever felt comfortable enough with touching. For an unmarried woman of her age it was unacceptable to touch a man in _any_ way. Thus, she avoided it altogether until she arrived on Earth for the first time with Daniel and Jack. They had become her family; paternal and fraternal figures in her life. Jonas was neither.

She pulled away nervously and licked her lips, keeping her eyes from his. She could feel heat rushing to her cheeks and so she fled. Not as quickly as a sprint, but just fast enough that it caught Sam's attention as she passed her office. She headed straight to her own office and walked inside, sitting down at her own desk. When she was sure that she was alone and no one was going to surprise her, she released a long sigh of relief. She patted her cheeks gently, heat radiating from them. Her heart beat fast and her finger tingled. She could hear Avia's voice in her head.

" _You know that was inappropriate, child. A young woman such as yourself shouldn't be unaccompanied with a young man let alone touching him in such an intimate manner."_

"Where are you, Gaenor, when I need you…?" Rose found herself asking aloud. She hated to admit it, but she forcefully tried not to think of Gaenor. The Alma had been with her since she was a child. She was like her sister, a piece of her own self even. Rose rubbed her chest over her heart. It was as though something had been ripped from her, leaving a throbbing open wound in its wake.

She let her hand fall and reached to the small stereo on her desk. She turned it on and hit the play button, listening for a moment to the CD that Jonas had given to her. It was the Vivaldi that Daniel had first introduced her too. Winter gently floated on the air, soothing her. She closed her air and allowed the music to take her away from everything.

* * *

Rose pushed open the door and headed into the cafeteria. She had been in her office for several hours reading through books that Daniel had recommended once a long time ago. She had lost track of time until her stomach had growled, urging her it needed sustenance. She spotted Teal'c at the counter, loading his tray with whatever was in arms reach. She walked up beside him and filled a plate with some fruits and then raw vegetables. She followed him back to a table where Jack sat with a stack of folders. He held one open and was reading through it briskly. Rose assumed they were new applicants for the team.

He smiled at her briefly and then looked to Teal'c. His faced stayed straight, but she knew exactly what he was thinking.

"Little snack?" Jack asked in reference to the tray being overwhelmed with different foods. Teal'c only stared back at him and then returned to eating. Jack shook his head and returned to his task at hand. Rose picked up an orange from her plate and began to peel it, the succulent scent driving her stomach mad.

"I'm telling you," Jack began and shuffled through some of the papers in the folder, "the universities of this great nation are getting a little lax in their admissions."

"To whom are you referring, O'Neill?" Teal'c piped up as Rose looked from Jack to him and then back again.

"I mean I can be as diplomatic and open-minded as anyone." Teal'c and Rose immediately looked to each other. Both knew that was untrue whether Jack wanted to admit it or not. "Hammond is insisting SG-1 needs a socio-political nerd to off-set our overwhelming _coolness_."

"have you considered Jonas Quinn?" Teal'c spoke and then popped another grape into his mouth. Rose looked across the table at him and silently munched on her orange. Her eyes drifted to Jack, who only looked to Teal'c with disapproval.

"Now I know you've been practicing, but I still can't tell." Jack began and leaned closer to Teal'c. "Is that a joke?"

Teal'c met his stare.

"He wishes to join the fight against the Gou'ald." Teal'c released the grape in his hand and sat straighter in his seat as though a diplomat himself. Rose looked back at Jack, orange slice after orange slice pushed into her mouth to keep her silent.

"He's an ali–" Jack cut himself off and stared at Teal'c a moment. His eyes drifted to Rose and then back again; back and forth for a long moment. "-en. He's an alien…"

Rose took offense and she couldn't see that Teal'c did too, but both remained collected. Jack said dumb things all the time. They just had a nasty habit of slipping through the filter in his head a lot more lately.

"Point is, I don't think we need someone else on the team." Jack closed the folder in front of him and leaned on the table. "You, Carter, Rose, and I can handle things just fine."

"You learned to trust me, O'Neill." Teal'c argued and glanced at Rose. "You also learned to trust Rose."

"That's different. You both are different." Jack looked away and back at the stack of folders sitting at the center of the round table.

"I do not believe it is." Teal'c's gaze never left Jack for a second. "Like Rose and I, Jonas Quinn may be an alien to this world, but he has vowed to commit himself to the cause of the Tau'ri."

"Yeah well that doesn't mean I want him watching my back in battle." Jack looked to Teal'c again. Rose set the last of the orange peel down and wiped her hands on a napkin. "Okay you two?"

Jack's gaze fell on her. She only stared back at him silently. She was not about to get into another fight with him over Jonas earning a place on SG1. She had tried and tried and it had gotten nowhere. Hopefully Teal'c had made more of an impact.

Suddenly the alarm went off. Rose looked around the room and spotted the familiar flashing red light.

"Unscheduled incoming traveler." A voice spoke over the loud speaker. Rose looked between Jack and Teal'c before standing up. She followed them out into the hall and towards the Gate Room. They were stopped just before, being met by Sam, General Hammond and Bra'tac. Jack greeted him, but the visitor's eyes were resilient in moving away from Teal'c.

"Tek ma te, Master Bra'tac." Teal'c greeted with a smile.

"I'm sorry I did not come sooner, Teal'c. Drey'auc is gravely ill." Bra'tac explained as Teal'c looked instantly to General Hammond in question. The General nodded and urged him to go with Bra'tac. Rose looked to Jack and Same in question of what was going on, but they too had no idea. Jack walked off to follow General Hammond and wish Teal'c good luck as Rose followed after Sam to the elevator only to be stopped by Jonas.

"Hey, what's happening?" He asked quickly. Apparently he had been on his way to see who the visitor was when he found them. Sam quickly explained about Teal'c, Bra'tac and Drey'auc and why Bra'tac was here.

"I didn't know Teal'c had a wife." Jonas commented as they entered the elevator. Rose kept to the other side of Sam.

"And a son, Rya'c. They were banished from their home on Chulak when Teal'c defected." The three of them stepped off the elevator as Sam continued to explain. "At one point Apophis actually brainwashed Rya'c and tried to use him against us. Bra'tac's been looking out for them ever since."

"So why didn't Teal'c just bring 'em here?" Jonas asked as the elevator door opened again to let them out. The three walked out and headed down the corridor.

"Well, Drey'auc wanted to stay with her own people if possible and Teal'c was away on missions most of the time anyway. He tries to get home as often as he can, but it's not easy for him."

"You'd never know, would you?"

"Yeah, well, Teal'c's not exactly an open book." Sam turned to him and gave a small smile.

"No one is around here." Rose heard the tone in Jonas' voice and wondered if he was referring to her for some reason. "Still, I'm usually much better at reading people."

"Major!" A foreign voice shouted from behind them. They all turned and looked as a middle-aged man in a strange uniform barreled towards them.

"Oh no…" Rose grumbled, spotting the Russian Colonel Chekov.

"Who's that?" Jonas asked from beside her, neither looking to the other. Rose shook her head and watched as the Colonel stormed towards them.

"Trouble." She grumbled again. The Colonel stopped before Sam, face fuming.

"Why was I not informed about the X-302?" Colonel Chekov spat at her.

"For example, it might not be that obvious to everyone, but this man is actually very upset." Jonas tried to remove the attention for a moment from Sam to himself. Rose closed her eyes as though his corniness pained her.

"Let's take this somewhere private, shall we?" Rose interjected and brushed passed the Colonel, averting his attention to her. He followed after Rose with heavy footfalls and into General Hammond's office. He looked up from his desk to see Rose and questioned her sudden appearance.

"Pardon my intrusion, sir, but Colonel Chekov would like to inquire why he was not privy to information regarding the X-302." Rose explained with all seriousness as Chekov strode into the room followed by Sam and Jonas.

"How did you find out about the X-302, Colonel?" General Hammond asked and stood from his desk to be eye level with Chekov.

"That is not the issue." Chekov argued and shook his head once. "Article 3A clearly states–"

"The X-302 has nothing to do with the Stargate."

"The Naquadria being used to power the hyperspace window generator was procured–"

The alarms suddenly go off a second time that day and cut Colonel Chekov off.

"Unauthorized incoming wormhole." The voice on the intercom spoke once again as the emergency lights flashed red.

"What now?" Sam spoke under a breath.

"I'll take anything over this." General Hammond commented and headed towards the Control room with Sam and Rose, leaving Jonas behind with Chekov.

"We're not receiving an IDC, Sir. In fact, there's nothing, Sir." Sergeant Davis explains as he typed away at his station.

"Uh, what's going on?" Jack asked as he entered the room. He stood beside Rose and looked down at Sam, who sat at an open station.

"Apparently nothing." Sam replied and shook her head.

"Nothing?" Jack was slightly surprised.

"It would seem so." Sam turned and looked up at him. She gave a small shrug.

"Hm." Jack looked to Rose and crossed his arms over his chest. "That's a twist."

"Gate's functioning properly. We're definitely looking at an incoming wormhole." Sam confirmed and shook her head again as she took typed away at the station.

"But nothing is incoming?" General Hammond asked, seeming to be as confused as the rest of them.

"As far as I can tell." She replied again.

"The Goa'uld used that tactic before." Jack stated, remembering the event clearly. Rose looked around at them all, entirely confused. She realized then just how long she had been from Stargate Command.

"To block our escape while they attacked in ships, yeah." Sam nodded her head, remembering as well.

"Nothing from deep space watch either." Sergeant Davis pipped up and hung up the phone. Everyone looked around at everyone else. No one had any idea what was going on.

"This doesn't make any sense. In order to keep a wormhole open, you have to send something through; a radio signal, anything. But we're getting nothing." Sam tried to work through the problem in her head, but was coming up short.

"Figure it out, Major. I'll call the President." General Hammond ordered and head back up to his office. Rose stared out the window into the Gate Room. She could see the blue glow from behind the iris, casting shadows on the walls.

"Is the gate experiencing a malfunction?" Rose asked and looked back to Sam. "Or perhaps a trick by someone else?"

"Could be. I'm not quite sure at the moment."

"Who else?" Jack caught what she had said and looked at her.

"The one who sent me here?" She asked timidly, almost afraid to say it. Jack's eyes darted to Sam, who shared his expression. Rose caught it. She may be right.

" Could it be a malfunction of some kind?" General Hammond asked, hands laced atop the table.

"Rose suggested that as well, sir. It's possible, but highly unlikely. Chances are somebody dialed Earth from an off-world Gate."

"Wrong number?" Jack asked with wishful thinking and a hint of mockery.

"Well, normally the Gate shuts down automatically after a short period of time if nothing's entering the event horizon from the out-going location." Sam explained and looked to Jack.

"So what do we do?" Jack asked her.

"We wait." She said simply and shrugged. "To my knowledge no one's been able to sustain a wormhole for longer than 38 minutes."

"Could whoever's behind this redial our Gate repeatedly just to keep us from using it?" General Hammond asked, the idea suddenly popping into his head.

"I've programmed the computer to dial the Alpha site immediately after the incoming wormhole expires, just in case. We'll be able to recall our off-world teams and hopefully contact someone who can help." Sam continued to talk as Rose watched the clock set up behind them on a laptop.

 **00:37:57**

 **00:37:58**

 **00:37:59**

 **00:38:00**

 **00:38:01**

 **00:38:02**

"Thirty-eight minutes and your gate is still on." Rose stated and looked back at them all. They looked to her and then to the stopwatch, observing as it continued to climb and the Stargate was still held.

"OK, now we have a problem." Sam confirmed, voice filling with worry as she looked around at them all. "I'm going to go back down to the Control Room and see if there are any fluctuations in the sensors."

"Wonderful." Jack's face construed his worry as he shook his head. Rose looked back at the stopwatch and licked her lips.

 **00:40:46**

 **00:40:47**

 **00:40:48**

This was bad. Very bad. She never knew that this could happen with the Stargate. Did the Elder know? They couldn't. They hardly knew anything about the gate… at least that's what they had led everyone to believe.

"Where are you going?" Jack asked suddenly as Rose tried to slip away. She stopped in the doorway to the hall and looked back at the men.

"To see if there are any spirits lingering that are willing to listen to me." She replied with all honesty and then exited the room. She headed down the hall, rode the elevator down and headed into her room. If this was caused by the same thing that threw her into Stargate Command, then perhaps there was something like it lingering about that could aid her. Perhaps Gaenor would hear her and know something.

Rose placed a single white pillar candle on the small altar she had set up in the corner of her room years ago. She lit it and kneeled on the floor before it, whispering prayers to the spirits to listen to her pleas. A small breeze brushed past her face and extinguished the candle. Rose opened her eyes to the darkness and struck another match, relighting it.

"You have my attention." She spoke softly, gently. She had practiced this enough not to be frightened by who may answer the call. She could hear something; a small voice, a faraway voice. "I cannot hear you. Come closer. Speak louder."

The voice came again, but as before she could not hear what they were saying. It continued on and on and on, repeating the same words over and over again. Rose tried to focus on it, hear the voice, and understand the words.

… _tu fieri sum immolari pro nobis esse renascentis…_

She caught a single phrase. Her eyes snapped open and she swallowed the words down. She was hoping to find Geanor or one of the other spirits she had spoken too before, but something had come through that was not supposed to; something darker, familiar. It had happened before, but this time it felt much different. This spirit was angry.

Rose quickly walked to the door and turned on the lights. She blew out the candle to extinguish all communications between the spirits and herself before she sat down on the edge of her bed. She stared at the smoke rising from the candle. She laced her hands together and placed her elbows on her knees, leaning forward. She sat there for a long time, fearing that the candle might relight itself like she had heard in warning from Avia, who had told her time and time again to cease the unnatural craft. Rose hadn't listened because nothing had happened. She now wondered if that had been because she had an Alma sharing her life-force; a being of the dead to protect her from others of the kind. Without Gaenor, Rose would be treading a very dark path she ought not to go down.

* * *

Tu fieri sum immolari pro nobis esse renascentis = you must be sacrificed for us to be reborn


	15. When You're Ready

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose sat in the briefing room at the table, swiveling side to side slowly as she stared blankly at the long running stopwatch. Her nails drummed against the wood in a rhythmically eerie fashion.

 **12:04:17**

 **12:04:18**

Sam and Jack had left the base, heading to the Area 51 hanger where the X-302 was quickly trying to be finished. No one had any other ideas on what to do other than to try and contact the Asgards. Jack and Sam had volunteered for the flight test.

Scientists and technicians in white coats bustled around the room. One sat to Rose's left with a computer set-up and typing away some algorithm Rose didn't understand. Jonas walked behind Rose with a notebook in hand and pen in the other. She didn't know when he had come into the room or when any of them had really. She had been sitting at the table for a while ever since trying to contact Gaenor.

"You're missing the point, Doctor." General Hammond's voice followed him into the briefing room from his office with a man Rose didn't recognize. She watched silently as they walked passed her, followed by Jonas.

"General, can I have a minute?" Jonas interrupted and approached them. The two men turned and gave him their attention.

"I wish I had one. Major Carter and Colonel O'Neill are about to take off." General Hammond replied.

"That's what this is about, Sir." Jonas' tone spiked Rose's interest. She turned in her seat and leaned on the table, trying to get closer.

"What do you mean?" General Hammond became confused.

"Look, I'm no scientist, but I have studied all of the Goa'uld research done on Naquadria and as you know, Major Carter allowed me to see the specifications on the X-302." Jonas was quick to try and explain.

"And?"

"It's not going to work." Jonas spoke simply and shook his head. The man Rose didn't recognize looked to Jonas with knitted eyebrows.

"Really? That's just what I was saying. Who are you?" He asked, questioning Jonas' presence.

"Jonas Quinn." Jonas spoke as though it should be obvious and just looked down at him.

"Oh! The alien with the whacky Naquada." The man's tone didn't sit well with Rose. She stood from the table and stood beside Jonas and General Hammond.

"Naquadria… and you are?" Rose corrected the man and crossed her arms over her chest, tight black V-neck wrinkling beneath her arms.

"McKay. Scientist. Earth." He seemed offended that she didn't already know. Rose only gave him a look that expressed her unimpressed demeanor.

Just to annoy him more she raised an eyebrow and asked, "Who?"

"General," Jonas shook his head at Rose and McKay, turning back to General Hammond, "the instability of the Naquadria increases exponentially as you attempt to extract more energy out of it."

"Oh, this is even worse than I thought." McKay stated as his eyes landed on the notebook in Jonas was using as a reference with all his notes and calculations inside. He took the notebook from Jonas and began reading over the writings.

"Sir, if you allow this test to proceed–"

"Son, this is not just a test. If the X-302 fails, this planet will be destroyed." General Hammond cut him off in earnest.

"I understand your position, Sir."

"It's not just my position. You stand to suffer the consequences along with everyone else. Now, if either of you have a more prudent suggestion on halting this crisis, I'm willing to hear it. Otherwise, I suggest we all go downstairs, cross our fingers and hope Major Carter and Colonel O'Neill can reach help."

"General!" Rose called after him, catching him on the stairs. He looked back at her and she took two small steps closer, leaning on the railing. "I would trust Jonas on this, sir."

"I do Rose." General Hammond admitted and then shook his head. "But we have no other ideas at the moment."

"Cross our fingers?" Jonas' voice caught Rose's attention as General Hammond made his way down the stairs again. She looked back at Jonas and McKay.

"It's a superstitious way some humans have of expressing their desire for good luck." McKay explained and crossed two of his fingers to demonstrate. "Ridiculous, huh?"

Rose leaned over the railing as McKay began down the stairs and snatched Jonas' notebook from his grip. She shook her head after him and the closed her eyes, sighing heavily. She slapped her other hand with the notebook a few times and then pushed off from the railing. She handed the notebook back to Jonas and then walked to the window of the briefing room overlooking the Gate Room.

"It's not going to work." Jonas spoke up as he stood beside her, looking at the Stargate.

"I know Jonas." Rose nodded her head and licked her lips. She crossed her arms over her chest again and shook her head at the gate. "We should go down stairs with General Hammond."

She looked up at him as she turned and headed for the stairs. He followed a few feet behind her quietly and stood off to her side in the Control Room.

"It's too bad we can't drive across the galaxy. This thing handles like a Cadillac on the ground." Jack's voice floated in over the intercom.

"Colonel, Major, this is Hammond." General Hammond leaned over the microphone set up at Sergeant Davis' workstation. "Jonas Quinn has voiced some concern about this mission specifically regarding the instability of the Naquadria and Rose believes we should listen."

Rose could feel Jonas' eyes on her. She looked to him and gave a small smile at seeing his own. He mouthed a thank you to her and she nodded her head once.

"Sir, the simulations we ran anticipated every conceivable scenario." Sam replied through the intercom. General Hammond looked over at Rose and Jonas.

"You know, Carter, it's the inconceivable ones I'm concerned about." Jack's voice came over the intercom, making Rose release a small huff of a laugh.

"The X-302 has hundreds of safety mechanisms to compensate for anything that can go wrong, Sir." Rose shook her head at Sam's reply and stared up at the ceiling of the room.

"Not everything can be answered with science and numbers." Rose breathed out and scratched the back of her head with a single digit.

"Arming ejection system." Sam spoke up followed by a short laugh from Jack.

"That's good." Jack was mocking Sam right back. "That's good, that's funny."

"Mission command…all systems go from Abydos One." Sam confirmed.

"Copy that, Abydos One. Good luck." General Hammond replied and shared a look of concern with Jonas. Rose could feel her hands sweating with anxiety and quickly crossed her arms over her chest in a nervous action.

"Well, here goes nothing." Jack breathed out, voice coming in over the intercom. Jonas began pacing back and forth as Sergeant Davis, McKay and General Hammond looked to the upper screens in the Control Room, watching the X-302 taking flight.

"We have lift off." Sam announced. "And climbing."

"Velocity approaching Mach two." Jack spoke up after her.

"10,000 meters."

"Mach three."

"Mission Command, over." Mission Command called to Jack and Sam. "Looks good from here, Abydos One."

"Abydos One, over." Jack confirmed.

"Preparing for main rocket engine burn." Sam's voice caused Jonas and General Hammond to share another look of concern. Rose's hands gripped her upper arms tightly, knuckles turning white. Her people were not _technologically advanced_ as Earth was and she may not understand how exactly the X-302 worked, but she did understand how dangerous the situation was. She understood the risk that her friends, Jack and Sam, were taking.

"Roger that, Abydos. We'll re-establish contact on Satcom 3 after you exit the atmosphere." Mission Command responded over the intercom.

"Engaging rocket engine." Jack's words were followed by a long silence. Rose rest her left arm on top of her right across her chest and gently gnawed on her thumb nail. The silence was killing her. McKay walked up beside her.

"You're an alien too right? How do you like your stay on Earth?" He asked, pointing a finger at her in response to his first question. She said nothing for a moment and this seemed to encourage McKay to continue. That was not her intent though. "So, what's your name?"

"Greatly uninterested." She replied instantly and looked to him with a hard expression "Now if you'll excuse me."

She walked over to where Jonas now stood with General Hammond at one of the workstations. He looked down at her, worry etched into his features. She wanted to smile reassuringly, but couldn't. She wasn't sure herself what was going to happen. Instead, she pushed her hand between his side and his upper arm, linking them together. With her other hand she patted his arm gently unsure whether she was comforting herself or him. He seemed surprised and confused on how to react, but he allowed the touch just as before when she had hugged him in the hallway.

Suddenly, Jack's voice came again.

"Mission Command, this is Abydos One, do you read?" He called over the intercom. Rose released the breath she hadn't realized she had been holding and closed her eyes. She felt Jonas tighten his arm, trying to tell her it was alright.

"Loud and clear, Abydos One." Mission Command replied.

"Altitude, 500 kilometers and rising. Velocity, 40,000 kilometers per hour."

"I'm entering the coordinates in the hyperspace generator." Sam piped up. Her voice sounded so far away.

"Roger that, Abydos One." Mission Command replied and the line went quiet.

"God's speed Colonel, Major, from all of us." General Hammond spoke up and looked to Jonas, who crossed his index fingers, one on each hand, over the other. Rose gave a small smile and tried to swallow her nervousness. It was hard when you could tell everyone else around you was just as nervous and concerned with the mission at hand.

"Thank you, Sir." Jack replied as the line went quiet, "Engaging hyperspace window."

Rose closed her eyes once more and held her breath, counting in her head. It was a trick Jack had taught her years ago when she had nearly gone into a panic attack on Abydos her first time through the Stargate.

 _One Mississippi…_

 _Two Mississipp …_

 _Three Mississippi…_

She had found it strange at first; counting numbers to relieve stress. It worked though and when she had learned that Mississippi was actually something the Tau'ri called 'states' she found the custom entertaining.

 _Four Mississippi…_

 _Five Mississippi…_

 _Six Mississippi…_

 _Seven Mississippi…_

"Abydos One, this is mission command, do you read?" Mission Command came over the intercom unexpectedly. "We are still receiving your radio signal."

"Mission Command, we missed the window." Jack growled back, angry at himself.

"Abydos One, please explain." Mission Command demanded.

"The autopilot engaged and we veered off course at the last second, Mission Command." Sam answered. "Should we try again?"

"Negative, Abydos One, return to base for further evaluation." Mission Command sounded deflated and then came the words everyone dreaded. "Mission failure."

"…I hate hearing that." Jack grumbled and then the communications went offline. Rose turned her head and hid her face in Jonas' arm for a moment. She hated this; hated Tau'ri technology and its flaws. Why they bothered with it, she would never understand.

"You okay?" Jonas asked gently and Rose pulled herself away, letting go of his arm. She nodded her head and ran a hand along the top of her head till she met the braids that wrapped around her head, keeping strays from the rest of her hair that laid flat from her face.

"I don't understand technology and I have no desire too. It seems like more anxiety and trouble than it's worth." She answered and licked her lips, placing her hands on her hips. She turned her face towards the ceiling with closed eyes and shook her head. "Oh spirits above, please help me to understand their methods."

* * *

Jack and Sam's figures appeared in the hall, heading straight for the briefing room. Rose sat down at the table again in her seat, cheeks in her hands and elbows on the table, watching the stopwatch.

 **58:09:04**

 **58:09:05**

 **58:09:06**

"Colonel, Major, I'm glad to see you're okay." General Hammond announced as he walked around the table with a report in his hand. Jonas talked with one of the technicians closest to the window overlooking the Gate Room with an orange in his hand.

"For the moment, Sir." Jack responded as he and Sam followed the General around the table. Rose watched them with her eyes as they walked behind her seat. Jack gently placed a hand on her shoulder a moment and then let go.

"They're still analyzing the flight data recorder, but it looks like a 605-3 error." Sam explained and shook her head. General Hammond looked up from the monitor set up on the table beside Rose and looked between Jack and Sam.

"Forgive me?" He asked as Jonas slowly stepped closer to hear what was happening.

"It's the one after 605-2… sir." Jack replied with a hint of sarcasm in his tone. A tone that General Hammond didn't seem to appreciate at the moment. Sam shook her head at the Colonel and looked back at the General.

"The X-302 couldn't get a lock on its destination once the window was open so it auto-aborted." She explained further and shook her head again. "It's one of the built in safety features."

"What went wrong?" McKay walked over, unable to resist the conversation even though he was clearly uninvited.

"The hyperspace window was unstable." Sam looked at him briefly and then looked to General Hammond. "We thought we'd compensated for the energy fluctuations emitted by the Naquadria, but apparently not."

"I don't think you can." Jonas spoke up and took another tentative step closer, peeling the orange.

"Apparently, Carter and I could have been torn asunder." Again Jack made a sarcastic comment, earning a shake of the head from Rose, who kept her back to them all.

"The possibility of that was remote, Sir." Sam argued, looking to the Colonel.

"More likely, is you just would have been transported to an unknown location with limited fuel, oxygen and no way of getting back." McKay clarified, looking between the both of them.

"Can this problem be resolved?" General Hammond was quick to draw them back to the issue at hand.

"Sir, we don't even understand why the problem exists, yet." Sam's voice sounded so deflated.

"You're lucky. There's no telling how much damage an unstable hyperspace window could have caused." McKay's comment caused Sam to look at him with a mocking smile.

"The bottom line is," General Hammond shook his head and relinquished to the hard truth, "we're on our own."

Rose continued to watch the stopwatch tick. She didn't really understand the whole situation. Of course she understood that the Stargate was at risk of combusting and the resulting explosion would exterminate all life on Earth. What she didn't understand was why the necromancer dragged her here to be killed this way when it had told Stargate Command that she would be safe here. Seemed very ironic.

Rose closed her eyes and rubbed her fingers over them, pushing gently to relieve the strain. She took a deep breath and stood up from the table.

"Where are you going?" Jack asked as she pushed in her seat.

"To my room." She replied gently and left the briefing room. Jack looked back at Sam and then at General Hammond for an answer. Neither knew what was wrong and both shook their heads. So, Jack resorted to tossing his gaze on Jonas.

"She's probably just tired, Colonel." Jonas replied to the silent question, popping a piece of orange in his mouth. He looked towards the doorway leading into the hall and then followed after her. In truth, he wasn't sure what was wrong. It could be stress, like the rest of them, lack of sleep, hunger. Everyone on base was feeling the strain of imminent annihilation. It was her voice that made Jonas suspicious that it was more. There was an undertone he hadn't heard before the last several months that they had grown close; became friends.

He spotted her at the elevator, doors opening and jogged to catch up. He barely missed it and cursed under his breath gently as he tossed the rest of his orange into the nearby waste bin. He waited and waited and waited till finally the elevator came back up from the sleeping quarters. He rode the elevator down and headed right down the hallway, knowing it would lead to her room. He stopped before the door and raised a hand to knock, but didn't. He heard Rose's voice coming from within and so he pressed his ear to the door.

"What do you mean?" Rose asked from inside in a hushed voice. Jonas jumped when he heard a second voice, too soft for him to understand. "Where is she then? …please, speak up. I can barely hear you."

Jonas pulled back from the door and just stared at it a moment. He wondered who was in there with her. He hadn't seen anyone else in the hall as he approached, but then again he had been a bit behind her. He stepped away from the door and began walking down the hall. He had intended on making sure she was alright, just tired and nothing more. It settled within him strangely that her and someone else were in her room with the door closed, talking in hushed voices.

"Jonas!" A voice called out from the hall he had just come from. He stopped and turned around to see Rose.

"Uh hey." Jonas scratched the end of his nose awkwardly. "I was uh just coming to make sure you were alright."

"Oh." Rose's eyes went wide slightly in surprise and then a gentle smile spread across her lips. "Thank you. I appreciate that."

"Don't take this the wrong way or anything, but I uh heard you talking to someone in your room." Jonas started and looked back down the hallway towards her door. Rose went stiff and her jaw clenched, hoping Jonas didn't notice. She looked back towards her door for a moment, trying to think of what to say. She wasn't ready to tell him yet about what she did at her altar. She hoped that he would read her profile report and then come to her, ask about it.

"Oh that!" She quickly turned around and gave a small laugh. "I had the television on. Some movie called the Wolf-man or something."

"I thought you don't like TV?" Jonas asked. He was nearly certain that she had told him that a while ago.

"Well," Rose tried to think quickly, "what else is there to do?"

After another moment Jonas nodded his head, accepting her explanation.

"I was heading to the cafeteria. Care to join?" She asked with a smile, taking a step passed him towards the direction of the elevator.

"Yeah, sure." Jonas replied as his stomach growled. Apparently, an orange wasn't enough for him. He and she walked through the hall to the elevator and headed to the next floor. They walked in silence, neither really having much to say. The base was in an uproar and yet, Rose seemed so…

"Why aren't you as worried as everyone else?" Jonas finally asked. "I mean, if you are, you hide it well."

Rose laughed and stopped before the glass door entering the cafeteria. She looked up at him and smiled.

"You learn to hide your fears and worries in training so that when you are on the battlefield and someone looks to you, they don't see it. Instead, they see resolve and strength... though, in all honesty," she stopped a moment and looked down at the floor, "it's just a defense mechanism."

"You don't have to hide it." Jonas' voice was comforting, tender. Rose met his gaze. "We're all afraid right now. We're all awaiting our imminent death."

"I am not afraid to die." Rose shook her head at him.

"Then what is it?" Jonas and Rose shared a stare for a long moment. Rose gave a small, almost sad laugh and then looked through the glass door that led into the cafeteria. She watched several of the people inside talking, eating, living… No, she wasn't afraid to die. **That** was the easy part.

"Let's get something to eat." Rose suggested and opened the door, holding it open for Jonas. He said nothing, realizing that she wasn't ready to tell him. She watched him as he headed for the food counter and sighed.

Dying was easy…

Death was hard…

"They have chocolate cake! You're favorite!" Jonas called out to her, holding a piece of cake in his hand for her to see. She smiled, giving a small laugh and walked over to him. She took the cake and dipped her finger in the frosting, tasting it. Jonas watched her quietly, smile falling from his face. "You're not alone, Rose."

She froze, finger in her mouth. She slowly slid it from her lips and lowered the cake to the counter. Her hands were locked on the plate.

"When you're ready to talk about all that's happened," Jonas' voice grew softer. Rose's eyes slowly met his, seeming apprehensive of what he was doing. "I'm here. No matter what time, day or night. Okay?"

Rose thought about it for a moment and then nodded her head. When she was ready, Jonas told himself, not before. He wouldn't rush her. He knew that she needed time. She was still coping with everything that had happened. Everyone on base liked to forget how she arrived at Stargate Command, what the necromancer had said, and the fact that Rose had died; not once, but twice. Jonas hadn't forgotten though. Not since she had collapsed in his arms in the hallway after Daniel's death.


	16. Second Chances

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose sat in her office with her cheeks in the palm of her hands and elbows propped up on the desk top. She stared blankly at the wall across from her and sighed heavily. There was nothing she could do. The Stargate was still facing imminent self-destruction and no one had come up with an idea that worked. Least of all her. She felt very… foolish around the Earth scientists who discussed thermal radiations and wormholes, calculations she could never hope to be able to solve. She had never felt unintelligent in her life, but here it was another story. Her people were, as Daniel had once described them to her, Classists of some sort. Jonas elaborated after reading through Daniel's notebooks as her people showing the principles and style embodied in the literature, art, and architecture of ancient Greece and Rome. He had gone on, seeming to be carried away, stating that her people seemed to adhere to traditional standards, such as simplicity, restraint, and proportion n that are universally and enduringly valid.

Rose hadn't understood anything of what he had told her. Not until he had given her several books, _children's_ books, with plenty of pictures and then came the more **adult** books. She knew he hadn't meant anything by them. Children's books just had more visual representations than adult books. She still didn't quite agree with the check-list that compared her culture with that of Earth's Classism.

Rose spotted the pile of books Jonas had left for her sitting on a small bookcase. She picked herself up and walked to them, pulling one out at random. Of course it happened to be a children's book. Rose looked up at the ceiling with sarcastic incredulity and then shook her head, hair swaying back and forth over her back and shoulders. She opened the book and landed on a page of common dress in Ancient Greece; the chiton, peplos, himation, chlamys. Rose flipped the pages and came to the Ancient Romans. There the dress was not much better; togas, tunics, stolas, brooches.

"What're you up to?"

Rose jumped, yell erupting from her and the book fell from her hands. It clambered to the cement ground as Rose clapped a hand to her chest over her heart, looking to the doorway to her office. Jonas walked into the office and picked up the book from the floor, turning it over in his free hand while the other held onto a travel mug. He looked at the page it was opened at and nodded his head at the pictures. He lifted his gaze from the book and observed what Rose was wearing. She was in a dress of blue and gold that fell just below her knees and draped over one shoulder, leaving the other barren. It was secured at her waist with a belt of knitted gold fiber.

"Still think your culture is so different?" Jonas asked and held the book out to her with a finger on a certain picture. Rose observed the woman in something called a stola. Her eyes raised slowly and then she shook her head, turning away from him and the book. Jonas just laughed and shut it, placing it on top of the counter that sat in the center of her office like his own. Rose walked over to her desk and sat down again, pulling a book towards her.

"What are you reading?" Jonas asked and sat down at one of the stool along the counter. Rose simply picked her book up, resting the bottom on the desk and turning it so Jonas could read it. "War and Peace. Good choice."

"You've read it?" She asked tentatively, eyes darting in his direction. Jonas nodded his head as his right hand played with a pile of paper clips on the counter. Rose let the book fall to the desk and pushed it away. "Have you read everything on this blasted planet?"

"I've had a lot of time on my hands." Jonas replied and looked over at her. "According to the tests Dr. Frasier administered, I have the ability to learn much quicker than the average human."

"Oh how wonderful for you." Rose hadn't meant to be so sarcastic or sound so resentful. Jonas fit in well here on Earth. She was a sore thumb even when she tried to blend in. "I'm sorry, Jonas. I didn't mean–"

"It's okay." Jonas walked closer and placed a hand on one of hers on the desk in comfort. He had realized instantly what was happening over the last day or so. Whenever a scientist or technician discussed something about the Stargate and the never receding wormhole, Rose had looked to him for an explanation. They both came from two very different worlds and his own was much closer to that of Earth than Luxima. Sam had told him once that Kelowna resembled the United States in the early 1940s. She had also explained to him that Rose's looked like something out of the children's books he had given Rose to look through. She was feeling that way too; ancient, not as advanced.

Rose looked back down at the book on the desk and bit her thumb nail. She wished she could learn like Jonas could. Just soak up all the knowledge in these books and be able to help Jack and General Hammond with the Stargate or at the very least sound as if she was somewhat learned in the Earthly matters of mathematics and science.

"My people are very simple, I am discovering." Rose stared at Jonas' hand on top of her. Slowly she slid hers out from under his and leaned back in her seat. She laced her hands together and set them in her lap. "I feel very… dim-witted compared to everyone else around here."

"You shouldn't." Jonas crouched down, crossing his arms over each other and resting them on the desk, chin on top. Rose gave a harsh laugh at herself and scratched her forehead in a nervous action. "So you don't know advanced mathematics or physics, but you do know the basic components."

"That's not enough." Rose looked back at him and shook her head.

"Rose, where you come from you don't need them. Your people have flourished for centuries without knowing the functions of a wormhole or how to compute calculus equations. Your people live very simply."

Rose's eye conveyed disdain for the word choice.

"I didn't mean you were simple. You live _simply_ ; humbly. Your people aren't always trying to develop new ways to live better. You're all happy with the way you live, the way you get food, travel, religion, warfare. If you needed mathematics or advanced science, then your people will develop it. It's not a bad thing."

Rose knew he was trying to help, but it wasn't doing anything. Her people did live **simply** in every meaning of the word and she knew. She had since her first encounter with Jack and Daniel. Her people farmed, hunted, fished with methods that were _archaic_ to the Tau'ri and Kelownans. Their medicines were herbal remedies and healer approaches through rituals, not real medical advancements like antibiotics or antivirals. Her people were… humble, as Jonas had put it.

"Care to take a walk with me?" Jonas asked suddenly as he stood up from his crouched position next to her desk. Rose, saying nothing, stood and straightened her clothing out. Jonas led her down the hallway and into the Gate Room. Jonas stood at the bottom of the ramp as she walked up it. She looked over the iris and spotted the familiar blue glow from behind where the Stargate lay open.

"Why are we here?" Rose asked suddenly, looking around the room. Jonas shrugged his shoulders and took a sip from his travel mug, looking over the Stargate. He walked up the ramp and stood beside her silently for a long while.

"I don't know..." Jonas looked up towards the ceiling and then back at the Stargate, searching for something. "How do you think they got it in here?"

Rose looked at Jonas with knitted eyebrows. He had caught her off-guard and, having never thought about it before, had no answer. The idea had just never crossed her mind. She looked around the Gate Room and her eyes locked on something up on the ceiling. It looked like a crack in the cement, but it was too perfect.

"Hatch in the ceiling." Rose replied and looked back at Jonas.

Jonas nodded his head and looked up for a moment, "That's what it looks like to me too."

"So they lowered the Stargate into SGC from the surface using some sort of crane or something." Rose concluded. Something clicked inside her head, gears turned. She looked to Jonas again, who slowly looked down at her. He took a calm sip from his travel mug. He had already guessed the same thing. Rose narrowed her eyes at him. He had been testing her for some reason.

"I bet you both regret coming here." Sam's voice came from behind them. Rose looked over her shoulder and spotted Sam at the end of the ramp in her fatigue pants and a black long sleeved shirt.

"Can't really look at it that way, now can we?" Jonas shot back without looking at her. Rose understood what he meant. Neither of them came to Earth willingly. Rose had been tossed like a bag of potatoes through the Stargate and Jonas had no choice at the time since he had betrayed his own people for the Tau'ri, stealing a prized resource to give to the outsiders.

"So, what are you two doing?" Sam tried to change the subject, looking from Jonas to Rose. Rose extended a hand up and pointed a single finger towards the ceiling. Sam followed her point and stared at the ceiling for a moment. She then looked back at Rose, shaking her head and giving a small 'I don't know what I'm supposed to be seeing' smile.

"You know, it's the stupidest thing, but it's been bugging me since I got here." Jonas replied and took another sip from his travel mug. His eyes narrowed as he thought aloud. "We're inside a mountain. The Gate obviously can't fit through any of these doors. So, how did it get here?"

"The ceiling retracts, yes?" Rose asked as she looked back up at the ceiling again. She pointed once more and this time Sam nodded her head in acknowledgment.

"Yeah and above it is a shaft that leads to the surface." Same began to explain. "There's a crane mechanism inside that which hoisted the Gate down."

"Interesting." Jonas replied and looked to Rose with a small smile. He gave her a knowing wink. Rose found it an odd gesture, but smiled back. She could clearly see through what he was trying to do. The whole idea wasn't clicking right away with Sam as it had with Rose. Jonas' look convey a silent message to Rose, telling her that she **was** smart, just a different _form_ of smart. Jonas looked back at Sam and motioned to the ceiling with his mug. "Does it go up?"

"Moving the Gate won't shut it off." Sam shook her head and crossed her arms over her chest. Rose nodded her head in agreement.

"No, simply moving it from the _mountain_ won't shut it off." Rose spoke in agreement with her statement. This was a game that she had seen Jack play with Sam before; common sense versus the brain.

"There is nowhere on Earth that…" Sam's voice fell away as the idea finally sunk in. Her gaze darted between Rose's smile and Jonas' back. She had been thinking too hard. There was a simple solution.

"We knew you'd think of something, Major." Jonas kept his back to her and let his arm fall to his side with the travel mug in hand. He shoved his other hand into his pants pocket and looked over the shut Stargate once more. Rose turned and looked at him once Sam had left. She stood at his side and looked up at the Stargate. She wondered about the gate at home and Jonas noticed her expression change.

"Do you think it's destroyed…?" Rose asked so softly she doubted that Jonas had heard her. When he didn't reply she knew he hadn't, but really he did. He had heard her perfectly; the apprehension and anxiety in her voice. He didn't reply because he didn't know. He couldn't tell her one way or the other. For all they knew, the Stargate on Luxima was destroyed and Rose was never going home.

"We should probably go back to the Briefing Room." Jonas turned to her and smiled, taking a sip of his travel mug again. "I could use some more."

Rose gave a half-hearted smile and nodded her head at him. There was nothing else she could do. She had nowhere to be and, whether or not the Stargate on Luxima was destroyed, without the one on Earth she was never going home anyway. She was stranded on a planet facing extinction, awaiting at death's door.

* * *

Rose stood by the window, staring down at the empty spot where the Stargate had stood. It had been raised from the Briefing Room through the retracted ceiling and taken to the base in Nevada, attached to the X-302 atop a 747.

Rose's arms were crossed firmly over her chest. She chewed nervously on her bottom lip. She couldn't help but think of the gate on her own planet. Was it still there behind the Falls? Had it been destroyed? Had her people been…?"

"Even if!" The shout caught Rose by surprise. She looked to her left at the door that led to General Hammond's office. Chekov stood on the opposite side of General Hammond's desk, both men's anger flaring. Rose took a deep breath and sighed, looking back into the Gate Room.

They were going to try it; the insane plane of removing the Stargate from Earth's surface and into space. Rose had gone to Jack and said her farewells, good lucks, given him a hug. Somehow she didn't feel worried. She just felt…

"Done." She breathed out and leaned her forehead against the glass. Her breath fogged it up. "I'm just done."

"They're airborne!" Sam shouted suddenly from where she sat before a series of monitors on the table. General Hammond walked out from his office, closing the door behind him and walked up behind Sam where Jonas already stood. "Altitude reaching 30 kilometers."

Rose closed her eyes and let herself rest against the glass. She heard footstep shuffling around her as the other scientists and technicians moved to get a better view of Sam's monitors.

"Altitude is 42 kilometers. He needs to reach 50 before he can fire the main rocket engine." Sam reported, eyes darting back and forth across the screens.

"Command, I've got a master caution alarm." Jack's voice suddenly came over the intercom system. Sam had patched it in, pulling off the headset from over her ears. "I'm losing power. Full port engine failure. Starboard at six zero percent."

Jonas looked behind him at Rose. She leaned her forehead still against the glass, but what he couldn't see were her eyes wide open in thought and concentration. She stared blankly down into the somewhat empty Gate Room, but she was listening intently.

"Preparing to ignite rocket booster." Jack's voice came again. "I'm losing velocity, Command, I'm going to start losing altitude."

"Velocity is 25,000 kilometers per hour… 28… He's gotta reach 40 and sustain it for at least 15 seconds now." Sam spoke up and shook her head at the monitors before her. Jonas looked back at Rose again. She hadn't moved a muscle. Hadn't even twitched. It worried him, but not as much as what was happening with Jack and the Stargate. So, Jonas looked back at the monitors again.

"Main engine burn at one zero zero percent. Velocity approaching 40,000 kilometers per hour. Altitude one two zero kilometers." Jack's voice erupted through the intercom again and only created more worry and panic in the Briefing Room. Sam began to count suddenly as the seconds ticked by. "Command, preparing to release the Gate. I'm burning out here."

"He's isn't going to make it. Velocity is slowing rapidly, he had to fire the rocket booster too early." Sam breathed out loud enough for the whole room to hear.

"It didn't work?" General Hammond asked and leaned on the table, looking to Sam for an answer.

"He's going to fall back to Earth, Sir." Sam replied and looked back at the monitors before her, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Anyone got any ideas…? Anyone want to wish me luck…?" Jack's sarcasm floated in through the intercom.

"Based on altitude, angle of ascent, and current velocity, he's gonna hit the coast of Europe in 35 minutes." Sam typed away at her monitors, eyes darting left to right and then back again as she quickly calculated through an idea she had.

"If he puts the 302 in a nosedive, he could cut his descent time in half." McKay spoke up and pushed himself from his own workstation and stopped at the table beside Sam. She looked to him and shook her head quickly.

"Why would we do that?" Jonas asked as he looked from Sam to McKay.

"Jack could release the Stargate into the Atlantic Ocean and hopefully it would sink low enough that the devastation would not be as vast." Rose piped up, still staring blankly into the Gate Room. Jonas snapped his head to look at her in surprise.

"Exactly." McKay looked at her, grim expression on his face.

"Will that do any good?" General Hammond looked between McKay and Rose, who still had her back to them.

"Enough that it's worth a shot." McKay replied as Sam shook her head in argument with him.

"What about that hyperspace thing?" Rose asked and turned around to face them all. Sam turned in her chair as the other stared.

"The hyperdrive?" Sam corrected and Rose nodded, uncaring about what it was called. "It didn't work."

"I thought it did, but that it was just you didn't know where in the galaxy you would end up?" Rose retorted and narrowed her eyes in question. "The window formed, but it was just unstable, yes?"

"Yeah, but we don't have any idea what would happen if we tried to open a hyperspace window within the atmosphere." Sam argued back.

"We're facing imminent death. What would **you** have us do?" Rose placed her hands firmly on her hips and stood straight. The room fell silent. Rose was… intimidating all of a sudden.

"Major," General Hammond spoke first and looked to Sam, "I can make the call."

"Do it, sir." Sam replied, meeting his gaze.

"You're both certifiable lunatics! This is deranged! You're talking about putting an interdimensional field around an already highly charged stargate with an unstable and completely unpredictable burst of energy!" McKay shouted and stood up from his seat. He got very close to Rose, who simply stared at him with blank eyes. "What I was suggesting has real tangible benefits."

"Perhaps it saves a few lives." Rose spoke evenly with a straight face. "If this new idea works, then we have the potential to save an entire planet… **your** planet."

"What chance do we have of that?!" McKay shouts, placing his hands on Rose's upper arms in panic and anger. Rose looks slowly from one of his hands on her to the other.

"Remove your hands from me before I break them." Rose bit out softly.

"Maybe we can reduce the risk a little." Jonas jumped in and pulled McKay's hands from Rose. He moved in between the two, keeping McKay back several feet from Rose.

"Oh yeah? How?" McKay asked frantically and sarcastically. It hadn't phased him what either Rose had said nor what Jonas had done in removing his hands.

"The instability of the Naquadria is relative to the size of the burst you're trying to extract." Jonas explained, peeking Sam's interest. McKay looked back at her.

"We don't actually have to send the Gate across the galaxy, do we?" He asked and Sam shook her head.

"Even a second in hyperspace potentially gets us millions of miles!" Sam replied and looked up at General Hammond, who nodded his head in agreement of what decision had been made. He walked a few feet to the red phone sitting in the Briefing Room and picks it up, dialing. Rose walked back to the window and stared out it once more. She felt someone step up beside her and could see in the reflection of the glass that it was Jonas. He was looking at her, just looking at her. She could guess why. She looked over at him and offered a small smile, which he returned with a nudge of his elbow.

"Rose does have some thorns." Jonas joked and took a sip from his travel mug. Rose gave a small laugh and shook her head. It was so stupid; him and that travel mug. It looked odd. Rose could hear Sam talking to Jack over the intercom, telling him what he was going to have to do. "So, that whole idea of the hyperdrive. Where did that come from?"

"Little voice inside my head." Rose replied, looking back through the window. Jonas his head with a little laugh, but Rose wasn't joking. She had felt something, like a tingle that covered her whole body and then she had the idea. It was as though someone else had put it there, inside her mind. It had felt foreign when it left her lips, but also familiar.

"Activating hyperspace generator now." Jack's voice reached Rose from the intercom. She looked back at the monitors that Sam sat in front of. The room went silent. Everyone was sitting on pins and needles.

"This is observer one." A voice came over the intercom again. "Visual confirmation. The X-302 has entered the hyperspace window."

Rose felt something touch her hand and looked down. Another hand held hers tightly in an awkward kind of embrace; palm to the back of her hand, fingers touching her palm. She followed the hand to a wrist to an arm to a body and then saw the face; Jonas. He was worried and there was no one else he had grown closer too at the SGC than Rose. She didn't mind. She felt the same way. She took her free hand and placed it on top of the others, locking them firmly together.

"This is observer one… there is no sign of a chute." The voice came over the intercom again. Rose shut her eyes, tingles in her hands as nerves raked her body. Jack was nowhere on the intercom, nowhere in anyone's sight; gone. The risk hadn't really sunk in on Rose until that moment. Jonas squeezed her hand as he spotted her sudden change.

"Please…" Rose breathed out, earning a look from Jonas. "Caireen protect him."

He had never heard her pray, at least, aloud, to any god before. He had wondered if she even had a religion, believed in any kind of god or spirit or whatever. It seemed strange to him since he didn't believe in any higher power. His people didn't either. After the Gou'ald, Thanos, had enslaved his people and they had won their freedom, they had turned to science. It was something they could see and touch, understand. It was easier that way for them.

"It worked! Deep space is estimating that the Gate detonated over 3 million miles from earth." Sergeant Davis shouted and looked around the room with a toothy grin.

"And Jack…?" Rose asked carefully and looked to Sam. She said nothing and looked away, unable to meet Rose's stare. She looked up at Jonas with an expecting gaze. He had no answer to give her and instead gave her hand a squeeze, telling her that Jack was a tough, stubborn man not willing to die in such a way. He received a small laugh from her and a nod of her head.

"This is observer two," the new voice came over the intercom. Rose and Jonas looked towards Sam and her monitors, "I have a visual on a chute. Moving in for confirmation. Mission command, the cockpit module is intact!"

"Told you; stubborn." Jonas spoke gently in her ear and she laughed. Rose relaxed and leaned to her left against Jonas, banging her forehead gently against his shoulder.

"Colonel O'Neill is conscious, and waving!" Observer Two confirmed.

"Good work everyone." General Hammond looked around the room at them all and nodded his head in approval. He walked into his office and picked up his phone, needing to tell the president that the world was not ending any time soon. Rose gently shook her head at Sam with a bright smile as Sam gave a small laugh.

"That was close." McKay pulled off the headset and tossed it onto the table. Rose looked to him, smiled and nodded her head. It had been close. Very, very close.

* * *

Jack walked through the halls with a bit of pep in his step. He was grateful to be out of the white and black jumpsuit that Mission Command had ordered he wear in the X-302. It had rubbed him the wrong way; literally. He whistled softly to himself as he headed for General Hammond's office.

"Jack!" The high pitched called caught him off-guard. What caught him more off-guard was the impact of Rose running at him and wrapping herself around him in a bear hug. "I'm so glad you're alright."

"Rose..." Jack gasped out, breathe escaping him. Rose loosened her grip and pulled back, looking up at him with a grin. Jack nodded his head with a somewhat sarcastic smile. It didn't deter her though and she just continued to grin up at him. "Heard you threatened Dr. McKay with bodily harm."

Rose's face fell.

"It was time someone put him in his place." Jack smiled at her and patted her on the shoulder, walking around her. Rose quickly followed behind him towards the elevator.

"Colonel! Colonel, do you have a moment?" Jonas called from down the hall. Jack hit the button to the elevator several times in succession, hoping the car would get there faster. It opened and Rose stepped in, hiding behind the corner. Jonas caught up as Jack was about to get in.

"Carter told me everything you did to help out. We all appreciate it, thanks a lot. See you later." Jack was quick and stepped into the elevator. Rose was blocking the floor buttons with her body however.

"Colonel," Jonas voice was firm, "Dr. Jackson is gone."

"Yeah, I noticed that." Jack's eye darted to his right at Rose, who stood hidden from Jonas' sight. Rose was not put off by Jack's stare. She continuously hit the button to keep the doors open to the elevator. She believed Jonas deserved a chance and she was sick and tired of trying to make Jack believe it too.

"Not a day goes by when I don't think about what happened. I stood by and watched while he saved my people from disaster. It should have been me who jumped through the glass, disarmed the device, and he's gone because I didn't." Jonas spoke quickly, earnestly. Rose could hear the pain in his words. He felt guilty and ashamed at his behavior. "You have to live with that and so do I."

"You want me to make you feel better?" Jack's words were harsh and bit into Jonas. Rose jumped slightly at his tone. Jack's eyes burned with guilt and shame himself. "It wasn't **your** fault. I don't blame you."

It grew quiet.

"If I could go back and change what happened, I would do that, but I can't." Jonas spoke up gently, softly. Rose stared at Jack with a sympathetic expression for Jonas. "All I can do is try and change what happens from now on. I don't want you to exonerate me, I just want to be given the opportunity to prove that I can make a difference."

The elevator doors closed as Rose had forgotten to press the button again. Jack stared at them, refusing to meet Rose's stare.

"Jack–"

"Don't." Jack bit out. He took a deep breath and sighed heavily, looking over at her for a brief moment. "Just don't Rosie."

Rose just stared at him for a long moment. The door to the elevator opened again and Jack stepped out. Rose caught him by the sleeve of his shirt. He didn't look at her.

"Henry David Thoreau once said that it is easier to forgive an enemy, than to forgive a friend." Rose spoke gently and then let his sleeve slip from her grasp. "What happened to Daniel was no one's fault. It was an accident; fate if you prefer, but, people cannot change unless given the opportunity to do so, Jack. Give Jonas the opportunity like you gave me and Sam and Teal'c and even Daniel… I promise you, Jonas will not disappoint you."

Jack walked away and the doors to the elevator closed, leaving Rose alone inside. She stared up at the ceiling and then closed her eyes. She prayed to whatever spirits were listening to help Jack see the truth. He needed to forgive Jonas, forgive himself, but she understood why it was so hard. Jonas was so very much like Daniel; curious, kind to a fault, an _egg-head_.

"If you're out there and you can hear me," Rose started and shook her head, "please Daniel; convince Jack. Jonas deserves a chance to redeem himself."

Rose opened her eyes and shook her head. Suddenly, she felt something on her shoulder; a warmth, a weight. She placed her right hand on her left shoulder as though expecting to find a hand there, but there was nothing. The warmth was there still though and so was the weight. Rose's lips extended into a small smile as she gave her shoulder a squeeze.

"Thank you…" She whispered and the warmth drifted away.

* * *

"Wait, what?" Rose gave a laugh and looked back at Sam, who held a bright smile on her face. Rose shook her head, completely confused by what she had been trying to explain to her. "You're government purchased a Stargate from a place called Russia? Your planet had two Stargates?"

"Oh just don't even try to understand anymore. I don't." Jack piped up, walking up beside the girls. Teal'c stood at the end of the ramp with his staff weapon in hand. They were all ready to ship out on their new mission through the new Stargate.

"Good luck, Colonel!" General Hammond called out as he entered the Gate Room.

"Thank you, Sir." Jack nodded at him as boot falls sounded from the hallway. Jonas suddenly appeared in the Gate Room, dressed from head to foot in the standard green fatigues with vest and helmet. Rose couldn't help but give a laugh. He looked somewhat ridiculous. She, herself, preferred her Gunda uniform; brown buckle boots, black campaigner leggings, black peasant top with a sapphire blue satin faux corset.

"How do I look?" Jonas asked her, pushing the helmet back so that he could see better. She looked him over, nodded her head and tried like Hell not to laugh again.

"Well…" she began and pulled the helmet from his head. Jack, standing back behind Jonas began waving his arms frantically. Obviously he was hoping Jonas would keep the ridiculous get up on. Rose shook her head at him and handed the helmet off to one of the other people in the room. Jack walked up to the ramp, 'tsking' her as he went and all of them fell in line. Teal'c all the way to the right with Sam, then Jack, then Rose and Jonas.

"Good guess on the green, Jonas." Jack commented, not looking towards him. Jonas looked to Rose and mouthed a 'thank you,' which she returned with a smile.

"SG-1, you have a go." General Hammond announced over the intercom. Rose looked back at the Stargate, blue and rippling. She took a deep breath, still questioning about what was happening on her own planet. Until something happened, there was nothing she could do except try to live her life. She looked down the line at them all, from right to left, ending on Jonas. He looked so excited, like a little kid.

 _Thank you, Daniel…_

"SG-1, move out." Jack ordered and they all walked through the gate, shooting across the galaxy.


	17. The Descent: Part 1

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose laid on the hard, cold floor of the cargo ship with her hands laced over her abdomen. She could feel Jonas' eyes burning into her from where he sat on the bench attached to the wall. She understood he was curious as to what she was doing on the floor, but it was hard to concentrate with him looking at her like a rat in a cage.

"Jonas, it's hard to concentrate when you're staring at me like that." She grumbled without opening her eyes.

"Sorry, it's just interesting." Jonas sat up from his hunched over position. "What exactly are you doing?"

"Deep conversations with the spirits of Christmas' past." Jack's voice floated from where he stood at the front of the cargo ship with Sam, Teal'c and Jacob.

"Jack!" Rose shouted and sat up, glaring at him. He looked over his shoulder at her and shrugged. Rose shook her head at him. How dare he make fun of her and her traditions?

"I meant no disrespect." Jack held up his hands in defense. Rose shook her head again and laid back down, readjusting herself.

"So what is it that you're doing?" Jonas finally asked, now that the subject had been raised.

"Relaxing." She lied to him and he knew it too. He sat back on the bench and leaned his head against the wall. Jack looked back at the two and shook his own head.

"Just tell him already." He grumbled out.

"She's not ready yet, Jack." Jacob spoke up gently, flying the cargo ship through space.

"It's not that big of a deal."

"Not to you, O'Neill." Teal'c jumped in. "For Rose, it is a much more secretive matter. On her planet there are few who share in her abilities to communicate with those who have passed."

"And you know this how?" Jack retorted, trying to catch Teal'c off-guard.

"I simply asked." Teal'c response was not what Jack had expected. He was deflated and looked back at Rose and Jonas, shaking his head again.

"Looks like your analysis was right, Sam. It's dead in space, but completely intact." Jacob announced, eyes looking through the nothingness at the Gou'ald mothership that sat still and alone.

"Has Anubis ever done anything like this before?" Sam asked, staring at the ship straight ahead.

"This is a first. It must have been a little crazy around the SGC when it showed up, huh?" Jacob looked to Sam and grinned, which Sam returned.

"Rose, Jonas!" Jack called back to them. Jonas stood up and offered a hand to Rose. She took it and stood up, straightening her clothing. The two walked closer and looked out the window at the mothership.

"It's just sitting there." Rose observed, taking notice that there were no other ships in the vicinity.

"It's in a stable planetary orbit. Shields and weapons are down, and it's emitting no EM of any kind." Sam explained as she looked down at a screen on the panel.

"Well, if they were going to attack Earth, they would have done it by now." Jacob surmises and looked around at them all. Rose looked to Jack, catching the strange look he was giving her. She then looked to Jonas beside her who held on his face a grin and wonderment.

"What are you smiling at?" Jack asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Well, it's just that it's my first time. **In space**." Jonas replied and looked between Rose and Jack. "We'd only begun to consider the possibility of space travel. To actually be out here is…"

"Amazing." Rose finished for him and he nodded at her. She smiled, having had the exact same feeling the first time she had been in one of these ships floating in space.

"Indeed." Teal'c agreed and smiled. Jack rolled his eyes and looked back at the mothership floating ahead of them.

"Until something goes horribly wrong." Jack mumbled.

"I'm not a hundred percent but," Sam spoke up as she tapped a few things on the panel, "this could be the same ship Anubis used to kidnap Thor."

"Now we know why they haven't attacked. There's no discernible life signs." Jacob broke into the conversation as he stared down at the panel before him. Rose walked up alongside him and looked down at it. There were no heat signatures of any kind. Exactly as she had surmised when she had been lying on the ground, feeling for anything _unnatural_. She felt a pair of eyes on her and looked to see Jack staring at her. She shook her head at him in a silent confession that she too had gotten nothing.

"All the escape pods have been jettisoned." Sam explained.

"This ship does not appear to have been damaged in battle." Teal'c observed, eyes narrowed at the ship.

"Power and life supports are functioning normally. There's just nobody on board." Jacob confirmed and turned in his seat to look at Jack. It all seemed a bit strange; too strange.

"Why would they abandon a perfectly good ship?" Jonas finally begged the question, looking around at them all. His eyes landed on Rose.

"They wouldn't." She replied and looked back at the mothership floating nearly a hundred yards ahead.

"Well, I suppose we should investigate then." Jack announced and clapped his hands. Rose knew that Jack had been excited when General Hammond had given them their orders. A mothership hovering over Earth with no signs of life? It was too good to be true.

"Rather than fly into a cargo bay, I recommend we use the transport rings to get us there until we get a better idea of what's going on." Jacob suggested as Jack was heading towards the back of the ship where Rose had bene lying down.

"Teal'c, radio Hammond. Let him know we'll have something in a couple of hours." Jack ordered as Rose, Jacob and Sam walked over to him. Major Davis and Doctor Friesen walked out from a back storage room and were waved over to the small group huddling.

"Jonas, stay with Teal'c." Jack ordered as the others prepared themselves to be beamed onto the ship.

"I don't understand." Jonas looked back at them with confusion. Jack looked to him and shook his head.

"I'm sorry. Stay here." He tried to clarify.

"I'm not going with you?" Jonas was still trying to understand.

"Not this time."

"Why? Colonel, I've studied every report, every specification, everything you have on Goa'uld motherships–"

"Because I gave you an order, Jonas." Jack snapped. Rose shared a look with Sam and then turned her gaze to Jonas. "I always have a reason I'm not required to explain. It's a military thing."

Jonas watched as Jack walked towards the others, who were preparing to leave the ship. He looked to Rose, hoping she would say something to convince him, but she said nothing. She only shook her head at him and mouthed, 'next time.' It wasn't her call whether Jonas went with them or stayed behind. She followed Jack's orders because she was a part of his team. Jonas was a part of the team too now. So, he had to follow orders as well. Admittedly, it was an easier concept for Rose since she had a military background.

The rings shot up from the floor and the group disappeared, reappearing on the mothership. Jacob leads them down several halls and then they stop at a garbled computerized sound coming through over the intercom.

"What is that?" Davis asked as the others tried to listen to what was being said.

"I can't make it out." Jacob replied and then waved at them to continue on. He led them all into Anubis' throne-room where Thor had been held captive. Rose hadn't been around for that. Sam had filled her in on who Thor was and the Asgards. Jacob walked to a control panel and began pressing buttons, trying to get an idea of what happened to the ship.

"Well, this is strange. The ship is operational, but before they left, they initiated a self-destruct sequence." Jacob looked over at Sam, who took the hint and stood at his side. She studied what he had up on the screen.

"It looks like the countdown is stuck."

"Stuck?" Rose asked and turned from the paintings on the walls. "How can it be stuck?"

"It just doesn't make any sense." Jacob mumbled and looked away from the screen. "The only way to stop a self-destruct is with a command override, but that would completely erase the sequence, not suspend it halfway."

"So, is the ship gonna explode or not?" Dr. Friesen asked, worry lingering in his voice. Rose rolled her eyes and placed a hand on her hip, looking about the room. She didn't quite understand why Jack decided that Dr. Friesen and Major Davis were good alternatives to Jonas and Teal'c other than he wanted two reliable people controlling the teleportation rings.

"Well, until we know why the countdown was suspended, we can't be sure it won't start up again. We need to get to the computer core and do a diagnostic." Jacob explained and began playing with the control panel.

"Carter. You and Davis. See if you can disable that self-destruct altogether." Jack ordered and walked over to the control panel, watching as Jacob continued the search. Sam nodded at Davis and they took off into the ship. Jack moved to Anubis' throne and sat down on it, relaxing into it.

"Jack, are you seriously considering salvaging this ship?" Jacob turned from the panel and stared at him. Jack slowly leaned forward, arms on the armrests.

"Why, yes Jacob. I am."

"This ship belonged to Anubis. What if it's some sort of Trojan Horse?"

"Trojan horse…?" Rose asked and looked between the two men.

"Basically a gift-wrapped box of destruction." Jack explained and looked to Jacob. "And they apparently did it wrong."

"Look, Jack. None of this makes any sense, so before you go slapping a US Air Force sticker on the side of this ship…"

"I agree with Jacob." Rose piped up again and looked to Jack.

"Oh, will you two stop?" Jack stood up from the throne and fixed his vest. "Obviously we gotta check things out around here, to see what happened before we do anything. But our standing orders are to recover technology that can help us defend against the Goa'uld. I'd say this ship falls under that heading, wouldn't you?"

Jacob and Rose looked to each other with sidelong glances.

"You know, sometimes I get a little concerned that you're gonna get my favorite planet wiped out." Jacob spoke first.

"Yes." Jack's tone changed and dripped with sarcasm. "What planet is that again?"

"Jack, that's not fair." Rose stepped closer, coming to Jacob's aid.

"If they wanted to scuttle this ship, and the self-destruct didn't work, their next logical option would be to sabotage the hyperdrive." Jacob brushed off Jack's question.

"Friesen, let's go." Jack ordered and was followed out of the room with the doctor. The garbled, computerized sound came over the intercom again, making Rose look around as though expecting a source.

"Jack told me a bit about you. Care to find out what that is somehow?" Jacob asked and looked over at Rose. She nodded her head and then left the room, heading into the hallway. She closed her eyes and listened for the garble. When it didn't come through she began heading through the halls with her hands palms out ahead of her and eyes still shut, searching for any signs of life.

* * *

Rose walked around for what felt like hours. She had gotten no sense that there were any lifeforms, dead or alive, on the ship besides the team.

"This is Carter, we're just outside the computer core. The door looks like it's been hit by several staff blasts." Sam's voice came in over the radio. Rose picked up the small box that sat attached the belt of her leggings. She hated it. It felt odd sitting there.

"That's interesting, because it's the only door I can't open." Jacob replied over the radio as Rose continued on walking. "The circuits are fused. It's almost as if there was a deliberate overload."

"It's starting to look more and more like a saboteur on board. Someone damaged the computer, and then sealed it off so they couldn't effect repairs." Sam announced and then the radio went silent.

"Rose?" Jack's voice came through the radio. She halted in her voyage and searched for the button on the box. She clicked it."

"I'm here."

"Meet me at Carter's location."

"Yes, sir." Rose released the button and then turned around, heading back the way she had come. Rose approached the turn and spotted Sam, Davis and Jack at the door to the room. There were multiple circular burns in the door consistent with that of a staff weapon like the one Teal'c wielded.

"Just in time." Jack spotted her as he placed the final C4 charge on the door. He grabbed Rose's arm and dragged her behind the corner again. Sam and Davis followed, pressing themselves as close to the wall as they could. Jack pressed the button to the remote detonator in his hand and the hallway exploded. The door was gone and a jagged hole was left in its place.

"Shall we?" Jack asked, ushering the three into the hole in the wall. "Jacob, we're in."

The walked down the darkened path until there began a small pink glow. Rose held back and examined the glow as it shot across the walls. She got a sharp pain in her head and placed a palm to her forehead. She suddenly got an image of a dark tunnel, perhaps a cave, and a blue-green glow. Shook it off and continued down the hallway after the others. They arrived at the mothership core. The pink glow came from some kind of mechanism that Sam began to play with.

Rose stopped at the entrance into the Core Room and looked back over her shoulder into the dark hallway. She swore something was there, watching her in the darkness.

"The computer log confirms that this is the same ship that Thor was aboard." Sam's voice brought Rose's attention back to the mission at hand. "Thor's brain was directly linked to this computer. Anubis may have grossly underestimated the power of an Asgard's mind."

"And?" Jack asked, arm resting on his weapon that was slung over on shoulder.

"And… it's possible that when his mind was linked, Thor was able to rewrite some of the ship's programming. Maybe even leave something behind." Sam looked at Jack, who looked at Rose behind Sam. She was staring over her shoulder again, expression blank. He walked over to her and stared out into the dark hallway.

"Something wrong?" Jack asked, knowing enough about her _abilities_ to recognize when she knew something. It was little things; prickles, a cold breeze, her sixth sense was much stronger than the average humans'. She called herself a 'Mysticus,' or a mystic.

"I'm not sure." Rose answered honestly and looked back at him. "There's something strange on this ship. I feel it."

"Where?"

"I'm not sure." Rose looked at Jack with worry and puzzlement. "It feels far away, but I know it's not. It's the damnedest thing."

"Dr. Friesen, this is Major Carter. We could use your assistance in the computer core." Sam's voice caught the attention of Jack and Rose. The lack of response from the other end of the radio caught their attention even more.

"Friesen, come in!" Jack snapped into his radio on his shoulder. "Jacob, have you seen Dr. Friesen?"

"Negative." Jacob replied over the radio.

"You scientists." Jack looked at Sam, shaking his head. "All of you stay here, I'll find him."

"It's a big ship, Sir." Sam called after him and looked to Rose.

"I think I know where he went." Jack replied and headed into the dark hall. Rose followed behind him quietly. The garbled noise comes from the intercoms again and causes Rose to lose track of Jack in the maze of halls.

"Jack?" She called out and turned down a hall. He was nowhere in sight and the lights were out, emergency lights the only source of sight. She roamed slowly, quietly, hoping to find him somewhere. It seemed more and more unlikely though. The soft green lights distorted her vision, causing her to see shadows on the walls.

"Carter. I want you, Rose and Davis back in the pel'tak with Jacob." Jack's voice came over the radio softly, whisperingly.

"What's going on, Sir?" Sam replied back.

"Friesen's dead." The line went quiet. "Jacob, come in."

Nothing.

Rose looked behind her at the way she had come. There was nothing there, but she could feel something. A cold chill ran down her spine, making her stand at attention. They weren't alone on the ship and now they were being picked off one by one.

"Jacob, do you read?" Jack asked again. Rose walked swiftly on tiptoes through the halls, heading back towards the pel'tak where Jacob was. "Jacob, come in. Jacob?"

Rose took off in a run on the balls of her feet. She was glad in that moment that her boots had been destroyed on the last mission. Instead she had on thin ballerina like shoes that tied up her legs. They were quiet, a second skin that aided her in moving quickly and silently.

"I've got him." Rose replied into her radio and ran at Jacob, who laid on the ground unmoving. She looked him over and spotted a staff blast on his right shoulder blade. "He's been hit by a staff blast."

"On our way." Jack replied. Within minutes he, Sam and Davis were there. Sam took over watching her father, who had woken only a mere moment before. Rose walked over to Jack and shook her head at him, knowing what he was going to ask. "So no visual on the perpetrator?"

"No, sir. He or they or whoever was gone by the time I got here." She replied and looked back at Jacob. He could have been dead by now. The symbiote that shared his body had been able to keep him alive though.

"Uh, guys?" Davis calls from where he stood at the control panel. "We're decelerating out of orbit and they've disabled the drive controls. We've got no way of altering course. We're going to crash."

"Teal'c, come in." Jack moved fast.

"O'Neill, you're approaching Earth's atmosphere." Teal'c voice came over the radio.

"Yeah, you know, we noticed that!" Jack snapped. They were all beginning to feel the motion. "You're gonna have to ring us outta here."

"Standing by." Teal'c confirmed and the line went silent.

"Oh no…" Rose breathed out, catching Jack's stare. She met it with panic. "The feeling… it's gone. They're gone!"

"Teal'c, we're heading to the ring room." Jack quickly radioed the two SG-1 members left on the cargo ship. There was no response. "Teal'c?"

"O'Neill, we have been attacked by Jaffa from the mothership." Teal'c replied and Rose relaxed a bit.

"What's your situation?"

"They are no longer a threat to us, but the ship has been damaged." Teal'c was a master at hiding his feelings, but even Rose caught the hesitation in his voice. "The crystals that allow us to receive ring transmissions have been destroyed and there is insufficient time to dock aboard the mothership."

"Well, I guess we're going in." Jack's sarcastic nature appeared again as he stared out the window at the quickly approaching Earth.

* * *

"I should have been with them…" Jonas suddenly spoke up in the Humvee to Teal'c. They were on their way to a Deep Submergence Rescue Vehicle on route from Pearl Harbor to try and rescue the rest of the SG-1 team from the mothership. It had been a while since they had received any sign of life from aboard it and now they were using drastic measures.

"Do you believe you could have prevented this from happening?" Teal'c asked carefully, sensing the guilt in Jonas' voice.

"Maybe. You don't think so?" Jonas looked over at him from across the empty middle seat. Teal'c stared at him for a long moment and then looked forward once more.

"It was an ambush. I believe your presence would have made little difference."

"Like on the Cargo Ship?"

"You could not have known those Jaffa would ring aboard ship."

"Yeah. I stood there! You saved my life like Dr. Jackson did back on my planet. I didn't do a thing! I can never do anything!" Jonas shook his head and looked out the window to his left in the Humvee. Teal'c looked at him with an eyebrow raised as Jonas sighed.

"It is my understanding that it was largely your idea that lead to the successful disposal of the other Stargate before it could be detonated." Teal'c looked straight once again, lights from cars passing by streaking across his features.

"It was Rose and I."

"She expressed otherwise when telling me." Teal'c quickly shut Jonas up with a hard stare. "You saved the lives of millions."

"That was different… an intellectual exercise. I'm talking about knowing what you can do in the heat of the moment when there is no time to think. Like you and Rose."

"One can never be certain until the opportunity presents itself. Rose understands this as well as I."

"So far, my track record isn't that great. Look at the both of you." Jonas almost scoffed. "You two save people all the time. You aren't afraid to make a move."

"That is because we have been taught that way. I was a Jaffa. Rose a warrior. We were taught to never show fear. To move when told without hesitation. There are many battles left to be fought, Jonas Quinn."Teal'c again looked across the seat at Jonas. He slowly met his gaze. "In the words of Rosalina, 'making a difference lies solely in the choices we elect. Bad choices bring bad difference. Good choices, good difference. Until you are faced with a choice, you will never know what kind of difference you can make or what kind of person you are."

"Rose said that?" Jonas looked at Teal'c, who nodded his head once with a smile. Jonas gave a look of approval and then they both turned to the front, lost in silence.

* * *

"How are you doing?" Jack looked over at Rose and Jacob from where he sat on the steps of Anubis' throne.

"Aside from the burns, I got a broken collarbone. Selmak's working on it." Jacob replied, wincing as he readjusted himself.

"You know, for guys with no life signs, those Jaffa did a bit of damage."

"They must have been trapped in the section of the ship that was sealed off. To stay alive as long as possible, they would have gone into a deep state of Kel-no-reem, slowing down their heartrate to one or two beats per minute. In that condition, the cargo ship's senses weren't sensitive enough to pick them up."

"Think there are any more running around?" Jack's question was pointed at Rose. She looked up at him without moving her head and just stared, sharp blue eyes piercing through him.

"I doubt it. My guess is the three that attacked me were on the computer core level. I let them out when I opened the door to allow Sam inside." Jacob continued as though not noticing the hard stare Rose sent Jack's way. Sam and Davis walked into the Control Room.

"Well, we've got life support operating at fifty percent. It won't be too comfortable in here, but at least we won't freeze to death… right away." Sam explained and looked down at Jack, who had refused to stand up.

"Can we fix the engines?" Jacob asked and looked up from his spot.

"Not a chance, and that's not our only problem." Davis replied and shook his head. All eyes moved to Sam for an explanation.

"We found evidence of structural damage on the lower levels. Probably a result of the impact." Sam began.

"How bad?"

"I'm not sure." Sam continued. "The exterior pressure's pretty severe, especially on the lower levels of this ship. It wouldn't take much to compromise the hull."

"Well, help will be on the way." Jack confirmed and leaned back a little, getting comfortable.

"There's also the matter of the self-destruct sequence frozen half way through its countdown." Sam reminded him. He sat up straight again.

"You haven't turned that off yet?" Jack questioned, sarcasm in his voice.

"No, Sir. And I'm not sure we should even try."

"Why?"

"Well, first the door to the computer core was locked, and then when the Jaffa tried to blast their way in, the entire section was sealed off and life support was shut down."

"By who?" Jacob jumped in.

"It's _whom_." Jack corrected him, earning a smack from Rose.

"Actually, Sir, it's more like **what**." Sam corrected them both.

"What?" Jack looked back at her incredulously.

"The virus Thor left behind." Davis answered as he walked over and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Exactly. What if it was trying to defend itself?" Sam looked around at them all.

"So Thor leaves behind a virus that forces Anubis to abandon his ship, and then this virus defends itself against the Jaffa Anubis left behind to blow this ship?" Jacob was playing catch-up.

"Or maybe it was left here so we could find it." Sam explained and looked to Jack. "Sir, with your permission, I'd like to return to the computer core."

"Rose'll go with you. So will I." Jack announced and stood up. Rose followed suit, exiting the Control Room with them. They hadn't gotten far before the garbled computerized sound floated over the intercom again.

"What is that?" Rose finally asked, hoping someone had an answer.

"Well, Major Davis is right. It's definitely coming through the ship's intercom. Maybe the virus is trying to talk to us." Sam replied, but Rose couldn't tell whether or not she was trying to be funny. Her eyes looked sidelong at Jack, who shrugged his shoulders. They were stopped at a closed door at the end of a hallway. A small puddle of water trickled from underneath and had spread over the floor. Jack walked up to the door, looked it over and then looked at the water trickling from underneath.

"What the hay?" He asked and picked up a foot to examine the water.

"Dad, we've got evidence of flooding here." Sam spoke into her radio.

"Standby." Jacob replied as Rose walked closer to the door. She placed her hands on it and looked around at the seams. The metal was ice cold to the touch. "There's been a hull breach on the engineering level."

"But we aren't anywhere near that level." Rose spoke up and looked back at Sam.

"Dad, we're nowhere near the engineering level." Sam clicked the radio and they all waited for a response. Rose walked passed Sam, back the way they had come several feet. She looked down the hall as though half expecting either water or more Jaffa to appear.

"It looks like seawater penetrated into the central access shaft, and now the pressure's pushing it up through the core of the ship. We're flooding from the inside." Jacob sounded almost distraught. Rose, Jack and Sam all looked to each other with concern. Rose heard a noise and spotted the doors in the hall beginning to close, separating Rose from Sam and Jack.

"The doors are closing!" Rose shouted and tried to run to it, but she was too late.

"Dad, the doors closed behind us." Sam radioed Jacob, hoping he would be able to stop it. She ran to the panel by the door that separated them from Rose and tried herself to open it, but it was firmly shut. They were locked in and Rose was separated from them, locked in her own section alone.

"It's a security measure. All doors are sealed around the breach. I'll try to open it from here." Jacob replied and then the line went quiet. "This could take some time, Sam."

"Rose?" Jack called as he stepped up to the closed door. "Can you hear me?"

"Yes!" Rose called back, searching frantically for a way out. She was trapped, in a cage, all alone with water spilling into it. "There's water in here too, coming from a vent!"

"Stay calm!" Jack called back and looked to Sam, shaking his head.

"I'm sorry, Sir. I can't bypass the system locally." Sam answered his unasked question.

"Jacob?" Jack radioed.

"Jack, without the proper codes, I can't get access to the security program." Jacob replied quickly, worry filling his voice. "Jack, I'm going try to find a back door to the program."

"How long's that gonna take? I'm looking at some major shrinkage here." Jack replied as the water was almost at waist level in the section he was in. He worried how Rose was doing. Was the water charging in faster? Slower?

"I don't know, this is kind of a unique situation. Give me a few minutes." Jacob spoke quickly and then his voice faded away. Jack looked to Sam, seeing her concern.

"How long do you figure it'll take for this thing to fill up?" He asked her and she shook her head, trying to calculate.

"A few more minutes." She answered in a breath.

"Yep." Jack walked to the door and banged on it, hoping to get Rose's attention. "Hey! You hear all that?!"

"Yes!" Rose replied, looking frantically around the prison. The water was ice cold, stinging her skin as it rose higher and higher. It was above her hips now, her lower half losing feeling. It was rising much quicker than she had expected it too. Soon it was at chest height and Rose was treading water. If she had any extra clothing to shed she would have, but it would not have done much.

Suddenly, the water was over her head. The palms of her hands sat flat against the ceiling as she tried to find any source of an opening. She spotted a pocket of air and moved to it, waiting until she had used all her breath before taking the air from the pocket. It wasn't much, but it would give a little more time.

She frantically swam and searched for a way out. She swam to the control panel on the door and began to push buttons, having no idea what she was doing. She screamed helplessly beneath the water, banged on the door the best she could. She swam to the vent and began to tug on it, hoping to pry it off and try her chances swimming through it.

Rose began to sink to the floor of the section. Rose's gaze darted left to right; searching, frantically searching for an escape. There was none. She was trapped. She noticed that the floors and walls were decorated in gold and blue, but slowly their colors began to fade. Her eyes locked on a light above her attached to the wall. Its yellow-white glow transfixed her as everything else seemed to darken around her; tunnel vision.

The scene felt so familiar… like it had all happened before.

She saw it. The moon in the night sky, the stars, the surface of the water. The memory came in sharp, painful strikes to her head. The thing on her leg, dragging her deeper and deeper. The figure standing on top of the Falls. Their hand outstretched towards her. The glowing blue light that emitted from that hand…

Rose's lungs began to burn as her chest tightened. All the air from her lungs was spent. Her body jerked, mouth agape as her body tried desperately to inhale air. All it got was salty water that burned on its way to her lungs and sat like a fiery rock.

… _Daniel…_

… _Gaenor…_

… _Mother…_

She tried hard to keep her mind going. Her eyes grew wide, catching a glimpse of blood diffusing into the water before her.

 _I'm dying… again… and no one can save me this time…_

Suddenly, everything stopped. Arms spread out, hair floating behind her; Rose stilled. It was like she was frozen in time, hanging motionless in the icy water.


	18. The Descent: Part 2

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

"Sam!" Jacob stared blankly at the screen. There was nothing he could do. "Jack, Rose! Come in!"

There was no response. He lowered the radio, but then suddenly it crackled.

"Jacob, this is Teal'c. We are on board the ship." Teal'c replied over the line as Jonas crawled out through the escape pod tube.

"Teal'c!" Jacob shouted over the radio. "Sam, Rose and Jack are in trouble. Main computer level."

"Dad! This is Sam." Sam's voice came over the radio. "We're okay. We're fine."

"Thank God! Sam, you really had me worried." Jacob breathed, genuine relief washing over him and into his voice. He closed his eyes and placed a hand to his chest, heart slowing to a normal beat.

* * *

"Tell him I take back everything I was thinking when I was underwater." Jack piped up and then gave a series of coughs. He moved to the door that separated them from Rose. He banged on it, but there was no reply. So, he banged on it again, but again there was no response. He looked back at Sam, who shared his concern glance.

"Rose!" Jack called out and waited for a reply again. He was greeted with silence. He banged on the door again and cursed under his breath. "Dammit Rose! Answer me!"

Again nothing. Rose wasn't answering or knocking back. As Jack looked back to Sam he wondered whether or not the doors had opened for her too.

"Dad, we think Rose is trapped in the section beside ours. Can you open it?" Sam asked over the radio. Jack banged on the door again, calling out to Rose again and again. She didn't respond. Sam could see Jack becoming desperate as he kicked the door with his bad leg, grabbing hold of his knee.

"I didn't do anything, Sam. The security protocol erased itself." Jacob replied earnestly as he searched through the control panel.

"How? That's impossible!" Sam argued, confused by what was happening aboard the ship.

"I don't know." Jacob replied and the line went quiet.

"Who cares?" Jack snapped and then tugged her along behind him. "Let's go to the other side of that door."

They walked and walked, but couldn't find the other door. They couldn't even get close.

"Jack, I don't even see that section on the map." Jacob's voice came through the intercom. "Most likely, when the protocol erased itself it let Rose out too and she took off to try and find a way to you guys. She's probably on her way to the pel'tak now."

Jacob's explanation seemed all too possible and realistic. It didn't sit well with Jack for that exact reason. Nothing was ever that simple. Especially when it came to his team. The simple things were the ones to watch out for.

"Hey!" Jack called out as he and Sam spotted Teal'c and Jonas heading down the hall. They jogged to catch up with them. Jonas and Teal'c stopped, spun around and walked closer to them. Jack noticed Rose wasn't with them. Jonas noticed the same of them.

"You guys all right?" Jonas noticed their drenched forms. His gaze lingered on Jack, expression begging the question of where Rose was.

"Ah, a little wet, a little chilly." Jack's sarcasm was back once more as he raised his left leg and rubbed his knee. "Knee gets a little stiff in cold water, you know?"

"We have a rescue submarine docked with the ship." Teal'c spoke up, stepping up beside Jonas.

"We can't leave yet." Sam interjected and shook her wet head.

"Why not, Major Carter?" Teal'c inquired, obviously interested in her reasons.

"Something else is definitely going on here. We need to figure this out first." She explained, looking around at them all. Jack didn't like it, but finally he nodded his head in agreement.

"And where Rose is?" Jonas objected with force. He looked from Jack to Sam and then back again. "She is missing, isn't she? Otherwise she would be with you two right now."

"The security system started shutting off sections that were becoming flooded." Sam explained and shook her head, water droplets falling to the floor. "We got separated."

"For the time being. Separated for the time being… Rose will find us though. She always does." Jack stared at him and hard. He didn't like it any more than Jonas did, but what could they do? Sure, they could search the whole ship, but they might not ever cross paths with her. Or she might be in the pel'tak with Jacob right at that moment. "We'll head back to Jacob. She'll meet us there."

Jack was trying to convince himself more than Jonas that Rose was safe.

When they got to the pel'tak, Davis was working on a laptop computer to try and figure out what the garbled computerized noise was that had been playing in a loop over the intercom. Jack and Sam sit down on the throne steps with Jacob and Jonas standing nearby. The main lights were all out and only the emergency ones shone. The blue waters of the ocean banged against the window of the Control Room.

There was tension between Jack and Jonas that everyone could feel. Each one took a turn staring at the other. Jonas questioned why Jack hadn't started a search for Rose while Jack questioned why Jonas cared so much about her.

"It's definitely a voice. Give me a second, I'll see if I can clean it up." Davis announced as he typed away.

"Why would it be so distorted?" Jonas asked as he rubbed his right wrist in an anxious motion. Rose still hadn't shown up yet. It had been nearly a half hour since he and Teal'c had gotten on the ship. He had hoped that she was with Jacob, but she hadn't been when they arrived and Jacob hadn't seen or heard from her either.

"Anubis probably tried to shut it off." Jacob replied, looking over his shoulder at Jonas.

"Sam?" Jack asked, eyes moving from Jonas to look over at her.

"Well, the security program that locked us in that corridor didn't just shut down by itself." She explained and looked around at them all.

"You think this virus Thor left in the ship's computer is acting intelligently?" Jacob asked, almost incredulously at the idea.

"If that door hadn't opened, Colonel O'Neill and I would have drowned." Sam replied, looking at him sharply.

"It knows who you are." Jonas surmised, seeming slightly impressed as he looked around the Control Room. He stopped and ran a hand over his mouth. Had the computer recognized Rose and released her from the section she had been trapped in? Or was she still there like a fish in a tank?

"I got it!" Davis shouted as a grin slid across his face. His laptop showed a pulse line as the voice repeated its message over the intercom.

"I am using the internal communication system to synthesize my voice." Thor's voice cleared up on the intercom. Teal'c looked over at Jack.

"Thor spoke the same words to O'Neill and I when we were imprisoned aboard this vessel." He explained, looking around at the others.

"Sir, maybe what we've been calling a virus isn't a virus at all. Maybe it's Thor." Sam sounded slightly excited at the thought.

"We got him off this ship months ago." Jack began to argue.

"Not before Anubis was able to download his mind into the computer core." Sam cut him off at the point. "Now, if his consciousness remained intact, he would be an independent entity operating within the system."

"His mind took control of the vessel." Jacob breathed out. The idea sounded so much stranger aloud.

"Way to go Thor!" Jack clapped his hands together, but no one shared his immediate excitement.

"Sir, the Asgard said that Thor was on life support but there was little chance that he'd come out of it." Sam began her idea slowly so that he could follow along with her logic. "If we can download his consciousness from the computer, the Asgard can transfer it into a new cloned body."

"If that's what you want to do, Sam, you'd better move fast." Jacob butted in. "The computer core isn't flooded yet, but it's only a matter of time."

"Wait a second." Davis jumped up from where he sat, laptop in his hands. "If Thor is really in control of this ship, then he is the only thing keeping the self-destruct on hold. We remove that consciousness, the countdown will start up again."

"How much time will we have left when the countdown resumes?" Sam asked and turned towards Teal'c for the answer.

"Approximately seventeen minutes." He answered.

"That gives us plenty of time to get out of here after we've got Thor."

"And Rose right?" Jonas piped up and looked around at them all, "She's still not back yet and we haven't heard anything over the line. Everyone seems very calm about the fact that she's just basically disappeared. You said she got separated from you when the level started to flood. Are you even sure she got out? She could still be there for all we know."

"She didn't…! We're not…!" Jack fought with how to put to words what he wanted to say. First, he wanted to smack something. "Rose had to of gotten released when we did. Jacob said it himself; the security protocol erased itself and opened the doors, releasing the water. She's probably just lost on aboard at the moment and her radio was ruined in the water. She will _find_ her way **here**."

The room fell into an uneasy silence. Jonas stared at Jack, not liking the answer. He felt they should be searching for her. Making sure she was safe before they bothered trying to rescue the consciousness of Thor.

"Rose could be in trouble." Jonas finally spoke out and turned his gaze on Jack again. "Or worse."

"Or she could be perfectly fine." Jack retorted shortly. He wanted to believe his words, but the longer they went without seeing or hearing from Rose, the more he doubted her safety.

Davis looked around at the SG-1 team. He cared little about whatever was happening with them at the moment, "I know that Rose and Thor were friends of yours, but they are both dead a–"

Jonas rounded on Major Davis, grabbed hold of his military issued jacket and pushed him up against the wall.

"Hey! Hey, hey!" Jack shouted, watching as Jonas pinned Major Davis to the wall. Teal'c stepped up beside Jonas and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Take it back." Jonas growled at Davis, face construed in anger. Davis was intimidated, caught off-guard by the extreme reaction. Jonas had snapped. Rose was one of the only people at the SGC that hadn't looked at him as Daniel's killer. She had been one of the only people who sought to welcome him, befriend him; accept him. To hear she was dead and he was back to being enemy number one was too much too soon. "Take. It. Back."

"Look, I'm sorry Jonas. She was trapped along with Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter. But Rose has been gone for nearly an hour now. Jacob even had said that he couldn't see the section she was trapped in on the ship's schematic." Davis started as Jonas released his hold on him. He quickly ripped his hands away, Teal'c leading him back with the hand on his shoulder. Davis looked over at Jack and Jacob, "This is a Goa'uld mothership. Think about it. If we allow it to blow up, there'll be nothing left to salvage. This is a major find. We can't allow personal feelings to get involved."

"Jack," Jacob spoke up and looked to the Colonel, "this ship is never going to fly again. I'd say having the Supreme Commander of the Asgard Fleet owe you one is more valuable."

"And knowing our friend is alive and safe." Jonas shot a look of death towards Davis, who seemed intimidated by it. Jack was slightly impressed, but he wasn't about to let Jonas know or see that. If Jonas hadn't of said anything when he did, he probably would have.

"Yeah all right! Next mothership, we keep, okay?" Jack slapped his knees and stood up from where he sat on the stairs of the throne. "Jonas, take Davis and Jacob back to the Sub. Wait for us there.

"Colonel, I'd like to assist in finding Ro–"

" _Jonas._ " Jack began and turned towards the newest member of the team. He didn't need to finish his sentence.

"I'll take them back to the sub." Jonas confirmed.

"Thank you." Jack gave a cynical smile and turned away from him. He, Sam and Teal'c left the pel'tak and headed for the Core Room.

* * *

Rose floated weightlessly in the icy water. Her golden hair drifted like strands of silk around her head; a golden halo. Her skin was white, porcelain like with visible signs of blue and deep purples from the biting cold. Her eyes were wide, the sclera blood red and pooling around her irises. It made her eyes lurid.

The doors had not opened for her like it had for Jack and Sam. The water had not receded. She had not been able to cough up water from her lungs, take in fresh air. Walk away with nothing more than a haunting memory of what could have happened.

No… Rose's doors had stayed shut. It had kept her prisoner in her underwater cage as the water had risen well above her head. She had drowned, reliving the first time she had died at the Falls. This time thought, she had been trapped in a metal box with no hope of escape.

The light behind her, yellow-white, glowed ominously on the wall. It seemed to grow brighter and brighter, white turning blue. It engulfed the cage until nothing could be seen anymore.

And then Rose was gone…

* * *

As Jack, Sam and Teal'c entered the Core Room, Teal'c looked behind himself with a suspicious glance. He could have sworn he felt something pulling him in another direction down the hall. It felt familiar, like an old friend leading him somewhere.

Sam quickly worked on the computer. She then removed a drive from the computer and held it up with a small grin, "Here he is!"

"You sure you got all of him in there? He's a smart guy, you know?" Jack's humor was lost on them for the moment as a computerized, deep voice came on over the intercom. Not Thor's voice. This voice was Jaffa.

"The self-destruct has been reactivated." Teal'c announced, looking back at them.

"Let's go." Jack motioned with a hand for them all to leave. However, back in the hall there was nowhere to go. The door was closed again.

"This door should not be closed." Teal'c announced the obvious as Jack cursed under his breath.

"The corridor must have flooded." Sam tried to think of another reason, but there was none.

"Jacob, our exit is blocked." Jack spoke over the radio. "We need another way around."

"Jack! All the other passageways into that section were already flooded. There is no other way around!" Jacob yelled back at him through the radio. "Jack, I'm going back to the Pel'Tak see if I can figure something out."

"Negative, get that sub a safe distance from this thing." Jack ordered, lowering his hand from the radio. Rose crossed his mind. He closed his eyes, cursing in his mind, and then sighed. His job came with tough decisions. Decisions he would rather not make.

"Understood."

* * *

Major Davis, Jonas and Jacob ran into the Embarkation Room where the escape pod tubes resided. A seaman stood waiting for them.

"The ship's self-destruct has been activated. We need to get the DSRV as far away as possible." Jonas explained to the seaman he and Teal'c had left waiting there for their return. He then looked back at Jacob and nodded once at him.

"Jack, we're at the sub. What's your status?" Jacob asked into the radio. He could see Jonas anxiously pacing out of the corner of his eye.

"Here's our plan, Jacob. We're going to take a couple of Death Gliders." Jack replied over the radio and caused Jacob and Jonas to share a look of disbelief.

"Jack, a Glider isn't designed to operate underwater."

"It's our only shot." Sam interjected over the radio.

"Uh, all right, all right." Jacob replied and rubbed his forehead hard as he tried to think. Jonas stood watching and listening, arms crossed over his chest. A nervous habit he had picked up from a friend that he desperately was worrying about. "Umm… you'll have to activate the compartment's force field to stop the flooding. Now, those systems went off-line after the crash."

"I know. I'm trying to reroute the power from here." Sam replied over the radio. A thought struck Jacob. He looked over at Jonas.

"What is it?" Jonas asked and moved closer.

"Glider bays have force-fields that allow ships to go in and out without having to depressurize the compartment. If she can't get it online, she won't be able to open the doors without flooding the hanger." Jacob explained as the situation became clear to Jonas.

"Right…!" Jonas turned away and slapped his hand hard against the nearest thing to him, cursing under his breath.

"Sam?" Jacob called over the radio.

"Jacob, I want you to get that sub to a minimum safe distance." Jack's voice replied, giving strict orders.

"Understood." Jacob looked to Jonas. "Let's go."

"No." Jonas shook his head crossly. He wasn't leaving yet. He got an idea. "There's an auxiliary control panel on this deck. I could reroute the power from there."

"How do you know?"

"Cause I've gone over the schematics of these motherships a dozen times, and I'm a very quick study."

"Yeah? Well, where is it?"

"Don't wait for me." Jonas took off running down the hall and turned the corner with Jacob calling after him. Jonas was on a mission. Not only could he reroute the power for Sam, but he could probably open the door to the section where Rose had been in.

"Jack." Jacob called over the radio as he stared down the hall Jonas had gone.

"Jacob, will you PLEASE get outta here?" Jack replied in earnest.

"We are, but Jonas went off to try to get the force-field online from a relay panel on this deck. Listen… good luck."

* * *

Jonas ran as fast as he could through the halls to the Auxiliary Control Room. He had memorized every hall, every level; everything. He skidded to a stop before a door and quickly began to pull off his unnecessary clothing. He moved to a panel by the door he had come through and tapped several buttons, releasing the door to close. Then he moved to the already closed door as he stripped off the extra outer shirt and took off his boots and socks.

He grabbed hold of the wall the best he could and braced himself before taking a large, deep breath and pressing the final button. The door opened and the section quickly filled with icy water. Jonas breathed and breathed, fighting the biting cold that struck his body in waves as more and more water plunged inside the section.

When the door was high enough, he took a deep breath, stopped the door from opening more, and then dove beneath the water's surface. He swam beneath the door and into the Auxiliary Control Room. He found the control column and began to rearrange the crystal modules. He pulled himself to the other side of the column and began to rearrange more crystal modules. He pressed two buttons, which illuminated blue and then something caught his eye.

Something floated off in the corner of his eyes, glittering gold and black in the emergency lights. Jonas looked and saw Rose's ghostly form wavering in the motion of the waters. Her eyes were closed and her skin was smooth and free from any signs of damage.

Jonas swam to her and hovered before her. He patted her cheek, but she didn't respond. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close, swimming with her at his side. He got them into a corridor and to a panel on the wall. He activated it and swam away with her still tightly at his side. He stopped and suddenly the transportation rings from the floor shoot up, covering the two.

He turned her towards him and held her close to his body, resting his chin on her shoulder. One arm secured her around the waist while the other went up and hand latched onto her shoulder. They dropped abruptly to the floor, the water that had engulfed them fell around them as they too fell to the floor. Jonas gasped for air and then sat up, looking over at Rose.

She laid unmoving.

Jonas patted her cheek and when she still didn't move he lowered an ear to her lips and then to her chest. He heard nothing. No breath. No heartbeat. He pulled himself onto his knees and began chest compressions; one, two, three, four, five…

"Come on Rose." Jonas spoke to her, but still she laid unmoving. Jonas finished the thirty compressions and then plugged her nose, pressing his lips to hers. He breathed air into her lungs, feeling her chest rise with his other hand. Still nothing. So he began the process again. Then again, but still there was nothing to indicate that Rose was still there.

"Come on Rose!" Jonas began compressions again and felt something crack beneath the weight of his hand; a rib. Jonas pulled back and took a deep breath, preparing to expand her chest cavity with air. "Dammit Rose, breathe!"

Another breath. More compressions. He continued on and on and on, but still there was nothing. Rose laid there before him unmoving as though in a deep sleep that he could not seem to wake her from. He closed his eyes and placed his hands on his thighs, feeling them burn from kneeling in the position for so long.

Suddenly Rose coughed, choking on water that her lungs were trying to expel. Jonas quickly opened his eyes, watching the water gurgle up from her mouth and spill over her face. He rolled her to her side to allow the water an easier route. After a moment, the gurgling ceased and she coughed incessantly, heaving in fresh air to her burning lungs. She slowly sat up with Jonas' help and he turned her shoulders to face him, looking her over. She opened her eyes, sapphire meeting stormy blue as she tried to clear her throat of lingering salt water.

She finally settled the coughing, but her throat burned and her chest stung. She was cold and wet and she began to shiver. Jonas placed his hands on her arms and rubbed, hoping to produce some kind of warmth. He too was freezing. Rose's hair stuck to her face and chest in awkward ways. Jonas reached out to her and brushed her hair back from her face. His hand rested on her cheek, thumb mindlessly rubbing over her icy skin.

She reacted without thinking and launched herself at him. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck, hiding her face in the crook of his neck. He wrapped his arms around her, tighter than he had expected too. He felt a sense of inexplicable relief. He hadn't realized just how worried he had been for her safety.

"What happened…?" Jonas breathed out finally and tried to pull back to look at her, but she refused to release him yet. She shook her head, unable to put to words what had happened. She was confused; in shock. She remembered everything. The White City. Her escape. The Phantom that pursued her through the Forest. The figure on the cliff of the Falls. She tightened her hold on him, fingers digging into him.

"Jack, Sam and Teal'c are waiting at the Glider Bay." Jonas told her and pulled back, standing. She grabbed his arm instinctually and stared up at him in panic.

"Please don't leave me."

"Rose," Jonas knelt before her and shook his head. He couldn't believe she felt like she needed to ask that of him. They had grown close over the last several months. "I'm not gonna leave you. Us aliens gotta stick together, right?"

Rose felt tears prickle her eyes and nodded her head, smiling forcing its way to her lips unsteadily. She took Jonas' hand without an offer and he looked down at the gesture. Her slender hand seemed to fit perfectly into his. He looked back at her, meeting her gaze once more. He felt a wave of nervousness washed over him; a different kind of nervousness.

"We should go." He announced, clearing his throat after her and then tightened the hold on her hand. He led her down the hallways, knowing the ship completely and then they ran when the countdown floated over the intercom. Rose was weak and shivered from the cold. It made Jonas remember how cold and wet he was too.

They spotted the others down a hallway before the opened door to the Glider bay. Jonas tugged Rose along with him as he tried to run faster. He looked over at her, seeing the exhaustion washing over her. She only needed to make it to the bay and then she could collapse and he would take care of her. Silently, he promised her that. He would take care of her.

"Wait! Wait! Did it work?" Jonas called out, catching the team's attention.

"We're about to find out." Jack replied as they approached, hand in hand. He said nothing about it and looked to Teal'c, who raised an eyebrow in question. They had known the two had grown close. That much was obvious. They hadn't realized _how_ close.

"Where were you?" Jack asked pointedly, staring at Rose and her drenched form. She opened her mouth to reply, but couldn't find the words.

"I found her on my way to the Auxiliary Control Room." Jonas spoke up for her. It was somewhat true. Jack narrowed his eyes and wondered just how much was the truth exactly.

"Uh huh…" Jack was not too convinced. "Shall we?"

Jack motioned to the Glider Bay and Teal'c and Sam headed in. The countdown over the intercom continued as the rest of SG-1 stepped into the bay. They headed straight for a pair of Death Gliders.

"Teal'c and Sam in that one!" Jack ordered and pointed to a Glider. He walked up to another, "Jonas and Rose, with me!"

Jonas climbed in first and took the back seat. Rose stopped, not knowing where she was supposed to sit. These were built for two, but there were three people.

"Get in Rose!" Jack ordered and gave her a push towards Jonas. "Since you two are so chummy…"

Rose got the message and sat across Jonas' lap, feet hovering over the floor. She tucked her shoulder between his head and the seat as she felt his arms wrap around her to ground her for takeoff.

"Listen, if we don't survive this," Jack began as he started the Glider, "thanks Jonas."

Jack meant it for more than just helping them escape form the mothership. Jonas had been the only one who fought for Rose. Jack, as hard as it was, had been prepared to make the hard choice to leave without finding Rose. He was ready to believe in something so painful as the reality that Rose was dead and a search would have killed the rest of his team.

"You're welcome." Jonas replied, knowing exactly why Jack was thanking him. He turned his head and looked at Rose for a brief moment. She wanted to smile but she couldn't. Too many thoughts raced through her mind, too many memories…

The hatch of the Glider closed and Rose crouched slightly on Jonas' lap to keep her head from it. She leaned her forehead against his jaw and closed her eyes. Her left hand found his shoulder and gripped a fistful of his wet black shirt.

Both Gliders took off. The flight was bumpy and jostled them.

"Hang on!" Jack called out as an explosion occurred behind them, propelling them out of the water before another larger explosion came up from the sea from the mothership. Soon they were high in the air above the clouds and safe from harm.

"Everybody all right?" Jack asked, trying to turn in his seat to look back at Jonas and Rose. He spotted Sam and Teal'c's Glider pulling up alongside them and waved. Rose tried to nestle herself closer to Jonas and felt his hold on her tighten protectively.

"This is Jacob. We're a little seasick down here, but we're in one piece too." Jacob's voice came over the radio. "What about Jonas? …Rose?"

"All members of SG-1 **present** and **accounted** for." Jack replied with a smile on his lips. "Teal'c, take lead."

Teal'c saluted Jack and then shot his Glider out of sight.

"Whenever you're ready…" Jonas breathed out to Rose for only her to hear. She opened her eyes and stared out at the sky and clouds they flew by. She knew what his words meant. He had told her before that whenever she was ready to talk, she could find him waiting to listen. It was comforting to know and now she was ready. She needed to confide in someone.

She remembered everything that had happened before, during and after being thrown through the Stargate. She knew exactly why she couldn't go home. Not yet.

"Okay…" Rose replied and closed her eyes again, relaxing in his arms.


	19. Going Insane

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

It had been three weeks since SG-1 had escaped from the Gou'ald mothership. Everyone had been looked over multiple times when they had gotten back to Stargate Command. Dr. Frasier had granted them all with a clean bill of health, but there was something… Rose had felt it. Deep within her something was wrong. She couldn't place a finger on it, but she knew something was there.

She soon checked it off as nothing after having gone back to Dr. Frasier several times, asking her to look her over. Nothing her blood. Nothing in MRIs, sonograms, etc. There was simply nothing there to be found in any kind of test. So Rose went back out with the team.

She had kept a distance though. Quietly lost in her thoughts when they ventured out on new missions. It had begun to worsen on their mission to Antarctica where they were to aid in the study of a humanoid woman that had been found in the ice. It continued to digress when they followed a lead on the missing Dr. Richard Flemming in Oregon.

Inability to concentrate…

Migraines…

Loss of appetite…

Dizzy spells…

Something was wrong and she knew. Jonas knew it too.

Jonas looked into General Hammond's office from the Conference Room. He and the rest of the team sat around the table, awaiting their next mission. Jonas' eyes never flinched from Rose and where she stood before Hammond's desk. She looked beaten down and tired. Her lips moved, but Jonas was unable to read what she was saying. General Hammond's expression expressed surprise and worry. Soon, their meeting was over. Rose turned to leave his office and caught sight of Jonas' stare. Their eyes met and she broke away first, briskly exiting Hammond's office and heading down the hall.

She hadn't spoken more than the niceties to him since they had returned. She hadn't spoken to anyone really. She was estranged from the team even when she was with them. He had noticed her constant daydreaming spells before, but… it had changed while they were in Antarctica. He had first spotted it there. She had stared out the base's main doors, standing so still and so silently for so long. She never got cold or hungry or tired. She just… stared. Blankly into the blinding whiteness of the snow and ice. She was lost to them, to the world around her. Lost in her thoughts.

And then it got worse. She began less and less daydreaming and more migraines; harsher migraines. He noticed she wasn't eating one day while in the Chow Hall. She sat at a table in the corner, staring down at her tray of food. She pushed it back and forth, back and forth, back and forth for a long while and then left. Never once taking a single bite. Then came the dizzy spells. Jonas had watched her get up from the extra desk in his office and collapse, hitting her head on the edge. She claimed she lost her footing, but he knew better.

He knew something was wrong. Ever since the Gou'ald Mothership she had been acting strangely. She wasn't quite there, but wasn't quite gone either. It was like an in-between. Like she was stuck in a doorway and unable to move forwards or backwards.

"I wish she would just talk to us…" Jonas breathed out under his breath and looked down at the table top. Teal'c and Sam caught it and looked over at him. His eyes met theirs, realizing he had said it aloud. They shared the same feelings. Not only had they lost Jack to the Tok'ra for the time being, but they had lost Rose.

"SG-1," General Hammond's voice caught them all by surprise and they quickly rose from their seats to greet him. He didn't look too pleased with what he needed to say, "After long consideration, Rose has decided to take a leave of absence. It is now jus the three of you for the time being."

"Did she say why?" Jonas was quick to ask.

"Personal reasons." General Hammond replied. He wished he could have given them more, but that was all he even knew. Rose had been adamant. She had been firm. General Hammond couldn't find it within himself to reject her request.

"So now what sir?" Sam asked and stared at him, awaiting orders.

* * *

Rose walked the hallway back to her room. She closed the door behind her and walked to her bed. She sat on the edge and closed her eyes as a migraine began. She rubbed her forehead, but it offered no comfort.

Something was stirring… breeding… festering inside of her and she knew it. She could feel it. She had requested leave because she had finally admitted to herself that she was at no capacity to perform the way her team, her friends, needed her to perform. General Hammond had earnestly tried to convince her that the best way to overcome 'whatever' she was going through was by losing herself in work. If it had only been her two broken ribs, then maybe she would have, but it wasn't.

Rose laid down on her bed and turned on her side. She hugged a pillow to her chest tightly and tried to free her mind of all thought. It wasn't that simple though. Memories flooded her every time she closed her eyes. She remembered the night she was trying to escape from the White City. She remembered the warning Uinseann had given her, the Phantom, the Falls… the cloaked figure standing overhead. She desperately tried to remember a face, but it was lost in the darkness that befell her as she was pulled further and further beneath the water.

Rose tossed and turned, trying to escape her thoughts and memories if only for a moment. She heard screams in her mind, saw flashes. Her memories jumped from one spot to another too fast for her to comprehend. Her head pounded, jolts of pain shooting through her skull. She heard her name, a whisper in her ear and saw a tunnel. Light danced in the shadows up ahead. She heard her name again and then it all faded away. The memories, the sounds, the pain were all gone and she could breathe again.

She opened her eyes and stared across the room. There sat a makeshift altar that Daniel had helped her build the last time she was here. She rose from the bed, head light and vision blurred. She kneeled before the altar and lit the white candles and burned the incense of sage. Her hands came to rest on top of her thighs, laced with palms facing up as though to present an offering. Her eyes were gently closed as she recited a chant under her breath.

A statue stared at her as she prayed. She gently called out for Gaenor, hoping for her to return from whence she had gone. She needed her. She needed her advice, her guidance and the comfort of her presence. She felt like a child again; lost, confused, in pain. Gaenor had come to her before, but where was she now? Where had she gone? Why had she gone?

"I invoke you, Caireen, my goddess to lead me in my hour of need." Rose opened her eyes and looked at the statue of Caireen. "Please… help me remember it all. Help me to understand; to put it all together. What happened…? What have I forgotten?"

Apart from what was happening within her, she felt more and more that she was losing the connection to her home and to her people. People who relied on her and looked up to her for guidance.

"Caireen," Rose began as her face contorted in a mixture of worry and loss, "please. If you can hear me, help me. If you exist, show me."

This was not her goddess. Rose had no religion of her own. It was Gaenor's religion that she had simply picked up. During prayer, it was always Gaenor reciting chants and praises to the mother goddess. Not Rose. It was Gaenor who decided what color candles to burn and what scent of incense. Not Rose.

Having been orphaned at a young age, dealt a tough childhood and a tough role in the political sphere of her people, Rose had come to believe that people were on their own in this world. There were no gods or goddesses, no higher power to answer to when your time came. Only the universe and an endless cycle. People lived and died and that was it. There were false gods and idols and masters. The guises the Gou'ald had worn had become transparent to her people long ago and with the knowledge they had been in the service of false gods, her people had resorted back to paganism; to their original deities.

There were so many of them and all were great in their own ways, but none belonged to Rose. Still, Rose kept Gaenor's customs for some reason. Perhaps to feel her presence once more and to keep her close.

Rose picked up the statue and studied it. Her fingers gently brushed over the statue's face that Gaenor had carved from Alder wood using Rose's fingers. Hours upon hours it had taken to perfect it. Each intricate detail had been the work of Gaenor, not Rose.

"Where are you?" Rose breathed out and her hand clenched the statue. She closed her eyes and shook her head, a tightening in her chest and a pain shooting through her head. She didn't see the tunnel this time. Instead, she saw an oak. It was the largest tree she had ever seen.

A bolt of pain surged through her head and she gripped the statue harder, gritting her teeth at the pain.

The oak sat alone on a small island in a pool of water. She could hear water falling in the distance and somehow she knew it was a waterfall. The seen flashed rapidly. The healthy tree, green and strong, flashed back and forth between its resolute visage and one of death; a decaying oak in a dark scene with fog rolling in.

Rose felt cold. It started in her finger tips and crept up her arms. She heard her name being called again only this time it was different. It was a sing-song tune that she had only ever heard Gaenor use, but it wasn't the warrior's voice. This voice was unfamiliar.

Rose's head pounded and she dropped the statue, pressing her hands tightly to the sides of her head.

" _ **Roooooosaliiiiiiiiinaaaaaaa…"**_

The voice called again as another pain shot through her head. Rose stood up and stumbled clumsily a few feet. Her hands pressed firmly to her head, hoping to cease the torture. She stumbled, knocked herself into the table that sat in the middle of the room and fell to her knees. She stared at the door; her goal. She seized up, body paralyzed and collapsed onto the cold, hard cement floor. She shook involuntarily in little spurts like twitches. She couldn't move, couldn't think straight. The room faded away and she was transported somewhere else. Stormy sky above, fog rolling in, the oak tree weathering at the center of the scene.

"Rosalina?" Footsteps followed the voice from a distance away. Rose spotted her, Gaenor, walking to the center of this mess. She tried to speak out, call to her, but she couldn't. She jerked this way and that. Unable to control herself.

"Rose!" Gaenor raced around the other side of the tree and stared out into the darkness. She searched, shook her head and turned around as she tried to spot anything. She halted and stared right at Rose.

Rose had somehow moved to the oak and was curled into a tight ball beneath the oak with fog hovering around her. She also wasn't twitching. She sat calmly cloaked and hooded in white and blue.

Gaenor approached hesitantly. Rose tried to speak, but nothing came out. Her lips didn't even move. She tied to move her body, but it too was limp.

What was this? What was happening to her? Where was she?

Gaenor knelt down beside her and looked her over. Her hand trembled as she outstretched it towards Rose, placing it on her arm. Gaenor tightened her hold and turned Rose over. The fog covered her face. So Gaenor lifted her head, hood falling back to reveal golden hair and a pale complexion. Tears sprang to her eyes as she stared down upon Rose. She gathered her into her arms, cradling her head to her chest.

"I found you." She cried and rocked back and forth. She closed her eyes and hid her face in Rose's hair. "I've got you. You're safe now."

"…am I?" The voice startled Gaenor. It startled Rose as well. It was not her voice. Her voice was mingled within it, a deeper, more sinister voice throwing it off. Gaenor opened her eyes and stared down at the ground, not releasing Rose. Slowly she pulled back to see Rose's eyes open wide. They were the deep blue that she remembered, but something was very different. Rose's eyes glowed a whitish hue and Gaenor dropped her like she had been burned.

"No… it can't be." Gaenor breathed out and shook her head. Rose stood up straight and raised her chin. A smirk slithered onto her face.

What was going on? Why couldn't she move the way **she** wanted? Speak what **she** wanted to speak? Who was controlling her?

"Yes." Rose's voice was not her own. It was a mixture of different voices; high and low pitched at the same time; soft and deep.

She didn't understand what was happening. She had no control. She couldn't do anything and worse, she didn't know who was in there with her.

"You're too late. I told her mother I would have her one day and now I do." The imposter spoke again.

"No! Let her go!" Gaenor screamed.

It was like a dream. Rose looked at Gaenor through her own eyes, her voice pass through her own lips, her body move, but it was like a dream.

Gaenor charged at Rose without restraint. She swung her left fist, but Rose dodged with grace and pushed the hand away. Gaenor fell to the ground on her knees with her back to Rose.

"You couldn't save your own daughter. What makes you think you can save someone else's?" Rose spat and shook her head at Gaenor, who stared at the ground beneath her. Rose could see that the words cut straight through her.

Gaenor threw another punch at Rose, who blocked. A fist met a block. A kick was dodged. Too evenly matched. The two were like bolts of lightning; fists and legs flying. Gaenor fell to the ground from one of Rose's blocks. She swung around with her leg out and hit Rose, sending her backwards with her head hitting the ground hard. Gaenor ran and jumped, fist pulled back and prepared to strike. Rose rolled just as Gaenor hit, fist colliding with the ground.

The imposter crouched like a wild cat on the ground several feet away. Her eyes narrowed and her jaw tightened as rage soared through her. She breathed hard, worn from the action. Again they waited and watched each other.

Rose was a prisoner in her own body, watching someone else use her to attack someone she cared for more than anything.

Gaenor knelt on the ground where she had landed. Her heart was racing. Slowly she turned her head to look at Rose. Her ice blue eyes grew hard as her teeth gritted together. The two stayed this way for what felt like a lifetime. Each waited for the other to make the first move. Thunder cracked overhead. A bolt of lightning streaking across the dark sky.

"She's mine." The imposter growled deep in Rose's throat.

"Over my dead body." Gaenor seethed.

The two launched themselves, running at full speed. Each pulled back a fist as they hurled towards each other. They both released their strike.

Rose missed; Gaenor didn't.

Gaenor's fist met Rose's chest dead center.

* * *

Rose shot up. Her strangled gasp scared her as she stared up at a blank grey ceiling. She lay on the floor of her room, right where she had passed out. Her head no longer hurt and she was free from her paralyzed condition. Her head twisted left and right, trying to put everything back together. Everything was jumbled. Nothing made sense.

Rose pulled herself up, gripping the edge of the table tightly. Her vision was blurry and her head spun. She felt an ache resonating in her chest and placed a hand to it, wincing once she touched it. She stood up straighter and pulled down the hem of her shirt. A baseball sized contusion sat dead center of her chest. She gently touched it this time and tried to wrap her head around it.

Was it real? What was that place? Who had been in her body? ….where was Gaenor?

Rose looked around her room. She hadn't expected to see Gaenor sitting somewhere smiling at her, but had half hoped she would.

"What the Hell is happening to me?" She asked suddenly as frightened tears rushed to her eyes. She fell back into a chair and placed an unsteady hand over her mouth. She was going mad. She was losing touch with reality. "What's happening…?"


	20. I'm Ready

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose had sat at the table for a long time. She had sobbed and sobbed, unable to control herself, unable to pull herself together. She had paced the floor. She had prayed at the altar. Then she had climbed in to bed and cried some more.

It had been over a week now. She hardly slept. She had hardly eaten. She actively avoided Sam, Teal'c, Jonas, and Jack. Teal'c had come by with food here and there, never knocking on the door. Sam had come, stopped at the door, knocked so gently you could hardly hear it and then had left in the same fashion. Then Jack had found her the other day when he had returned from his mission with the Tok'ra. He wasn't happy and she refused to open the door. He had said his piece and stormed off. Jonas… Jonas had given her space. A lot of space. He had never come, never knocked, never checked.

" _When you're ready…"_

His words had recited over and over in her head again and again. She had held onto them for some reason; tightly. It was comforting in a way. It was the only thing she had control of at the moment.

She now sat with her head in the palms of her hands, breathing heavily and slowly. She leaned back in her seat and licked her dry lips. She needed answers, but there was no one here to give them. Something drew her attention to her closet. A force pulled her towards it. She opened the door and pulled out her Condor-II in khaki. The pack Jack had given to her; the same one that had come through the Stargate with her that day the gate closed on Luxima.

She stared at it in her hands. She felt strange. She was calm, but she was unsettled by just how calm. She knew something was wrong with her; deeply, horribly wrong. Yet, she wasn't worried for some reason. It was as though her mind was playing tricks on herself that weren't actually tricks.

She brought the pack to the round table in her room and opened it up. She pulled out her notes that she had taken on her research, among other things. She ran her fingers over one with a leather cover. She debated on whether or not to open it. She tapped her nails on it and stared down at it for a long moment. She finally picked it up and ran her thumbs over it, feeling its smoothness. She then set it off to the side and picked up a different notebook instead.

Daniel had given her several of the earthly cardboard notebooks years ago when she had become so fond of the ones in his office. Rose picked up a blue one and opened it, reading over her notes. She read and read and read, but she had no idea what she was looking for. It was like an idea was poised at the back of her mind, like trying to read a word in pitch darkness. It was there. Whatever it was she needed was there.

Rose peered down at all the open notebooks. She had gone through nearly all of them. Something wasn't clicking into place. Somehow everything was connected and the missing piece of the puzzle was eluding her despite it being right in front of her. She needed help, but there was no one to help her. Avia was stuck on Luxima. Daniel was dead. Gaenor was who knew where.

"Please, if someone is there and you can hear me, for the love of whatever high power there may be, help me." Rose pleaded and looked up at the ceiling. There was nothing but silence in response. "I need help. I'm scared and I'm all alone here. Daniel's gone and Gaenor's is gone. I can't get home to Avia and I don't know what's happening on Luxima and I feel like I'm going insane."

Something flew to the floor and landed with a loud thud, making Rose jump out of her seat. Rose looked around and spotted her leather bound journal sitting on the floor by the door to her room. She stared at it a moment then walked to it hesitantly. She stared at it a moment and then bent over to pick it up. She turned it over in her hands and then looked around the room.

She was alone as far as she could tell. She didn't trust herself though. She wasn't in the right state to be sure of anything she thought or felt. She looked down at the journal again and ran a hand over its cover.

"I remember you."

* * *

Jonas sat in his office, as he did every spare moment he had, combing over the notebooks Dr. Jackson had written in. They were detailed, extremely detailed and extremely valuable for the information he had logged away in them. The only information that was missing from them was anything personal about Rose. Of course there was a notebook on Luxima, but there was only brief mention of her and only when she had explained something to him. It seemed as though things were purposely missing, neglected to be written down with purpose. It made Rose more curious to Jonas and it also worried him.

He had hoped that maybe learning something about her would make him understand better. Understand what he didn't even know he didn't understand. He was confused by how Rose was acting.

He flipped through the notebook and then came back to the first page. He had read the notebook inside out, backwards and over. He knew **everything** inside of it; word for word. Yet, he felt there was something still within it that he was missing. His eyes scanned the first page:

 _Luxima is a relatively small planet located in a part of the universe SG-1 has named the Aurora  
Galaxy, on account of there being three suns of different colors and in different life stages. The  
White City's boundaries are roughly the size of the state of Texas and the country, Lux, is the  
size of Canada. There are many parts left undiscovered, especially to the far North. Rosalina,  
the girl we brought back from Abydos, said that the Elders told stories of beasts of different  
kinds dwelling in caves amongst the snowcapped mountains. Her favorite story was that of a  
beast with large claws and larger teeth, black and white stripes with a growl that could cause  
an avalanche._

Jonas leaned back in his seat, tossing his feet up on his desk and crossing his legs at the ankles. He let the notebook rest on his pelvis and sighed. He continued to read, flipping through the pages in what seemed like a desperate search for something that just wasn't there.

 _Rose brought us to see the Elders today. She explained that there are seven Elders at any given  
time on the Council and that each holds a different title and with it a different job; Judge, Keeper,  
Seeker, Arms, Healer, Cleric, and High Elder. When I asked about how Elders were chosen Rose  
seemed upset. She explained that the Elders were usually chosen through lineage alone. Only  
later did I discover that this girl was in line to becoming one of them and, for lack of a better or  
stronger term, despised it wholeheartedly. Why? Well, she wouldn't quite say. I think it has  
something to do with her parents. From gathering information from the Keeper, I believe that  
both of Rose's parents were Elders. Once chosen, there was no way out. That's why Rose went  
through the Stargate. Twenty years old and already being forced into such a responsibility is…  
_ _ **difficult**_ _to say the least. Especially since she had such a difficult childhood._

Jonas took a deep breath and leaned back in his seat, hand over his mouth. What was so difficult about her childhood? Who were her parents? Were they both actually Elders? Why did Rose despise the Elders so much? There were so many questions left unanswered. If only he could find that damned report…

* * *

"I don't understand." Rose looked back about her room, half expecting another interaction from whatever or whomever had tossed the journal. "Gaenor?"

Nothing. Rose looked back down at the journal and ran a hand over the cover. She looked off to the side and then hugged the journal to her chest. A tingle ran over her from her right shoulder to her left, crossing through her chest.

"…I know you." She breathed out, recognizing the feeling. She looked around the room slowly and spotted a picture that sat on her nightstand missing, the picture of her and Daniel. She found the picture sitting on her altar beside the statue Gaenor had carved. Rose narrowed her eyes.

It seemed too much and too simple.

"You two are… together?" She had to hear the words, but even then it seemed too coincidental. Rose closed her eyes and tried to make sense of it all. There was too much to put together. She couldn't concentrate. She needed to focus on one thing at a time. She was over loading.

 _"Whenever you're ready… I'm here."_

The voice came from nowhere. She knew who had said it, but why had it resurfaced then?

"He reminds me a lot of you, Daniel." Rose looked at the picture on her altar and tapped her fingers on the journal. She knew not what was inside of it. Every word on every page, every paper and document and thought belonged to someone else. Someone very close to her.

Rose looked at the altar again. She trusted Daniel. If this was him saying he was either with Gaenor or knew where she was; fine. She believed him. If he wanted her to go find his replacement and show him her work; fine. She would. It was the only guidance she had at the moment and so long as her symptoms of whatever was happening to her were becoming milder and milder by the day, she might as well take advantage and figure everything out while she could.

* * *

Jonas flipped the pages in the notebook again. He wanted to bang his head against the desk. This was awful. He wanted to just ask her what it was he had been searching for in these notebooks, what the hidden message was that Daniel was covering up. But he couldn't. He knew she needed her space and her time. He had to be patient and she had to come to him. He just hoped she would.

Jonas set the notebook on the desk and wheeled closer. He set and elbow on it and placed his hand against his forehead, rereading once more.

 _Rose, as she explicitly explained that she liked to be called, took us around the White City today.  
_ _Apparently, the White City was one of seven major cities on Luxima. Centuries ago, a Gou'ald  
controlled Luxima, which was originally named Noxima. Noxima, I believe, is derived from the  
Latin term 'nox' for night. A never-ending night, as Rose so eagerly corrected me. When the  
people were able to overcome the Gou'ald, they renamed the planet Luxima, meaning light of  
day, from 'lux,' which meant light in Latin. It was to signify the peoples' new beginning._

 _As Rose aided me in searching through the Records of the Keepers, I discovered something  
strange. There was a mix of cultures that resembled European nations on Earth. Irish deities  
dominated the religions of those in the branches of the Imperial Army and the lower classes  
while Roman and Greek deities seemed to belong to the Upper classes. It seemed like a split  
between two pagan cultures that defined two separate social statuses._

 _No one seemed to know anything about 'Roman,' 'Greek,' or 'Irish' anything when I asked.  
I figured they probably wouldn't, but there is always the off chance that one of these days –_

"I'm ready."

Jonas jumped at the voice, nearly falling back in his seat. He looked to the doorway of his office and saw Rose standing there. For a long moment he couldn't speak. It had only been a week since he had seen or spoken to her, but he was frozen like a deer in headlights. Her hair was free from any obstruction or restraint and framed her face in soft waves, making her blue eyes stand out. She wore simple clothes, a white flowy shirt with black leggings that Sam had given her and sandals.

Jonas leapt up from his desk and stood as straight as he could. He fumbled a moment with what to do with his hands, moving his arms from a crossed position to just shoving his hand into his pockets.

"Hey, I uh…" Jonas seemed slightly surprised to see her there, "I wanted to come check on you, but I – uh – just didn't know and… yeah."

He hadn't expected her to open up to him for a bit longer. He gave a small dejected laugh and ran a hand over his mouth, looking from the floor to her.

"Can you tell you startled me?" He asked rhetorically and laughed again. Rose smiled, actually smiled and Jonas felt his chest tighten. He had missed her smiles, but he could see something in her eyes. Something was right.

"What was it you said?" He asked and rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. Rose drummed her fingers on the journal she hugged to her chest. She then took a few steps closer and held it out to him. He looked at it and then looked back at her. "What is it?"

"What you've been searching for." She replied simply, never letting her arms fall and continuously holding out the journal to him in offering. Jonas' expression changed. It was too much of a coincidence. How did she know he was searching? And how did she know what he was searching for when he didn't even know?

"This is everything that is missing from Daniel's notes." Rose explained and looked down at the journal briefly. Jonas hesitantly reached out for the journal and took hold of it. He was about to ask her something, but she cut him off.

"No, don't ask. Just," she shook her head and closed her eyes, "just read it. Besides Daniel, you will be the only other person to know everything that has happened. At least what I know anyway."

"Are you sure?" Jonas hoped she wasn't feeling pressured. That wasn't his intentions. He wanted to be there for her like she had for him the last several months. He wanted her to open up to him on her terms, when she felt ready.

"I trust you, Jonas." Her words struck him. They weren't as simple as they appeared. "You. **Just you**."

She released her hold on the journal and crossed her arms over her chest. Jonas watched her for only a moment and then looked down at the journal. It carried a weight much greater than an ordinary journal should. When she said it had everything in it, Jonas knew she meant _everything_ ; her life, her secrets, her desires, her research, everything.

Jonas moved to his desk and sat down, turning his head to look at Rose, who stood in her place uncomfortably.

"If you would be more comfortable, you don't have to stay." Jonas felt odd saying that. It was the journal, her life, her deepest, darkest secrets that he had in his hands. He didn't feel right being left alone with them, but she seemed so… uncomfortable. So unsure.

"No." Rose shook her head slowly and rolled over the other chair from the other desk where the stereo sat. She wanted to tell him that there was more going on than what the journal held. That things had begun to happen to her lately, that she rather not go back to her room and be alone. She sat down beside him and looked down at the journal. Jonas placed a hand on her knee and gave it a gentle, reassuring squeeze.

"You don't have to share this with me." He gave her another chance to rescind.

"I want to. I'm just…" Rose had been so confident when she was walking to his office and now she shook like a leaf. "There are dark things in my past that even I can't completely remember and they're all locked away inside there. It's like one big puzzle Jonas and I can't figure it out."

"You haven't read it?" Jonas asked instantly, taken aback. Rose shook her head and looked down at the journal.

"It wasn't mine." She spoke up and met his gaze. He could see it then; fear. The same fear he saw when she clung to him onboard the mothership. He looked back at the journal and dragged it closer. He unlatched the lock and looked over at her with an encouraging smile.

"We'll remember together."

Jonas opened the journal and found a small yellow sealed envelope. He picked it up and looked over at Rose, holding it out to her. She shook her head vehemently. Jonas looked down at it again and noticed her name scrawled on the front.

"It looks like Daniel's handwriting." He announced and looked to her. This was Daniel's journal. "It's addressed to you. I think you should read it first."

He laid it on her lap and sat back, pulling his hand from her knee. She hesitantly picked up the envelope and opened it, pulling out the folded paper.

 _Rosie,_

 _You asked me to dig a little around the records and the library, so I did. I also went back and rewrote  
the report about Luxima and all my notes on it. Just in case someone went snooping. Didn't know who,  
but I didn't want them to find anything because of me. So, here is everything I have. I was even able  
to get something from the Keeper that I think you might find interesting._

 _I don't know exactly what it is you're looking for, but I hope this all helps. Just be careful, okay? I've  
been a little worried about you. Haven't heard from you in a while. Kind of not like you to go this long.  
Don't be a stranger. Come see us. __**Soon**_ _. We all miss you and remember that you're not alone._

 _Lots of love,_

 _Daniel_

Rose folded the paper back up and put it back into the envelope, setting it on the desk beside the journal. Jonas watched her, but didn't ask. Rose met his gaze after a moment and then pulled herself closer to the desk, sitting directly beside Jonas. She looked down at the journal, debating whether or not to turn the page and begin.

"You're not alone, Rose." Jonas saw her tense at his words. She looked to him and searched his face, his eyes. He was so genuine. Turning back to the journal she felt like a small weight was lifted from her shoulders. She had asked for help and here it was; someone she felt she could trust completely with the ugliness of herself and her past.

"Here we go…" She touched the page again and then turned it slowly, revealing Daniel's handwriting scrawled top to bottom of the pages. Her eyes found the first line. Jonas found her right hand and grasped it, giving it a gentle, reassuring squeeze as he too began to read.


	21. You're Not Alone

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

 _Everything you know about the Elders, about the Gou'ald coming to Luxima, about what they were there for; it was all a lie._

 _Follow the thread._ _I know you've had a lot of questions over the years, Rosie. More than you have let on or told Jack and I. The biggest being these I think:_

 _What happened to your parents?_

 _Was Roderick really your father?_

 _What happened in your childhood?_

 _Why can't you remember anything before age 11?_

 _Why there seems to be a bigger stigma around you than just being too "inexperienced" to be an Elder?_

 _I can't answer everything because there was just too little information and so many people didn't have answers. However, I think that everything leads back to the Elders from the last Council in some way or another. They've done a good job at keeping secrets and covering their tracks through the years. It's not hard to see there's been a dark cloud hanging over the Elders for a long, long time. Stretching back to when the Gou'ald visited Luxima. Somehow the Gou'ald, the Elders and you are connected and I think I've figured out what it is._

 _They're all covering something up, Rose. Something that happened to you back when you were a child. You say that you can't remember. I think that was on purpose. I believe the Elders erased those memories to protect you and cover up whatever they were doing or letting the Gou'ald do._

 _At least two of them were looking out for you anyways and I say two_ _because I think that_ _ **both**_ _of you parents were Elders, Rosie. I know, I know… That's not allowed and it's a taboo, but there are too many coincidences that point to it. The Keeper,_ _Eamon,_ _even agrees with me. He said he suspected something of the sort for a long time, but never said anything to the others because they would have taken it out on you. He didn't find that was very fair, but I assume that there are those on the Council who feel otherwise._

 _I know you think you can't trust anyone on Luxima, but I don't think that's true. There are some, working in the back ground, who do have your best interests at heart and are on your side. Avia, Eamon, even Uinseann, though I know you don't trust him._

 _Anyways, the biggest question of your father. I think I've figured out who he is thanks to Eamon. During the last twenty years there have been nine men serving on the Council; two High Elders, one Keeper, two Seekers, one Judge, and three Arms. It very well could be any of them, but I narrowed it down to those who were serving at the same time as your mother. Which leaves_ _Eamon, Miach, Torrin, and Uinseann._

 _I told you I have a feeling I know which it is, but I think you do too. I think you've known it for quite some time, but just wouldn't allow yourself to believe it. I'm not sure you would fully believe me either if I just told you outright. I want you to finish reading all of this because it's going to become clear. Everything is going to become clear. Just know, for now at least, you're father never left you or your mother behind. He never died in battle or fled in the middle of the night._

 _I think a good place to start is with a little history. Your planet is very old, as you already knew, but while it resembles other planets there's something quite different. The climates in different sections are off, deserts where there should be arctic tundra for one, and no matter where you go you have an overwhelming sense you are being watched._

 _Your people have stories for all of this. Those like Gaenor, the phantoms you see in the forest at night, creatures in the north and south with large claws. Stories come from somewhere. You see them for what they are. I've learned that most of your people, however, do not. They think they're all just that; stories. They have never seen an Alma. They have never seen a phantom or one of the large creatures to the north with black and white stripes._

 _Somehow you have though. Somehow you are able to interact with it all on another plane. Kind of like of Oma except you're still living. You can sense when something isn't right in the world. I've seen it. Your long dazes into space, maybe you've never really noticed or just simply shrugged it off, but you feel something; you know something even if it isn't clear to you. That's why Gaenor found you in The Forest._

 _There are things much older on that planet than you and your people or even the Gou'ald. I think your parents knew that too. I think your connection to whatever this is, magic or life-force or whatever, is why the Elders erased your memories. But there's something else too. It has been bothering me for a long time. Ever since Jack and I stepped foot on the planet._

 _There is no trace of Gou'ald interaction in any piece of literature, any document, and no one can seem to recall the last day specifically when the Gou'ald left for good. They all remember Lucretia, the famed woman who led your people out of slavery from the Gou'ald, but they can't remember the name of the Gou'ald she fought._

 _Another thing is, what were the Gou'ald doing on your planet to begin with? This ties in with how there is something about your planet that just isn't right and I say "isn't right" because I don't know how else to describe it. I believe it's magic of some form, but not like in the movies you've seen here on Earth. I mean real magic that the planet provides and only a select few have the ability to wield. I tore the library and the Records apart searching for some kind of hard proof. I found it. Mysticus. It's what your people used to describe as magic, Rose. More often than not it was used long ago to define those who had abilities to communicate with spirits, interact with the dead, and feel things that were unnatural, even use unnatural means to combat them. They had power, real power, and sometimes it ended badly. Very badly._

 _I think the Elders were afraid of you and what you might be. They had seen a Necromancer before in Lucretia. Some of the records described her as a force to be reckoned with and able to raise the dead on a whim, using them as puppets. That's how she won the war with the Gou'ald. However, what happened after is a bit more sinister. She was "claimed" by the darkness and it became "necessary to put an end to her wrong doings." The document was all but destroyed in the basement of the Records. The Elders, once the Council was created, deemed Lucretia was "too powerful" and "unpredictable" and so they felt the need to stop her. It took the whole Council to stop her before she destroyed the White City. She was hell bent on seeing it burn to the ground. She claimed that it was built on top of a henge of sorts that her people, your people, had drawn their powers from._

 _Lucretia maybe your ancestor according to the records, but your abilities are quite different though. You can't control the dead, but you can speak to them. According to Eamon, that was how Lucretia had begun as a child. It's the first step to being seduced by the darkness. I think this "Mysticus" is why the Gou'ald first appeared on your planet. They probably observed someone centuries ago using magic and saw that it was a raw power that never depleted or waned. They probably wanted to harness the power so they could somehow find a way to use it. When they figured out they couldn't just collect magic like they had Naquadria and_ _Naquadah they decided to_ _use the people who could wield it instead._

 _Looking deeper through everything there is this overwhelming sense of light and dark on Luxima. In some of the literary works I stumbled upon, some people alleged that there had been Mysticus wielders who served on both sides; Luxima and the Gou'ald, but that they had died out long ago. I don't think that's true. I think they may have gone into hiding. Perhaps they thought that if they "disappeared" then the Gou'ald wouldn't have a reason to return._

 _Not all who used Mysticus were "dark." Actually, there were more who had practiced Animancy, usually referred to these people as Conjurer, more so than the Black Arts. A phrase continued to pop up stating, "Everything has a price." I think they were talking about the Conjurer who turned dark. Using their powers for so long for such a horrible war took its toll on them, on Lucretia. This Animancy was the_ _"light" side of Mysticus. It roughly means "the breath of life." It was to give life to something or give a soul, but not in the same way as bringing the dead back to life. So hence the nickname Conjurer. It was more like force wielding;_ _psychokinesis_ _, pyrokinesis, hydrokinesis, geokenisis, etc. It's actually quite interesting, but I'm sure you just want the facts so you can answer your questions._

 _Between you and Lucretia there was a long line of women in your family, leading all the way down to you and your mother. There has always been someone in your line sitting on the Council. Always. I don't know if the other Elders made sure there was a Levana holding a seat or if it was your family's "duty" and they made sure or even if anyone realized this was happening, but there's always been someone._

 _Now seeing as Lucretia had wielded magic it would make sense that her abilities flowed down through the line. The fact that you are able to communicate with Gaenor, even the fact that you could see her spirit when you first met her, means you have some of that power. However, trying to find a written accord of your mother having power was near impossible. It's almost like she didn't exist altogether. Other than the "Letter of Declaration for the Seizure of Celyna Valara Levana" there isn't much else to prove she existed passed your eleventh birthday. No grave, no paper trail, no one seems to know where she went. She hadn't been seized by the Imperial Soldiers. By that time she was already in the wind._

 _Your mother had grown up outside the White City. I think Avia already told you that though. She was from a small village to the north nestled near the Araceli Mountains. I wasn't able to go there myself without Jack figuring out what I was doing, but Eamon told me that the village was gone. It had been destroyed during the Great War for Freedom._

 _When I asked him how he knew this, he said it had been his home as well. Your mother and he had grown up in the same village, but had come to the city at different times. He also said that there was a third who had come from there, but he refused to say who. I believe this to be your father. Well, anyways, your mother came to the city when she was about eighteen. She became a Bellona and then by sheer force she fought her way into taking her place on the Council. She became the Healer, but you know all this. Now I know it's a bit of a stretch, but I think your mother used her powers as a Healer._ _There were some recordings of times she had saved people on the verge of death with just a gentle caress of her hand._

 _According to most, your mother had come into the Council being very much like you. Happy-go-lucky, eager and then one day she became very reserved; no friends, no family, kept to herself. That kind of behavior always breeds rumors and at the time people wondered if there was something wrong with your mother. Mentally. They hadn't suspected anything more yet. It wasn't until she became pregnant that they questioned things. They had never seen her with any man. She was very content with being alone and to all of a sudden appear one day pregnant was odd to say the least. The Elders questioned her on who the father was, but for the longest time she refused to give up a name. She finally did when they threatened to remove her from Council, imprison her and place the baby for adoption once it was born._

 _After that people began to spot her with Roderick Miren, an Imperial Soldier, and they just assumed that he was no doubt the unnamed father of her child. However, I think differently. I believe Roderick was just a scapegoat, whether he knew it or not, perhaps under a charm or something, was a different story. Despite my attempts, Eamon just wouldn't give me a name for the third person to have come from your mother's village. That's your father and because no one would name him that means he was somebody important. The only ones that important are the Elders because of it being such a taboo. I think it's safe to rule Eamon out, just so we're clear._

 _Your mother and Roderick never married. It was strange, but not uncommon for your people to do that. A few years after you were born he died in battle and your mother went back to being a recluse with you at her side. More and more though she began to "wither" as Eamon called it. She grew too quiet, stared at nothing for hours, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. He often found your mother standing in the garden with you in her arms, just staring out at the sky with a blank stare. On some occasions he would spot Uinseann questioning your mother on her behavior and how she was handling you. He seemed very concerned for your well-being._

 _Eamon made it clear that your mother never hurt you or neglected you, but that people questioned her ability to mother you in her state. They chalked it up at first to grief of Roderick and then when you came of age for schooling they began to see other changes. Your mother became less quiet. She became defiant and unruly. She argued with the Council constantly and held a grudge against your teacher, Sabine, over reforms. What reforms is a mystery though. It was listed in the records as reforms to protect orphaned children in the city, but there was so little in the way of movement with those reforms that I think they fought over something else. Something the Elders, or maybe just Sabine and your mother, didn't want the public knowing._

 _I talked with some of the other Elders and they told me that your mother would disappear for days at a time. Randomly too. Sometimes in the middle of a meeting she would just stand and leave without so much as excusing herself, that she would come to one of their doors and leave you in one of their care. It soon arose that someone was accusing your mother of leaving the White City to practice the Black Arts like your ancestor had. They claimed to have spotted her by a waterfall chanting and making the water boil. Her accuser was Sabine, of course. I believe it might have been out of spite. I think your mother was meddling in her work, whatever it was, and she wanted it to stop. Best way would be to get your mother out of the picture._

 _Uinseann said that at your mother's hearing she never once denied the allegations, but instead explained that she had been looking into a series of disappearing children from the surrounding villages. She accused Sabine of using the children in some kind of science experiment. She had found out that children had been taken from the villages under Sabine's orders and vanished. They never came back and no one ever saw them again. Sabine again accused your mother of Necromancy and the Black Arts in retaliation. Your mother, overcome with anger, apparently shattered the Conclave windows without so much as raising a hand and her eyes seemed to glow. That only helped in Sabine's case because your mother was labeled as a Necromancer like Lucretia. She was imprisoned and you fell under the care of Uinseann for a short while._

 _After about a year, you disappeared mysteriously under Sabine's watch one day. You had gone to class with other children and you were all gone before night fell. When Uinseann told your mother she, as he described, "broke her chains in a surge of embers that she emitted from her hands." At that point, it was clear she was a Conjurer if nothing more. She went off after Sabine and then never came back, but you did. Uinseann and you came back, but neither of you could say where your mother had gone._

 _Soon after that you were sent to live in an orphanage. Then Avia found you and you went to live with her. After your mother's disappearance and Sabine's death a cloud hovered over the Elders and Council. The people began to distrust the government they had chosen to represent them. There were too many secrets and strange things were happening, children had gone missing, now not one but two Elders were missing. They have had a hard time overcoming everything._

 _No one has heard from your mother since or seen her. She just vanished that day. I don't think the Elders have bothered to search for her either. What happened between you, Sabine and your mother is a mystery. The only person who would know besides you is Uinseann. He was there at every point and even afterwards. I believe searching for your mother would fall under Uinseann's authority, wouldn't it? If he declared a country wide search, the people would have to or vice-versa. So why hadn't he ordered one? Was he trying to help her because she had been right? Or was there more?_

 _That made me curious. He has been this shadowed figure in your life for a long while. So, I dug. I found out that he was the one who told Avia where you were and asked her to adopt you. He signed the paperwork affirming it. He was the one who got you into the Academy when you decided you wanted to be a Bellona like your mother. He was even the final, decisive vote that got you onto the Council at such a young age._ _Uinseann has always been there with you and your mom… He was the third person from that same small village to the north. They both sat on Council at the same time. He has always seemed very interested in your life and has always seemed to make it a point of showing up when you were either getting into trouble or when you were being praised. I don't have any other proof that he is your father, but Rosie, if I feel that this is him, then you must._

 _I'm sorry that I don't have more to give you. The Elders have kept everything very hush-hush and most of the documentation has been destroyed over the years. I don't know who wiped your memory. Perhaps your mother or another Elder? Maybe even whatever had happened that day? I don't know what exactly happened between your mother and Sabine or what Sabine was doing. It couldn't have been good though. I also don't know for sure what role the Gou'ald had to play in it all either. I do think they had come to your planet in search of harnessing the magic there, but that's all I can attest to._

 _There's a stigma around you being an Elder because of your mother's tarnished reputation of dabbling in Black Arts and whatever went on with Sabine. She took you somewhere and something must have happened. I just don't know what. I do know that the Stargate was moved from its original place to the White City in the West Wing after it all. I would assume then that Sabine was using the Stargate somehow. Maybe she was taking the children to another planet or someone was visiting Luxima. Maybe it was a Gou'ald, maybe it wasn't._

 _I wish I could have helped more. All the documents I could find are here in the journal. You need to talk to Uinseann. He must have some answers and I think you need to hear from him what you already know. I also think you should take a visit to the Araceli Mountains and see the village where your parents came from. Maybe there is something left behind that might help. Who knows? I would also track down the original place of the Stargate and find out why it was moved._

 _Jack and I are here to help if you need it, Rosie. Don't be afraid to ask. Teal'c and Sam would jump at the chance to help too. You have friends here who care about you. You're not alone. So don't think you are._

– _Daniel_


	22. What's happening to me?

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

"It was all a lie…" Out of everything that she had read in Daniel's letter **that** was what stuck in her mind the most. Her face went blank as her eyes widened in a daydream like stare. "Everything, my whole life, was a lie. It was all a concoction created by those who were supposed to protect me and guide me."

She shook her head, mind downward spiraling so fast that she didn't know if she would be able to catch up. She blinked rapidly, eyes darting all around. Jonas became worried. He had never seen her this distraught.

"Rose?" Jonas asked and watched her as she slowly broke down before his eyes. He made to reach out a hand to her, but she was quick to avoid it without realizing, swiveling around in her seat. Her back was rigid, shoulders straight and heavy like a statue.

"I-I don't understand. Why would they…? The Elders they..." Rose slapped a hand to her forehead as a sharp pain arose. She scrunched her eyes shut and grit her teeth, breathing becoming unsteady. "I don't understand. It's too much. It's all too much."

 _I think that_ _ **both**_ _of your parents were Elders…_

 _No one has heard from your mother since or seen her… She just vanished that day…_

 _I think the Elders were afraid of you and what you might be; a Mysticus…_

Rose rubbed both her hands over her face and pressed her fingers to her temples. Her head was pounding and pulsating with everything spinning around in her mind. Daniel's words circled like a whirlwind, bouncing back and forth. She could start to hear her heartbeat in her ears; bad-dum, bad-dum, bad-dum.

 _Y_ _our father never left you or your mother behind…_

 _He never died in battle or fled in the middle of the night…_

 _I think you've known it for quite some time…_

"Uinseann." Rose breathed out. Her hands had wound themselves into her hair, gripping it tightly. Her eyes stared wide and blankly down at the cement floor.

"What?" Jonas' expression changed with the name. He was confused at first and then something clicked into place. Rose released a heavy breath and relaxed, releasing her hair from her grip. She let her hands fall and she slumped in her seat. Rose turned in her seat and stared at Jonas. She swallowed hard, but did not speak.

"I know now who my father is, but cannot speak with him to learn the truth about everything else because some phantom has locked me out of Luxima." Rose exhaled in a single, strained breath. Her face through her words had showed an array of emotions from irony all the way to despair. Her eyes welled up with tears and she bit her bottom lip tightly, surprising Jonas that she hadn't drawn blood.

"Jonas," her voice shook," what am I going to do?"

Jonas' lips parted slightly, preparing to speak whatever answer he could give her, but there was nothing. She looked to him to make thing right just as Daniel would have done. He wasn't Daniel though. He had no answer. No reply. No comfort he could provide her. She needed her friend or her father and she could not get to either of them. Instead she was stuck on a planet not her own with strange people all around her day in and day out who she felt she could not speak openly with. She could travel anywhere through the Stargate except the one place she desperately desired to go: home.

Rose realized that she had asked him an impossible question. No one could answer her; not Jonas, not Jack, not even Daniel would have been able to. It was a question with a million and one answers and none at the same time. She suddenly stood up from her seat, chair spinning in circles by the force and headed for the door.

"Rose wait!" Jonas called out and moved just as quickly after her. He jogged down the hallway, trying his best to keep up with her fast-paced walk. They got to the elevators and she raced inside the empty compartment, but he caught the doors and squeezed passed them as they closed. Rose stood in the corner, eyes wide open and face sullen, staring at him.

He stared back at her, breathing heavily to catch his breath. He ran a hand over his mouth and licked his lips nervously. He had no idea what he was going to say. To give him more time he turned to the button panel and hit the emergency stop. The elevator jolted and the emergency lights went on, warning bells echoing in the small box. He turned back to face her.

"Rose, you don't have to do this." He started, already no liking his choice of words.

"Do what? All I did was leave." She replied, shaking her head slowly at him.

"You ran away." Jonas clarified and took a step closer to her. He placed his hands on her shoulders and stared down at her, bending slightly to meet her at eye level. "You can trust me, remember?"

"Jonas, you can't help me." Her words carried so much pain. "No one can help me except Uinseann and I'm stuck here with more half answers and even more questions than before with no hope of ever going home. The Stargate is locked on Luxima and I don't know what is happening there. There's a Necromancer and a phantom running around and I can't protect my people. I can't even protect myself! I've died twice!"

"Rose, I will help you figure this all out. I promise." He gave her shoulders a squeeze and then dragged his hands over them to her upper arms. He gave her a small singular shake. "You **don't** have to do it _alone_."

"But I am alone!" Rose snapped, tears spilled from her eyes. "Don't you get it, Jonas?! I'm all alone. No matter where I go. I always have been."

"But you're not and you know that." Jonas could see through her act. She was scared and upset and the only people who could really make things better were nowhere around. "You have Jack and General Hammond and Sam, Teal'c… you have me."

Rose didn't know what to say. She just didn't have any more words. She wanted Jonas to stop talking. She wanted the warning bells to stop ringing. She wanted the emergency lights to stop strobing from red to white. She wanted everything to just stop.

And that's exactly what happened.

Jonas stared at Rose. She hadn't said anything or moved for a few minutes. He squeezed her arms and asked her if she were alright, but she gave no reply. She stared blankly passed him at nothing, face just as blank. It was as though she were frozen in some kind of trance.

The emergency lights and warning bells went off and the elevator began to move. It stopped again at the next floor and the doors opened, revealing Jack and Sam.

"Jonas?" Jack asked and looked to Rose. "Rose?"

"Jack, something's wrong with Rose." Jonas replied, not even looking over at the two who looked bewildered at him and Rose.

"What do you mean? What's wrong?' Jack questioned and took a step towards Rose. "Rose, you alright?"

She said nothing and continued her endless stare. Jack waved a hand before her eyes, but she did not blink nor did her pupils dilate or contract. She stood silent and resolute like a statue in a hall.

"What's going on?" Jack looked to Jonas, who had yet to release his hold on Rose's arms. Jonas shook his head and studied her face carefully for any signs of… well, anything. She didn't even twitch.

"Sam, I think we should get Rose to Dr. Frasier. Go call her." Jack looked to Sam, who nodded and headed to the nearest red phone. She picked it up and called for Frasier over the intercom. Jack looked back at Rose and waved a hand before her again, but once more there was nothing.

"Rose?" Jonas breathed out softly. "Where did you go…?"

"What happened?" Jack looked to the younger member of his team and examined him. He seemed genuinely concerned for Rose, genuinely worried about what was happening to her right now.

"We were–" Jonas hesitated and swallowed what he had begun to say. He was caught in a crisis. Tell Jack the whole truth or keep Rose's secrets?

"You were what?" Jack insisted and crossed his arms over his chest.

"We were in my office; talking." Jonas began and looked over at Jack.

"About what…?" Jack encouraged more with sarcasm dripping from every syllable.

"About Luxima and the Elders." He wasn't exactly lying to Jack. He was just omitting very important chunks of the puzzle.

"What about Luxima and the Elders?" Jack stared almost menacingly at Jonas. He knew that he was hiding something, covering something up. " _Jonas_ …"

"Jack, I–" Jonas released his hands from Rose to throw up before himself in defense, but suddenly Rose's form collapsed. Jonas caught her as she fell forward into him. He lowered her and himself to the floor of the elevator, cradling her head in the crook of his elbow.

"Rose?" Jonas asked and patted her cheek gently.

"Were you holding her up the whole time?" Sam asked as she came back to the doorway of the elevator. Jack knelt down on Rose's other side and stared at her.

"Rosie?" Jack called to her gently as one would a sleeping child. "Can you hear me? We don't know what's going on and it's getting really creepy."

"Colonel…!" Sam chided, looking at him incredulously. Jack looked back at her and shrugged, mumbling that it was indeed creepy.

"Major! Colonel!" Dr. Frasier's voice surfaced from the hallway behind Sam. She and two nurses rushed towards them with a gurney. "What's going on?"

Jonas's eyes never left Rose. He watched her carefully for any signs that something was wrong or that she was coming back from her state. Her eyes never closed nor blinked nor twitched. Only her chest rising and falling gave any indication that she was still alive. Then it began to quicken. Short, stifled breaths in and out through her nose. Her chest rose and fell as though she were having a panic attack. Yet, her face never changed. Then she began to shake and spasm.

"She's having a seizure!" Dr. Frasier yelled and pushed passed Sam into the elevator. "Jonas, I need to cradle her head so she doesn't hit the floor. Jack get back."

She knelt down at the crown of Rose's head and took her in her hands, keeping her head safe from the hard ground. Jack stepped back and out of the elevator beside Sam while Jonas moved to the back of the elevator and sat on the ground with one knee bent. They all watched as Rose convulsed. Her body flailed in all sorts of directions. Her eyes twitched, face construed.

After a few minutes, Rose ceased and her body went lax. Dr. Frasier rolled her onto her side in the recovery position and ordered the nurses to help her get Rose on the gurney. In one swift movement Rose was loaded up and was being rolled down the hallway towards the Infirmary. Jonas was right at their heels with Jack and Sam in toe.

Rose was rolled into the medical bay and Jonas stopped at the doorway. He threw his hands to the top of his head, entangling his fingers together and let them rest there. He let out a long, struggled sigh of relief when he hear Dr. Frasier telling Rose that she was alright and safe. Jack blew passed him and strode right into the medical bay, coming to where Rose was placed.

Sam stood outside the Infirmary with Jonas, watching from the doorway. She noticed something in Jonas' eyes.

"Jonas?" She asked and narrowed her eyes. He didn't look back at her, but instead shook his head. His eyes had welled up with tears. He didn't know why, but they had.

"What the Hell is happening to her?" He wasn't looking for any kind of reply, but he got one.

"You think everything that has happened to her is related?" His comment had perked Sam's interest greatly. She had never thought about it. Why would she of? They all seemed like separate instances. Maybe they weren't. Maybe they _were_ all connected somehow.

Sam turned her gaze from Jonas and peered into the Infirmary at the medical bay where Rose laid. Jack stood at her side, holding one of her hands and smiling down at her as he made bad jokes about her resemblance to a fish out of water.

"Jonas, when we were on that Gou'ald Mothership, what happened to Rose?" She looked back at the man, who stood with his hands clasped so tightly on top of his head. His knuckles were turning white. He shook his head again and took a breath.

"I got to the Auxiliary Control and released the sealed door, swam to the control column. I didn't know she was in there at first."

"Wait." Sam cut him off and turned herself completely to face him. "She was in there? How?"

"I don't know."

"Jonas she was in the hall right next to Jack and I. There's no way she could have been all the opposite end of the ship in the Auxiliary Control Room." Sam shook her head, trying to wrap her mind around what he had told her.

"I don't know how she got there, but she was there; floating in the water." Jonas let his hands fall from his head and looked to Major Carter. "She was dead, Sam. That's twice and now she's having seizures. Something isn't right."

"I agree." Dr. Frasier appeared before the two in the hall with Jack at her side. She pulled off her white latex gloves and shoved them into her lab coat. "She's stable for now and conscious. Both good things, but I agree with you Mr. Quinn: something doesn't seem right. I'm going to run some tests and see what I find. Is there anything you can tell me about this specific incident?"

"Like what?" Jonas was at a loss of what information he could provide.

"What was she doing before she seized?"

"We were talking in my office and she took off for the elevator. Then she just froze. Jack and I couldn't get her out of it."

"Then what?"

"She collapsed in my arms and started seizing." Jonas finished, not seeing anything that could have helped in his retelling.

"Was she under any stress? Has she been eating? Sleeping?" Dr. Frasier incited for more information, anything that might help.

"I-I don't know. Today was the first day I had seen her in a week." Jonas replied and shrugged his shoulders. "I haven't seen her in the Mess Hall at all. As far as I know she's been locked up in her room the entire week or so and she's been under a lot of stress since she got stranded here."

"Now that you mention it I haven't seen her for meal call either or walking around the base." Sam spoke up and looked from Jonas to Dr. Frasier. "I'm not sure she's left her room at all since we came back from that mission on the Mothership. Ever since she got separated from Jack and I on that mission."

"I haven't seen her either. Kept going to her room, but she never opened the door." Jack piped up and shoved his hands into his pants pockets.

"Jonas said she died." Sam gave him up and looked from Jack to Jonas.

"Again?" Dr. Frasier looked to Jonas astonished. "H-how did she…?"

"I did CPR like you showed me and she just… _came back_ …" Jonas explained though he wasn't sure that he had been the cause of Rose's second revival. Dr. Frasier didn't respond and instead just looked back over her shoulder at Rose and Jack in the medical bay. She shook her head, mouth slightly agape and eyes bewildered.

Rose was sitting up, covers pulled up to her waist. Her eyes drifted from Jack to the doorway where they met Jonas' stare. Confusion met worry in an awkward kind of embrace as they stared at each other.

"She grew too quiet, stared at nothing for hours, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep..." Jonas mumbled to himself, recalling Daniel's words. Dr. Frasier and Sam both looked at him, intent on questioning him about what he had said. Instead he walked into the medical bay and to Rose's left side. Rose had heard him in the hall and had been thinking the same thing. Jonas looked down at her, meeting her gaze. "He often found your mother standing in the garden with you in her arms, just staring out at the sky with a blank stare."

"Jonas, what's happening to me?" Rose breathed out shakily, dread covering her face. Jonas said nothing and instead took her left hand in his right, gently squeezing it. He stared down at her fingers, noting in his mind how slender and how perfectly it fit in his own. He moved his fingers and entwined their hands together. He shook his head, but said nothing. He didn't know. There were many things he was realizing that he didn't know about this woman and many more things that she didn't know about herself.

"We'll figure it out: together." He looked back at her finally and met her stare. His confidence soothed her a bit and she relaxed, somewhat, into the pillows that propped her upright. She stared down at the white blankets sharply and gripped his hand tightly, afraid that if she let go she might float away into the darkness that seemed too keen on keeping her.


	23. Little Voice Inside My Head

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose had stayed in the Infirmary for overnight observation and had then been released the next morning. That didn't mean she had been released from Dr. Frasier's care though. She was ordered back just about each day for over a week to undergo some new test or something or other to help narrow down what was happening to her.

She knew it was futile though. Somehow she just knew. There was nothing that any of them could do for her. This was out of all of their hands. Her biggest fear was in whose hands was her life now placed?

She had been having strange dreams now as well. Very strange. She was always in the Forest, following behind a group of children with Sabine, the Seeker of the Elders, leading them along. The sky was always an odd color. Bright, but grey and purple clouds hiding the sun. The air smelled of rain, but the grass was dry as ever. They kept walking till suddenly they were at the Ravine. Rose knew this place well even if she did not remember why. Sabine led her and the other children down, down, down ever further into the Ravine until they could not be seen if someone were to peer over the edge. Then they came to a cave. She stared at the cave entrance for a long moment. It was dark and she could see virtually nothing inside of it; hear nothing. She looked back up at the sky again, listening to the crack of the thunder. She then headed towards the cave right as everything went black.

"And you can't ever go passed that?" Jonas asked as he stared at Rose from where he sat at his desk. Rose sat at the high table on a stool, twirling a pencil in her fingers. Her nails were painted a delicate pink that almost blended into her skin color in just the right light. Her hair was pulled back and separated into two braided pigtails that came and rested over her shoulders. Jonas commented in his mind how he liked her hair pulled back from her face.

"That's where it _always_ ends. Right at the mouth of the cave as I'm about to enter." Rose replied as the pencil twirled right out of her fingers, startling her and Jonas. She slapped her hand over it to keep it from sliding off the table and then sighed, resting back in her seat. She didn't understand why she could never enter the cave. It wasn't for lack of trying. She needed to know what was lying in wait at its heart. That was the key to everything.

"Well then that's where you need to go." Jonas encouraged and stood up from his seat. He walked over to her side and sat down on the other stool. He rested the heel of his standard issued boots on the rung of his seat and crossed his arms over his chest, biceps becoming more prominent. Rose's mind stared at his arms for a brief moment, unable to not take notice. He was more muscular than she had remembered.

"Jonas the Stargate is locked on my side. I can't go there." Rose replied softly without a second thought. She turned her gaze away and stared at the fish in the tank before her.

"Not physically no." Jonas shook his head.

"Alright, color me confused. What are you talking about?" Rose turned and looked at him, placing her hands neatly on her knees that were bent up. Her feet resting on the circular bar at the middle of the stool's legs for support.

"What about hypnosis?" Jonas gave a small shrug as he suggested this idea and picked up the pencil that had flown from her fingers. He looked it over and then tapped the eraser on the table top.

"What?" Rose was confused. She had heard of hypnosis before in brief mention years ago during some conversation she had with Daniel and Jack, but didn't truly understand it or what it entailed. "It's a trance isn't it?"

"I guess it's a kind of a trance. It helps people remember suppressed memories and things." Jonas explained and dropped the pencil, looking towards her again. "It's like a dream state except you would remember everything once you woke up."

Rose said nothing at first. She wasn't exactly opposed to the idea, but wasn't too sure of its success either. She turned away from him once more and rested her elbows on the table top. She raised her left hand, placed the tip of her thumb nail between her teeth in a nervous habit as she mulled over the idea.

Jonas watched her. He always watched her. It had become a kind of pastime for him lately when he happened to have a moment to spend with her. Ever since they had come back from the Mothership Mission, she had been distant and then what had happened in the elevator. Jonas scanned her face again, remembering the blank stare she had held on her face for so long. She was there, but not really. Her mind was gone, a million miles away in some far off place that he couldn't reach her in.

 _Somehow you are able to interact with it all on another plane…_

Was that what she was doing when she stared out like that? She was interacting with another plan? The stare she had now was unlike the other though. She was contemplative, really thinking about the hypnosis option. She rubbed her thumb over her bottom lip as she thought and caught Jonas' eye. He couldn't help but watch, like a trance of his own. She, herself, was _entrancing_.

Jonas looked away and closed his eyes tightly. He shouldn't be thinking like that. It wasn't right and it wasn't fair. She was in distress and at risk; vulnerable. He shouldn't think about her like _that_ …

He looked back and came to see that she was now staring at him. Her face had changed, eyes filled with soft worry.

"Are you alright?" She asked gently and waited for his reply. She had done it again. She amazed him. She was fighting some unknown thing, stranded on Earth, suffering memory loss, died twice and she was asking him if he was alright.

"Yeah," Jonas started with a small huffy laugh and ran a hand over his mouth. He laid his hand down on top of hers that rested on the table top and gave it a squeeze, "I'm good."

Rose's lips curled into a smile and she returned his comforting gesture with a squeeze of her own, "Good."

"Knock, knock love birds." Jack's voice came from the doorway. Jonas was quick to pull his hand away from hers and shot up from his seat. Rose's eyebrows knitted together for a brief moment, taken aback by his swift action, and then looked to Jack. Colonel O'Neil looked between the two. He noticed Rose's confusion and Jonas' nervousness and wondered if in some alternative universe he was right and the two really were love birds. Shaking his head he shoved his hands into his pockets.

"General Hammond needs to see us in the Briefing Room. Has a mission for us I assume." Jack looked between the two again. "You two alright?"

"Yeah, we're fine." Jonas was too quick to reply and he knew it too. He construed his lips and sighed shortly, chiding himself.

"He's right. We're fine." Rose confirmed and looked from Jonas to Jack. She tried her best at a smile, knowing it wasn't exactly convincing. What else could she do?

" _Yeah_ …" Jack knew she wasn't

"I have a giant puzzle laid out before me with pieces missing. Important pieces that I need to complete the picture. Until I find them there isn't a whole lot that I can do." She explained the best she could how she was feeling. She honestly didn't know what she was supposed to feel anymore. Angry? Confused? Stressed? She was certainly feeling all of those. Safe? No entirely. Secure? Not really. Sane? Certainly not.

"We're gonna figure this out, Rosie." Jack seemed to ignore Jonas' presence altogether and just stared at Rose. It was no secret to anyone that she had become kind of the daughter he had never had. He never tried to hide it, but no one had ever asked. They didn't have to. "You're gonna be okay."

"One way or another right?" She gave a small dejected laugh and looked down at her hands, picking at the nail polish Sam had painted on her nails.

"Yeah, one way or another." Jack nodded his head and looked to Jonas. His looked told Jonas that this was going to be tougher than either of them had thought. "Come on you two."

Jack walked away and left the two in Jonas' office. Rose stood up from her seat and pushed it in as close as she could to the table. She turned to Jonas and nodded her head, unable to think of something, anything else to do.

"You do know Jack likes you, right?" Rose found her voice and turned gracefully on her heels to face him, hands behind her back. "And that he trusts you around me?"

Jonas looked over at her and gave a small laugh.

"I'm not sure he trusts me with anyone."

"He does." Rose's response was like reflex. "I know he does."

"How?" Jonas was just as quick. Something about the way she had said she _knew_ had made him question. _How_ does she know?

"Because I know Jack…?" She hadn't meant it to sound like a question, but she didn't quite understand what he was expecting her answer to be. Then something clicked in her brain. "Jonas, I'm not psychic. I can't see into people's minds… if that's what you were wondering."

"No, but I do wonder about everything that Daniel had written about you." He narrowed his eyes, not in anger or confusion, but in wonderment. "You're kind of an enigma."

"I'm a what?" Rose's expression contorted into a mix of bafflement and insult. Jonas realized that she had never heard the term before and quickly backpedaled, stumbling over what he had meant.

"It's just that – well you're kind of – you just…" Jonas couldn't seem to find the right words and chided himself for being so clumsy and ungraceful. "I can't figure you out."

Rose stared at him long and hard. Then she cracked, little by little, until she was laughing softly, but genuinely.

"Jonas," she began and tilted her head slightly with a smile on her lips, "I'm the easiest person to figure out."

He could see it there in her eyes. Carefree, happy; normal. For a brief moment she was okay. She wasn't worrying about what was happening to her or what might happen or whether or not she would ever get her answers. She was just… there.

"Uh..." Jonas began and faltered. He blinked a few times and watched her, his stormy blue eyes meeting piercing sapphire. Those sapphires held so much behind them; mystery, sadness, happiness, kindness, love…

Jonas was about to say something, something he shouldn't say, but the alarms went off and interrupted him. The red emergency lights flashed in the halls. An unscheduled visitor through the Stargate. Rose and Jonas didn't bother to say anything and jogged out of the room, heading towards the Briefing Room. General Hammond and Jack were already there with Sam and Teal'c.

"There you two are." Jack scoffed, shaking his head at them. "You kept us all _waiting_."

Rose could hear the sarcasm in his voice and rolled her eyes. Jonas stood beside her, looking around at everyone. There was no one new. So what was going on?

"We received a transmission from P2S-4C3."

"Where's that?" Rose asked, looking around at them all. She had yet to read over the files and reports that she had been ordered to months ago when she had first arrived. She was a bit behind and had now just realized how far behind she was.

"Kelowna." Jonas answered, but didn't return Rose's gaze. She knew that was his home planet. The same home that he had betrayed in order to try and redeem himself for everything that had happened to Daniel.

"The man identified himself as Commander Hale, Chairman of the Kelownan Defense Council." General Hammond answered as he took a seat at the head of the long table. They all followed suit and sat in their usually places. This time, though, Rose sat between Teal'c and Jonas and not beside Jack. This got noticed.

"Well, he's been promoted. When I left, he was Undersecretary for Military Appropriations." Jonas explained as he rubbed his right hand over his knee, right leg crossed over his left. Rose had the urge to reach out and grab his free hand, offer a reassuring squeeze as he had done many times for her, but she stopped herself. She asked herself what she was doing, what was she doing here and now, instead of trying to figure out what was happening to her.

 **You don't have the missing pieces, remember?**

She hated the little voice in her head and missed Gaenor. She would have offered more welcomed help. She didn't trust her own brain at the moment and having Gaenor would have been one more person to help her; relieve some of the burden on her shoulders.

"Well, according to their commander, the Kelownan government wants to reestablish trade relations with Earth." Sam's voice brought Rose back from a darker place. She looked across the table at the other blonde and then looked to Jack, who was beginning to seethe.

"I hope you diplomatically told him where to shove it." Jack heatedly spoke up. Rose knew why and understood why, but she didn't approve. Daniel wouldn't approve.

"It's not that simple, Colonel." General Hammond gave Jack the stare, silently telling him to calm down.

"They tried to frame Daniel." Jack threw back as his only weapon.

"I don't think it's fair to judge the entire population by the actions of a few scientists." Jonas tried to reason, feeling torn between the two sides that were becoming apparent.

"Jonas is right." Rose's gaze had never left Jack. He looked back at her, wanting to say something, but thought better.

"You're a pain in my ass just like Daniel was." Jack grumbled and leaned back in his seat.

"The Kelownans are technologically inferior to Earth. They have little to offer." Teal'c spoke from where he sat resolutely and properly in his seat beside Rose. She looked to him and even though he was very good at keeping his feelings hidden, she could feel the loathing radiating off him like a burn.

"Except naquadria." Sam interjected.

"Which doesn't work." Jack turned and looked at her beside him.

"The hyperspace drive on the X-302 didn't work." Sam began and looked at everyone around the table. "That doesn't mean we should give up. Naquadria is still our best bet for creating shields and weapons capable of repelling the Goa'uld. We **need** this."

They all looked around at each other. No one wanted to be the first to speak. Jack didn't even bother to meet anyone's gaze fully. He looked across the table at Jonas secretly and caught site of Rose staring at him.

"It's settled then." She breathed out and gave a fake smile, standing up from the table. "SG-1 will meet with this Commander Hale and seek negotiations for the acquisition of naquadria and learn what they desire in return."

She looked around at everyone, hands clasped before her and waited to see if anyone protested. Jack leaned back in his seat again and crossed his arms over his chest. Her gaze dared him to speak up in defiance against her. This is what Daniel would have done. Harboring hatred and resentment against a whole planet for his untimely death wasn't him. She wouldn't allow his memory to be in such a light. No matter what she was going through personally at the moment.

"Well said. You've turned into quite the diplomat." General Hammond commented from where he sat with a small approving beam. "SG-1 will meet with Commander Hale and discuss negotiations for acquiring naquadria and seeing what they want in return."

Rose nodded her head and turned to head out of the Briefing Room.

"On one condition." Jack's voice stopped her in her tracks before she could get to the door. She didn't even want to turn around and face him. She knew what he was going to do. "We need **all** members of SG-1 present and accounted for. That includes you."

Rose closed her eyes and breathed slowly, releasing a small _dammit_ under her breath. She let her head roll back and stared at the ceiling a moment to compose herself. She wasn't ready to go back out on duty. She didn't want to put aside her personal matters again and go seek negotiations with a race that had labeled one of her closest friends as a conspirator.

Rose gave a short wave in understanding and agreement before walking out of the room. She headed down the hall and instantly didn't know where on Earth, literally on Earth, she was going to. She had no desire to retreat to her room and she didn't feel right invading Jonas' space any more than she had. That left her with three options; gym, mess hall, or Dr. Frasier. She was sick of being a lab rat and she didn't have any appetite. Gym it was then.

She headed to Level 21 where the gym resided and headed into the locker room. She quickly changed into the simple black sports tank and yoga pants Sam had given her and headed straight for the treadmill. She didn't bother with a warm up and just hopped on, bringing the speed up to a decent jogging pace.

 **What happened to your parents? What happened in your childhood? Why can't you remember?**

The little voice inside her head returned, but with Daniel's words, floating around in her mind. She closed her eyes and willed it away before opening again. She didn't need the distraction. No matter how important or how personal. She couldn't do anything until she spoke with Uinseann. Whenever, if ever, that would be. Till then all she could do was put on a mask and get on with her life. The best she could till whatever end.

 **Everything you know about the Elders, about the Gou'ald coming to Luxima, about what they were there for; it was all a lie. They're all covering something up. Something that happened to you back when you were a child. The Elders erased those memories to protect you or to cover up whatever they were doing or letting the Gou'ald do.**

Rose cursed that little voice to disappear from her head. All it did was make her angry.

 **Somehow you are able to interact with it all on another plane. You can sense when something isn't right in the world. Your long dazes into space, maybe you've never really noticed or just simply shrugged it off, but you feel something; you know something even if it isn't clear to you.**

She began to increase the speed on the treadmill. She began to run.

 **Mysticus… It's what your people used to describe as magic and those who had abilities to communicate with spirits, interact with the dead, and feel things that were unnatural, even use unnatural means to combat them. They had power, real power, and sometimes it ended badly. Very badly.**

"Get out of my head…" She growled under her breath as she ran. She could feel her heart pumping masses of blood. Her face was surely flushed.

 **She was "claimed" by the darkness. Lucretia, your ancestor, was Hell bent on seeing the White City burn to the ground. It became necessary to put an end to her wrong doings. The Elders were afraid of you and what you might be.**

"Shut up." She barked and pressed the up button on the treadmill again.

 **Your mother grew too quiet, stared at nothing for hours, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. She would stand in the garden with you in her arms, just staring out at the sky with a blank stare. She became defiant and unruly. She would disappear for days at a time. She was accused of practicing the Black Arts. They claimed to have spotted her by a waterfall chanting and making the water boil.**

"Stop it." Rose begged as she tried to keep up with the treadmill. She was sprinting, treadmill on high.

 **She had saved people on the verge of death with just a gentle caress of her hand. Animancy to necromancy: Conjurers who turned dark. Using their powers for so took its toll on them. Everything has a price. Nature cannot be tricked nor cheated.**

"STOP!" She yelled and hit the emergency stop button on the treadmill. She haphazardly rode the belt down and her back hit the wall, sliding down it to the cold floor. Her knees bent up to her chest and elbows resting against them as her hands cradled her head. Her eyes were wide, staring out at nothing as the treadmill finally came to a stop. Her breathing was erratic from stress, from anger, from running away for so long. She desperately wished for answers, but there was no one to give them. There was no way home. There was nothing she could do. Nothing.

She didn't like not having control. Not knowing what was happening or what would happen. She didn't like the feeling that kept resurging through her veins, foretelling that something bad was bound to happen. She also didn't like the voice that lurked in the recesses of her mind. She had been so grateful for Gaenor. She had silenced it with their merging. She had kept Rose sane and now she was unraveling like a ball of yarn. Soon she would get to the end; whatever end and she would come out stronger. Either for the better or worse. She just worried, no feared, which of the two it would be.

Better?

Or worse…?


	24. Kelownan Delegation

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose had taken a long and very hot shower, trying to wash away everything. She was on the verge of a total mental break, but she couldn't break down yet. Not yet. There were too many things, too many people and they all relied on her. For now all she could do was run herself ragged, sob in mist of a hot shower, pull on her clothes, and soldier on. She was a Bellona, a Gunda, and an Elder. She had to be strong.

She headed out of her room wearing the most professional thing she could find in her closet. It was the uniform of a Gunda when asked to present oneself in court. It was one of the only outfits she had taken with her when she ran away from Luxima so many years ago. She pulled on the pair of fitted tanned pants and the black peasant top. She then situated herself with the sapphire dress corset, securing it on her with the straps that went over her shoulders. She then sat down and pulled on her boots, one at a time. They stretched up just below her knees on top of her pants and clicked as she walked. She hadn't worn this in years and yet it still fit the same. It made her feel safe, secure, at home almost. It was familiar. She needed familiar.

She headed for Jonas' office and slowed when she heard voices.

"The Kelownan delegation will arrive soon." It was Teal'c. Rose supposed Jack asked him to retrieve Jonas.

"Yeah…" Jonas sounded melancholy and she could hear footfalls, guessing that he was pacing around the room. She understood why.

"Is there a problem, Jonas Quinn?"

"I've just been, uh… so caught up in being a member of SG-1, I kinda forgot how this whole thing started." Jonas gave a dejected laugh and sighed. Rose moved closer and stood outside the door, leaning her head against the wall. She understood perfectly where Jonas was coming from. For a while, she too had forgotten why she was here with SG-1; what had brought her here, what had happened on Luxima, everything. She had gotten caught up in it all. Just as she had before when she first met Jack and Daniel on Abydos.

"We have taken similar paths. I, too, was forced to betray all of that in which I had placed my faith." Teal'c spoke up again. His voice was so deep and so steady. Rose admired him.

"I don't know if I can do it, Teal'c. I mean, they think that I'm a… a traitor." Jonas could hardly finish his sentence. The word was so bitter on his tongue.

"When I returned to Chulak after leaving the service of Apophis, I, too, was considered a traitor, Sholva, to my friends and family that I had left behind. In their eyes, I was dead." Teal'c voice changed. It was a mixture of sadness and resentment. Rose turned herself around and rested her back flat against the cold, hard wall. She looked up at the ceiling, her French braided pigtails pushing against the back of her ears.

"It must have been hard for you to go back." Jonas' voice betrayed him. He hardly knew what to say. He hadn't done anything like what Teal'c had. Jonas felt like a traitor.

"What I did, I did for my people. In time, they came to understand this." Teal'c clarified.

"Well I don't think my people are ever gonna have a chance to know the truth."

"Then you must draw strength in knowing that your cause is just, Jonas Quinn." Teal'c consoled him. "One day your people will benefit from the sacrifices that you have made."

Rose turned her head, the glow from the lights of Jonas' office falling on her face. Teal'c words were true. For the greater good, sacrifices have to be made. She had learned this as a Gunda and again as an Elder.

The room had grown quiet. Rose took the opportunity to round the doorway, acting as though she had just made her way down the hall, and stepped into the office.

"Are you both ready?" She asked and looked from Teal'c, who nodded, to Jonas. He didn't meet her gaze, but nodded as well. "Alright. Then let's do this: together."

Rose, despite Jonas avoiding her gaze, gave him a small smile anyways. She then urged them both to follow her to the Embarkation Room where the others were wainting. They walked the hall in silence and soon came to the Embarkation Room. General Hammond, Sam and Jack were already waiting for them at the end of the Stargate platform. They all took their places as the alarms went off, warning them all of an incoming wormhole.

Rose looked to Jonas on her left with Jack standing at her right. She could see the worry and the anxiety etched into his face. What would they say when they saw him standing here in SG-1 uniform? Would they say anything at all? Would they forget all negotiations and demand his immediate arrest? She looked down at Jonas' hand by his side. It was clasped to tightly, shaking from the blood rushing through him. She gently took it, easily forcing his fist open and held it in her own. She gave it a squeeze when she had turned her attention back to the Stargate. Jonas had turned to meet her gaze for the first time just as she had turned away.

The Stargate finished dialing and a wormhole came through. The blue, luminescent puddle flickered and rippled. Suddenly three bodies came through. Two men and a woman stood before them at the top of the platform. They walked down the platform together in unison and Jonas squeeze Rose's hand tighter. She moved a little closer to him, shoulder to shoulder, hands pushed back behind them.

"I am General Hale." A man in a military uniform announced. "This is Ambassador Dreylock and Dr. Kiernan."

"Welcome to Earth. I'm General Hammond." Hammond greeted and then looked down the line at the rest of SG-1. "This is Major Carter, Teal'c, Rosalina, Colonel O'Neil… and of course you know Jonas Quinn."

Dr. Kieran nods his head slowly towards Jonas.

"It's good to see you, Professor." Jonas greeted, but Dr. Kiernan ignored him and didn't respond. Jonas' smile faded, but Rose gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

"General, I believe we have a lot to discuss." Dr. Kiernan turned his attention to General Hammond. General Hammond looked to the team, already sensing this was a regretful start and looked towards the door of the Embarkation Room.

"Right this way." General Hammond raised a hand and pointed in the direction he was to lead them. They all leave except for Jonas, Rose and Jack. Jonas' eyes followed the exiting delegation with hope that Dr. Kiernan would look back. He didn't and the doors shut.

"Friend of yours?" Jack asked, noticing now that Rose and Jonas were holding hands. Jonas nods, obviously upset and Rose placed her free hand on his upper arm in comfort.

"He was, uh," Jonas began as he searched for the right way to describe the situation, "one of my teachers at university and then he recruited me into the naquadria project. We've been working together side by side the last six years."

Jack sidestepped the pair and followed after the delegation. Rose walked in front of Jonas, forcing him to look at her. His eyes were on the verge of welling up, the hurt a knife to his heart. Rose wasn't quite sure what came over her. She took her hand from his and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him into an embrace. Jonas wasn't sure how to react. It took a moment for him to register what was happening and then he slowly wrapped his arms around her back. He could smell the sweet scent of vanilla in her hair that tickled his nose.

"Don't worry Jonas." Rose spoke up, her breath warm and moist against his ear. "We're on your side. No matter what happens."

She slowly pulled back and looked up at him with a sincere smile that he appreciated. He gave her a single nod and then they followed after the delegation themselves. Everyone was standing around the Briefing Room table, awaiting instructions when the two arrived. Jack gave Rose and Jonas a sideways glance. He had been growing curious about how much time they had been spending together and now it was becoming clear why.

"Please, sit down." General Hammond motions a hand towards the empty seats. The Kelownans and the members of SG-1 all sit in an awkward silence. "I must admit that we were a little surprised to hear from you given the circumstances of our last encounter."

"I'm sure we all regret what happened, but I don't think anything was said or done to damage relations between us irreparably." Ambassador Dreylock began, slowly meeting the gazes of the SG-1 team.

"You accused a member of my team of sabotage to cover up your own incompetence."

Jack all but spat back at her. Rose would have smacked him if he wasn't sitting so far away from her. They didn't need to start negotiations this way.

"And you received stolen goods and are harboring a **traitor**." General Hale immediately eyed Jonas. Jonas couldn't stand the look Hale gave him and turned away. Rose tilted her head, narrowed her eyes and set a heavy stare at this General Hale. She had met many men like him before.

"Traitor is a strong label, is it not?" Rose began with an even tone and a snarky smile. General Hale's attention came to rest on her as her expression changed. She slowly and meticulously crossed her legs and rested her hand on the table top, entwining her fingers. "Kind of like imbecile… or _murderer_."

They stayed locked in a silent battle undistracted by the looks everyone else was giving them. She was not about to be intimidated by the likes of him.

"Perhaps it would be better if we focused on the matter at hand." Ambassador Dreylock interjected, trying to calm the storm that was growing quickly. General Hale looked away first and turned his attention to General Hammond. Jack looked over at Rose and nodded his head in approval, thinking to himself: score 1 for Earth.

"Which is what, exactly?" General Hammond asked and looked to the Kelownan delegation.

"For several years, an uneasy peace has resulted from the rivalry between the three major powers on our planet— Kelowna, Tirania and the Andari Federation." Ambassador Dreylock explained and looked to the two men at her sides to confirm. "All of that is about to change."

"According to our foreign intelligence service, the Tiranians and the Andaris are about to sign a non-aggression pact. This would leave us in a very vulnerable position." General Hale continued further.

"I'm just curious." Jack began and raised a finger as though asking a teacher a question in class. "What made you think we would care?"

Sarcasm dripped from every word as he spoke. Sam looked to him with an eye of disgust at his attitude and shook her head.

"We still have something that you want, Colonel." Dr. Kiernan spoke for the first time. Very level headed and calmly looking to Jack. "Naquadria."

"In fact, thanks to recent discoveries, we have a considerable surplus." Ambassador Dreylock explained and looked around at the SG-1 team.

"We know that you're decades ahead of us, technologically. In the field of jet propulsion alone, you could provide us with a significant strategic advantage." Dr. Kiernan grew emboldened and now they all knew what the Kelownans were after.

"You want us to give you military technology." Sam spoke what everyone was thinking.

"Without it, Kelowna faces annihilation." General Hale tried to reason with the skepticism in Major Carter's voice.

"You are assuming they intend to attack." Teal'c turned his attention to General Hale.

"The treaty is an obvious prelude to war. If we wait for them to make the first move, we won't stand a chance." General Hale was becoming heated once more.

"See, we've been down this road before." Jack was quick to cut him off.

"On a previous off-world mission, we encountered a race known as the Eurondans. They were losing a war and they offered us technology in exchange for our help. We then discovered that they were guilty of attempted genocide." Sam clarified, looking from one of the delegates to another. This was news to Rose as well.

"I hardly think this situation compares. All we want is to protect our people." Ambassador Dreylock huffed with a laugh, looking to General Hammond.

"I understand, but given our past experience, we are reluctant to interfere in the affairs of another planet." General Hammond made clear, folding his hands on top of the table.

"According to Mr. Quinn's original report, you regularly interfere in the affairs of a race known as the Goa'uld." Ambassador Dreylock was quick to throw that in their faces.

"Well, that's a little different." Jack interceded. "The Goa'uld enslave millions of people across the galaxy."

"If you were to provide us with the means for a quick and decisive victory, you could potentially save hundreds of thousands of lives. If not, we would have no choice but to fall back on our last resort." General Hale was frustrated and his tone portrayed just how much.

"Dr. Kieran and his team have successfully tested a naquadria bomb." Ambassador Dreylock had just released a bomb of her own upon the team. "Its destructive power was beyond all expectations. If you do not help us, we will have no choice but to use it."

"There's always a choice and you're choosing **annihilation** of not one, but two nations on your planet." Rose's voice was steady, but it held something deeper in it; something more sinister. "Just remember that everything has a price."

Rose pushed herself back from the table and excused herself, walking out of the Briefing Room. She heard General Hammond call for a recess as she headed down the hall. Footsteps followed her closely into Jonas' office. Rose walked to the back, arms crossed over her chest and shaking her head.

"Do you believe the Kelownans are truly facing annihilation?" Teal'c asked from where he stood by the door. Jack and Jonas had both taken a seat while Sam stood by Teal'c.

"Just before I left, we did a detailed projection based on this scenario." Jonas leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "We calculated that the combined enemy forces would achieve total air superiority within the first five weeks of the war."

"So if the Kelownans are gonna to use the bomb, they'll have to do it fast." Sam surmised, pacing slowly back and forth.

"They're probably considering a pre-emptive first strike." Jonas confirmed and sat back in his chair.

"Really?" Jack seemed genuinely surprised by this. Rose did as well.

"Colonel, I helped research this report. If they stick with conventional weapons, we are looking at a complete collapse of their entire military within six months." Jonas was appearing desperate for them to negotiate something with the Kelownans, his people.

"Can't they negotiate? I mean, what are they fighting for anyway?" Sam stopped and looked down at Jonas.

"Well, there are a thousand different grievances that go back generations." Jonas began and ran a hand over his mouth in a nervous habit. "The last major conflict we had was 20 years ago, nothing was resolved. The only difference is that in the past the Tiranians and Andaris hated each other more than the Kelownans."

"Apparently, they got over it." Jack piped up softly.

"Not helping Jack." Rose snapped as gently as she could. She leaned back against the bookcase and stare down at the ground.

"It's a marriage of convenience. Sooner or later they'll turn on each other, but by then it'll be too late for Kelowna." Jonas looked around at them all.

"Jonas," Jack began and stood up from his seat. He look down at the younger man, "you're a member of SG-1 now. Your priorities have changed. Jonas slowly nodded his head and looked away. Rose didn't feel that was fair. Those were his people no matter what had happened. Jonas may have switched sides during a conflict that had resulted in a life lost and stolen goods, but he couldn't stop caring for the people he had grown up with.

"Excuse me." A voice came from the doorway where a soldier stood. "General Hammond would like to see you in his office Colonel O'Neil."

Jack said nothing, but nodded and stood up from his seat. He exited the room and soon after so did Sam and Teal'c. Rose watched Jonas from where she stood. He slumped his shoulders and moved to rest his elbows on his desk, putting his face into his hands.

She wanted to say something to him, but what? There was nothing she could say to make him feel better or to make the whole situation better. This was becoming a theme lately. Impractical situations with no answers.

She pushed herself from the bookcase gently and walked over to him. She crouched down beside him and placed a hand on his back, rubbing up and down comfortingly.

"I feel like I'm being pulled two ways." Jonas spoke up and lifted his head from his hands. He covered his mouth with one hand and stared out from his desk to the wall. He shook his head and leaned back, Rose pulling her hand away. She stood up and turned her back to the desk, sitting on the edge of it slightly.

"I wish I knew what to say to you." Rose began and tried even then for something more to say that would help. "There's no right answer in a situation like this. I understand that you choose to come and join SG-1, but I also understand loyalty to your own."

"I just don't want to see them all die." Jonas looked up at her and met her gaze. He chewed on his bottom lip and then turned his head, raising his hand to his mouth. Rose nodded her head, but had nothing to say. She looked down at his hand, wanting to reach out and take it, but felt odd suddenly about the action. It didn't matter though because Jonas stood up and went to the bookcase, pulling out a book.

"Would you like me to leave?" Rose asked as he went to sit on a stool at the high table in the middle of the office. He stopped before the stool and tapped the book against his hand. He turned quickly and stared at her, trying to decide what to say. He looked her over, noticing what she wore for the first time.

"You wore that the same day that I scared you while you were listening to Dr. Jackson's music. Vivaldi right?" Jonas asked as he let the book fall to his side in his hand. Rose looked to the small table pushed against the wall. The CD player still sat on top, most likely with the same CD inside from that same day. She remembered that day. Of course she remembered it.

"You called me spunky." She replied and looked back at him.

"And you called me odd." Jonas replied, the two sharing a small laugh together. Jonas looked down at the ground and then at the book in his hand. "I thought I could make a difference. Turns out I can't do a damn thing."

Jonas' words struck her. Her gentle smile fell at being hit by her own words. Jonas had remembered everything from the conversation that day; everything. From what she wore to every word she said.

"Jonas –"

"I think it's probably best if I have some time alone." Jonas cut her off and moved to the stool. He sat down, propped up his feet on the table and opened his book. Rose didn't understand, but she was hurt a bit by his actions. She licked her lips, nodded her head and headed for the door. She stopped beside him, looked down and waited for his gaze. It never came though. She sighed softly and took a step behind him, placing her hand on his shoulder. She gave the muscle a squeeze and began to walk away, but Jonas caught her hand tightly in his own. She should go, he had said, but really he wanted her to stay.

Jonas' hold slacked, but only enough for him to rub his thumb over her wrist. He stared down at his open book, but Rose doubted that he was actually reading. Rose moved closer and placed her other hand on his opposite shoulder, placing her cheek on top of his head gently. Jonas pulled her hand across his chest, bringing the other hand along from his left shoulder and crossed them over his front so that she was embracing him.


	25. Meeting on Kelowna

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose and Jonas had stayed in their quiet embrace for a long while before a knock came from the door. Rose lifted her head to see who was there and her eyes widened. Embarrassed she quickly patted Jonas on the shoulder and stepped back from him. She nodded her head at Dr. Kiernan in greeting and gave a short smile.

"Forgive the intrusion." He nodded back at Rose and gave her his own smile. He then looked to Jonas, who swiveled in his chair and then bolted up from his seat. The book that had rested in his lap fell to the floor with a loud, clumsy _thump_ and startle Rose. She gave a small tremor and looked to the book, moving quickly to pick it up. She hugged it to her chest and looked from Jonas to Dr. Kiernan, smiling more awkwardly then she had intended.

"Hello Dr. Kiernan." She greeted finally, fingers tapping against the book cover.

"Professor, I didn't know you were back." Jonas quickly spoke as he tried to tidy up the small office. He oved some folders around and then picked up a stack of books from the swivel chair by the CD player.

"So this is where you're working now." Dr. Kiernan gave a smile as he looked about the room. Books sat shelved in every crevice. Papers and folders askew on tables and the desk. Dr. Kiernan's eyes came to rest on Rose again and he nodded once more in approval. What he was approving of, Rose didn't quite know.

"Yeah. When, uh, when I'm not off world." Jonas motioned for Dr. Kiernan to sit down in an empty seat by the CD player. Rose side stepped to the right, closer to Jonas to allow Dr. Kiernan to sit.

"Off world…" Dr. Kiernan repeated with a dreamy stare. He gave a small laugh and nodded his head at his own thoughts. "You must have seen some incredible things."

"You have no idea." Jonas replied with a grin.

"Well, you were always a dreamer, Jonas." Dr. Kiernan's tone changed suddenly. His words chided Jonas and his actions. "Of course, some of us had to stay behind to deal with reality."

"I had to leave." Jonas was quick to fire back. His voice was stern, but not angry at what Dr. Kiernan had implied. "I mean, these people have a much better chance of doing something useful with the naquadria than we ever had."

"What good is that to Kelowna?" Dr. Kiernan had thrown a low blow that hit Jonas hard. Jonas just shrugged and turned away in frustration. What good was that to Kelowna?

"Well, if they can master shield technology, they'll share that with us." Jonas tried to reason, but Dr. Kiernan was a firm disbeliever.

"They won't even share their most basic military hardware." Dr. Kiernan turned slightly in his seat and looked directly at Rose. "Did they ever share it with your people?"

"We never asked." She answered honestly. "We never had a reason to need weaponry like what you and your people are asking for."

"We need to defend ourselves." Dr. Kiernan could see that Rose was not going to be any help in convincing anyone to give the Kelownans military hardware.

"You come to them as a representative of only one nation. What the people on our planet need to do is to get over their differences and unite." Jonas moved closer to Dr. Kiernan and sat down on the stool nearest his seat. Dr. Kiernan looked back at Rose and gave her a warm, but fake smile.

"Would you mind terribly if I spoke to Jonas alone?" He asked very politely. It was hard to say no. She looked to Jonas. He nodded slowly at her in agreement and then slowly she headed for the door. "Could you close the door behind you?"

Rose stopped and looked to Jonas again. That was an even odder request. Very odd. One that she didn't like at all. Closing a door to a room with a man who comes from a planet and a nation where Jonas is called a traitor... she was hesitant to say the least. Jonas saw the trepidation in her eyes and stood up from his chair. He took the book from her hands and wedged it beneath is arm for safe keeping.

"It's alright, Rose." Jonas whispered and nodded his head, giving her the go ahead. She didn't like it, but she trusted Jonas and his judgement.

"I won't stray too far should you need me." She replied, looking passed Jonas to Dr. Kiernan and giving him a hard stare.

"Thank you." Jonas placed a hand on her upper arm, gave her a squeeze and then moved back to his seat. Rose left and closed the door behind her. She took a moment and waited outside the door.

"Well, she's something, isn't she?" Dr. Kiernan's voice floated from behind the door.

"Yeah, _something_." Jonas replied. Rose could hear a chair moving across the cement floor.

"It's easy to see why you chose come here." Dr. Kiernan's words held something behind them. "Pretty girls, off-world exploration… any man's dream come true."

"Why did you come back, professor?" Jonas ignored his comments and Rose smiled. He hadn't taken the bait. Rose slowly walked away from the door and headed down the hall. She didn't go too far, but just far enough to be out of earshot. She found a placed on the floor and sat, closing her eyes.

* * *

"Rose?" A voice called to her. She gave a wide yawn and slowly opened her eyes, finding Jonas crouched before her. "What are you doing on the floor?"

"I told you I wouldn't go far." She spoked through another yawn and began to pick herself up from the ground. Jonas extended a hand to help her and she took it, legs a bit wobbly.

"You haven't been sleeping, have you?" He asked gently, not quite sure whether or not he had asked aloud. Her eyes met his and she tried to smile, but it faltered.

"It's hard to sleep." She began, but didn't finish. He didn't need to know everything; every worry, every fear. He had his own problems to deal with. "May I ask what Dr. Kiernan was so keen on having you to himself for?"

"That's where I was going now. I need to speak to everyone." Jonas let go of Roses hand and motioned for her to follow him. They headed to the Briefing Room where General Hammond and the others already stood.

"When are they going to move against the government?" General Hammond was quick to ask as soon as they had stepped into the room. Rose looked from the General to Jonas, confused by what he was talking about.

"I'm sorry, but who?" Rose asked, feeling like she was missing a vital piece.

"Dr. Kiernan came to me and told me that there is a resistance group forming against the different governments. They want to prevent full-scale war." Jonas looked to General Hammond. "I don't know, but if they intend to prevent a war, they're gonna have to do something fast.

"That will not prevent their enemies from attacking." Teal'c clarified.

"According to Dr. Kieran, there's popular support for a negotiated settlement in all three countries." Jonas looked to Teal'c and then back to General Hammond and Jack. "Now, they believe that if the resistance can seize power in Kelowna this will compel the other governments to come back to the table or risk similar uprisings. At the very least, they'll be too busy dealing with internal discontent to launch an attack."

"If they can pull it off, we might have a more viable trading partner." Sam looked around the room at them all, arms cross over her chest.

"We need a lot more intel before we proceed with anything." Jack turned to General Hammond. The General nodded his head as he mulled everything over.

"The Pentagon has authorized SG-1 to return to the planet and offer the Kelownan government nonmilitary technology in exchange for naquadria."

"They will never go for it." Jack shook his head and looked up at the ceiling.

"Maybe not, but we have to explore every avenue." General Hammond agreed silently with him. He began to head towards his office. "In the meantime I want you to make contact with the resistance and determine their strength, their numbers and their chance for success."

SG-1 was left standing in the Briefing Room, looking around at each other. Jack caught site of Rose. He noticed her arms crossed over her chest and the expression on her face; hard at thinking.

"Something you want to say Rose?" He asked her and suddenly all eyes were on her. She didn't even bother looking at him and instead just shook her head. She raised a hand to her face and gently scratched at her brow. She began to shake her head again as he hand fell to her side. She didn't like this. She had dealings with resistance groups on Luxima before. They were usually nothing more than gangs who wanted power to push their own agenda and didn't care who got caught in the crossfire.

"I'll go prepare." She spoke finally and exited the room without meeting anyone's gaze. The last thing she wanted to do was to upset anyone, most of all Jonas. Dr. Kiernan appeared a gentle, thoughtful man, but there was something off about him that Rose didn't like. Jonas trusted him though. He was his professor, his mentor, his friend and she couldn't destroy that image of him because of just a feeling he gave her.

She headed back to her room and shut the door behind her. She moved to her closet and began to undress. She reached out and took hold of another black peasant top, but froze. She was about to get into her Upper Gunda uniform. The one that Jack had repeatedly referred to as _inappropriate_ , but stopped herself. Her hand fell and slapped against her side as she stared at the uniform.

For so long she had dreamed of leaving Luxima. Running away from the Elders, avoiding her responsibilities, starting over where no one knew her… and she had. She had gotten away from it all and fled to Abydos through the Stargate, found Jack and Daniel, came to Earth, enjoyed life there for a short time away from it all.

She had gained a sense of duty and maturity from being around Jack and Daniel. That's when she had decided to return to Luxima. Having been away for so long, having gained so much from Earth, it was time to face reality and she had gone home. She had gone back to the Elders; back to people who didn't trust her and whom she didn't trust either; back to a torn city full of resentment and secrets; a place where she never truly felt at home. She never truly felt she belonged. She had made a choice, an exchange. She had foregone her own happiness for the happiness of her people.

Daniel had told her she was brave. Jack had told her she had simply grown up. Now she faced another choice.

Rose looked around in her closet again, pushing the Upper Gunda uniform aside. Her hands landed on something more appropriate with patches and sigils attached to it. She pulled it out and looked over the Sage Coverall Uniform. On the sleeves were patches indicating SG-1 and the Stargate. The material was much rougher than her other uniform, baggier, but it had been hers many years ago and now it was again.

She couldn't get home till the Stargate opened on Luxima. Until she got home she couldn't get answers. Without answers she couldn't do much of anything to help her people or help herself. But she wasn't sure she really cared anymore.

Rose undressed and pulled on the standard issue black t-shirt. Then she carefully climbed into the coverall, zipping it up. She took the vest that went along with it and zipped it up as well, moving back to the closet once more. She bent down and pulled out the black boots, pushing aside her brown buckle boots that belonged with her Gunda uniform. After tying them to her feet she stood up and stared at herself in the mirror.

So much had happened in such a short time. She didn't feel like the same Rosalina. At least not the same one who had been thrown through the Stargate months ago by some Necromancer. She didn't look like the Elder Elvira of Luxima or the Upper Gunda Commander or the orphan girl who struggled to figure out a past she had been forced to forget.

She was just Rose: a girl that didn't know what direction the universe was pulling her in.

Rose locked on her eyes in the mirror. She stared for a long moment. They were the only thing she recognized of herself anymore. What was it she wanted? To get away from the Elders, away from Luxima? Accomplished. Then why didn't it feel better?

 **Because you don't belong here… anywhere…**

Rose took her gaze from the mirror and turned her head to the side. She hated the little voice, but it was right. She was an orphan girl pretending to be something she wasn't; an orphan girl with no home and nowhere to go. The Elders didn't need her nor want her. Her own father didn't want her. Her own mother had vanished, abandoning her in a city that looked down on her and questioned her every action. Why then did she care so much about going back?

Her eyes drifted to her bedside table. The stargazer lily sat there in the frame, pressed and preserved forever. Her mind drifted to Daniel, to Gaenor, to wherever they both were. How she longed for either of them, both of them, to be standing there with her and telling her what to do. Gaenor would tell her to trust her head. Daniel would tell her to trust her heart.

 _"_ _When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us."_

One door was closed, for how long she did not know, but there was another open. For now, she would set aside her thoughts and worries about questions unanswered. For now she would focus on the people here and now that mattered. When the door that had closed finally did open, she would go through it. That's all she could do for now. Follow the doors that opened to her and hope that eventually she would open one that had behind it what she was looking for.

A knock came from her door. She turned and looked at it as it opened. Jack stood there in his gear, hand resting on the knob. He examined her from head to foot, surprised to see her wearing the SG-1 uniform.

"If Daniel were here he'd had something really snarky to say." Jack took a step into the room and grabbed hold of the straps to his vest. Rose gave a small snort of a laugh and closed her closet door.

"I don't know what else to do or how to act, Jack." She admitted to him and shrugged. "I feel stuck."

"I know kid." He replied and moved closer to her, placing his hands on her shoulders. He didn't like seeing her like this. She was struggling. Really struggling and no one could help her. "But you're okay right now. That's what matters. Sure, you keep kickin' the can here and there, springing back from the grave, but you're still here; you're still alive."

"Jack, I'm not afraid to die." She replied and looked up at him.

"Of course not. You're a pro at it by now." He joked and Rose found it slightly funny, refusing to laugh though. Jack could see her try to hide a smile. "We deal with crazy things all the time. Weird, other plane things sometimes too. Take Daniel for example. He's an Ascended being now, floating around the universe, giving advice to people who don't want it."

"You've seen him huh?" She asked with a smile.

"Wait, you knew he was one of those jerks?"

"I had an inkling." She replied and looked over at the Altar sitting peacefully against the wall. Jack said nothing and instead he nodded. He understood there were _things_ about Rose that he would never understand completely. He still didn't understand the relationship Rose and Gaenor had fully and that issue was many, many years old.

"Gaenor?" Jack asked suddenly. He hadn't really been able to talk to Rose for quite some time. Her dying and going into seizures and all. Rose looked away and shook her head. She really didn't know where Gaenor was. For all she knew, Gaenor was long gone; moved on or otherwise.

"You may not have the answers you need, but you still have people who are willing to help you get them." Jack assured her. He found this conversation was becoming awkward and the others were waiting for them in the Embarkation Room.

"Thank you, Jack." She had needed to hear it from him.

"Come on." Jack headed for the door and Rose followed behind him, closing her bedroom door behind her.

* * *

Dr. Kieran stood in the Embarkation Room as a number of SFs entered, followed by Jonas, Sam and Teal'c. Jonas walked up beside Dr. Kieran and nodded at him in greeting as he fixed his vest.

"Are you ready to go home?" Dr. Kiernan asked, but Jonas shook his head with a huff of a laugh. Home… he wasn't sure he could call it that anymore.

"Well, I'm not expecting a parade." Jonas replied and looked up at the Stargate.

"Not everyone in Kelowna thinks you're a traitor. After you left, all of us working on the naquadria project began to question what we were doing. You opened our eyes, Jonas." Dr. Kiernan explained, hoping to incite something in him. However, it had the opposite reaction.

"Anyway, it's just temporary." Jonas turned away from his old professor and looked at the Stargate. "If I stay a minute after the negotiations are finished, I'll be arrested for treason."

"That will all change after the resistance takes power." Dr. Kiernan again tried to put hope into this resistance group he kept mentioning. His eyes gravitated to the door to the room as Jack and Rose entered. "Well that's certainly different."

This got Jonas' attention. He turned and looked from Dr. Kiernan to the door, seeing Rose coming up with Jack. She was dressed in the standard SG uniform, sage green and baggy. It **was** certainly different then what she normally wore. She looked… normal. He wasn't quite sure that he liked it. Her other clothes, other uniforms, they were different from anything he had seen. She was different from anything he had ever seen. It was one reason why he liked her so much.

"She looks cute in it though, doesn't she?" Dr. Kiernan's comment brought Jonas out of his small trance and he turned to stare at the older man. Dr. Kiernan had his hands behind his back and wore a small smirk, knowing Jonas too well. He raised a hand to his face and tapped a finger right by his eye. "It's the eyes, I think."

"All right SG-1. Let's move out." Jack ordered and headed up the platform towards the Stargate. Rose looked over at Jonas and Dr. Kiernan, curious about what the look on Jonas' face was for.

"Everything alright?" She asked, looking between them. Neither of them turned to look at her, but Jonas managed to mumble out a yes. She gave them another look and then went up the platform with the two bringing up the rear.

* * *

Kelowna was not what Rose had been expecting. The city was very different from the White City where she grew up. Smoke rose from tubular shaft on top of buildings that she swore nearly touched the sky. They were crafted of some kind of reddish-brown stone and above them flew large metal aircrafts of some kind. Rose had seen similar things on Earth, but these looked different from Tau'ri constructions.

SG-1 was led through a long hallway on one of the top floors of a very tall building. Jonas explained away who they would most likely meet with and where in the building certain places were. Rose was only half listening though. She instead observed, taking everything in as she went.

They arrived at the Kelowna Conference Center where a conference table sat awaiting them. The doors were closed behind them and they were told someone or other would be with them shortly. Rose moved to the large windows and looked down at the city. Teal'c came up beside her with his hands behind his back, observing as well.

"Very different, isn't it?" He spoke to her as his eyes scanned the buildings below. She nodded her head, but said nothing in return. "I thought the same thing when I compared the White City to Chulak."

"Now they are not so different." Rose smiled and looked up at him. He gave her a sidelong glance, smirk forming softly on his lips. They both turned back to the window and Rose gave a small laugh, shaking her head at Teal'c. She turned around and looked about the Conference Room. It looked like every other conference room she had seen on Earth; a large table, cups and water, banners on the wall. Her eyes continued to drift until she landed on Jonas. He looked around the room, seeming to be familiar with it, touching the table gently as he ran his hand along it. He moved to the back wall where the banners hung and looked up at them. As if feeling as though he was being watched he turned and spotted Rose's stare. She smiled at him gently.

The door to the Conference Room opened and three Kelownan diplomats entered the room. They headed for the conference table as everyone turned to look at them.

"Hello again." Ambassador Dreylock looked around at them all, giving them an apologetic look. Rose noticed that she seemed tired, stressed. "I apologize for the delay but, these are difficult times for us. May I present First Minister Valis."

She motioned a hand in the direction of a man we had not yet had the pleasure of meeting. Rose took a chance and looked over at Jonas. He knew this man, of course, and his expression showed his nervousness.

"First Minister, these are Colonel O'Neill, Teal'c, Major Carter, Rosalina Levana…" Ambassador Dreylock began to introduce and fell quiet when she got to Jonas.

"…and Jonas Quinn. It's good to see you again, Jonas." Valis greeted Jonas with a smile, which put Rose on edge. That was not the normal reaction Jonas got from diplomats of Kelowna. At least not the ones she, herself, had had the pleasure of meeting.

"Thank you, sir." Jonas replied and gave a small bow of his head.

"Shall we?" Valis outstretched a hand towards the table, encouraging them all to take a seat. Valis sat at the head of the table with General Hale and Ambassador Dreylock to his right, followed by Jack, Rose, Sam, Jonas, and Teal'c on his left.

"Have you spoken with your superiors?" Dreylock asked and looked directly at Jack.

"Why yes we have." Jack replied and laced his hands together on the table top. "They send their best."

Dreylock and Valis shared a look of worry with each other. Rose sat up straight in her seat and laced her hands in her lap, preparing to speak.

"We have been authorized to carry on with the trade negotiations." Rose spoke up and looked from General Hale to Dreylock to Valis. "However, before we can continue, there is something I would very much like to elucidate. Back on Earth, Ambassador Dreylock referred to recent discoveries leading to a surplus of naquadria."

"Yes, our archaeologists have discovered a series of mine shafts beneath the original site. We've managed to extract and process a considerable amount." Valis explained.

"How much exactly?" Sam suddenly became interested. Valis looked to her and gave a small smile.

"I thought you might be interested in the figures so I had it converted to your weight system. I believe it's something in the area of 300 pounds." Valis continued and looked back to Jack and Rose, seeming to understand they were the ones he was negotiating with. Sam looked absolutely stunned.

"Uh, that's an awful lot of dangerous material." She began with a nervous laugh. "If you like, I could take a look at your storage facilities. I might be able to offer some useful advice."

"That won't be necessary." General Hale suddenly spoke with finality.

"It's purely a matter of safety. As Major Carter said the naquadria is extremely dangerous and we'd hate for some sort of… _accident_ to happen." Valis responded to General Hale's exclamation, indicating towards the accident that had already happened with Daniel. Valis' eyes trailed to Jonas, his words having been meant for him.

"Clearly you have more naquadria than you require. What, precisely, are you asking for in return?" Teal'c leaned closer to the table and looked to Valis for a direct response.

"We need to start by addressing a serious imbalance in air power." General Hale answered instead and leaned on the table. "Our enemies have superior numbers in both strategic bombers and long-range fighter escorts. Our only hope to counter them is to get our jet interceptor program off the ground."

"We've had some technical difficulties with the program," Valis interjected as Hale began to become heated, "but we have managed to successfully test a few designs. We believe that with the help of Major Carter and a team of your engineers, we can have a combat-ready squadron in less than a month."

"Well, that's not exactly what we had in mind." Jack came back with and leaned back in his seat. Rose side glanced him and then looked back at Valis.

"We understand from Jonas that Kelownan medical science currently has little or no defense against bacterial infections." She began and earned the First Minister's attention once more. "We' are authorized to offer you a series of drugs known as antibiotics. We estimate they may save 15,000 or so lives in the first year alone."

"That **is** a generous offer and under different circumstances, we might accept. But at the moment, we have more pressing needs." Valis tried to sway, but it fell on deaf ears and silence engulfed the room. Rose nodded her head and looked to Valis once more.

"May we take a short recess and discuss?" She asked as politely as she could. Valis looked to General Hale and Ambassador Dreylock before nodding in agreement.

"Yes, I think that may be a wonderful idea." Valis agreed and stood up from the table. Rose was first to join him, bowing her head to him as she had been taught to do as an Elder. "IF you wish, Dr. Kiernan is in his lab. I'm sure he would like to visit with you all."

Ambassador Dreylock and General Hale both stood and began to walk towards the door. Valis stopped at the end of the table and looked back at Jonas.

"I expect you remember where that is Jonas?" Valis' words had a hidden message behind them. Rose took the place at Jonas' side and just stared at Valis. Jonas gave a small nod, but said nothing. Valis exited the room and closed the door behind him.

"Well, shall we then?" Jack asked and headed for the door. Rose side stepped and put herself before Jonas. The other turned and watched, noticing that the two weren't behind them.

"What are you doing?" Jonas asked and looked down at her. Her eyes were steady and pierced through him in a way he had never felt before.

"He's testing you." She spoke without a smile and a stern expression. "Next time he makes a comment like that you need to assert yourself."

She spoke seriously so that he would remember, not so he would think she was chiding him. She wanted him to be strong and take charge. She wanted him to show them all that he wasn't the weak willed person these diplomats seemed to believe he was.

"Make sure he knows who you are." She finished and then turned away from him, following the others to the door. Jonas stayed rooted to his spot for a moment and then trailed after them. Jack stood right outside the doors as the others headed down the hall and walked along with Jonas.

"What was that about?" Jonas asked quietly so the others wouldn't hear. Jack looked to him and then turned his gaze to Rose.

"She's right." Jack looked back at Jonas again. "She's trying to help you. Situations like these are her specialty."

Jonas nodded his head and looked to Rose. He had almost forgotten what she did before she came to Stargate Command. She, herself, was a diplomat. If she told him to assert himself, then he would try.


	26. Sapphires

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

"How are the negotiations coming?" Dr. Kiernan asked as he entered his lab. Rose took notice that he rubbed his head excessively as he came to stand by his research table. She sat on a stool beside where Jonas stood at the table. Her fingers tapped against a jar of some kind of red goo.

"Well, after four hours, the only thing we could agree on was to adjourn for the day." Jonas answered him as he looked over the different things on the table. He then crossed his arms over his chest and shook his head. He couldn't believe that they had been so stubborn; both sides.

"We're clear, Sir. No bug." Sam announced and put the sensor she held away. Jack nodded at her and then looked at the rest of his team.

"I do not believe the Kelownans will settle for anything less than military technology." Teal'c was quick to begin. Rose looked across the table at him and nodded, completely agreeing with his summation.

"They know how much you want the naquadria and they think that eventually you're going to give them what they want." Dr. Kiernan placed both his hands on the table and leaned a bit closer to them.

"In the meantime, we need you to take us to this," Jack began and searched or the correct phrase, "resistance."

"Well, it's not that simple. I don't get in touch with them, they get in touch with me." Dr. Kiernan had left this tidbit of information out the last time. Rose and Jack's eyes met without either of them turning their head. Neither of them liked the sound of this.

"What exactly do you do for them?" Sam questioned and looked at him from across the table. This was a very good question that Rose commended Sam for silently.

"Well, I keep them apprised of all the top-level research at the Academy of Science." He replied and shook his head. He seemed very adamant about his position within this group.

"Where do you meet them?" Jack crossed his arms over his chest, bouncing from one foot to the next.

"They have a base of operations in an old warehouse by the freight yards." Dr. Kiernan began to explain and looked around at them all earnestly. "But, it's very heavily guarded."  
"Take us there." Jack ordered.

"I can't." Dr. Kiernan again shot down Jack's request. "I'm not even supposed to go there myself unless I have a scheduled drop."

"Professor." Jonas spoke up, hoping at his insistence Dr. Kiernan would lead them there. He looked to Jonas and nodded his head after a moment in agreement.

"All right. I'll talk to them." Dr. Kiernan agreed as Rose and Jack shared another look of apprehension. They were both losing hope in this _resistance_ group that Dr. Kiernan seemed to support whole heartedly. The longer and more aloof this group was, the worse it was to them. Rose noticed a clock on the wall behind Jack. It was starting to get late and it seemed as though they weren't leaving until they met the infamous resistance group.

"I really do hate to break up this party, but I'm wiped." She announced and leaned back in her seat. Sam nodded her head in agreement, feeling tired as well. "It was a long day. May we retire?"

"Yeah," Jack started and uncrossed his arms, "Yeah, I'm a bit tired too. Let's call it a night."

Teal'c stood from his seat and pushed his stool closer to the high table. Rose did the same and walked around Jonas to Dr. Kiernan.

"Thank you, Dr. Kiernan." She gave him a small peck on the cheek and smiled at him before heading to the door where Jack stood. Dr. Kiernan looked to Jonas and beamed a bit at him. Jonas placed a hand on his shoulder and said his goodnight, following the others out of the lab.

* * *

They all had expected small, individual dwellings for the night. However, First Minister Valis had seen to putting them in some kind of suite. When they first walked through the door they were greeted by a large living room with a large crescent couch that sat down in a step-down with a glass coffee table. A set of large, two story windows covered the back wall giving the space lots of natural lighting. There was a lip to the windows with tall columns that divided it into sections where one could sit and stare out. When they walked further they saw a staircase that led to a second floor where several bedrooms sat.

"Wow." Rose breathed out as she looked around the space. Jack made for the stairs with Sam behind him, both heading straight to bed. Their doors closed behind each of them with a faint click that echoed throughout the suite. Rose looked at Jonas and Teal'c, smiling at them before saying goodnight and heading up the stairs herself. She stopped a moment in the hall and stood at the railing to peer into the living room. Then she headed into an empty room and closed the door behind her.

It was a decent sized room that held a full sized bed, covered in white sheets and comforter. A tall dresser sat to the side with a lamp sitting on top of it along with a chair and a short table off in the corner. It was just enough to keep her from claustrophobia. She walked to the bed and took off her vest, then her coverall. She quickly undid her hair from the braided French pigtails and then drew the covers back, crawling into the bed in nothing more than her underwear and the black t-shirt she wore. It took only a moment before she was out, drifting far away into unconsciousness.

She didn't stay that way for long. Her dreams had taken her to a dark place like usual. The Forest, the Ravine, the cave that she could never enter, and then there was a small sound coming from it that she had never before heard… she woke up in a fit, huffing with gooseflesh crawling over her skin. She threw the covers off and swung her legs over the side of the bed. Her eyes drifted to the dresser and she dared to open up one of the drawer. She was greeted with strange clothing. She searched through the drawer and luckily found a somewhat generic looking pair of pants. She pulled them on, finding they were incredibly baggy.

She walked out of her room quietly and padded down the stairs. She thought about sitting on the welcoming couch but instead chose to head to the windows, sitting on the ledge with her legs stretched out. It wasn't padded and it was cold, but she enjoyed the view. Her eyes drifted upwards towards the night sky, not recognizing the constellations as she wiggled her toes that were free from socks and those uncomfortable boots. She wondered where in relation to Kelowna Luxima was in that expanse of sky.

Rose heard a small click from somewhere in the suite and then the familiar thudding of boots with a heavy rubber sole. Her head turned and she caught sight of Jonas heading down the stairs. She smiled at him as he headed over to her and took a seat on the opposite side of the ledge. He propped up one leg beside hers while the other he extended on the floor.

"Couldn't sleep either?" She spoke in a soft voice as not to disturb the others. Jonas gave a small snort of a laugh and shook his head. She knew exactly what that meant. He couldn't sleep, couldn't even think about trying to sleep. There was too much on his mind.

He turned his gaze out the window and looked at the city. Rose watched him carefully, observing his expression, the way he held himself. Something was definitely on his mind, but as she had told him before: she wasn't telepathic. She couldn't read minds.

"You want to talk about it?" She whispered again, but again Jonas said nothing. So she dropped it all together. If he wanted to talk, then he would. He didn't need her of all people pressing him. She turned her head and stared out the window again, letting the back of her head rest against the column that divided this window from the others.

After a while, Rose sensed eyes on her and turned to look at Jonas. He rested back against the column behind him with his head tilted back, but his eyes were transfixed on her. She stared back at him, but then her hands began to tingle and her heart beat faster. She breathed a little deeper and tried to hold her composure under his stare.

"What?" She asked gently, his stare beginning to unnerve her. He said nothing again and only continued to watch her. It wasn't a bad stare or an odd stare, just a stare with thoughts and curiosities behind it. The moonlight that shone through the window caught his face when it appeared from behind a cloud. He seemed almost unreal to her in that moment. She felt butterflies flutter in her stomach and she had to look away or else she would blush. Her eyes found something to watch outside in the city that slept.

Jonas didn't turn his gaze away though. He continued to watch her and think as she tried desperately to avoid his look. A small smirk came to rest on his lips when he realized that he was making her nervous. He watched her as she stared out the window at the city below. Her smooth, cream colored skin seemed to glow under the light of the moon. Rose reached a hand up and brushed her hair behind her ear. Jonas could see her eyes now fully. He would almost say they were smoldering, but that wasn't quite the right term. The blue was so deep and so vibrant that when the moonlight bounced off the color they really did look like sapphires. It was like he was staring at the gem beneath a microscope. He had never seen such eyes before. They were–

"… _beautiful_ …"

The word had escaped his lips before he could stop it. Rose's attention snapped to him, staring at him fully. Now he was nervous.

"I uh… I just meant…" He tried hard to backpedal, but he was making himself sound like a fool. A knock came from the door to the suite and both of their gazes fell in that direction. Another knock came, slightly louder and registered this time with the both of them. Jonas stood up and headed for the door, grateful for the distraction. He scolded himself for having been so dumb and opened the door. Rose sat up straighter and swung her legs over the side of the ledge, tilting left and right to see who was at the door at this time of night.

"First Minster Valis would like to speak with you." A woman's voice announced and Rose could barely see her form from behind Jonas.

"Now?" He asked, surprised by the late night call.

"Yes. He is waiting for you in the Conference Room." The woman replied. Jonas looked back at Rose, seeming to be caught at a pass and unsure what to do. Rose said nothing, did nothing, and soon he was out the door and following the woman down the hall.

* * *

Jonas was escorted into the Conference Room by the woman and the doors were shut behind him. Valis sat at the head of the table where he had earlier that day with only a few lights lit and shuffling through papers.

"First Minister." Jonas greeted from where he stood by the doors.

"Come in." He waved at Jonas to come further into the room. Valis rose from his seat to meet Jonas at eye level and held his hands out before him. "I wanted a chance to talk to you Jonas, away from the negotiations."

He gestured to the seat beside his and Jonas walked around the table to take it.

"It's difficult for me, Jonas, seeing you sitting across the table, acting as the representative of another planet."

"It's not easy for me either." Jonas agreed and made eye contact with him. "But I made my choices and I'm going to stick by them."

"I'm sure you thought you were… doing the _right_ thing." Valis began and then trailed off. His words were like a smack to the face, but Jonas, remembering what Rose had told him, wouldn't allow him to intimidate him.

"Oh, I know I did the right thing." He was quick to respond, lacing his hands on the table top and leaning closer. "Stargate Command is going to use the naquadria to come up with technologies that may one day save this world from an enemy you can't possibly imagine."

"You were one of the most promising young men any of us had ever seen." Valis spoke evenly and tried to tempt Jonas with guilt. Jonas sighed heavily and fell back into his seat. "Our people had such high hopes for you."

"You're not the only one who was disappointed." Jonas fired back with. He wasn't going to allow himself to fall into any kind of trap.

"I know that you think this is the same old bad blood resurfacing again. Just," Valis sprung forward in his seat as he became suddenly heated at the subject, "another round of petty violence, but it's not. This time… **this time** , Jonas, we face total defeat."

The room fell silent as Jonas tried to think of what to say.

"Then get back to the negotiating table. Give up some land. You do **whatever** it takes."

"You know how much the Tiranians and the Andaris hate each other." Valis sprung up from his seat and began to pace back and forth slowly on the other side of the table. "Do you really think that they overcame two years of prejudice just to get us to give up a little land? They mean to **destroy** us, Jonas. This is merely the first step in a fight for world domination and the naquadria is the only advantage that we have."

Valis quit his pacing and turned to Jonas. He lifted a finger, waving it slightly and then pointed at Jonas, "And that, is where you come in, my friend."

"I come in?" Jonas didn't see where he was going.

"You're a man of unique talents, Jonas, and despite what you did, I know that it's not too late for you to serve your country. I'm offering you a second chance to do that." Valis' voice trickled off in a breath. An image of Rose materialized in his head. Her face as she sat on the window ledge, staring at him after she had heard the word slip from his lips. Those piercing eyes…

"If you're asking me to gather information about Earth technology, that's **not** going to happen. I will **not** betray my friends." Jonas was intense and firm. He would never do that to them. He couldn't.

"On the contrary, I'm asking you to help a friend." Valis faltered at the end and covered his mouth with a hand. Jonas watched him, thinking this was another rouse, but Valis was too quiet. He wasn't meeting Jonas' look. "Dr. Kieran hasn't been the same since you left. Unfortunately, the strain of completing the naquadria project has… well, it has taken its toll. Lately, his behavior has become increasingly erratic."

"How do you mean?"

"We're concerned that in his current state, he may be prone to errors of judgment. We want someone to watch over him." Valis stated as though it was the simplest thing in the world.

"You mean spy on him?" Jonas shot back, not liking what he was being asked to do.

"He trusts you, Jonas, and he is still very important to us." Valis sat down on the edge of the table and stared at Jonas hard. "If you do this… you will be granted a full pardon. You will be reinstated into your position at the academy. Your life will resume as though none of this had ever happened. It's time, Jonas, for you to come home."

Home…

Jonas didn't know what to say to that. He was being offered a full pardon, his job, and to come home. Valis was offering him his life back.

His old life…

Jonas looked up at Valis.

* * *

Jonas walked into the suite and shut the door as quietly as he could. He started to walk away, but stopped to remove his boots. They were heavy and clunky and made too much noise. He left them by the door and made for the stairs. Something moved on the couch in the step-down and made him freeze. Soft breathing filled the large space.

Jonas moved closer and looked over the back of the couch. Rose laid there at the end with a small, square pillow beneath her head and her hands tucked under it. She was scrunched up so tight that her knees almost touched her chest. Jonas looked around the room and spotted a blanket thrown over the back of the couch a ways down from her. He grabbed it and stepped down to her, unfolding it. He gently draped it over her, making sure that her bare feet were covered so they wouldn't freeze in the night. He made to move to the stairs, but her voice caught his attention.

"Wait…"

Jonas turned around slowly, dreading the realization that his act of kindness had woken her up. She hardly slept as it was and he certainly didn't want to be a reason why she lost more. But she laid still on the couch in the same position, eyes closed and breathing softly. He saw her face move as she instinctually swallowed, lips smacking together gently in her sleep.

"Jonas…" She whispered and rubbed her face against the pillow. A smile crept onto her delicate lips as she seemed to relax even more into the couch. Jonas tiptoed closer and kneeled down next to the couch. He stretched out a hand and tenderly brushed her hair back from her face, placing it behind her ear. She twitched in her sleep and Jonas worried again that he had woken her up, but she simply took hold of the blanket and tucked it under her chin. She sighed heavily and Jonas could tell that she was deep in sleep, not likely to wake up for anything.

Jonas watched her quietly for a long moment. She licked her lips, which drew his eyes directly there and he found himself staring. They looked so soft; so plump. He suddenly was wondering what they would feel like against his own. He suddenly pictured himself leaning closer, it would only be a few inches to get there, and taking her lips in an embrace.

His face flushed and his heart raced. His body began to tingle all over with anticipation. He had to look away and then closed his eyes tightly, telling himself he shouldn't think such things. He picked himself up from the floor and headed straight for the stairs. He looked over the railing as he ascended and watched Rose sleep before heading into his room, shutting the door behind him.


	27. I'm Fine

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

"You have surface to air missiles that are capable of destroying enemy bombers before they reach our cities." General Hale had already come into the Conference Room heated and ready for a fight. He grew ever more heated with each passing second.

"Yes, we do." Rose sat beside Jack, back straight and hands clasped on the table top. She spoke calmly for Jack. He had enough of the diplomats and had handed it over to her. "However, we are not authorized to offer these to you."

Jack swiveled back and forth in his seat, eyeballing General Hale, "Sorry. No can do."

Rose side glanced him with a glare, telling him silently to butt out.

"It's purely a defensive technology." General Hale was quick to retort, ignoring Jack altogether. Rose licked her lips and chose her words carefully.

"Yes, it is." Rose nodded her head, but dragged her hands from the table. Jonas looked over at her from where he sat at the table between Sam and Teal'c. He then looked to General Hale and finally to Valis. It had been going on like this for hours. General Hale would get heated. Rose would stay composed, trying to deflate the situation. Valis just watched, running a hand over his beard now and again as he thought. Jack would pipe up with some unnecessary, pointed comment whenever he got bored.

"But, unfortunately," Rose began again, looking down at the table and lifting her eyes carefully to meet General Hale, "one day, by accident of course, you take down an enemy aircraft that was simply defending their city. Then quite suddenly, they become not just _defensive_ but **offensive** technologies. We simply cannot allow that and it is not out of spite, but out of conscious efforts to avoid aiding any and all parties in bringing about needless war."

"Any superior defensive technology can ultimately be turned into an offensive advantage." Teal'c confirmed, trying to support Rose, and with just as much composure.

"But we are not the aggressors here." Dreylock was stunned by the assumptions they had cast on them.

"Perhaps not today, but was it not you who said you wanted a **quick** and _decisive_ victory?" Rose questioned and looked to Dreylock. Rose took a breath and sighed, tapping her fingertips lightly on the table as she spoke. "We can only assume that means you intend to pursue any and all advantages that we can provide you with. Including, offensive technologies."

"Yes." Valis shot forward in his seat and stared Rose down. "As a means of saving lives."

"By taking lives!" Rose countered, her eyes piercing through him.

"First Minister?" A woman called from the doors to the Conference Room. It took Valis a long moment before he finally tore his gaze from Rose and looked to the woman at the doors. Rose licked her lips and turned away from him, readjusting herself in her seat.

"Excuse us a moment." Valis stood from his seat and walked to the woman, followed by Hale and Dreylock. They spoke in whispers, looking back at SG-1 now and again. Rose tilted her neck to the left slightly, releasing a small crack of the tense muscles. She took a deep breath and sighed, wanting to be done with these dealings. She could feel the radiating dislike and contempt coming from her right where Jack sat.

"This is proving _quite_ fruitless." Jack leaned forward and looked over at Jonas from across Rose and Sam. Jonas looked back at him and only offered a shrug. "Have you spoken with your professor?"

"No, I haven't seen him today." Jonas replied, finding it odd now that he hadn't seen Dr. Kiernan yet. Valis turned back towards the conference table.

"We've just received intelligence that the Tiranians are massing their troops on our northern border." He announced with a fire surfacing in his eyes. They all stood from the table, feeling the tension in the room growing thicker.

"Have they broken off diplomatic relations?" Rose asked quickly. The diplomat in her was searching for a peaceful way out of war. At least for Jonas' sake.

"Not yet." Dreylock replied, looking from First Minister Valis to her. Rose nodded her head and looked over at Jack. He knew what she was thinking and gave a single nod as a go-ahead.

"We still a chance then." Rose spoke up and turned back to the three Kelownan delegates. "We will talk with them."

"You?" Valis was utterly surprised.

"There are many skilled diplomats at Stargate Command. Perhaps it might help to have an objective third party travel to them and discuss negotiations on your behalf." Rose tried to explain, but she could see that Valis would have none of it. He shook his head vigorously.

"No. I'm afraid that's impossible." Valis' tone went softer. He ran a hand over his mouth and looked to the others on his side of the table.

"Why?" Sam asked suddenly, looking from one of them to the next. They looked at each other worriedly.

"They don't know about the Stargate." Rose breathed out, eyes widening as she realized what was going on. She couldn't contain the chiding laugh that escaped her. "Do they?"

"No they don't and having a third party would require us to reveal the existence of it." General Hale confirmed and averted his gaze. Rose closed her eyes and tried to control her feelings. Secrets never did anyone any good ever.

"Maybe that's not such a bad idea. Once they realize the kind of advancements they can acquire through peaceful negotiations, they may not be so eager to attack." Sam tried to rationalize, seeing that Rose was at her end.

"You are asking us to reveal something to our sworn enemies that we have yet to admit to our own people." Ambassador Dreylock revealed, causing Rose's eyes to snap open.

"What?" She was quick with her response, staring right at Dreylock. "You haven't even told your own people?"

"Looks like it's time you did." Jonas piped up with enthusiasm. Apparently he saw an opportunity that no one else did. "Think about it. If everybody knew that this was just one of thousands of inhabited planets, don't you think that they would start focusing on their similarities instead of their differences?"

"That's a noble sentiment, Jonas." Valis replied, looking down at the table top with worry etching his features. "Of course, if it were that simple, I'm sure the existence of the Stargate would be public knowledge on Earth, as well. Isn't that right, Colonel?"

"Yeah…" Jack replied cautiously. Rose turned on him. Her eyes begged him to explain. She had thought all these years that the Stargate was public knowledge. On her planet it was. Why were these two groups so opposed to the idea?

The room fell silent. Rose looked back at the Kelownan delegates and licked her lips.

"Perhaps a short recess is in order. I'm sure you need to consult about what to do next." Rose looked directly at Valis, who shared her desire to leave the room and the negotiating table. He gave a short nod and then turned to Dreylock and Hale, motioning them to follow him out. Rose's gaze followed them and then came back. She looked across the table at nothing in particular and began to think; thinking became mindless staring; mindless staring became drifting and soon the world around her was lost to her. Rose's sight phased in and out, blurry to clear, as her mind drifted away from her. It was the oddest thing. A feeling of sorts pulling her away to another place.

"What do you think, Rose?" Jack turned on his heels and looked back at Rose. She stood in her spot at the table still and stared across the room at nothing. She wasn't blinking. Jack got worried. "Rose? _Hellooooo?_ Space cadet, come back."

Rose could hear Jack. His voice was far away though, muffled, slowly echoing out to her. An image was forming in her mind, a person in a brown suit, weathered hands rubbing a weary head. It was so foggy. The most she concentrated on it the further Jack and the others became.

"Is it happening again?" Jonas asked, watching her closely. She stood as still as a statue just as she had in the elevator. He moved closer to Rose, brushing passed Sam and Teal'c without a care. He stopped beside her, hovering over her.

"Is what happening again?" Teal'c asked, looking to Jack. "O'Neil?"

"Rose, she," Jack didn't know how to phrase it, "she's been going into these trances or something lately. When she came out of the last one she had a seizure."

Teal'c looked to Rose with interest. He arched a single brow and watched as she stood resolute, no response, no nothing.

"Rose? Can you hear me?" Jonas waved a hand before her eyes, hoping to break her eye contact. Nothing happened and again she said nothing.

"Colonel?" Sam asked and looked to Jack for an order. What should they do? What could they do? What if she went into a seizure again? Dr. Frasier wasn't here and Sam doubted that the doctors on Kelowna were equipped to handle something like that.

"Rose? You gotta snap out of it." Jonas called softly again and tempted to place a steady hand on her arm.

"Wait Jonas." Jack called and grabbed hold of the younger man's arm, watching Rose with a firm eye. Jonas looked back at her and then leaned to the left slightly to get in her line of sight. He could see her pupils dilating and contracting, over and over, as though they were trying to focus on something that wasn't quite there. It was like looking at something in the distance, eyes struggling to make out the image.

"Something's definitely happening." Jonas commented and pulled his arm free from Jack's grasp. Jack had let it slip away and had gone to Rose's other side. He looked to see what Jonas had saw, what had him worried. Her eyes continued to dilate and contract, breathing ever so gently as though lost in a dream. It was the only sign she was still there.

"What the hell's goin' on with you, kid…?" He asked under his breath, looking her over as though the answer would be written somewhere. Hoping it would be there…

Jonas looked over at Jack. Worry radiated off of him despite his Colonel straight poker face. He had heard his words, heard the tone, and knew how he felt about Rose. Jonas looked back at Rose and tentatively reached out a hand to her. He rested it on her arm, looking up to her face to see if something changed.

Suddenly Rose blinked. She turned her head and looked to Jonas to her left as though she had been woken from sleep. She blinked again and again, expression telling Jonas she was a bit flustered and confused.

"You alright?" Jonas searched her eyes, trying to see something within them that would give him an answer; any answer. She deserved at least one. Rose opened her mouth to reply and knitted her eyebrows together, changing her mind about what she was going to say. Instead, she replied with something no one expected.

"Would Dr. Kiernan happen to be in his lab this time of day?" She asked without acknowledging what had just happened or confirming whether or not she, herself, were alright. Rose looked to Jack and then back at Jonas. She had heard them both calling to her. She had felt Jonas' touch on her arm, but she had been blind to what was in front of her. Her sight had gone elsewhere while her body remained in the Conference Room with them. The feeling that had pulled at her had drawn her somewhere else entirely.

Jonas looked to Jack, both exchanging expressions of concern and interest. They couldn't be sure whether she was actively avoiding, a very Rose thing to do, or she really hadn't stopped to think about what had just happened. Did she even realize? When she got like that, did she know? Did she blackout? They both couldn't be sure now that she even knew when she went into these trances.

"Probably. Why?" Jonas replied, looking down at her in question once again. He had yet to let his hand drop, holding onto her arm securely, but gently. She knitted her eyebrows together in thought and shook her head, looking off again.

"I'm not sure, but I think something is wrong with him." She replied slowly. She tried to recall the feeling, what she had seen, but it was a fog; like waking from a dream too soon. She looked to him again and licked her lips. "I can't explain it, but I feel it. I…"

She had wanted to say, _I saw it_ , but how would they react to that? How was she reacting to it?

"Good. Going with the gut. I like it." Jack proclaimed good-humoredly and waved his index and middle fingers in the direction of the doors. "To the lab we go. SG-1, movin' out."

Rose made to follow after Jack and the others, but Jonas' hand on her arm stopped her in her tracks. She looked down at his hold and then met his eyes.

"You didn't answer my question." Jonas was testing her. He needed to know whether she was avoiding to spare the rest of them or simply had not heard his question as she had come out of her trance. She looked between his eyes and then took hold of his hand that laid on her arm. She held it gently with one hand beneath and the other on top as though you would when consoling someone.

"I'm fine." That was the only answer she was going to give him at the moment because it was all she knew. She was fine. _For now_. How long it would last was another story. She couldn't be sure, but she felt something was coming; something big; something important that was directly related to what was happening to her. For the first time, she could actually say she was fine and mean it. She didn't care about the questions or the answers. Things were beginning to reveal their self to her. At least, she hoped they were…

She patted his hand, gave a small smile and then let go to head after the others. Jonas stayed behind a moment and ran the hand over his mouth, letting it and the other rest on his hips as he thought. Her answer hadn't convinced him even though it had convinced herself.

* * *

It didn't take too long to get to Dr. Kiernan's lab. However, at seeing the door closed tight their hearts dropped that he would actually be in there. Rose had walked alongside Jonas all the way here. She hadn't looked at him, but she had sensed that he had cast his gaze on her multiple times along the journey. She didn't understand what he wanted from her. The truth?

The truth was that she was scared. She didn't understand what happened to her when she got pulled away or what caused it. It hadn't felt like before though. Before she had gone somewhere dark, someplace cold and unwelcoming. This time was different. She could tell she hadn't strayed too far, that she was still _there_ , on this plane. It was just another thing that would be left unanswered; another thing she would have to learn to cope with, control somehow. She feared what might happen if she didn't. Would she drift away into eternity; to that dark place that kept drawing her back; that seemed to desire her so strongly?

Rose ventured a glance at Jonas. His back was straight, shoulders pulled back and gait was of a man with a mission. Yet he was incredibly worried, anxious. Of course he was… his home was on the brink of war, his friend was a solid part of a resistance group bent on destroying the government, and he was considered a traitor in the eyes of his people. Then there was her, his–

Rose looked away from Jonas and watched the floor as each of her feet touched it; each step purposeful. What was she about to say? His friend? That was true. He had told her so. Then why didn't the term settle right with her?

They were suddenly upon the door to Dr. Kiernan's lab. They stopped before it and Jonas knocked, but there came no reply. He knocked again; harder.

"Who is it?" A voice came from inside. Shuffling followed.

"Professor, it's me." Jonas replied from behind the heavy metal door, leaning his right shoulder against it.

"Jonas?" Dr. Kiernan perked up a bit.

"Yeah, Professor, open up." Jonas looked down at Rose, trying to figure out what the rush to see Dr. Kiernan was. She knew something. She had said so. A feeling. He could see it in her eyes that she didn't understand it herself. That only worried Jonas more. If she didn't understand what was happening to her, then how could any of them hope to?

"Professor?" He was about to knock again, but the doors to the lab opened and Dr. Kiernan stood there with a hand to his temple. He rubbed incessantly. Rose took notice once again.

"Is something wrong, Dr. Kiernan?" Rose asked, noticing his actions and narrowing her eyes at him. Dr. Kiernan met her gaze for a brief moment and then turned his back to them all. He walked further into his lab, hand never leaving his head.

"Ahh… it's Tomis; Tomis Leed. He's another one of the scientists on the naquadria project." Dr. Kiernan began to explain as Jack closed the door to the lab behind him. Dr. Kiernan turned and looked at them all.

"Yeah. What's wrong with him?" Jonas questioned as he fixed his jacket.

"He was transferred overnight. They cleaned out his office and they won't say where he went." Dr. Kiernan explained, concern filling his voice.

"Was he a member of the resistance?" Sam probed.

"I recruited him myself." Dr. Kiernan's gaze quickly befell onto Sam. "God, now I'm gonna get arrested."

"No. We don't know that." Jonas tried to calm him down.

"This is not the first time it's happened. About a month ago it was Dr. Silas. They said he was transferred as well and he hasn't been seen or heard from since." Dr. Kiernan turned away and began to pace. Rose watched him carefully with each step, noticing his hand reaching for his temple once more. "We were the three original members of the project. Now, I'm the only one left."

"All right. We're outta here." Jack declared and stuck a thumb back towards the door.

"You're leaving?" Dr. Kiernan spun around and stared incredulously at him.

"The negotiations are going nowhere, you're not helping us and quite frankly, your," Jack searched for the right word, " _organization_ is about to be exposed."

"Wait!" Dr. Kiernan shouted and moved towards Jack. "We're gonna make our move in two days, but we need your help."

"What are you proposing?" Teal'c asked, hands locked behind his back.

"We're in a position to take every major government building in this city except one." Dr. Kiernan pointed to the floor to indicate the one they were all standing in. "This one... This is their most heavily guarded facility."

"Because of the Stargate." Sam surmised and chanced a look back at Jack.

"That's right. But you people can come and go as you please." Dr. Kiernan began to wave his hands before him. "You could get a hundred armed men in here before anyone knew what happened. You could take the building from the inside and you wouldn't have to fire a shot!"

"Not. A. Chance." Jack all but spelled it out for him. They weren't going to help in a hostile takeover.

"Think about it." Dr. Kiernan looked back at Jack again. "If you want this coup to succeed, it has to be quick; it has to be as bloodless as possible. If we try to take the building ourselves, we'll get caught in a drawn-out firefight and the whole thing could dissolve into a civil war."

"Not my problem." Jack confirmed and then turned on his heels to leave.

"There's something else." Dr. Kiernan's words stopped him in his tacks. "Over the past three months, I've been smuggling small amounts of naquadria into the resistance. We've built up a considerable stockpile. If you help us, it's yours."

This got Jack's immediate attention.

"At least talk to them. I'll set up a meeting. Tonight." Dr. Kiernan all but begged them.

""Jack." She said his name and gave him a look. Her eyes turned to Jonas, resting on him for a brief moment before looking back at him. She wanted to help the man, help Jonas, but something about Dr. Kiernan didn't seem quite… right. Something was off and she couldn't name what, but she had felt it. She had seen it.

Jack placed his hands on his hips and sighed in a huff, clicking his teeth as he thought.

He turned to look at Dr. Kiernan and nodded in agreement.


	28. Coming to Terms

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose stood by the windows in the suite. She hand her right arm crossed over her chest, just below her breasts, and her left elbow resting on it. Her thumb sat against her lips with her nail trailing back and forth over the smooth flesh in thought. She stared out at nothing really. Vehicles whizzed by in the sky, people moved down below in the streets. However, her attention was elsewhere. She was thinking about the feeling she had gotten about Dr. Kiernan, about what seemed so off about him, about where she went when she became _entranced_.

Jack's hands rested awkwardly in the arm holes of his vest and were mushed against his chest. Sam was blabbing away about something or other, but he wasn't paying much attention anymore. His attention had gone from his team at the couch to Rose by the windows. Her back was to him; rigid and unmoving. He looked down the rest of his team again and then walked over to the large windows where Rose stood, lost in her own thoughts. He caught sight of her left arm moving as he approached, thanking whomever or whatever power there was for her not falling into one of her daydream trances again.

"Penny for your thoughts." Jack walked up next to her and looked out the window, making faces at the things he saw. Rose didn't look at him, but she thought about what he said. So many thoughts raced through her mind at once. Which one should she begin with?

"I'm just thinking about Dr. Kiernan." She admitted, ceasing her movements with her thumb. She crossed her left arm over her right and continued to look out the window.

"Odd-ball that one." Jack gave a huff of a laugh, gripping onto his vest's straps. Rose looked over at him and then took a quick glance behind her. The others sat on the couch in the step-down, talking away about what they were going to do. Jonas was adamant that they needed to help Kelowna still and she understood why. She looked back at Jack, who had seen her actions and leaned closer to her.

"Jonas hasn't seen it yet." She started and shook her head, looking to the floor. Her eyes went back to the youngest man on the team. He raised a hand to his mouth, turning from Sam and Teal'c with heated beliefs. He placed his hands, almost defiantly, on his hips and turned back to them with renewed vigor. "There's something just not right with him."

"Jonas? Well, I could have told you that…" Jack joked, earning a small smile from Rose.

"Dr. Kiernan," Rose began again, "Have you noticed that he is always rubbing his temples? As though plagued by something?"

"Well, Kelowna is facing war. He is aiding a resistance group bent on bringing down the government, helped create a naquadria bomb that nearly leveled the planet. Need I go on?" Jack looked back at her and saw her shaking her head. He instantly knew she hadn't been listening to him. She was trapped by her own thoughts. "You really think there's somethin' wrong with him. More than being a bit _funny_."

"Yes." Rose lifted her gaze to him again and licked her lips. "I cannot tell if he is suffering a nervous reaction or if it's something else entirely. He appears to be in pain, but why? What causes it? How long has it ailed him? And he talks to himself, have you noticed that?"

"Wait, what are you talking about?" Jack turned his body fully to face her. He was now completely lost. He hadn't noticed the good doctor talking to himself. He hadn't really concerned himself with why the doctor rubbed his head constantly. He wasn't as observant or compassionate as Rose apparently was.

"That _feeling_ I was talking about earlier," Rose had decided she would tell him; only him, "I don't know why. I don't know how, but it was related to Dr. Kiernan. I could **feel** that something was wrong with him. I could almost see him there in his lab, rubbing his temples while he muttered to someone and I swear Jack..."

She shook her head as she trailed off. She couldn't believe she was going to say it. She didn't believe quite herself.

"You swear what?" Jack didn't like where this was heading. Rose ran a hand through her hair, letting her hand fall from it haphazardly to her side.

"I swear he was talking to Jonas." She admitted hurriedly. Jack's face contorted and his eyes befell on Jonas, who was busy arguing with Sam and Teal'c. "I know what you're thinking."

"Apparently so." Jack's attention snapped back to her. "Are you trying to tell me your psychic or something? Because I could really do without that."

"I-I don't know Jack. But Jonas wasn't there with Dr. Kiernan." She licked her lips again, trying to keep herself calm. "D. Kiernan got no replies to his mutterings and Jonas was standing next to me the whole time."

Her eyes darted towards the others to make sure they had not heard her. The last thing she needed was to be bombarded with even more questions about something she didn't understand herself. None of them looked their way and continued to chat amongst themselves.

"I don't know what is happening to me," Rose shook her head at him and crossed her arms over her chest in a security habit, "but I'm changing, Jack."

"What do you **mean** you're changing?" Jack said a bit too loud and looked over at the others, seeing them chance a glance in their direction. They had ceased talking and all eyes were on them. Rose sighed and looked away, turning her back to them. She stared out the window again, shaking her head. Jack moved to block their view of Rose and sighed, noting to himself to keep his voice down. He ran a hand over his mouth and looked over her head out the window before resting his gaze on her once more.

"I feel it, Jack." Rose breathed out and placed a hand on the window. "Something is changing in me."

"Like when you go through a growth spurt?" Jack, confused and worried, tried to avoid through humor. Rose shook her head.

"Like Cassandra." Rose met his stare, fear filling her. That was a name Jack hadn't heard for a long time and hearing it almost made him panic. The girl with naquadria in her blood, able to detect Gou'ald, an experiment of Nirrti. "When I stared off today, I think… I think I was taken to Dr. Kiernan's lab. Seeing, in real time, what he was doing there."

"Rose, I think you've been under a lot of stress lately. You're not exactly having the easiest time. I'm sure all of this is just," Jack searched for the right word, "just a nervous break or something."

"No, it's not Jack. Something is happening to me, whether you want to believe it or not. I'm changing." Rose released the last of pent up energy into this conversation and turned away from him, looking out the window a moment before turning back. She spoke softly. "I don't know what I'm changing into, but I can feel it… and I think you can sense it. Jonas senses it, I'm sure."

Jack observed her and then he looked to Jonas. As if he had heard his name, Jonas' gaze moved to them. His eyes locked on Rose and never moved away until she looked back out the window. Jack moved his hands from his vest straps and sat them on his hips, clicking his tongue against his teeth in thought.

"What can we do?" Jack asked, but he already knew the answer. They both did.

"I'm not sure." She answered with apprehension and then took a breath, something seeming to click into place within her suddenly. She looked back up at Jack and gave a small smile. "But I'm not worried."

"Another feeling?" Jack's tone was sarcastic and filled with annoyance. She nodded her head though.

"I'm not worried." She confirmed again. Jack was about to say something more when a knock came from the door to the suite. Sam, Teal'c and Jonas all looked from the door to Jack and Rose and then back to the door again. Jack looked at them and then headed to answer it.

"I'm sorry to bother you." First Minister Valis stood at the door. He looked passed Jack and spotted Rose by the window, then saw Jonas by the couch. "I'm afraid I am the bearer of some… unfortunate news. May I come in?"

Jack stepped aside and allowed him in. Rose stayed where she was and watched as Valis moved to the couch with Jack behind him. His demeanor was wretched and his shoulders carried a heavy load with him.

Something hit Rose right between the eyes like a lightning bolt. She released a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding and a name fell out, "Dr. Kiernan…"

* * *

Rose peered down into the Embarkation Room back at Stargate Command. Her hands sat on the small lip, leaning herself forward so her forehead touched the pane and the breath from her nose fogged the glass. The others sat at the large, oval table. A heavy silence had encompassed them since Valis' news about Dr. Kiernan. Right now he laid in a bed within the Observation Room with a bandage around his head, suffering from a severe fracture to his left tibia and blunt trauma to the head. Valis said he had been found lying in a deserted street with no sign that there was a perpetrator.

Footsteps were heading their way. Rose pushed herself away from the window and looked to see General Hammond enter the Briefing Room. She moved to the table and took a seat between Jonas and Teal'c.

"What _exactly_ are the Kelownans saying?" General Hammond asked as he sat down.

"Not much." Jack shook his head.

"They claim to have no knowledge of how Dr. Kieran was injured." Sam explained and leaned forward closer to the table.

"And yet, he did fear that he was under threat from the government." Teal'c looked across the table at her.

"Yeah, but if they suspected that he was some kind of rebel spy, they would never have let us bring him back here." Sam argued, shaking her head at the idea and looking back at General Hammond.

"His own people may have tried to take him out if they felt he had been compromised." Jack looked between the two of them and then turned his attention to General Hammond.

"The question is, what do we do now? Do we go back to the table?" General Hammond asked as he stared at the far end of the table in thought.

"Sir…"

"General…"

Jack and Jonas looked to each other. Both had spoken at the same time, leaning on the table to make themselves more pronounced. Jack makes a gesture for Jonas to go first.

"With all due respect," Jonas began, "if we terminate negotiations now, we're going to be backing them into a corner. The way they see it, they'll have no other choice but to launch a preemptive first strike with the naquadria bomb."

"Jonas." Jack interjected. "We're gonna have to do it sooner or later. We can't give 'em what they want."

"Well, what about the resistance? If we can help the resistance seize power, we'll still get the naquadria, plus we'll be saving millions of lives." Jonas tried to find a way out, a way to help his people.

"Even if we wanted to, realistically, there's no way we could find them." Jack looked to General Hammond, his words having been for him.

"Actually sir, that's not exactly true." Sam looked to Jack. She had an idea.

"Major?" General Hammond wanted her to continue.

"Well, if Dr. Kieran really did smuggle naquadria to the resistance headquarters, I can track it." She enlightened them, going on about how she would do this.

"Alright then. Head back to Kelowna and track down this resistance: find them." General Hammond ordered them and stood from the table. They all followed suit. When General Hammond had left, Jack rounded on Rose.

" **You** , you're staying here with the good doctor." He ordered her, pointing a finger in her direction.

"Why?" Rose was completely confused.

"I want Dr. Frasier to take a look at you."

"Jack –"

"That's an order." Rose bit her tongue. There was no arguing with him. Rose didn't like it, but she would obey.

Jack, Sam, and Teal'c headed for the door. Jonas looked back at Rose behind him. He hadn't moved yet from his place at the table. She already knew what he was going to ask her.

"Don't worry, Jonas." She smiled up at him to assure him. "I'll watch over him till you get back."

"Thank you." Jonas breathed easy and then headed after the others. Rose headed to the Observation Room where both Dr. Kiernan and Dr. Frasier were. She went straight to the Observation Deck where Dr. Frasier stood by the window.

"Jack wants you to look me over again." Rose told Dr. Frasier and pulled a stool closer to the window to watch over Dr. Kiernan, who was fast asleep. A bandage was wrapped tightly around his head, protecting his wound.

"Rose there's no other tests I can run." Dr. Frasier looked to her with cheerless expression, clipboard in hand. "I'm sorry, but I've done every one that I can think of."

"Oh _I_ know that." Rose replied and looked to her with acceptance of this. "Tell Jack that. He just doesn't seem to want to believe it when it comes from me. He's in denial, I think."

She turned back to the window and watched Dr. Kieran. As if knowing someone was there, he woke up and looked around the Observation Room. He turned his head to the left and began to talk. Rose narrowed her eyes and was about to ask Dr. Frasier what was going, but then she remembered her trance earlier in the Kelownan Conference Center. Her eyes slowly went back to Dr. Kiernan, his lips moving fervently. He was talking to his invisible Jonas again most likely. Unless, of course, there were more figments his mind created.

General Hammond suddenly walked onto the Observation Deck. Dr. Frasier sat down at a terminal to go through several scans of Dr. Kiernan's head, looking for anything that seemed off.

"You have something, Doctor?" General Hammond asked and walked over to her. Rose turned on her stool and looked at the screen at the terminal. She didn't really understand technology like what Dr. Frasier and the others used. Even on Kelowna, there was so much that Rose didn't recognize, wouldn't know how to use; scanners, computers, vehicles. Jack had tried to teach her to drive his beaten up old truck many years ago. Never again. She preferred to walk.

"Yes, sir. These are Dr. Kieran's PET scans. It shows no sign of brain damage from the injury, but there is something else." Dr. Frasier's tone changed. "These images are consistent with someone suffering from advanced schizophrenia."

"Wait, what is schizophrenia?" Rose asked and looked between the General and Dr. Frasier. She looked to Rose, placing a clipboard in her lap and turning to face her. Both she and General Hammond sometimes forgot that Rose was not from an advanced society. In fact, most times they forgot she came from another society altogether. A lot of people on base did.

"Schizophrenia is a chronic and severe mental disorder that affects how a person thinks, feels, and behaves." Dr. Frasier began as Rose looked through the glass and down at Dr. Kiernan. "Someone with this disorder may have difficulty distinguishing between what is real and what is imaginary. They may be unresponsive or withdrawn and may have difficulty expressing normal emotions in social situations. Usually, these people seem to have lost touch with reality."

"Dr. Kieran's one of Kelowna's leading scientists." General Hammond couldn't believe it. "He's the head of their most top-secret program."

"I know, I can't explain it. The onset of this disease is extremely rare over the age of 35." Dr. Fraiser looked towards the window where Rose sat. Down below Dr. Kiernan chatted away mindlessly. Rose turned and looked at her, both stricken with concern and sadness.

"That would mean he's been functioning for at least 20 years without anyone noticing his condition." General Hammond commented and moved towards the window to see for himself.

"It's almost inconceivable." Dr. Frasier confirmed.

"What kind of symptoms are we talking about here?" General Hammond watched Dr. Kiernan as he spoke to his invisible guest. Rose looked up at General Hammond from the corner of her eyes, catching his dismay.

"Paranoia, delusions, possibly even full-blown hallucinations." Dr. Frasier shook her head and turned back to the terminal. "Disorganization with thinking and speech, extremely disorganized or abnormal motor behavior."

"That explains why he was always rubbing his temples…" Rose murmured to herself.

"Briefing Room. Now. The both of you." General Hammond ordered, exiting the room. The two women looked to each other and sighed, realizing how hard of a situation this was. In another moment they stood and went off in the direction of the General.

Rose and Dr. Frasier took a seat at the table, awaiting the arrival of SG-1. Rose tapped her nails against the clear coat on the wood, getting a rhythm going and she anxiously waited. Dr. Frasier went through the folder on Dr. Kiernan, flipping through page after page after page and finally closing it when she decided there was nothing more she could learn from it. General Hammond stood by the window looking into the Embarkation Room, hands behind his back.

It was nearly an hour before SG-1 returned from Kelowna. They were herded into the Briefing Room and sat down at the table with Rose and Dr. Frasier. Jonas looked so heartbreakingly miserable. Rose questioned what had happened to make him so. What had happened? What had been said?

Jack and Sam took their usual seats, but Jonas sat beside Sam and Teal'c was left to sit down next to Rose. She didn't mind that Teal'c had taken the seat to her right, but she found herself wishing that Jonas had taken that seat instead. As she looked to him across the table she noticed that he seemed so far away…

No one said anything. Not at first.

"Dr. Frasier," General Hammond began and sat down in his normal place at the head of the table. He laced his hands together on top of the table, "why don't you explain what you've found about Dr. Kiernan's condition."

"As near as I can tell, Dr. Kiernan has a unique form of brain damage resulting from long-term exposure to naquadria radiation." She explained, breaking the silence. Rose caught Jonas flinch from the corner of her eyes and looked to him. His expression had changed to anger, perhaps even bitterness. He was entitled, she thought.

"I went over the specs from the Kelownan bomb project. It looks like they never had proper shielding." Sam looked around the table with a grim expression.

"Is Jonas at risk?" General Hammond asked suddenly. Rose's attention snapped back General Hammond. She hadn't thought about this. Was he at risk? Was damage already done? Jonas's head was down, but his eyes lifted to find hers.

"No. I've already tested him. He's negative." Dr. Frasier replied and tapped the pads of her fingers gently on the folder sitting before her. "My guess is, he didn't have enough exposure."

"The Pentagon is eager to resume our own research on the naquadria you found in the warehouse." General Hammond's words were directed at Sam.

"That shouldn't be a problem, sir." Sam confirmed. "I mean we are double-checking, but I think that our existing safeguards are sufficient. I sent a message to the Kelownans detailing the risk and offering our help to upgrade their facilities."

Sam looked around at them all.

"Unfortunately, I haven't gotten any response."

"In fact, we've heard nothing from the Kelownans since Colonel O'Neill and Jonas returned." General Hammond's words brought worry.

"They may well be at war by now." Teal'c said what they all were thinking.

"What about Dr. Kieran?" Jonas didn't care so much about the delegation or negotiations or any of that. His friend was lying in a bed with severe trauma and permanent damage because of _them_.

"With proper medication, we can keep his condition from deteriorating. Unfortunately, there's no way to reverse the damage that's already been done." Dr. Frasier looked to him with apology. He didn't meet her gaze.

"Can I see him?" Jonas asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"Of course Jonas." Dr. Frasier tried to smile, but it came out dejected. Jonas stood from the table and headed for the door. Rose watched him go, no longer listening to what was being said at the table.

"Jonas confronted Valis about the other two scientists; Leed and Silas. They were taken to a government mental facility on the down low so no one would know the risks of working on the project." Jack's words registered in Rose's mind, but she didn't say anything.

"They knew?" Dr. Frasier asked incredulously. She, nor any of them, could believe that the Kelownan government knew about the severe side effects and allow the scientist to continue their work.

"Valis said they had _suspected_. He also said the research was just too important to let the other scientists know the risks involved." Jack answered, looking from General Hammond to Dr. Frasier. Rose closed her eyes and gritted her teeth. She had spent the last several years as an Elder, fighting for her people; all of her people. No matter the risks, no matter the downfalls or reaction: she had always given her people the truth, to decide for themselves. That was one thing that separated her from the other Elders. One thing that made her different.

* * *

Jonas walked into the Observation Room and stood next to Dr. Kiernan's bed. A nurse stood on the other side taking Dr. Kieran's pulse. Rose had followed Jonas not long after he had left, excusing herself from the table with nothing more than a 'sorry.' She stood outside the door to the Observation Room and peered around the corner at Jonas and Dr. Kiernan.

"Jonas." Dr. Kiernan greeted with a smile. Jonas nodded at him and tried to smile back. He looked him over from head to foot, his body almost shaking as he released a heavy sigh. "Jonas, I hear I'm being moved today."

"Yeah. We're uh," Jonas faltered slightly as he dragged a stool closer to Dr. Kiernan's bedside and sat down, "going to take you to a facility that's better equipped to deal with your needs."

Rose could hear in his voice how hard this was for him. The nurse dropped Dr. Kiernan's wrist and walked around the back of the bed, nodding at Rose as she went by her and down the hall.

Kiernan leaned closer to Jonas, "I understand everything is in place for the coup."

"Really?" Jonas asked, trying to play along with his friend's imagination. Rose's heart sank. She could hear the dejected tone in Jonas' voice, see the way his shoulders slumped.

"They're keeping me informed." Dr. Kiernan explained and looked up at the Observation Deck. Rose followed his gaze, but saw nothing. When she looked back, Dr. Kiernan gave a short nod to whomever he saw behind the glass. "After they take power, Jonas, the resistance is going to dismantle the bomb and shut down the naquadria project forever."

"That's good, Professor." Jonas smiled sadly at him and nods his head. Rose heard it; the falter before the break. "They couldn't have done it without you."

"Do you really think so?" Dr. Kiernan sounded so happy to hear that.

"I know so." Jonas again attempted a smile at him. "You saved the world."

Rose's heart broke not only for Dr. Kiernan, but for Jonas. She heard the stool screech as Jonas pushed back from Dr. Kiernan's bed. Rose stepped back from the doorway and into the hall, pressing her back against the cold steel wall. She heard footsteps and lifted her head, trying to decide whether to flee or stay. Would he want her here? Would he want to know she had heard them? Heard him?

Before she could react, she came face to face with Jonas. She opened her mouth to say something, anything, but couldn't find the words. Instead, she reached out a hand to his arm. She looked at her hand on his arm and rubbed over it through his jacket, closing her mouth up tight. She looked up at him and met his gaze once more. She ceased her ministrations and Jonas moved passed her, heading for the elevator.

She didn't know why, but as she turned and watched him walk away, she knew that he meant for her to follow. So she did. She followed behind him down the hall and to the elevator, stepping inside. The door closed and Rose pressed the button, sending the elevator to the floor his office resided on.

"Valis knew." Jonas voice was so soft that Rose had almost believed she hadn't heard anything. She looked to where he stood in the corner, back to the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. He seethed, but his eyes held sorrow. She could see tears welling, stinging his eyes and making them red. "He and the others… Dreylock, Hale… they all knew the side effects to long term naquadria exposure. Even after seeing what it had done to Dr. Silas and Dr. Leed, they still let him–"

Jonas fell off and shook his head, glaring at the ground. Rose said nothing and only watched him with a heavy heart. His eyes jerked from the floor to the wall to the ceiling, tears threatening to fall.

"He was a good man. A brilliant scientist and now…"

"He still is." Rose was surprised by the sound of her own voice and how quick she had reacted. Jonas looked over at her and she could see his jaw tense. "Jonas, he's still the same man. The same man who mentored you, who worked alongside you, who was and still is your friend. He still cares about you. None of that has changed."

Jonas nodded his head, seeming to consider her words for a moment and tried to smile at her; tried to make her believe that he was okay or that he would be. She didn't buy into it though and she certainly didn't smile back. He didn't need falsities. He didn't want them.

"He's **changed** , Jonas." Rose spoke up again and met his stare without fear. "Not _dead.._."

The elevator dinged and the door opened. Jonas looked out into the hall and then back at Rose, quickly. He shook his head and then strode out of the elevator, leaving Rose inside. She again watched him go, but this time she didn't follow. She had said all she could say and now he needed space. He needed to come to terms.

She stayed there in the elevator and watched as he turned a corner, blinking out of sight. She sighed and silently wished there was something more that she could do. She looked to the panel of buttons. Hitting 25, she decided to head back to senior staff quarters and her room.

She needed space herself. It was time to come to terms with her own demons.


	29. Bad Omens

I hope that those of you who are reading this story are enjoying it! Feel free to message me or review if you have questions or comments or even if you want to ask me to incorporate something. Thanks all!

* * *

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

 **"** _ **He's changed Jonas… not dead."**_

Those words had haunted Rose for weeks since she had spoken them to Jonas. She had not realized at first, but they had greater meaning than what she had intended. Three weeks had gone by since Dr. Kiernan had been transferred to a more suitable facility. Rose had offered to go with Jonas to take Dr. Kiernan and ensure that he was comfortable, but he had wanted to do it on his own. She respected that.

She too needed distance. Everyone had been keeping to themselves. She had hardly seen anyone until their mission to P5X-112. They were to meet with a Tok'ra named Khonsu, posing as a Gou'ald lord. He was to give them needed information of the system lord, Anubis. However, things didn't go to plan and Khonsu ended up dead. The information was lost along with him. Their second mission had been separate. Jack, Sam and Teal'c had gone to Alpha Base while Jonas had gone with SG-2 to P36-231 to uncover artifacts. Rose had been given the opportunity to go with Jonas, but she had turned it down and instead had tagged along with SG-7 to Callandra on a routine check-up.

She had needed time to come to terms with what was happening to her. She didn't need the added stress of the others watching her, worrying about her, asking her questions she didn't know the answers to. She still didn't quite understand what was happening to her and she doubted she ever truly would despite slowly accepting everything. She accepted that she was changing, either for the better or for worse. She accepted that she may never get her answers, never return home, and never know what happened to her people. She accepted that this _change_ might just be her end.

She had tried to force herself into trances just to see if she could. She quickly found it didn't work that way. These _feelings_ and _trances_ that followed had no rhyme nor reason it seemed. It had a will of their own and came sporadically. She gave up on trying to force herself into trances after a week of trying. Forcing them seemed to have made them the transition speed up or just simply made it worse. She wasn't sure which the more appropriate answer was. It seemed that the harder she tried to understand, to uncover, the worse she got and the further away her answers became. She, yet again, would have to wait for things to take their course; what ever course.

Rose sat before her altar and chanted softly the words Gaenor had taught her. Her mind began to wander back to herself and how she was changing; rapidly. She could feel it in her bones, in her blood. Something moved within her, some kind of force pumping throughout her body. She could even see it occasionally when she stared too long in the mirror. Especially in her eyes.

She could sense it sometimes at night as she slept. It caused her dreams of the cave to disappear and in its stead was a tree; tall, strong, ancient. She had recognized it immediately as a lamenting tree. They were sacred to her people at one point, but most had been burned after the death of Lucretia. Some, the Elders, had seen it as a source for _her_ power; Lucretia. The one Rose saw at night in her dreams was old and resilient throughout the ages. It stood tall and resolute on a hill top where it overlooked a village out in the distance, nestled at the base of a mountain. Its long tendrils of fluffy pink leaves hung to the ground like a canopy, sheltering its trunk from prying eyes. The sun was always seeming to set ahead of it and she always walked upon it slowly. She would stare down at the village as the sun disappeared and the moon rose behind her in its stead. She would turn, stare up at it and then watch the tree again. She was always waiting for something to happen; something she seemed to know would happen.

She was never afraid. Instead she was full of anticipation, of familiarity, of hope. All her answers were then answered in a single moment. She knew what was happening to her. She knew her path. She finally understood it all…

Then she would awaken at with jolt of a pain coursing through her, beginning in her head and spreading like wildfire over her body. Sweating and breathing heavily, she would sit up swearing that the room was ablaze. Her eyes would find the open closet door and she would see herself staring back. Only something was different in those twilight hours. Her eyes sparkled almost like pools beneath moonlight. They glittered and danced with memories of what she had learned and then she would blink and it would be gone. The answers along with it and her memory wiped clean.

 _Somehow you are able to interact with it all on another plane._

Daniel's words. Not her own. They were correct though. She could somehow interact with it all; the universe or, more so, something on Luxima. She suspected it was the Life-Blood of the planet, the force the Mysticus' used as their power source so long ago. Gaenor had told her about it, about its power, about its workings to keep the beings of Luxima connected in some strange cycle and somehow she able to interact with it. For whatever reason, the Life-Blood had chosen her to commune with. Always at night though when she was fast asleep, away from prying ears, when nothing else could touch her. It pulled her away to that place on the hill where the tree sat waiting for her to show her the secrets of Luxima.

But why couldn't she remember? Perhaps… was something interfering? Some **one**?

Rose opened her eyes and looked at the altar before her. Some of the puzzle pieces clicked into place in her head. What she felt in her bones and what she felt in her blood were separate. A change in her physical self and another in her spiritual being. The Life-Blood reached out to her spirit because of the change she felt in her blood as something else pulled her away at the change in her physical self. Her _trances_ were not normal and they were not the Life-Blood's doing. It was something else entirely. Something darker that was trying to draw her away from reality. It showed her pain and anguish. Sometimes it was people she knew, like Dr. Kiernan, other times it was unfamiliar faces in distress; people on Earth, people in Luxima, people in faraway places undiscovered.

These _trances_ frightened her. It was becoming more than just seeing these people. She saw what they saw, heard what they heard, **felt** what they felt… it was too much at times and they were becoming more frequent. She wasn't trapped in the trances and instead it seemed she was trapped in the pain, the suffering. It was eating at her. It had started when she had tried to force herself into a trance. She was the cause of it.

A knock came from the door. Rose's attention rounded on it. She waited a moment and another knock came a bit louder. She stood from her kneeling position before the altar and headed for the door. She opened it and found Teal'c standing there, hands clasped behind his back. He gave a small bow of his head and she stepped back from the door, allowing him entrance.

"Are you alright today, Rosalina Levana?" Teal'c looked to the altar and spotted two picture frames; one held the blue stargazer lily that was pressed and preserved forever, the other was a group shot of SG-1 before Rose had returned to Luxima. He acknowledged them both and then looked to her.

"I'm fine Teal'c." She replied and shut the door.

"Did you dream last night?"

"No." She replied and moved to the table. She sat down in one of the chairs and chewed on her bottom lip. Teal'c had found her one day over a week ago. He had been meditating and seen her in distress, withering in anguish in her bed. She hadn't told him anything about what was going on though she suspected that Jack had. She didn't understand why he kept coming back, day after day, asking if she remembered anything from her dreams. She never told him about her dreams, about her feelings, about the pain.

"Teal'c, why do you keep coming back?" She asked finally and looked up at him. He arched an eyebrow at her in confusion. "I have told you nothing and yet you seem to know everything about what is happening to me."

"Kel'no'reem." Teal'c replied to quickly and Rose shook her head at him. She knew that wasn't it. His meditation was a form of sleep, to collect his thoughts. It didn't make him psychic.

"Teal'c." She took a deep breath and shook her head at him again. "Was it Jack?"

Teal'c said nothing. Slowly he bowed his head in response and Rose sat back in her chair, rubbing her forehead.

"What did he tell you?" She lifted her gaze, trying not to lose her patience.

"He explained that you were experiencing a change of some kind and that Dr. Frasier could not explain it medically." Teal'c began, his eyes never leaving her. "O'Neil also said that you had felt something wrong with Dr. Kiernan, even saw him in one of your trances, which seem to come without warning."

"So why are you here?" Rose looked over at him, finding that she was becoming a bit testy. She was usually very good at keeping herself calm and collected. Her patience, tolerance, and stamina were dwindling day after day the more these trances came to plague her.

"To help you control these trances." Teal'c moved to the altar and stared down at it. He examined the candles that were burnt almost to nothing, the pictures, the statue, the herbs that smoldered in a small decorative plate. "Though it would seem you have been attempting to control them yourself."

"And failing miserably." Rose's voice cracked and she quickly looked away. She stared out at the wall across the room and ran her thumb over her bottom lip. "They're getting worse, Teal'c."

He looked back at her carefully. She stared off as though in thought, thumb dragging gently over her lips.

"I don't think I can control them." She looked over at him and dropped her hand to the table top. "It's as though…"

She fell silent. He waited another moment before encouraging her.

"As though what, Rosalina?" Teal'c's words caused her to look at him again. He never used just her first name. Not in all the years she had known him. He was being serious and caring. He was here for her; not for Jack. If she had gone to Teal'c, he would have willingly sat and listened to her. He was good at that. She appreciated that about him. She forgot at times that she still had people here who she had history with, whom she could call friends.

"May I ask you something _personal_?" She began, scratching her nails over the table top gently. Teal'c arched an eyebrow again, but then nodded once. "Your symbiote…"

Rose nodded her head at him, indicating the pouch in his abdomen that housed the young Gou'ald. Teal'c's gaze followed to his abdomen briefly and then rested on her once more.

"Do you ever feel like it's controlling you?"

Teal'c's eyebrows knitted together and he took a long moment to think about her question to give her the most honest answer he could.

"No." He shook his head and waited for her to speak again, to help him understand where she was going with this.

"These _trances_ as we call them," she began and pushed herself to the edge of her seat, sitting straight, "it feels like they are controlling me like a virus taking over. I feel like I'm losing control of myself."

"Like a Gou'ald taking over a host." Teal'c clarified and finally understood. Rose nodded her head and waited for him to say something; anything. Tell her she was crazy, that it was all simply in her head and that with practice she would be able to control it. He did no such thing. He was unsure what he could say.

"I lied earlier." She admitted finally and turned her gaze away from him. "I did dream last night. I dream every night."

Teal'c moved closer and sat down at the table across from her. He knew she had lied. He always knew somehow. Rose looked off, far in her thoughts.

"For a while it was escaping the Phantom in the Forest, then the Necromancer, then the cave and never being able to enter it. But now," she licked her lips, "now I sleep and I dream, but I wake up without memory and a sharp pain that starts in my head as though someone is driving a nail into it. Here."

She pointed to the center of her forehead where the pain usually arose.

"And then it spreads like a fire, threatening to consume me." She shuddered slightly at the memory of the feeling. "I can feel that I dream of something important. It's something that I need to remember, but when I try to it is nothing more than a fog of colors and smells and strange feelings of comfort. I'm supposed to remember, Teal'c. I know I am, but something is locking me out of my own memory of it." She looked to Teal'c meeting his firm gaze. He was thinking about what she had said, trying to work through it before giving her and answer. "Do you think my memory is damaged somehow from whomever wiped it when I was a child?"

"I am not sure." Teal'c replied honestly. Rose hadn't really been looking for an answer, but she was glad that he was as confused as her. "You and your people work off of intuition. Does this feel different from your childhood?"

Rose thought for a long moment, looking away and trying to remember how she felt with both at different times.

"It feels different." She finally replied. "The memories from my childhood are gone completely; erased. My dream is just… blocked. It's like staring at a door, knowing there it something behind it, but it's locked. Trying to keep me out from what feels like the truth." Rose looked over at the altar and to the picture of SG-1. She found herself missing Daniel, his comforting words, his quirky responses and behaviors. Just his presence. Then she found herself missing Jonas, who reminded her so much of her friend and yet he was so different. He was so optimistic, so generous with the amount of input he gave, and an eagerness that surpassed and often annoyed the others. But not her. He was refreshing. He was different from her people as she was. He was always trying to prove his worth, always taking an opportunity to prove that he could make a difference. She loved it. She loved–

"Perhaps something **is** keeping your from the truth." Teal'c's words caused her to look back at him in interest. "Or perhaps some _one_."

"Who?"

"Would the Necromancer have the ability to do this?"

Rose blinked and then she blinked again. She had never thought about it. She had almost forgotten the Necromancer and the day she was thrown through the Stargate to Earth. So many other things had happened. There were other things she had been concerned with. The Necromancer had drifted to the back of her mind… perhaps where they wanted to be all along.

"Yes, I assume they would." Rose confirmed and both of them locked eyes. "But I cannot get the Stargate to dial Luxima to confront them. I don't even know what is happening on Luxima. The planet could be gone for all I know."

They hit yet another wall.

"What reason would the Necromancer have to keep your dreams from you?" Teal'c thought aloud, but did not expect a reply.

"There is obviously something they don't want me to know. There is something that the Life-Blood is trying to tell me in the dream that they oppose." Rose clicked her teeth and sighed. Teal'c didn't question the Life-Blood. Rose had explained it to him many years ago as a force that flowed through all Luximans that returned to the planet when they perished; a never ending cycle.

"You are closed off from Luxima and yet the Life-Blood is stretching across the universe to reach out to you. Just you, Rosalina Levana." Teal'c was slightly amazed. Rose lifted her head and stared at him for a long moment.

"As I change, I feel myself being torn apart; pulled in opposite directions." She admitted as unease spread across her face. "I feel as though there are two battles waging within me. These trances belong to some other force that I have not discovered yet. But the other battle, the other change, the one I feel in my blood… it is of opposing forces; dark and light. It feels as though the closer they come together, the more volatile I become and with these trances on top of it all…"

"You fear you are helpless. That you must wait and see who the victor shall be before you can get any answers." Teal'c surmised but Rose was quick to shake her head in disagreement.

"No, I fear that I will be the deciding factor. That these forces are battling for me." She met his stare. "Even more so, I fear that these trances are inadvertently leading me down the darker path."

The room fell silent. Both of them knew not what to say.

"The closer you get to the light, the greater your shadow becomes. This does not mean that you will succumb to it." Teal'c spoke gently as though it had been meant for himself. Rose gave a small smile, knowing who he had heard that from.

"I miss him." Rose admitted and looked to the picture of SG-1 once more on the altar. She found Daniel, messy hair and thick rimmed glasses. Egg-head, as Jack called him so many times. Teal'c followed her gaze to the picture and he bowed his head in respect to Daniel's memory.

"I miss him as well." Teal'c and Rose smiled sadly at one another. "Do you think he found peace?"

Rose smiled and nodded her head.

"I think he found more than he expected to with Oma and the other Ascended Beings. He's in a better place. Far from all this." Rose confirmed and nodded her head at him again. She hoped Daniel had found all those things anyways. She also hoped that Gaenor was with him wherever he was. Their disappearance from her life had left a hole that could not be filled. Daniel was a good friend and Gaenor had been like a mother, a sister. Two people who had guided her, cared for her, protected her were gone when she needed them most.

 _…remember that you're not alone…_

Daniel's written words hit her hard and she found her eyes stinging with tears. Her face contorted as she tried to hold back her sadness, her despair. She felt alone. She had people who cared, but they couldn't help her. They couldn't save her or guide her in the right direction. She couldn't even do that herself. There was no one, perhaps anywhere, who could understand what she was going through.

The image of Daniel faded away from her mind and was replaced by Jonas. She could see him in his office, happy-go-lucky smile plastered on his face with a book in hand. His right hand twirled a pen meticulously and then nearly dropped it. He tried to recover it in midflight, but slipped out of the chair. He scrambled to his feet at the sound of laughter as she stood at the door watching him. He was embarrassed and placed a hand behind his head, eventually laughing at himself with her.

Slowly, the image changed and Rose was drawn away gently into a trance. This one was different. She wasn't thinking about what ailed her or whether she would ever get home, but instead she had focused in on a happy memory and yet she was still pulled into a trance. One that felt cold and dark.

Teal'c watched as her eyes grew heavy. Her expression went blank as she became unnervingly still in her seat. He could hardly see her chest moving as she breathed.

 _A dark stone-walled hall with torches every so often, poorly lighting the way. Large wooden double doors laid at the end where the smell of burning incense and stale water floated from beneath it. Muffled voices. Then shouting. Then screaming. Then dead silence._

 _The torches flickered as the doors opened and Rose ran out. Someone yelled after her, but she didn't look back. Her footfalls echoed after her. She stormed down another poorly lit hallway and walked into a room, shutting the heavy dark wooded door behind her. She paced the floors; back and forth, back and forth._

The cold stone walls, the room, the scents, everything was unfamiliar to her as she watched herself in the trance. She was dressed in odd clothing; a white dress with sleeves that billowed out from the elbow on, slits at the shoulders to expose the skin, the bottom rising just a hair above her knees. Sapphire stitching assured her this dress belonged to her, despite lack of recognition. She wore sandals made of silvered leather that wrapped up her legs to below her knees and were tied off in a bow. Her hair was piled up on her head with flowers adorning strands of small braids.

 _Rose paced back and forth, back and forth, about the room as she rubbed the palm of her left hand in a nervous action. Tears were welling up in her eyes and threatened to be her undoing. She fought against them and placed a hand to her abdomen, right below her chest. She tried to steady her breathing. She was falling into a panic._

 _A knock came from the heavy door and Rose raced to answer it. Pulling it open, she came face to face with Jonas. They stared at each other from opposite sides. The tears spilled over and soon Rose was crying silently, tears falling from her chin to the floor. Jonas looked surprised, concerned, confused. His eyebrows knitted together as he watched her crumble before him._

 _"What happened?" He asked._

His voice was a bit muffled to her like someone talking through a cloth.

 _She said nothing._

 _"Rose, what did they say?" Jonas tried again, earnestly wishing to know what had happened. "What did they tell you? What's going to happen?"_

Rose narrowed her eyes at the two before her in the trance. Who said what? Where was this dark, cold room? What was going on? She continued to watch the image before her mind's eye. She could feel her sorrow in the moment she was being shown. She could feel Jonas' as well. Something was wrong. Horribly, irrevocably wrong.

 _Her heart broke and along with it the remainder of her composure. She released a choked sob and fell to the hard floor on her knees. She felt the stone scrape the skin, surely blood following, but she didn't care. She wrapped her arms around herself and cried, eyes shut tight. Jonas didn't even think and fell before her. He swept her into his arms and held on firmly, pulling her tightly to his chest._

 _She said something._

Rose couldn't hear what had been said. It was muffled beyond recognition.

 _She cried harder, face turning red. Jonas pulled back and placed a hand to her cheek, forcing her to look at him. His eyes were wide, searching her eyes frantically for affirmation of what she had just told him._

Whatever it was she had said to him, Rose could plainly see that it wasn't good. Jonas looked so fearful staring at her in the trance. It was as though someone had told him someone close had just died.

 _He found what he had been searching for. She was telling him the truth and it terrified him. His hand moved to the back of her neck, grasping and ungrasping gently in a nervous comforting action._

 _"We will figure this out: together. I promise you, Rose." His words were rushed and his tone uneven. His thoughts were going a mile a minute. "You don't have to do this alone. I'm not gonna leave you."_

 _She again said something that was so horribly muffled. She looked to him then with red eyes and a tear stained face contorted in sorrow. He placed a kiss on her forehead and held her there, safe in his arms where no one could touch her. He closed his eyes and breathed into her hair._

 _"I won't let them hurt you."_

Rose snapped back to reality. She felt as though she had been hit in the chest by a ton of bricks. She blinked several times and then realized someone was calling her name.

"Rosalina? Rosalina Levana?" Teal'c's voice brought her attention to him slowly as her mind established that he was talking to her. "You were not moving. Did you go into a trance?"

"I did." She breathed out in a soft whisper and then lifted a hand to her face. She touched her cheek, feeling tears.

"What did you see?" Teal'c questioned with a steady eye. He could see her distress, feel the tension.

"I'm not sure, Teal'c." She answered honestly and looked to him again. "But it wasn't good. I think…"

She was afraid to say it. If she said it, then it would make it true. It would be real.

"What was it?"

"Teal'c," she began again, "I think I saw the future."

Teal'c raised an eyebrow at her in both curiosity and alarm. She swallowed the lump in her throat hard and met his gaze. She was shaking, hands unsteady on the table top. She had no idea what she and Jonas were talking about in the trance, but the feeling she got was awful. It was intimidating, heartbreaking, filled with a sense of total defeat.

"Teal'c?" She asked. "Do you believe in destiny?"

Rose couldn't be sure, but it had felt as though the Life-Blood had reached out to her with this trance. Had used this opportunity to convey a message to her; a warning. But like the dreams, it was incomplete and left her questioning.

"I think we make our own destiny." He replied evenly. Rose nodded her head at him, but she felt differently. She didn't have control and things were getting progressively worse. The Life-Blood was reaching out beyond her dreams now, relinquishing to use these trances as a carrier. It was effective and she remembered at least. She was being taken to darker places and the shadows were closing in on her.

She sat back in her seat and looked over at the altar. The candles had burned out, herbs ceased to smolder, ash from the herbs covering someone in the picture of SG-1; Rose. Her face was blacked out by ash. Gaenor would have called it an omen signifying that something was about to happen to her.

Bad omens: something was coming for her.


	30. Gone

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Rose looked back at the altar and bowed her head. She whispered softly and then raised her head again. She raised her left hand, fingertips gently touching her forehead and then she outstretched it to the altar in offering. She stood, blew out the candle, ground the smoldering herbs, and stretched. Her body ached and groaned as she moved.

She was back to nightmares ever since she has sat with Teal'c and the Life-Blood had reached out to her waking mind. She had thought of nothing but what she had seen since and she had actively avoided everyone, especially Jonas. He had come and found her a day after she had her vision. She hadn't answered her door. She stood by it, listening until she heard his footsteps retreat down the hall. She was keeping to herself, separating herself from them because she didn't know what to expect next.

She was feeling unstable.

Trances, visions, nightmares, the Life-Blood, the necromancer, the Stargate… she had talked herself into facing one thing at a time. It was all she could do and she was failing. She wasn't like the others, wasn't like her parents. She was… useless, hopeless, unworthy. So she kept herself hidden away. She knew she wasn't smart like Daniel or Sam or Jonas. She had no real understanding of biology or technology. Hell, she still jumped when a door opened automatically. When she had fist come to the SGC, Daniel had been adamant of comparing her people to the archaic Tau'ri of Rome, Greece and Celts. Jack simply called them _primitive_ , which she didn't take kindly too. The only things she was good at were fighting and diplomacy. The things she had been raised around, things that were familiar, things that her mother had been good at.

She looked to the altar again. She thought on her nightmares, reverting back to the cave. She was able to enter it these last few times, but she never seemed to get anywhere. The sky outside turned dark, purple lightning flashed overhead, thunder clapped, but inside the cave was nothing but darkness. She walked and walked and walked. Whispers, screams, the smell of urine, of something burning, a glow at the end, but she could never reach it. It was right there, lurking before her, but she just couldn't get to it. She knew that once she did, everything would become clear. She wasn't quite sure what had caused the shift in her dreams. Was it the interference by the Life-Blood? Was it her physical change? She didn't question it though. Not now anyway.

Rose ran her hands through her hairs, pulling her fingers through the knots. She walked to the bedside table and opened one of the two drawers, pulling out two clear hair ties. She sat on her bed and began to, as Sam had explained it was called on Earth, French braid her hair into two tails and tied them off at the ends. She gave each of them a small tug and then stood up, preparing herself to get ready for the day.

A knock came from the door. Rose's attention snapped to face the door and she waited there by her bed. She said nothing. She could see the shadows of feet at the small break between the door and the floor. Another knock.

"Rose?" It was Jonas again. What did he want? Why couldn't he leave her alone? "I just wanted to see if you were alright. Everyone is getting a little worried."

She said nothing, but she averted her gaze to the floor.

"Why won't you come out? Teal'c said–"

Rose shook her head and closed her eyes. Of course. Teal'c had said something to Jack and now probably the whole base knew.

"–that you went into another trance the other day. That it was pretty bad: you came out of it crying. He also said you were…" He fell off. He didn't quite know how to phrase it without offending her. Jonas leaned his forehead against the door, closing his eyes. "He said he could see fear in your eyes. We're all worried about you. Rose?"

He tried the doorknob, but Rose had gotten smart. She had locked it days ago. She could hear him sigh heavily, dejectedly. Then she heard his voice, ever so softly, "Just let me know you're okay in there…"

His tone pulled at something within her. She gazed at the door and made to move to it, but stopped herself. Her hand hovered over the doorknob, heat radiating from her palm. It shook. She pulled it back and held it to her chest protectively. She heard Jonas' hand slip from the doorknob and brush his clothes. Rose closed her eyes tightly and tried to will her hand to cease shaking.

"I'm not alright…" She whispered back, so softly so he wouldn't hear. Slowly Jonas retreated down the hall as he had done for the last few days. Rose took a moment to compose herself and then quickly readied, pushing everything else to the back of her mind. Today she was traveling off world, but not with SG-1. Instead she was tagging along with SG-7 to Callandra. It was a simple enough mission: ensure the planet was stable. SG-1 was already off base at the Alpha site; a contingency base in the case of an overwhelming Goa'uld attack on Earth. Jonas wasn't with them either. He was tagging along with SG-1 today. It seemed as though everyone needed a break.

Rose stared at her two uniforms; SG uniform and Gunda. She didn't know why it was so hard to choose. She didn't understand why she placed so much meaning in which outfit she wore. Her hands graced the fabric of her Upper Gunda uniform. It was familiar, projected strength among her people, and showed her confidence. Her eyes turned to the SG uniform that was also familiar, but it sat loosely on her, awkwardly, weakly. Her hand gripped the Gunda uniform tightly and pulled it on, pulling her brown buckle boots on last.

She stared at herself in the mirror and fixed her black peasant top, rearranging her blue satin faux corset so it sat correctly across her abdomen. She ran her hands over the row of buttons at either hip of her black campaigner leggings, counting them as she touched them; one, two, three, four. She looked at her hair. It wasn't the _official_ or _approved_ head dressings of an Upper Gunda.

"No one here to tattle to the Elders." She murmured to herself and turned from the mirror. She headed to the door and halted. A chill ran down her spine and she stepped back, looking at the knob. She released a breath she held and licked her lips. Something didn't feel quite right. She felt a small tug on her, pulling her away from the door. She took a moment, trying to figure it out, waiting for a trance or a vision, but nothing came. So, she took the doorknob and opened the door, ignoring the feelings of warning.

She headed down the hall and to the elevator. She had looked over her shoulder the entire way, feeling as though something was watching her, following her every step. It didn't appear to be dark or sinister, but there was definitely _something_ there. Yet, she could never spot it or tell right where it was. She stepped into the elevator with two others and rode it to the Embarkation Room floor.

SG-7 was already in the Embarkation Room when she arrived. She looked around at them and sighed. It was strange not being with Jack and SG-1, but it was necessary. Both she and Jonas had opted for routine maintenance missions till they felt they were ready to return. Rose had also managed to ensure that she and Jonas were separated from each other, traveling with different SG teams. She was on seven and Jonas on two. She needed as few distractions as possible. No Jack or Sam or Teal'c or Jonas. She needed to be away from them. She knew something was coming, something bad. She had even told Teal'c. So she needed to be as far away from the people she cared about lest something bad happened to them instead.

 _Don't go…_

Rose turned her head to the right slightly as though listening to something far away from her. A whisper on the wind so soft that only she could hear. The door to the room open and SG-2 entered with Jonas at the back. Rose shook off the feeling she had in the pit of her stomach and looked to Jonas, hoping he wouldn't meet her gaze. But he did so with a small smile. It made all her worries disappear and grow all at the same time. She wanted nothing more than to talk to him, tell him everything that was going on, be comforted by him like he had done in the past; a hand on hers, a look, soft words, a hug…

She looked away, telling herself she couldn't allow that. Not anymore.

Jonas walked over to her dressed in full gear, including hat and full pack. Rose caught herself finding him somewhat _adorable_ in his dress and kicked the thought from her mind immediately before it could take hold. The harder she tried to separate herself, the closer she became. Especially with Jonas. They hadn't spoken since Dr. Kiernan, which was nearly a month ago. It was strange, she admitted to herself, not hanging around his office each and every day; not talking, not researching, not being with him. It felt… wrong. But she separated herself, not out of spite, but out of concern for his and the others' well-being. Whatever was happening to her, she would be damned if she allowed it to spill into their lives more than it already had.

"Been a while." Jonas spoke up, drawing her from her thoughts. He gave her a lopsided smile that expressed his discomfort at the situation. He had so much to say, but he didn't want to upset her or even worse, turn her away. All he wanted, all he had ever wanted, was to be there for her like Daniel had been. It seemed only fair. But he had also grown to enjoy her company.

She couldn't fall for him. He would be her undoing.

He couldn't fall for her. She would never belong to him.

"Should be an easy mission, huh?" Jonas asked and took hold of the straps to the pack he wore. Rose could tell it was heavy, weighing on his shoulders and becoming a burden.

"I certainly hope so." Rose replied with a small smile, trying to project that she was alright. He didn't buy it for a second. Something tickled the back of her neck and she placed a hand to it, rubbing gently. "I hope your mission is productive. Where were you heading again?"

"P36-231." He replied and Rose could see the excitement behind his eyes.

"SG-7, prepare for incoming wormhole." Chief Master Sergeant Walter Harriman's voice came over the loudspeaker. Rose and Jonas both looked up at the Command Deck and saw him as well as General Hammond. She looked back at Jonas and smiled. He returned it and nodded at her, a silent conversation happening between them.

"I'm sure you all will have the more interesting mission." She looked over at SG-7 and then back to him.

"Nah," Jonas began and rearranged the pack on his shoulders, "just a bunch of artifacts to dig up and catalogue. Don't worry. I'm sure Colonel O'Neil will have some kind of crazy mission instore for us soon enough."

He was trying to make her feel better. She gave him one more smile, nodded her head and went to join SG-7 at the end of the ramp. She watched the Stargate as it dialed Callandra and soon the wormhole burst through, retreating back to a standing puddle of blue light.

Jonas noticed the way Rose's eyes lit up as she watched the Stargate. She had always been amazed by the invention. It seemed like magic to her. She had admitted it to him multiple times. He himself had begun to take the Stargate for granted. It was simply a door to him and most of the others now, but not to her. She had gone through many times and yet she was still amazed by it, its power and its creation. She was one of the few.

 _Please don't go…_

Rose turned her head to the side and stared at the ground. The voice… had that been in her head? No. It was the same voice from earlier. She swore she recognized it.

Jonas had noticed her look and her action. He narrowed his eyes at her behavior. He quickly wondered if she was about to go into a _trance_ , but then Rose shook off the cold that raced down her spine and looked back at the Stargate.

"SG-7, good luck and stay safe." General Hammond wished them as the team marched out. Rose took a step up the ramp.

 _You can't…_

She blinked several time, trying to clear her head and took another step in protest.

 _You have to stop…_

She took another step as a cold sensation rushed over her again and forced her to stop. She stared down at the ramp and then looked back at the Stargate once more, trudging on.

 _Turn around and go back…_

Rose felt as though she was pushed back a step by some invisible force. She was standing right before the Stargate and stared up at it. Her eyes danced in the blue glow the puddle emitted as she questioned herself; her sanity. No one else seemed to hear the voice even though it was so clear, so close, so familiar… why had SG-7 had gone through the Stargate with no problems?

"Rose?"

Rose looked back at Jonas, who stood at the bottom of the platform. His eyes expressed concern for her even though she didn't quite know why. She licked her lips, knitted her eyebrows together and stared back at him.

"You didn't hear it?" She asked finally in a soft breath. Jonas slowly shook his head at her. Rose looked away; to the floor, to her right, and then back to the Stargate. Jonas watched her carefully. He could see the gears in her head struggling to turn. He didn't doubt she had heard something. He believed her. How could he not?

He also believed that she was _changing_ as Jack had put it that day in the suite on Kelowna. Jonas had heard their conversation; bits and pieces. He had put most of it together after days of thinking on it while confining himself to his room and office. Dr. Kiernan and Rose had plagued his mind for two weeks. Then Teal'c had come to him and told him everything Rose had spoken to him about. She had told Teal'c not **him**.

For a while it had felt like a slap in the face. Until he realized what was happening to her and what her words had meant – _he's changing, not dead_ – he hadn't wanted to go to her. He couldn't get himself to for some reason. It wasn't that he was mad with her for anything he just couldn't seem to face her. She had been right Dr. Kiernan had changed and he wasn't dead. He was healthy, happy, and safe. Rose on the other hand wasn't. He had promised her he would be there. He had promised to help. Instead he had shrunk away and hid while she struggled, suffered, and closed herself away from the whole world.

"Rose, what did you hear?" Jonas placed a foot on the ramp, intending to walk up to her. She shook her head, but did not turn to look at him.

"Jonas, Rose, what's going on down there?" General Hammond's voice came over the loudspeaker. Jonas looked back at him, shook his head and then removed the pack from his shoulders. He cautiously walked up to Rose and stood behind her, off to the right slightly. He placed a hand on her arm, but she did not move. She stared silently into the puddle of blue that was the gateway of the Stargate, but she wasn't _gone_ as she usually was in a trance.

Her eyebrows were knitted gently in tentative thought as she just simply stared at **nothing** and _something_ at the same time. He looked at the Stargate, but it looked normal. He then looked back to her, seeing her expression changing. Her eyes seemed to daze, lids lowering over her eyes as she locked onto something.

"Jonas something is wrong." She breathed out softly and the words struck him hard in the chest.

"What do you mean? What's wrong?" His eyes went to General Hammond on the Command Deck and then immediately back to Rose. He wondered if it had something to do with SG-1, but as Rose shook her head, braided pigtails bouncing over her shoulders, he knew it was something else entirely; something to do with herself. That worried him even more though. His heart fell into his stomach and his mind raced. There was so much he had missed, so much she had had to figure out alone, struggle alone with.

"Something's not right." She was certain something was wrong; off. The voice, her feeling… a pit formed and settled heavily in her stomach, unnerving her. Jonas said nothing and looked at the Stargate again, searching for an answer. He found none. Rose placed a hand on her stomach and breathed slowly. It was the strangest thing.

She looked to Jonas at her right and stared straight into his eyes. His eyes drifted to her hand and then back to meet her gaze. She licked her lips and inhaled sharply as though in pain.

"What is it, Rose? What's wrong?" He was getting worried. She wasn't giving him any answers and he couldn't read her mind or put anything together. He was failing her.

"Jonas! **What** is happening?" General Hammond demanded an answer. Jonas ignored him and kept his attention on Rose. Her eyes drifted closed and she raised her chin, standing straight. She tried to pinpoint the feeling in her gut, figure out what she was feeling and why. A voice crept into her head. This one was unlike the one from earlier. It was unfamiliar and sinister. She didn't understand what was being said, but knew enough that it was chanting. It was a language she didn't recognize. At least not at first.

 _Run Rosie…_

"Jonas," her eyes shot open and widened as they locked on Jonas. As she swallowed the hard lump in her throat he finally saw it; the panic, the fright, the recognition. She had seen something or heard something, something that no one else could. She swallowed again. "Don't let it take me."

Jonas had no time to respond. No time to react. No time to think.

Something shot through the Stargate and grabbed hold of Rose's arms, gripping them in a death lock. It was black and looked almost like a vine, wrapping around her arms, digging into her skin.

"Jonas!" Rose screamed as she was ripped from the platform and through the Stargate screaming. Jonas didn't have time to think and just acted, jumping through the Stargate after her. He sped through space, passing planet after planet, and landed on hard ground through the other end of the tunnel.

"Sir?"

Jonas raised his face from the dirt and looked up. SG-7 stood before him with confusion on their faces. Jonas pushed himself up and spun around in search of Rose, but she was nowhere to be found.

"Rose!" He called out in a panic, looking left and right in futile search. His heart thudded against his ribcage like the wings of a hummingbird. His mind raced and he got light headed. "Rosalina!"

"Sir what's happened?" SG-7's team leader, Erik, approached him with concern in his voice.

"Where is she?" Jonas rounded on him.

"Rose isn't here, Sir. We assumed she stayed at Stargate Command." Erik asked, taken aback by Jonas' reaction. "Did she come through with you?"

Jonas didn't respond. His hands went to the top of his head, one on top of the other, and breathed heavily. His thoughts raced and panic ate at him, heart hammering painfully. He looked back at the Stargate and found that it had closed.

He didn't understand it. What had happened? He had leapt through the Stargate after her and yet here he was with SG-7 and Rose was nowhere to be found. He ran a hand over his mouth and blinked in succession.

"Rose is gone."


	31. Doors

Sorry guys! Short chapter this time around. I'll post more soon. Enjoy!

* * *

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

Jack was livid, face turning red and eye bulging.

"Gone!? How could she just be gone!?" Jack snapped at Jonas from across the Briefing Room table. It took all his control not to leap across and strangle the younger man. As soon as he, Teal'c and Sam had returned from Alpha base he had been bombarded with the news that some _thing_ had reached through the Stargate and snatched Rose right off the ramp, right in front of Jonas. They had no idea what the thing was, where it had come from, why it wanted Rose, where it had taken her, or how to get her back. It didn't settle well with any of them. None of this did. None of it had. Ever since Rose had arrived nothing had seemed right.

"I don't know, Colonel O'Neil." Jonas placed a rigid hand on the table and looked across to the Colonel, who stared him down. "That **thing** reached through, grabbed Rose and took off with her. I followed, but I landed on Callandra with SG-7 and she went somewhere else. She wasn't anywhere on Callandra. I looked."

"Well then look again." Jack's tone was patronizing. Jonas had explained his side of the story several times. He ran a hand over his mouth, trying to remain calm himself. He soon took to shaking his head at Jack and the whole situation, letting his hand fall to the table top once more.

What **had** happened? Where had Rose gone? What was that thing that had taken her?

"There are too many questions and no one to answer them." Jonas suddenly felt how deep Rose's dejection had been over the last several months. She had felt this every single day.

 _How did she do it?_ – Jonas asked himself. It was like being stuck in a hole, seeing the way out, but never being able to reach it; always stuck in that in-between. It made him sick, his chest ache, and his head hurt. Everyone was always so concerned with everything else; Daniel's death, the missions, the Gou'ald. Rose's problems and situation had fallen to the wayside only to be picked up briefly here and there with no real turn around. She had put herself and her affairs off to help them, time and time again. What did she get for her selflessness? Anguish, solitude, and pain. Yet, day after day she managed to pick herself up and go on smiling, laughing.

Jonas shook his head again at the image of Rose's smile, the sound of her laugh, her mesmerizing blue eyes. His guilt was beginning to eat at him. Jonas looked across the table at Jack, feeling the seething anger radiating off of him. Jonas knew Jack blamed him. Hell, he blamed himself. She had been right there, **right there** , and yet he couldn't save her, couldn't reach her quick enough. The look on her face, in her eyes… she had felt it, known it was coming, had looked to him and begged him not to let it take her. He couldn't stop it. He had failed her. They all had really.

"So what do we do?" General Hammond asked and looked around at the team. No one knew what to say.

"We sit and wait with our thumbs up our asses." Jack suddenly spoke up, pushing himself away from the table and standing. His chair rolled back violently at his action. "Doesn't seem like there's a goddamn thing we can do otherwise."

He stormed out of the Briefing Room and headed down the hall. After a moment of silence Sam looked to the General.

"Colonel O'Neil is right sir." Sam piped up, earning General Hammond's attention. "Until we can either reach Luxima or they reach us or Rose suddenly appears, there's simply nothing we can do. We don't know where Rose is, what took her, why or how to get to her. We just have to sit and wait."

General Hammond nodded his head at her, thinking over what she had said and then stood up.

"You're all dismissed." General Hammond gave a small look to them all and then excused himself from the table. Sam and Teal'c left next, leaving Jonas at the table. He reclined back in his seat with his hands laced across his abdomen. He swiveled back and forth slowly in his seat as he stared out the large window of the Briefing Room at the Stargate that sat below in the Embarkation Room.

He struggled with himself about what could be done. There were only a handful of people he could confer with and all of them were out of reach. Rose was the one taken. Uinseann and Avia were on Luxima, through a Stargate that wouldn't dial the planet and Daniel… Daniel was gone so far no one could ever reach him again.

Jonas stood up from his seat so fast that his chair slammed into the railing by the stairs. He stormed out of the Briefing Room, heading for the elevator and riding it up to his office. Notebooks sat open, books were sprawled, and everything was in disarray. As soon as he had returned to the SGC he had begun researching, trying to discover any kind of clue as to what had taken Rose and why. It was to no avail.

He fell back into his seat at his desk and pushed the books away, some falling to the floor. His eyes caught sight of the notebook Daniel had written for Rose and dragged it towards him. He reread and reread and reread, but there was nothing in there that would help him. It talked of the Elders, of Rose, of Lucretia, of Mysticus and magic. He reread the note Daniel had left within it just for Rose as well.

 _Rosie,_

 _You asked me to dig a little around the records and the library, so I did. I also went back and rewrote the report about Luxima and all my notes on it. Just in case someone went snooping. Didn't know who, but I didn't want them to find anything because of me. So, here is everything I have. I was even able to get something from the Keeper that I think you might find interesting._

 _I don't know exactly what it is you're looking for, but I hope this all helps. Just be careful, okay? I've been a little worried about you. Haven't heard from you in a while. Kind of not like you to go this long. Don't be a stranger. Come see us._ _ **Soon**_ _. We all miss you and remember that you're not alone._

 _Lots of love,_

 _Daniel_

Daniel had been so deliberate and careful in what he chose to share with everyone about Rose and Luxima. Why? Was it because she was like a little sister to him? Was he protecting her from something? Or someone? Even what he chose to share with Rose herself was intentionally lacking information. He had been so meticulous so that no one would discover certain things, even her. He had taken so much time, wrote reports, rewrote reports, wrote his notes, rewrote–

Something clicked in Jonas' mind. He had looked through every notebook, every book, journal, piece of paper, and drawer in this office. He had torn it apart and turned it upside down. But there was one other place he hadn't searched. One place no one would think to search because why would they?

Jonas stood from his seat and raced out of the office.

* * *

Jonas stood outside the door with Colonel O'Neil at his side. O'Neil's hand rested on the doorknob tentatively as though almost afraid to open it. It reminded Jonas a lot of when he was just getting to know Rose. How he had found her in the hallway outside her room a week after Daniel had passed.

 _Jonas watched Rose as she stood outside her door, staring at it while her hand rested on the doorknob. She was hesitating. He approached slowly as though not to startle her._

" _I don't know how things work on Luxima, but here," a hand took hold of hers and twisted the knob to open the door, "not all the doors are automatic."_

 _Rose looked to him; Jonas Quinn. He looked at her with a goofy smile, folder in hand and at his side. Rose looked back at the room, eyes landing on something that changed her expression. Jonas noticed and peeked around the doorway, spotting the blue stargazer lily on the nightstand. He didn't understand the significance. Why was this flower so special to her? He looked back at Rose and questioned what was wrong._

" _I can't go in." Rose breathed out, forgetting Jonas was there beside her._

" _Why not?" He questioned. Was it the lily? The memories? …the darkness that engulfed the room, holding them both locked away inside?_

" _Okay," Jonas began and reached for the doorknob. "The best thing about these doors is that you can close them and open them again later."_

 _He shut the door and looked back at Rose with a comforting smile._

But they needed this door opened.

"Colonel O'Neil?" Jonas asked, desperately needing to move this along. He hated that they were here, that they needed to be here and that he was now rushing Teal'c along.

Jack opened the door and stepped inside with Jonas following behind him. The apartment was pristine. It reminded Jonas of a museum; statues, books, notebooks, pictures, little mementos. He saw pictures on a table in the living room and went to them. They were of _him_ and Colonel O'Neil, _him_ and Teal'c, _him_ and a woman who he stared lovingly at, and _him_ with Rose adorned with goofy grins and odd hats that said 'Irish Pride.'

"Saint Patrick's Day. It's a holiday we celebrate on Earth with excessive drinking and loose morals." Jack piped up from where he was in the small dining room that connected the kitchen and living space. "When Rose came to the SGC, she was kept inside most the time. Kind of how she has been for the last several months. The higher ups thought it was best."

Jack hadn't bothered to look over at the picture or move to where the others stood before it. He meandered around the living room, touching nothing.

"Daniel and I decided that she should see a bit of our world. Compare it to her own. Would do the kid well to get some fresh air. I wanted to go fishing. So we headed to my cabin, but in town they were having a St. Paddy's Day party. So we took her to a local bar. She had never drank alcohol before and Daniel was a light weight himself."

Jonas looked back at the picture, staring right at Rose. She sat on Daniel's lap sideways, arms wrapped around his neck, temple pressed against his. Her cheeks were flushed, smile too big, eyes glassy. She was drunk and so was Daniel, but they were happy.

"She looked so happy." Jonas commented and pulled his eyes from the picture. He had felt a spark of jealousy seeing the way she held on to Daniel, the way Daniel held on to her, how close they were, faces touching. Jack nodded his head mindlessly as he looked around the apartment. He finally caught Jonas' gaze.

"Yeah, she was." Jack replied and made eye contact with the picture. "She was a kid with no responsibilities, no one relying on her, nowhere to go, and nowhere to be. I think that was the only time she had ever allowed herself to live in the moment. Or ever had the chance. The Elders kept a tight leash on her. A little puppy they didn't want venturing too far away."

"Why did she ever go back?" Jonas had wanted to ask that question for a long time. He was too afraid to ask Rose herself. It had never seemed like a good time.

"She grew up." Jack's answer was simple. He gave Jonas a shrug as if to say there really wasn't any other answer. "She knew she had people waiting for her, people who needed her and so she went back. She had gotten her freedom and realized that she needed to give it up, to grow up, and do what was expected of her."

Jonas looked back at the picture and just stared for a long moment.

"She never ceases to amaze you, right?" The tone in Jack's voice caught Jonas off-guard. He couldn't figure out if he was joking or if the hidden meaning was meant to be there. Jonas looked to Colonel O'Neil and spotted the sad smile. In that moment, they shared something that had belonged to only him and Daniel; a love for Rose. She was like the stargazer lily she kept locked away in her room; rare, precious, and yet simple. To see her in full bloom was something she only let few observe under the right conditions. Jonas had at some point joined this group of privileged few without ever knowing.

"I'm sorry I couldn't–"

Jack cut Jonas off by shaking his head.

"You couldn't have done anything more Jonas. None of us could have." Jack had never been so… _nice_ to him before. Jonas chose not to say anything for fear of ruining whatever bonding they were experiencing.

Jack walked into another room, leaving Jonas alone in the living room. He took himself away from the picture and went to the bookshelf. He and Jack spent hours collecting notebooks, journals, loose papers, books, anything that might have information Daniel had left out about Luxima or Rose. Anything that might lead them in the right direction.

"Got everything you think?" Jack asked, looking at the boxes filled with Daniel's belongings. Jonas nodded at him and picked up a box, heading for the door of the apartment. "Hey Jonas!"

Jonas stopped at the door and turned back to see Jack standing in the living room, picture in his hand. He looked from Jonas to the picture and released a heavy breath.

"She knows Jonas." Jack began, but Jonas didn't understand what he meant and shook his head in response. Jack examined the picture over and over again. It was his favorite of Rose because she was just _Rose_ in it; just Rose. She wasn't an Elder yet and there were no Elders, no responsibilities, and no worries that plagued her. She was a kid still; an innocent, happy kid. It was taken at his cabin on the short dock of the lake behind the place. She wore a pair of pastel pink crop jeans that hugged her legs, exposing how muscular they really were.

 _Always running_ – Jack thought to himself as he looked her over again. She had on white muscle shirt he had given her that was decorated with Stormtroopers on it, the writing reading 'DON'T BE BASIC.' They had watched the movies and she had loved them so much that when he saw the shirt he had to get it for her. She stood on the dock with her hair loosely falling over her shoulders, smiling reaching from ear to ear, eyes bright and full of life. She struck a pose, hands on her hips, one leg bent, bending forward slightly as she released a hearty laugh from deep in her chest at something Daniel had said.

"Colonel O'Neil?" Jonas asked gently, realizing Jack was far from Daniel's apartment. He approached carefully, setting the box down on the coffee table. Jack looked to him and gave a sad smile.

"This was our favorite picture of her." He replied and looked down at the frame again. Slowly he handed it to Jonas. He placed a hand on Jonas' shoulder as though to comfort him in some way. "She knows you tried. She knows you're working yourself to the bone to find her; to save her. She doesn't need her powers to know any of that or that you do care."

Jonas looked to Jack and nodded his head, "Thank you, Colonel O'Neil."

Jack nodded his head once and picked up the box from the coffee table, heading out of the apartment without another word. Jonas stood there a moment and looked down at the picture. He gave a small smile, understanding why it was Jack and Daniel's favorite instantly.

Rose was in full bloom.

Jonas headed out of the apartment, picture in hand, and close Daniel's door. He headed after Colonel O'Neil and hopped into the SUV that was waiting for them outside. The entire ride back he was transfixed by the picture Jack had given him. It felt like some kind of solid initiation into Rose's private circle. While he smiled at the picture he couldn't help that it was a bit was bittersweet.

His eyes befell the box sitting beside him. Journals, notebooks, folders, and reports all fixed the cardboard. A hand mindlessly touched several of the items, praying to whatever divinity there might be that the answer was somewhere within one of them.


	32. Falling

}~{ Gild the Lily }~{

She was falling.

The air howled; cold and uninviting. White blonde hair, torn from its confines of braiding, whipped left and right, striking her in the face. She tried to open her eyes, but the wind was too great against her. She tried to breathe, but the gusts pressed harshly against her chest.

This was all too familiar. Like something from a dream.

She managed to squint against the wind and at first all she could see were clouds and dark skies, the moon, the stars… then she caught glimpses of lights far off in the distance and landscape, great sprawling landscape of rivers, valleys, and mountains. She saw the immediate ground and rocks, felt mist spraying across her face and suddenly realized she was plummeting towards the earth below. Her hair whipped against her face almost lashing her, clothes clung to her front and were retched up from her back by the force. Her heart hammered in her chest so fast she thought it might rip out her back.

Everything became clear just as she collided with the water below with a horrific smack and thundering splash. It hurt just as one might imagine it would. However, a fall like that should have just ended her upon impact. Instead she drifted motionlessly downwards in the dark water. Something tugged on her ankles, pulling her deeper and further from the light of the moon.

 _This is too familiar_ – she thought to herself as she looked down at her feet. She could barely make out the glowing blue eyes and the claws that had wrapped itself around her ankles. She tried to scream, but it was muffled, gurgles in the confines of the chilling dark waters. She looked up at the surface of the water, seeing the moon and a figure standing above The Falls at the edge. They stared down at her through the water, cloaked and face hidden from her.

Rosalina's mind was falling away, body wretched with a sudden searing indescribable pain that overtook her. The figure raised their hand, a petrifying blue light emitted from it and stretched towards the water. It touched the surface just as Rosalina blacked out, sinking further down with the Phantom and its glowing blue eyes unwilling to release her.

She had recognized where she was. She had known where that _thing_ had brought her. It was Luxima.

Rose was finally home.

* * *

Jonas paced his office floor impatiently. He ran a hand over his mouth and tried to work through the problem. His office looked as though a library regurgitated every book, ever journal, and every piece of paper from its bowels. Everywhere Jonas walked, he kicked a book or a journal.

He had gone straight to work as soon as he and Jack had gotten back to the SGC. He had worked for hours, days without any sleep or rest. He couldn't even remember the last time he ate actually or left the office at all.

He had read through Daniel's personal journals, his notebooks, books, files, even went through the thumb-drives, but it was all a jumbled mess. There were pieces here, pieces there, and all of them didn't seem to add up. Jonas knew something was missing. A piece of the puzzle that had intentionally been left out.

But what?

Jonas fell into his seat at his desk and leaned back, hand planted to his lips with his elbow resting on the desktop. He sighed softly through his nose as his eyes swept the materials covering his desk. He moved his hand from his mouth to his eyes and rubbed them, sleep threatening to claim him. When he pulled his hand away his eyes caught sight of a blurry Rose, posing in the picture Jack had given him. It sat on the bookcase across from him, staring at him with bright eyes and a wide, laughing smile.

He looked down at the items covering his desk and flipped through them again. He hoped in vain that something would jump out at him; that somewhere in red there would be the answer saying, 'HERE I AM!' and all would be well.

But there wasn't. There were only Daniel's writings, papers stapled into the notebooks, lines drawn to try and make some connection to some idea or other. It was… chaos.

"Dammit!" Jonas cursed, standing from the desk and hurling a book at the wall across from him. It hit the bookcase, the picture of Rose, and she went crashing to the ground. Jonas' hand planted firmly onto the desk as he cursed again softer. He let his head hang for a moment, shaking it gently and then walked to the bookcase. He bent down, picked up the book and set it haphazardly on the bookcase. He examined the picture that had landed face down, glass luckily confined and not flown to far away.

"Way to go…" Jonas chided himself and shook his head, picking up the pieces of glass that had shot in other directions. He pulled the trash can closer from where he knelt and dumped his handful of small crystal shards. He gently picked up the picture frame, photo falling out and covering the glass. Jonas tapped the frame out over the trash can to ensure no pieces remained and then picked up the picture.

In top left corner was scribbling, Daniel's handwriting, recording the date and location of the picture. Jonas flipped the picture in his fingers and looked over Rose's face. He gave a small laugh at her expression, remembering the looks she had given him that were similar yet different; unique only to him. Favorite was the squinted, confused grins that had held back laughs at his expense for something he had said or done. She was cute when she gave him that look and it had flustered him, made him laugh at himself.

Jonas relaxed and sat down on the concrete floor, gripping the picture with both hands with frame still held tightly in his right. He had liked sitting there in his office with her every day, talking to her, talking with her, laughing together, learning about Earth together, learning about each other. He had never had many friends, least of all girls who were friends, and he certainly had never found anyone quite like her on Kelowna. She was **different** and he liked different. He liked her, more than he was comfortable ever admitting to her.

Jonas sighed and let his wrists go limp, picture facing the floor. He looked at the back of the frame and shook his head, turning it over to look at the lack of glass face. Something strange and shiny caught his eye. It had been hidden by the glass and the picture, kept safe from all prying eyes. It was a disc, tapped to the inside of the frame.

"What do we have here…?" Jonas murmured to himself and pried the disc from the frame. He tossed the empty frame into the trash can, quickly cleaned up the glass and headed to the computer that sat in the back corner of the office. He set the picture of Rose up against the side of the monitor so she was smiling at him and then popped in the disc. His eyes scanned a few things, left to right, and then he leaned back. He gave a small, huffy laugh as a smile spread across his lips, "Well, hello missing piece."

* * *

Rose awoke in a start with the sound of rushing waters pounding in her head. She coughed and coughed, water expelling from her lungs and over her lips as her head gently bumped the ground beneath her. She gasped finally, filling her lungs with fresh air and tried to open her eyes. For a moment she thought she was back aboard the Gou'ald Mothership and would open her eyes to see Jonas hovering above her, but as he was not there. She was alone and cold and shivering, lying beside a pool of water inside of a dark cave.

She rolled herself onto her stomach and gaze for a moment into the dark depths of the water. She lifted her chin and saw the curtain of waters; The Falls. She was inside of the Falls, in one of the many caverns. She picked herself up from the ground, but found her body weak and aching. She looked to her ankles and caught sight of ghastly marks that wrapped around her flesh; residual bruising from the Phantom. She touched them gently and they seemed to sear, burning into her skin ever deeper.

She looked around the cavern again and spotted a single tunnel that surely led deeper into the Falls. She had no interest in following it. So, instead she made her way to the falling waters and reached out a hand. She was instantly rewarded with a similar searing pain that traveled the length of her body. She convulsed and fell to the ground, aftershocks racking her and reverberating through her bones. When she could move she did and quickly, crab walking backwards to put distance between her and the electrified waters.

Something wanted to keep her in. The Necromancer wanted her here, had brought her from Earth and now trapped her inside of the Falls. But why…?

Something caught Rose's ear. She turned her head slightly to the right where the pool of water sat and rippled from the falling waters. She moved close, the sound increasing, and peered over the side. It was indescribable, the sound she heard. Her eyes searched for the source of the sound. Her mind told her it couldn't possibly be coming from the water, but her instincts told her otherwise.

Eyes.

Glowing blue eyes peered back at her through the water from the depths. She felt herself shake, not from the shock or from the cold, but out of undeniable fear. Something told her to run, but she was frozen in her place as the eyes crept closer… and closer. The blue glowed brighter as it was almost to the surface. It breached the water and rose up before her like some kind of shadow being. Her chin lifted as she watched it stand up before her, somehow standing on the water's surface.

 _Demon_ – was all she could think of to describe it. He glowered down at her, height nearly eight feet tall. It outstretched its arms from its sides, claws curling towards her as it opened its mouth to reveal teeth yellowed and browned from eating raw flesh. The smell accompanied it; rot, decay, feces.

Rose wanted to vomit. She wanted to run. She wanted to scream. Her lips parted, but nothing came out. It lunged at her, but she rolled away quite ungracefully for a High Gunda and Elder. The Phantom didn't care who she was. It just wanted her.

Rose struggled to stand and then ran as fast as her legs would take her to the tunnel along the far right wall. It was dark, pitch black and the only sound came from the falling waters. She knew the Phantom was following close as her heels. She took a brief moment and looked over her left shoulder, seeing its glowing eyes getting closer. The further she went into The Falls the more silent it became until it was deafening. All she could hear was the sound of her footfalls and her heavy breathing. The Phantom slithered almost along the tunnel, eyes glowing and seeming to lock on her as though able to see in the darkness like some kind of Hellish creature.

Rose spotted a faint glow up ahead. With all her strength she ran harder, faster and then skidded to a stop at the edge of a cliff. She looked over her shoulder and spotted the eyes, frozen further down the tunnel as though the Phantom was confined. She swore she heard a hiss come from behind its gnarly teeth. Slowly, it retreated into the darkness.

Rose turned away, something telling her the Phantom was gone for now. Her eyes grew wide. There was a canyon deep within the The Falls, embedded in the remains of the mountain range that had once made up the area. She couldn't tell how far down it went nor how far back it reached. She turned to look back down the tunnel, but it was gone. Her hands collided with solid rock, running over the wall frantically in search for the opening. It was just gone.

She was trapped like a mouse in a maze.

"No, no, no… this isn't happening. This isn't real." She closed her eyes, breathing haphazardly and mumbling to herself. She opened her eyes and looked to her right hand. Something glittered a pale green color beneath it in the rock that she could not identify. This place was a scary story adults told children about in order to entice them to behave themselves. It was The Abyss. A place where the undesirable were cast into and never seen or heard from again.

Rose tried her hardest to peer out into the canyon, but whatever glowed in the rock was not strong enough to illuminate so far. She looked over the edge and saw nothing but blackness, above the same. She turned to her left and saw a small ledge, hardly more than two feet wide. She planted her back against the wall and slide to her bottom, knees pulled to her chest. She wrapped her arms around her legs and pressed her chin and lips against her legs, peering out over her knees.

What would she do now?

What _could_ she do?

Tears sprung to her eyes as a single thought ran through her mind

 _I want to go home…_

Wasn't Luxima home? Her home? Hadn't she been trying to get back here all this time? Wasn't this what she wanted?

"I want to go home." She whispered to herself in the darkness. A tear escaped her eye and trailed down her cheek till her pants soaked it up. This wasn't home. Luxima had never really been her home neither had Earth. It was the people she called home; Jack, Sam, Teal'c, General Hammond, Gaenor, Daniel, Jonas... They were home.

Rose's demeanor quivered as more tear raced to her eyes. Rose looked to her left again at the small ledge and picked herself up from the cold, hard ground. She planted her back to the rock wall and slowly slid herself left. She took hesitant steps left, making her way along the ledge.

She had no idea where she was going, what she might find, but she knew she couldn't stay.


End file.
